


Is It Enough To Try

by Wrotten



Category: Split (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2019-11-28 08:06:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 39
Words: 120,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18205790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wrotten/pseuds/Wrotten
Summary: An ad in the local classifieds offers Casey the chance she needs to escape the grasp of a man who has hurt her too many times. Brothers Dennis and Barry need a roommate. Casey needs a way out. Will she find the safety she needs or will her lies catch up to her before her uncle does?





	1. Idea

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: I own none of these characters, all belong to Split
> 
> An AU where each alter is their own physical person (The beast is not a part of this fanfic.) The characters adhere to the movie but backstories have been changed to fit the au. Casey's uncle still abused her, but her father died when Casey was a much younger age. Dennis and Barry have suffered emotional trauma, but in different ways.
> 
> It is my goal to update a couple times a week.
> 
> This work has more of a domestic feel then my previous work.
> 
> Thank you for reading, I sincerely hope you enjoy!

So maybe it wasn't the best idea she had ever had, but it was an idea.

Casey stood just to the right of a worn green door, staring at the gold letters.

Apt. 8B.

She had stared at that number all morning in the little ad posted in the classifieds that no one ever read anymore. She pulled out the scrap of newspaper and checked the address for the dozenth time, just to be sure.

Maybe if she just stood here long enough, the door would just open. She knew it wouldn't, but she couldn't seem to get her hands to work. It had been like that all morning, each movement made with stilted hesitancy.

Casey wondered what it would be like to be brave.

With that one thought coursing through her mind, Casey's hands managed to knock on the apartment door.

Nothing happened. No answer, no sounds disturbed the faintly musty air of the hall. Casey frowned, had she knocked wrong?

Was that even possible, to knock wrong? Her hands found their way into her pockets, creasing the words on the scrap of paper Casey now knew by heart.

_Seeking roommate. Shared kitchen and bathroom. Affordable. Must be neat._

It was posted with a number to call. It did not sound even remotely appealing in any obvious sense, but those four fragmented sentences had stared Casey down over her bowl of cereal one morning as she looked through the parts of the paper her uncle didn't want.

It had taken her two weeks. Two weeks to gain enough determination to begin to playout the scenario that had danced in her mind since Casey was a child.

The one where she got out. The one where she was free. The one where Casey didn't live in the shadow of a man who was supposed to love her, but never quite got it right.

He tried, sometimes. But that just made it worse.

She debated knocking again, but her hands had already decided they would not be leaving her pockets. With a sigh of resignation, Casey turned down the carpeted hall.

The apartment building wasn't in the best part of town, but it certainly wasn't in the worst either. It was aptly placed in Casey's mind to be fairly safe but still inexpensive. Maybe not the highest standards, but it was all Casey could afford right now.

It was certainly better than the alternative.

The thought managed to work its way to her feet and they paused. What was she doing? Ready to give in and go home just because they hadn't answered the door? What was wrong with her?

But she knew, Casey knew part of her had given up before she had even slipped out this morning. Because most of her knew there was no way this was going to work.

Things were never going to change.

Not unless Casey _did_ something.

Dimly she heard a door shut behind her. She turned abruptly, hit by another momentary wave of courage that would no doubt dissipate in no time, and managed to walk right in to the only other person in the hall.

There was a light grunt of surprise, Casey stumbling backwards from the force of knocking into the man. She felt hands catch her waist, steady her. Her eyes were fixed on the floor as she mumbled out an automatic apology. Just like that her courage evaporated. Then she heard a light, embarrassed laugh that sounded just a little bit like sunshine.

"I'm so sorry, honey, I am such a klutz. You alright, doll?"

His hands were still on her waist, and he had ducked his head a little to peer up into her face. Casey felt her eyes lifting.

He was warm. Blue eyes glimmered with a sincerity, the kind that let you know he saw people as people and not formulated polite responses. Brown hair was short and a little too carefully mussed. And he was smiling at her, the kind of smile that felt like it meant something.

"Oh, y-yeah. I'm fine. Sorry." Casey stammered out after too long of a silence, and felt herself blush.

"You sure?" He moved as if he meant to touch her cheek, brush the hair away that half hid her face. Casey tensed, but he seemed to collect himself.

"Right, boundaries." He stepped back completely from her, cheeks heating a little in embarrassment, "I tend to forget." He gave a nervous laugh as he tucked his hand in the pockets of his tan slacks, rocking back on his heels a little.

"It's okay," Casey's voice wasn't much better than a whisper, and she watched his eyes dart over her features, as if studying her. It was disconcerting, every place his gaze focused on made Casey wonder which fault he was seeing. She hated when people looked at her.

But then he grinned with such ease, "I'm Barry."

He extended a hand and Casey took it. His fingers were long and warm and he shook her hand just a little firmly.

"Casey."

"Well, Casey, you live around here?" His gaze roamed the hall as he took his hand back, and Casey shook her head.

"No, I was, well there was this ad I was checking out."

He didn't seem to mind one bit that she couldn't seem to form coherent sentences.

"Oh yeah, for what place?"

"Um, 8b?" She said it like a question, and watched his mouth pop open.

"Oh!" His palm slapped his forehead as he bounced on his toes, and Casey was distracted by the way Barry didn't just talk with his hands, he talked with his whole body. "I forgot Dennis posted that!"

"Dennis?" Casey questioned, trying to keep up. There was something a little overwhelming about Barry's personality, like getting hit with tidal wave of sunshine. She watched Barry straighten in mocking sternness that Casey wondered at.

"My brother," he raised his brows, then fell back into his relaxed stance, "he posted for a roommate a while back, but we haven't had any replies yet. So, you're interested?"

Casey found it best to just nod and let Barry keep talking, taking in the realization that this man, Barry, was from 8b.

"Hey, I could show you around now. Or did you make an appointment with Dennis to see the place?"

"Well, no." Casey knew it was strange. Showing up unannounced wasn't exactly the polite thing to do. But she was still on her uncle's phone plan and he liked to monitor her calls, to make sure his 'little Casey wasn't getting into trouble,' "I just thought I'd stop by..." She let it hang, sounding as lame as it was, and watched his face turn thoughtful.

"Did you just knock like a minute ago?"

Casey nodded, shifting her feet. The air in the hall was just too warm, and it felt unpleasant as Casey's gaze refocused on the ground. At her nod, Barry smiled,

"I thought I mightof heard something. I was in the back and wasn't sure. Well, come on," He turned on his heel and waved a hand down the hall, "Shall we?"

A key fit the lock and Casey watched as the 8b swung away from her as the door swung open. She stepped inside tentatively after Barry, watching as he ducked under the strap of the black messenger bag that was swung casually over his shoulder. He hung it on a hook on the wall, beside a few hanging jackets in the little alcove just inside of the door. There was a mat beneath her feet, a little table to her right with a little stack of mail. She had only seen about three feet of the apartment and the word 'neat' blinked through her mind.

Barry kicked off of his shoes, Casey fumbling to follow suit. Her black tights were tucked into her soft grey boots, and she caught Barry's amused look when he saw her socks. They were neon striped, a sharp contrast to the even dark tones of the rest of her clothes. She felt her cheeks heat even though Barry didn't comment, and she followed him further into the apartment.

The room opened up, warm tan stretching out to the wall of windows on the far side of the room. Light poured in. Casey found herself moving forward, turning to take in how bright everything was.

She wouldn't have thought, with how dark and musty the hall had been, that it would be so open, so clear. She had been expecting the damp odor of the hall to work its way into the apartment, but the air was scentless, almost sterile.

She took in the living room, the simple set up of furniture and television, all black, and evenly spaced. Everything was clean, exact, the only brush of color was the artwork on the walls. They were abstract pieces of blended colors, systematically placed around the room.

It was almost too perfect, little pieces of what would make a place a home neatly tacked in place, like the staged living room in a designer catalog. It would have seemed cold, but for the streaming sunlight that had taken the room.

"This is the general area, you'd be welcome to use it. Kitchen's through there," Barry gestured to his right, and Casey peaked through the opening, catching sight of stark white cabinets and grey countertop. "Which you'd also be free to."

"It's nice," Casey murmured. Now that she was here, she felt awkward. What was she supposed to do, ask questions? Look around? Barry rocked up on his toes a little, as if debating the same thing.

"So, bathroom's at the end of the hall. It's a pretty good size, but there's only one though. It's clean, though." He said it a bit bashfully, and judging by the state of the living room, Casey didn't doubt it.

"That's fine." It was a mumble inserted into the expectant silence, but Barry didn't seem to notice.

"Oh, and your room would be..." Barry was moving through the hall, leaving her to just follow him. The living room had an area rug of deep green, but the hall was a worn hardwood, scuffed with memories of previous tenants. It was almost calming, seeing those marks on the warm wood. Not everything in this place was perfect.

The last door on the right was opened and Barry motioned her in. It was dark after walking through the living room, a single window with curtain drawn was centered on the opposite wall. The same scuffed floor filled the room, meeting walls of steel grey like four bare panels. It wasn't large, but it was bigger than Casey had hoped, and she felt herself nodding.

There was nothing remarkable about it, but Casey looked around with even eye. It would do.

"This used to be Dennis's room, but he took the larger bedroom so he could use it as his office too. I know it's a little drab, but," He shrugged as if apology, and Casey found herself stammering,

"No. It's fine." He grinned, fully aware that she had already said that, and Casey ducked her head.

"Well," Barry clapped his hands, rubbing them together absently, "I don't know any of the lease details Dennis would want to go over, but after seeing it, are ya still interested?"

"I am," Casey stated, managing a smile, and she watched his eyes warm.

"Well Dennis should be home in about," he slipped his phone out of his pocket to check the time, "twenty-two minutes, if you wanna wait to meet him? Or you could schedule to come back...?

He left it hanging in question, and Casey bit her lip. "No, I can stay, that's-"

"Fine?" he questioned, ending her sentence for her. He laughed freely at the look on her face, "Sorry doll, couldn't help it." But his grin was unrepentant. "Thirsty?" he pushed off from the door jamb he was leaning on, leaving Casey to follow him back down the hall.

****

She sat on the stool, elbows resting on the counter, watching Barry move about as he grabbed a couple mugs and put on some coffee. He talked. A lot. but Casey didn't mind. It helped give her time to settle her nerves, to focus on something other than what her next few days were going to look like. The counter top was cold beneath her forearms, with little veins of black running through it that Casey's eyes traveled, finding patterns in the chaos.

Barry set her coffee in front of her, and she jumped.

"Sorry, doll. You nervous?"

Casey shrugged, fingers pulling the sleeves of her hoodie over her hands. "Maybe, a little? This is my first time trying the whole roommates thing."

Barry nodded in understanding, shifting so he leaned against the counter across from her. His pale blue sweater pulled across his shoulders as his forearms met the counter, his coffee held between steepled fingers. Casey was surprised by the way the sweater tightened on his arms as it stretched, at the lines of strength there. Barry didn't seem that big when he moved, but looking at him now, it was obvious he was strong. His features were warm, eyes a blue that shone with a teasing light that was layered with kindness. His entire presence was, in that moment, oddly comforting, and Casey found herself relaxing even as he told her not to worry.

"Dennis can come across a bit stern, but just answer his questions and you'll be fine. He likes things a certain way, but other than that, he keeps to himself, so don't let him run you off."

Casey's brow rose at the warning, but Barry suddenly tapped the counter.

"I gotta get something from my room. I'll be back."

He had only been gone a minute, Casey still sitting in quiet thought, when she heard the front door click open. She hopped up, eyes darting to the place Barry had gone, hoping he would come back before the footsteps she heard in the outer hall drew any closer. But it was just her luck that she was completely alone when a man rounded the corner and stepped into the kitchen.

He came to a dead stop, eyes locking on her in a gaze that made Casey a little cold. He was bigger than Barry, much bigger. They shared similar features, same eyes, same mouth, but his had been hardened and Casey found herself taking a tiny step back.

"Who are you." His rough voice clashed with an accent thicker than Barry's, and Casey swallowed.

"Casey." It was a pathetic whisper and she cleared her throat, "I, uh, I'm here about the room? For rent? the roommate room?"

Dennis just blinked at her, shifting slightly, "How did you get in here."

Casey's mouth popped open at the question, "Well, I, Barry said-"

The other brother thankfully chose that moment to reappear and Casey breathed a sigh of relief when Dennis's sharp gaze was turned on someone else.

"I thought you had class."

Barry shrugged easily, coming to stand beside Casey in a bit of casual support, "didn't go."

Casey frowned, wondering if that's where Barry had been going when she had smacked into him. Guilt flashed that she had interrupted his schedule, but Barry didn't give her time to apologize.

"I already showed her the place. She's still interested if you want to interview her."

Those dark eyes were turned back on her, and Casey told herself just to breath. "Give me a minute," was his only clipped response, then Dennis walked away.

Casey let out a breath, and heard Barry's snort behind her. "Told ya he was stern." Barry's warning wasn't entirely fair. Dennis wasn't just stern, he was _intense_. "But he's a good guy, you know, underneath. and really, Casey, he keeps to himself. You'll hardly have to deal with him if you decide to take the room."

Dennis had reappeared, stepping into view behind Barry, and Casey started, wondering if he had heard Barry's comment. He didn't react if he had, his entire expression held a hard disinterest that was disconcerting.

He held a folder, one he placed on the counter, opened, as he drew a pen from his pocket with his left hand. It clicked open, and then he faced Casey.

"What's your name?"

Casey swallowed, shoulders shifting as she told herself to stay even.

"Casey Williams." Pen scratches were his response as his gaze focused on the paper he wrote on. So far so good.

"How old are you Casey?"

Casey kept her tone casual, "Nineteen."

His gaze came up then, fixing her with a look of edged doubt, and seventeen-year-old Casey Cooke swallowed. This may be a bit more difficult than she thought.


	2. Move

"Birthdate?" It was a challenge, and Casey rattled it off perfectly, listing the date two years before her own. She had been practicing it for two weeks. She could see him do the math behind his eyes, watched him frown.

"Are you employed?"

"Yes."

She was surprised when he didn't ask where, a bit relieved she didn't have to use that lie.

At sixteen Casey had managed to get her GED, completely without her uncle's knowledge. It had taken some doing and a handful of forged signatures she had gotten too good at, but she had done it. She had spent the next two years spending every hour she would have been in school working under the table at a job she hated. But every cent she secreted home was saved, hidden and growing into a lifeline she would cling to in her dreams. The beginning of her way out.

She had planned to disappear when she turned eighteen, just take the money and run, but then her job had let her go.

She had gone home with head full of plans, she would find another job, it would be fine.

Her uncle had been waiting at the door. He had stopped by the school to pick her up, wanting to surprise her with an afternoon out. Delayed guilt for the night three days before when he had gotten a little too drunk again, turned into the monster daylight pretended didn't exist. When he hadn't found Casey he had gone into a rage. It was all she could do to convince him she had been skipping school, just spent the day out.

He had relented. Guilt, she had learned, was a powerful, vicious thing. Some days it pushed him to a place of self-loathing so deep he lashed out at every piece of the world around him. Too often Casey was the only thing around to catch the pieces of his anger. Other times it lingered, a reminder to try, to do better. That kind of guilt usually ran out in about a week or so. She could see in his eyes that he didn't fully believe her, that her uncle would start asking questions soon. She had worked too hard to keep the answers carefully stacked away.

She needed out. A place to hide until the calendar ran out and her uncle lost all legal claim on her. A brusque advertisement had seemed her only way out. Now, sitting here, facing down a cold stare with nothing but lies to build against it, Casey wasn't so certain.

"Any allergies?"

Casey shook her head. His gaze didn't fully raise, but he seemed to catch the movement as he marked something else off. He settled back, arms folding over his chest in a stance that was more than a little intimidating. Barry had been silent, letting Dennis do his thing, but now he moved past his brother to grab his coffee. The difference between the two was almost astounding.

Barry looked comfortable, natural, moving with a lazy type of ease. The blue of his sweater warmed his skin, made him look bright, healthy. Dennis was stone. Grey on grey with steel eyes a forcible frown.

He asked her a few more questions, before fixing her with a look.

"There would be certain rules. You'd be expected to keep general areas clean. You do what you want with your room, but keep the door shut. No loud noises after 10 pm." He went on, listing a few more in an unmoving tone. Barry stood behind him, innocently sipping his coffee, almost aggressively rolling his eyes. The rules weren't anything she couldn't live with, most were just structured versions of common courtesy.

Casey nodded when he finished, "That seems fair."

He blinked at her, unimpressed. He sighed abruptly, arms uncrossing as his hands moved to his pockets. He sent Barry a glance. "That's all I have to ask. I'll have Barry contact you soon with our decision."

Casey stood, understanding she had just been dismissed.

"Oh, ok." She hated the way his gaze stayed fixed on her, distantly assessing as she gave Barry her email. She said she was in between phone numbers. Gave them the email she used for work. The one her uncle didn't know about.

Barry smiled at her, interjecting what warmth he could before showing her out.

"It went well, sweetheart. If you still want it, I'll make sure the room's yours." He winked at her before bidding her goodbye, then he turned back into his apartment.  
*****

Dennis was glaring at him.

"This is a terrible idea."

Barry threw his hands in the air, "Oh come on. It's not like she's gonna cause trouble. She's obviously pretty quiet. But she seems nice."

"I don't care if she's _nice_ , Barry. I care that she doesn't look old enough to be on her own. Let alone move in here."

Barry walked right by Dennis, forcing him to turn in the middle of his statement, which Barry knew he hated doing. Dennis liked to do one thing at a time.

"She said she was nineteen."

"She doesn't look it." It was a mutter, and Barry drew up, sending his brother a sharp look. Dennis didn't just look against it, he looked like it was the worse idea he had ever heard.

"Look, you're the one who said we needed a roommate. They cut your hours, and I have to work around school."

"Yes," Dennis's chin cocked in irritation as Barry tried to turn this back on him, "But I was expecting..." he trailed off, blowing out a frustrated breath, and he could feel Barry's eyes on him, waiting for words he may or may not find.

"I don't like it." Dennis stated flatly.

Barry shrugged, picking up a magazine, he plopped onto the couch, kicking his feet up onto Dennis's precious coffee table. "Well I do."

He could _feel_ Dennis staring at his feet, and after a second, Barry relented. He liked messing with his brother, but he knew stuff like that really bothered the man. He dutifully swiped away whatever imagined dirt his socks could have left behind, and cast a look over his shoulder at his brother.

"No one else has answered the ad. If we want to rent the room, we're gonna have to give it to Casey."

Silence, and then Dennis's sigh. The one that said "I don't like this but I acknowledge it has to be this way."

Barry pulled out his phone.

"Let her know." Dennis relented

Barry was already typing out the email.

**** 

Casey wasn't holding her breath as she stared at her phone.

She had learned how to be still. To take shallow sips of oxygen, a movement so slight it was hardly noticeable. Her father had taught her that on a hunt. To be silent. Unnoticed. To breath without sound.

Barry's email had been short but upbeat. She could have the room, when did she want to move in? Casey's response had been a frantic lunge of hope. She hadn't even greeted him, thanked him, she had just typed out three words and hit send before her thumbs could betray her.

_Tomorrow too soon?_

Now she was waiting for a reply, eyes locked on her screen, refreshing the page in a constant stream until Barry's email flashed in bold at the top.

She had a new message.

_tomorrow is perfect! Either me or Dennis will be here all day. Come whenever!_

Casey closed out the message, fingers deleting the emails automatically, her thoughts spiraling too fast, heart beating too calm. She could do this. She _was_ doing this. Her gaze roamed without thought, slowly taking in the cramped room. There were memories etched in the walls, traces of the past drug across the floor. One more day, and she would never see this place again.

Just one more day.

She didn't sleep. It was foolish of her to even expect that she would. Her uncle rose at 6:15, Casey stayed fixed in her room until she heard the front door swing shut at 6:30. She waited for the sound of the truck's engine, the scrape of tires on gravel, the pause of silence. Then Casey moved.

She had made lists. In her head, not anything that could be found. She had imagined this scenario hundreds of times, carefully envisioned every detail. She would be calm. She would not forget anything. Her hands would not shake.

It was a blessing, in a way, how little her uncle allowed her to have. There wasn't much to pack. There were bare essentials, razor, shampoo, thrown into a plastic bin. Her clothes were next, and Casey reached into the back of her closet, and pulled out the small pile of neatly folded clothes.

She had started, two weeks before, pulling out the ones she would take. There was no discernable reason, no planned ratio between pants or shirts or socks. Casey had chosen them for one reason only. These were the only clothes that her uncle had never touched her in.

Everything else would be left behind.

It was a pitiful amount of belongings when she was done. 17 years reduced to a worn suitcase and a few brown boxes. She pulled a sleeping bag from the shelf in her closet.

Casey did not take her pillow.

Then she was ready. Standing in her bedroom, surrounded by echoes of memories she swore she would leave behind.

She had texted a cab company, and her phone buzzed as they arrived at the door. Her uncle would be able to see her texts, but Casey had a plan for that too.

She reset her phone to factory settings, and tossed it on to the empty bed.

She gave the cab driver an address in completely the wrong direction, sat in silence as he drove through early morning traffic. He let her out at a hotel way across town. Casey had always liked the looks of the place. It was simple, old-fashioned. To the point it still had a working payphone by its door. Casey didn't care if it was for ambiance, it fit her plan perfectly.

She waited til the cab drove off before snatching up the phone and calling another cab company. This one she gave the address for the apartment building. It may seem a bit extreme, but Casey did not want anything leading back to her, and her uncle could be _relentless_.

Casey lugged everything into the apartment lobby, a maintenance man watching with total disinterest as she made several trips back and forth to load everything into the elevator. It didn't even irk Casey. Common courtesy seemed to be reserved for the bright, happy people who smiled. Casey was content living in shadow.

It was an awkward, frustrating shuffle to get everything out of the elevator and down the hall, still heavy with too warm air. Casey was red faced and irritated by the time she stood in front of 8b. But it faded quickly. Everything faded quickly.

She had to knock twice, feeling way more embarrassed then she should when the door was flung open by a grinning Barry.

"Gosh, girl. You don't waste any time." He took the box from her arms without even asking, moving with an ease that made Casey a little jealous. She normally fumbled through movements like a dazed fawn.

She followed Barry in, letting the cool, clean air erase the hall from her senses. Barry kept walking right to her room, talking over his shoulder at her.

"Dennis is already at work. We weren't sure when you were gonna be showing up. I'm glad it's while I'm here. I'm way more fun to move in with." He sent her a cheeky grin as he swung the bedroom door open. "Here ok?" he asked, going to set the box by the door, and Casey just nodded.

She was feeling a little cold. The numb kind that kept her mind two steps back from reality. It was an even place, one she had watched much of her life happen from.

Her feet followed Barry back into the hall. He grabbed up two of the boxes, leaving a small one and the sleeping bag. He whistled a little while he walked, the melody mixing with the sunshine from the windows, and Casey felt herself blinking back into the moment.

"So is the rest downstairs or...?" Barry asked, dusting his hands together as he set down her boxes. Casey shook her head.

"No, this is everything. Thank you, Barry, for moving it. You didn't have to."

He waved off the thanks, settling a hand in the back pocket of his khaki pants. He wore a dark green v-neck sweater that fit him well, and Casey found herself absently considering the way he dressed. It was nice, almost stylish without being in your face, and she wondered if he did it on purpose, if Barry liked fashion.

"But this can't actually be everything?" he looked down at the few boxes as if to emphasize his point, and Casey shrugged a little, wrapping her arms around her waist.

"Well I don't have any furniture... yet. I'll probably get some."

He nodded easily to her reply, accepting it whether he found it odd or not. "Well, I'll let you get settled in. Holler if you need anything."

*****

Casey took her time, slow movements eating up the minutes as she undid every box. She organized her clothes along the top shelf of the closet. Set her sneakers and boots on the floor. She set her sleeping bag up along the far wall, plugged in her charger, the small lamp with the broken base. She had found it at a flea market once, liked the frosted pattern of the glass.

It hadn't been broken when she brought it home.

But it was hers, and Casey hadn't taken anything that belonged to her uncle. He could never accuse her of that. What she had was _hers_ and she set everything up with a carefulness that she would feel foolish for later. Mostly likely when she was trying to sleep, and her brain decided to relive awkward moments in aching detail.

It still didn't take long, and once Casey was finished, she sat back, and let herself breathe a little.

She was here. She had done it. Her feet wiggled a little as she sat cross-legged on her sleeping bag, and Casey felt the tiniest puff of innocent pride.

Then with a breath she stood, there was more to do.

She told Barry she was going out for a bit, he waved from his place on the couch, head bent over his sketchbook.

"Oh! Key's on the counter!" he called as if he suddenly remembered, and she detoured to the kitchen.

There was a set of keys on a little keyring with her name on it, resting on top of a sticky note. Even scrawl read, _If you lose these, you're responsible to replace them._

She knew right away Barry hadn't written that, and she frowned a little as she plucked the keys off of the counter, leaving the sticky note behind. _thanks, Dennis_ she thought, just a little bit sarcastically, and made her way out the door.

There was a market down the street, next to a large drug store that should have quite a bit of what she needed. She bought some groceries, mindful that she would have to carry everything she bought, and hit the drug store.

They had pillows, those ugly plush ones with characters on them she didn't recognize, but Casey didn't really care. She bought a few basic things, condensing them into her grocery bags, and trudged back to the apartment.

Barry had left while she was out, and Casey moved through the easy emptiness of the apartment, letting herself grow accustomed to the almost silence. Her bags dropped on the floor of her bedroom. She sorted through them for the groceries she had bought and walked softly back to the kitchen.

It wasn't fear she felt when she saw Dennis at the counter. It was a pang of surprise that felt just a little bit like panic.

Casey had thought she was alone.

But Dennis was here, seated at a stool by the counter, attention focused on the laptop before him. He was silent, tense even in the empty kitchen. He wore a light grey button up, straight grey slacks that felt slightly out of place with the overall roughness of his expression. Unlike Barry, who Casey had managed to feel out pretty easily, she could not get a read on Dennis. It left her worried over what to do.

She didn't want to interrupt him, but she had cold stuff that needed to go in the fridge. With a small sigh she took a tentative step forward. The bag rustled in her hand, Casey's shoes scraped across the floor, she _knew_ Dennis must have heard but the man did not react. His gaze never wavered from the backlit screen, and she remembered Barry's words. Dennis kept to himself. Dennis wouldn't care one whit that she was going in the kitchen. She was being ridiculous.

She took four determined steps forward and attempted to open the fridge.

The door wouldn't budge. She pulled a little harder, heat building in her cheeks, but the door stayed firmly closed.

She didn't want to look over her shoulder, so see if the eyes she felt on her were a figment of her imagination or if Dennis really was watching her be incapable of opening a fridge.

There was the barest sound of movement as Casey tried once more, then a hand appeared beside her as Dennis gripped the door from the other side and easily swung it open.

Casey stumbled back, not realizing he had come up beside her, cheeks flaming as she met his even gaze.

"It opens from the other side." The unnecessary statement held a surprising lack of condescension despite the cocked line of his brow, and Casey bit back a groan.

Why did she always have to make an awkward fool of herself in front of people? And it really irked her that her new roommates would be no exception.

"Uh, yeah, I got it. Thanks."

Dennis nodded once, arms crossing over his chest, and Casey found herself thankful it was Barry and not Dennis she had run in to in the hall. She was pretty sure walking into Dennis would hurt.

Suddenly she found herself wondering how Dennis would have reacted. Would he have caught her so easily, been led so casually into open touch? Casey doubted it. Dennis seemed to have the exact opposite problem with boundaries as Barry did.

"Top shelf is yours." he said, with a nod to the fridge. Then without another word he returned to his computer. Casey's eyes had followed after him, and she blinked, shaking her thoughts back into line. She forced herself to turn, to reach into her bag and pull out the yogurt and waters she had bought. The top shelf was clear and crystal clean, a sticky note with her name on it hanging from the edge in that same bold scrawl that had warned her about losing her keys. Casey pulled it from the shelf, distractedly slipping it into her pocket, feeling those eyes on her again.


	3. Twelve

"This would be a whole lot easier if you just admitted I was better than you."

Casey rolled her eyes, her gaze concentrating of the little red dots on the board in front of her. She and Barry had been playing battleship for longer than she thought possible. Every best-two-out-of-three led to another round, both of them far too evenly matched.

The most laughable thing was Barry was not even remotely good at the game. His guesses were so sporadic and without intent he could score a hit than name a point on the completely opposite side of the board. Casey was a bit more methodical, but Barry's setup varied so differently from game to game she failed in guessing where on earth his ships could be.

But Casey didn't care that they sucked. She was having fun.

_fun._

She had been here just shy of a week, no news of her uncle, no one showing up to drag her home. With Barry's and Dennis's schedule, she was alone for several hours during the day. She reveled in the silence, in the casual way she could do whatever she chose. She had gotten a new phone, new number on her own plan, with no connection to her uncle. She had started looking for jobs. The simplicity of having choices was almost overwhelming, and Casey held in the quiet moments when she could feel unafraid.

Dennis had, in many ways, kept entirely to himself. They passed each other in the hall, said a quite hello, exchanged necessary information. Their schedules had been posted on the door of the bathroom, so they could work out their showers more easily. Barry still rolled his eyes every time he saw it, but Casey noticed he stuck to the schedule.

It was strange. She had noticed somewhat of Dennis's peculiar habits, heard Barry's mutters complaining about the OCD, but she also saw the care Barry at least attempted to take. If he remembered he would put things back how they had found them, careful and exact. Other times he left a trail of discarded items through the living room with all the intent of a four-year-old.

What struck her the most was that Dennis never grew angry with his brother, even as he followed after, straightening up. Barry was a revolving door of evident emotions, often more than one at once. He could be frustratedly amused, or lazily put off over the smallest things. His rants would form, then die, and Casey got the feeling he did it just for the sake of ranting. He liked to talk, to build pictures in the air of dramatic experiences that had made Casey laugh despite herself. Every time a laugh escaped, she saw his eyes warm, a little touch of almost pride in his gaze, like a child who had won a prize at the fair.

Casey _liked_ Barry. He was warm and fun and never really pressed too hard about her. He would ask questions randomly, about her family, her life, but he grew distracted quickly and would be on to a new subject before he realized she hadn't answered. She was growing more comfortable around him, less like the awkward girl that couldn't do anything right.

That girl? She preferred to come out when just Dennis was around. She turned into the biggest klutz, constantly unnerved by his disinterested gaze. It was like his silence judged her and she had no idea what he thought. Was he annoyed that she was here? Would it be polite, to talk about something? Like... the weather?

Casey had no idea. He was never harsh or rude to her, almost distinctly polite. A few times he had reminded her of rules she had slipped up on, a dish left in the sink when Casey had gotten a drink late at night. It was a simple, "please don't do that." but Casey had blushed her way through her apology.

Why did she have to be like that?

There were times though, like when Barry was mid-rant and Casey was just enjoying watching him, that she would catch Dennis looking at her. His brow would be set in a slight frown, but the stern line of his jaw would be soft, his lips just slightly parted, as if he was confused. bewildered almost.

It was a look that over took her smile in shyness, that dropped her gaze to the warm green carpet and her thoughts into a spiral of overthinking.

Barry didn't always notice, but when he did, he usually pulled her out of it with an ease that made Casey think he had been built to perform.

Now they played on the living room floor, board set up between them. Dennis had taken one look at the mess they were making and purposefully left the room. Barry said he did that sometimes so he wouldn't overshadow what was going on, and probably to keep himself sane.

She had just nodded a little, because what was there even to say to that?

**** 

Saturday dawned and Casey rose late despite herself. She was not, in general, prone to sleeping in, but her small window did not face the sun, and the shadows had lulled her into deeper sleep. She was a little groggy when she stepped from her room, thoughts on the shower that would wake her up. She was reaching for the handle to the bathroom door when it suddenly swung open.

Casey blinked in fuddled surprise at the woman standing there, wrapped only in a towel. She was striking, was the only thing Casey could really manage to think. She had sharp, but pretty features, dark hair buzzed short, rich, dark skin, and she blinked at Casey as if her being there was the most natural thing in the world.

"Oh, scuse me, girl. Bathroom's all yours."

She walked by Casey easily, and Casey stared in a bit of stunned silence as she turned without hesitation and entered Dennis's room.

Casey shook her head, then shook it again as if that would change what she had just seen. Then groggily stumbled into the bathroom, hoping the warm air of the shower would make that make more sense.

It didn't. The apartment was empty when Casey dressed and left the bathroom. For a moment she wondered if she had somehow managed to imagine the whole thing. Dennis's door stood open, proof enough that the girl had really been there.

Dennis always kept his door firmly closed.

**** 

There was the tell-tale sign of a key turning in the front door, and Casey looked up from her place on the couch. She had spent the past two hours idly searching for jobs on her phone in quiet contentment. Growing a little bored towards the end, she was actually half looking forward to someone to talk to.

She heard them enter the apartment, the scuff as they hung their jacket, removed their shoes, then the measured tread as they moved towards the living room. Casey sat up.

She knew it was Dennis before he rounded the corner. Barry would have called out a hello, Barry would have moved with more energy. He went to move through the living room, leaving her be, when Casey suddenly spoke.

"Good morning."

Dennis came to a stop, turning to face her in a way that focused all his attention on her, the way he seemed to do everything. Casey's eyes darted to him, then away and back. Dennis's gaze wasn't something you could just hold. There was a forcefulness to his presence that Casey always bended against. He moved in direct lines, and Casey tended just to skit out of his way.

Barry thought it was a little bit funny, telling Casey she didn't have to act like a mouse around the man. Dennis was Dennis but there was nothing to be afraid of.

Dennis never seemed to notice at all.

"Good afternoon." The formal words felt contrasted by the rough, low voice that spoke them, and Casey flushed a little at the correction.

"Oh yeah, right."

She took in his appearance, dark grey button up, light grey slacks, straight and taut against his frame. She wondered if he was coming from work. She hadn't thought he worked on the weekends. He nodded a little, as if expecting that to be the end of their interaction, and began to turn away.

"I met your girlfriend."

He drew up sharply at that, expression flashing for a moment in real surprise that broke the stern line of his brow. He took a moment to think, to face her again before responding.

"Who?"

Casey's gaze dropped, fumbling now. Why did she always have to blurt stuff out? "There was a girl this morning. I ran into her coming out of the shower. She, she went into you room? I just assumed…" she trailed off, cheeks flaming, and watched understanding settle behind his eyes.

"Jade is Barry's sister. She stays here when she is in town." There was a beat of silence. "I slept on the couch."

Casey was aware of the utter confusion on her face. Jade was _Barry's sister_? Just Barry's?

"Wouldn't she be your sister too?"

She watched him change, straighten even more into an acutely defensive posture.

"No." The clipped response made it clear he wouldn't welcome any more questions even as Casey's curiosity hummed to life.

"Oh, ok…" She trailed off lamely and watched him shift, go to turn away, then stop.

"Barry won't mind if you ask him." The simple statement gave Casey an outlet for her curiosity, and earned Dennis a small smile.

"Thanks."

His gaze faltered a little as he nodded, this time turning and walking fully away.  
**** 

She didn't see Dennis again, which wasn't abnormal, as she considered how exactly she was going to bring this up to Barry. It was all she could do not to blurt it out as soon as he came through the door about an hour later.

In the end she managed to wait until he was seated beside her and reaching for the remote before she spoke.

"So I met Jade, sorta."

Barry surprised her by heaving a disgruntled sigh, dramatically settling back against the cushions. "Aw man. I was looking forward to introducing you two. She always steals all my fun."

"Well, we weren't actually introduced. I just sorta ran into her. Dennis told me who she was."

Barry's bow rose at that. "Did he? What'd he say?"

He didn't seem put out, just curious, and Casey shifted a little, crossing her legs beneath her as her hands unconsciously gripped her feet.

"That she was your sister?"

He laughed a little at the confused curiosity on her face.

"Yeah, she is. I got placed in foster care as a kid. Jade and I grew up in the same home."

"Oh," Casey drew back a little. It was obvious Jade and Barry weren't biologic siblings, but Barry being in foster care was never something she would have pieced together. Her uncle had told her about foster care.

_Children locked away in a place no one wanted them, their whole world fit in a single black trash bag they were forced to carry from place to place as they were kicked around the system. That didn't sound very fun, did it? That's what would happen to Casey if she told her lies. If she tried to run away again…_

"She can be a real pain, but I think you'll like her. She usually stays a night or two every few weeks. She's a flight attendant, so she's not always around."

Casey's mind was struggling to refocus, "that's cool," she muttered, obviously distracted. Barry noticed.

"You okay, Case?"

"Yeah, of course," she shook herself, sending him a quick smile and she watched his eyes search her face.

"That doesn't weird you out, does it. The foster care thing?" The fact that he even had to ask, that he had faced people whose reactions had managed to put that sudden, uncertain look in his eye, made Casey's temper suddenly flare.

"No, of course not, Barry."

His lip quirked at the slight vehemence of her response, "Good."

He settled back beside her, clicking the tv on as if they were having the most casual conversation in the world. In the back of her mind Casey considered, the difference in the brother's accents suddenly made a bit more sense. They were similar, but Barry's wasn't as rough, as strong.

"Hey, Barry?"

"Yes, babygirl?" he sent her a half look as he flicked through the channels, and Casey's cheeks warmed at the name.

"Well, I was just wondering, was Dennis…?" She didn't really know how to ask it, and she earned another half glance from Barry.

"Dennis wasn't in foster care." His voice had lowered, perhaps worried that their voices would carry down the hall. He sighed then, expression falling in a way that made Casey on the verge of changing the subject, but then Barry's hand came out. The sudden tenseness that shot through Casey was as automatic as the slight, sharp gasp of breath. It settled just barely on her knee, a seeking need for contact as Barry began to speak, and Casey told herself to relax.

"We, Dennis and I, we had a brother, when we were kids. His name was Kevin. He was," his brow furrowed a little as he shifted, thumb lightly brushing over her knee and she felt the warmth through her tights, "He died. When I was five. He was older than me by a couple years, I don't really remember him all that well. I can remember missing him more than I can remember him being there, you know?"

Casey swallowed as a dim image of her father passed through her mind. Her uncle never let her have pictures, never wanted reminders of the man he knew deep inside that he was betraying. She hated that sometimes her gaze would fix on her uncle's face, tracing out the features she _knew_ he and her father shared. Hated that sometimes she needed him to remember, hated that she never fully could.

"My mom tried, after, but it got too hard for her, she wasn't doing too well. Dennis was old enough that they thought he could stay with her, but they ended up moving me to a different home."

Casey took a breath, and allowed her hand to settle over his, "I'm so sorry, Barry."

He gave her a sideways look, head cocked a little and a small smile, "It's okay, doll. It was a long time ago, and I ended up in a pretty good home. I know that doesn't always happen, but," he shrugged with an almost embarrassed nonchalance, like a child growing shy under your gaze, "I got lucky, I guess."

Casey's half smile in return seemed to be enough for him, and the silence held a moment. "How old was Dennis?" It was a quiet question she couldn't help but ask. She had never really heard of one child being put in foster, and not the other, but she didn't know much about it.

"Twelve."

The word sunk into Casey. Old enough to remember. Old enough to understand.

Dennis chose that moment to step into the room. She doubted any of their words had been louder than the tv, but she still started when she saw him. Their gazes locked and his face changed slightly when he took in her expression, obviously knowing that she must have asked Barry. She watched his gaze move away almost dismissively, fix on something that caused a hard crease to fit between his brow. It did not seem like anger, but stern disapproval and Casey tried to follow his gaze, to the place where Barry's hand still rested on her knee.

She could not explain why she drew her hand back from his, why shame pooled in her stomach. It had been innocent, a comfortable connection between friends. But in Dennis's gaze it was obviously more than that.

Barry cocked a head at her expression, followed the line of her gaze to his brother, and raised a curious brow.

"Oh hey, Dennis."

There was a moment of tense silence. "Barry."

Barry's brow rose at Dennis's tone. He was using his stern voice, that one that was ironically softer than his usual voice. The one that said, "we need to talk." He gave Casey's leg an affectionate squeeze, shooting her a smile before pressing off of the couch. Might as well get this over with. It was not wholly uncommon for Dennis to need to speak to him. If he left something in particular disarray, if he skipped too many of his classes, Dennis would feel the need to remind him of the correct way things were done. It would be irritating if it wasn't a little bit funny, a little bit of a way to fill in all the years Dennis had missed out on being his big brother. Barry usually let Dennis do his stern correction with very little argument.

He followed Dennis down the hall, resisting the urge to whistle, knowing at the moment it would probably annoy Dennis. They stepped into Barry's room and the door swung closed.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Dennis usually began without preamble, but this time Barry was at a total loss.

"About…?" he settled his hands in his back pockets as Dennis folded his arms.

"She's half your age, Barry."

Barry drew back as if struck, the bubble of shocked silence bursting when Barry repressed the urge to laugh.

"Technically, she's closer to half _your_ age." Barry couldn't keep the humor from his tone, not even able to take Dennis seriously in that moment, a feat he knew his stern brother never appreciated. He only had six years on Casey, Dennis had twelve.

"This isn't funny, Barry."

"It kinda is, Dennis." Barry snorted, crossing his arms as he settled against the door jamb easily. "I wasn't hitting on Casey, you moron. We were just talking."

Dennis didn't even react to the name, "It didn't look like just talking."

Barry barked out short laugh, "that's because you have no idea what simple friendship looks like."

He regretted it as soon as he said it. He hadn't really meant it, it was a harmless quip but it settled like stone in his stomach as he watched Dennis shift back from him in honest surprise.

It was these moments that Dennis was the most open with him, when a brief moment of shock would break into his defenses. His eyes would blink too rapidly and you could see him forget to breath. He'd struggle for a half a second before falling back into a cold expression that made Barry feel like a total stranger.

He wondered, sometimes, about the years he was missing from his brother's life. He had missed his mother and his brothers terribly, liked to imagine them together when he was far away. His new parents had been wonderful, but Barry would always love his mother, always be a tiny bit jealous that Dennis had gotten to stay.

But sometimes Barry couldn't help but wonder if something had fallen through the cracks.

Sometimes he wondered if that something was Dennis.

His brother drew back before Barry could apologize, now even and calm.

"Just be careful, Barry. Something doesn't feel right about her."

Uncharacteristically mute, Barry nodded, and watched his brother nod and turn away.


	4. Tries

Casey didn't like Jade.

She tried to, she did. Tried to listen to story after story when she really had no idea what Jade was talking about. To laugh at the loud rude jokes that made Casey's cheeks heat. She had just waltzed in that evening, and sent Dennis to go get some pizza. He had left with surprising willingness, and now Casey wished she had somehow managed to go with him. Stoic, unnerving silence would be a relief at the moment.

Jade seemed intent on spending time with Casey. It was obvious Barry was excited to see his sister, was hoping they would hit it off. But Jade was a little too overwhelming. A little too full of… life.

She had a vibrant personality that splashed laughter into the room with an almost explosive force. She was thin and stunning and made Barry laugh so hard he cried, and Casey sat wondering in a completely impassive way why she couldn't be like that.

Like those girls in high school that seemed to fit and to fill any hole a room was missing with easy laughter and a bright smile. The nice ones who didn't need to be popular but were just so excited about life that they shone with it.

Or even the quiet, shy ones, who would still smile a little when they caught your eye, still found their little group where themselves would come out a little more each time.

The ones whose gaze weren't weighted down with shame so that all they saw of life was the tile beneath their feet. The ones whose bodies weren't covered in drab even layers that made even the most forgiving gaze find nothing of interest.

Casey wondered what it was like to be them.

She heard the front door and was up before she realized, the sudden movement drawing their attention, and she hid a wince.

"I'm just gonna see if he needs help… with the pizza."

They exchanged a _that's a little strange, but if you say so look_ , before Jade turned back to Barry.

"So anyway, I was standing there, covered in mud-" she launched back into her story as Casey ducked gratefully into the kitchen.

It was quiet, cooler than the living room, the lights a cool white fluorescent that might normally seem harsh, but at the moment she was in the mood for cold.

Dennis stepped in, taking in her presence with no show of surprise moving any part of his face. A plastic bag dangled from his hand as he held two boxes of pizza, and Casey dutifully reminded herself of the lie that had gotten her out here.

"Do you need help with any of that?"

He paused in place. "No." Short and clipped. Cold hard fact that didn't vibrate with the intensity of life. Casey felt that little anxious squeeze around her chest release a little, and her breath came easy.

Sometimes harsh was easier to bear than happiness.

He slid the boxes onto the counter, lifting the bag to place it beside them. Jade's laughter suddenly rang out, reaching the kitchen, and Dennis's gaze cut towards the sound. Casey didn't know if he saw her tiny breath of a sigh she tried to hide, but abruptly he was speaking. It hardly even seemed to be at her, but the words filled the quiet kitchen.

"She's good, once you know her."

Casey's eyes cut to him in surprise and he regarded her with a look.

"Some people just taking getting to know."

Guilt flashed at his quiet statement, and Casey tucked her head. She wasn't being fair to Jade and she knew it. They heard Barry and Jade coming closer, coming for the pizza, and Casey sighed, squaring her shoulders a little, determined to try again.  
**** 

"Who's Hedwig?" Casey asked some minutes later, having caught the name a few times as the others talked. Jade sent Barry a glance obviously asking how much Casey knew, and Barry sat back, a new piece of pizza in his hand.

"He was in our foster home. He was just a baby at the time, but we've kept in touch. He moved to a new home when Bob and Linda moved down south. You'll get to meet him tomorrow, actually. Sometimes I keep an eye on him while his guardian goes to mass."

Dennis heaved the slightest, unintentional sigh, and Jade rolled her eyes, "He's a bit of a handful, but he's a good kid. Patricia's gonna drop him off around eight."

They cleared the dishes, Casey grabbing a rag to wipe the counter when Barry waved her off. "Dennis'll do that."

Jade snorted a little, "Trust me, sweetheart, he's just gonna go behind you and do it his own way."

Casey didn't know there was a wrong way to wipe a counter, but she caught Dennis enter the kitchen as they left it, saw him set to work cleaning.

They headed to bed early, with Dennis taking the couch they were forced to adhere to his sleep schedule, and as much as Jade grouched about him being a "grumpy old man," Casey was grateful. Jade had grown on her, some, but she was exhausted.

She lay down on her bright pillow, staring into dull shadows until sleep slowly blinked them away.

***** 

Casey's eyes fluttered open. There were eyes, blinking at her, glasses on a scrunched up nose, a face just inches from her and Casey scrambled back in a jolt of sleep delayed horror as it suddenly spoke.

"My name's Hedwig! I have red socks."

Casey blinked, gasping at the boy, swallowing back the metallic taste of adrenaline.

"h-hello." She panted, trying to calm her heart. The boys wide grin was shattered when the door suddenly swung open and he ducked his head at Jade's abrasive scolding.

"Hedwig! For heaven's sake, leave the girl alone. Gosh, you need to learn boundaries, child. I'm sorry, Case, this boy has a mind of his own,"

She grabbed a squirming Hedwig by the arm and pulled him from the room.

"But I wannnaa talk to Catheeey." His whine was cut with a lisp and Casey sat blinking as the door swung shut behind them.

There was _no_ going back to sleep now.

She rubbed the sleep from her eyes with the heel of her hand, mouth expanding with a yawn as she swung her door back open. Maybe after she brushed her teeth she would feel like an actual human being instead of a zombie who had just been scared brainless.

There was something hard in her way, and she frowned at it. It was black and it moved away rather sharply.

"Excuse me."

The voice worked its way into her brain and Casey's gaze shot up.

Dennis was blinking at her, brow raised a trifle though she didn't know why. His black long-sleeved shirt clung a little too well when he folded his arms over his chest. She was surprised to see him like this, his grey slacks replaced by light grey sweats.

"Do you own another color?" Casey mumbled, tongue sleep logged, and the brow cocked a little higher.

"Do you?"

His tone held absolutely zero, well, anything, and Casey yawned a little, half stretching.

"Good point," she shuffled by him, letting the door to the bathroom swing shut behind her. Her reflection in the mirror jolted her. Her hair, usually a flat black mop, had managed to form a tangle that would make a bird's nest jealous. Her face was pale, not a new feature, except the lines of red where the creases from her pillow had worked their way into her face.

She groaned, letting her forehead fall against the glass, feeling the tight stretch down her back from the nights of sleeping on the hard floor. She was such a mess.

A little while later she made her way down the hall, a least a little bit presentable. A warm scent led her into the kitchen where Barry stood by the stove, flipping pancakes.

"Cathey!" Hedwig was at the counter, and at Jade's pointed look, his smile turned shy, "I'm sorry for waking you up." His blonde hair fell across his forehead, green eyes filled with genuine bashful apology, and Casey couldn't help her smile.

"It's okay, Hedwig."

She moved to the seat beside him, sending Barry a grateful smile when he set a plate in front of her, stacked with pancakes. Barry had obviously attempted to shape them into something that may be animals? She wasn't really sure, but Hedwig was excited.

"Cooool! You got a tiger!" He stared at her top pancake a little jealously before turning back to his own.

"I like tigers," he said, shoveling a bite into his mouth, "I -ink the-r etty rong."He talked between chews, reaching for his glass of milk as he swallowed.

"But gue'th what. Mr. Dennis says that the strongeth'st animal in the world is a type of beetle. Isn't that th'o weeeird?" His feet started kicking as they dangled off of the stool and his head bobbed a little with the motion.

"They're like th'o small, and little, etc. But Mr. Dennis says you don't have to be big to be strong."

Casey nodded along to Hedwig's words, "Well, ants are pretty tiny, and they're strong."

"Yeah, but I want to be both! Mr. Denni'th is big and strong."

Jade came around the counter, offering Casey some coffee,

"Let the girl eat, Hedwig. You talk more than a chipmunk on caffeine."

Hedwig giggled at that, ducking his head over his pancakes, feet still kicking up a happy rhythm. Casey let her gaze wander over the kitchen. Barry by the stove, humming away, contentedly almost burning pancakes. Jade was pouring Hedwig some more milk, quiet for once, and Casey wondered if she wasn't really a morning person either.

It felt warm, kinda light. Like a little scene through the window of a home on a greeting card.

It was nice, and it made Casey just a little bit hopeful. A little bit ashamed.

Each one of them had come from the place Casey had feared more than anything. The cold, vicious system that threw children away and let the people who hurt them walk free. It was all she had believed for years. It had stopped her every time she thought, half hoped that someone would notice, that she was half tempted to just forget her hoodie one day at school. It wouldn't be her fault if someone saw the hand prints on her arm, could see what Casey felt, the pain in each individual finger mark that throbbed on their own.

But they wouldn't believe her. Her uncle had promised her that. _No one would listen to the awkward little quiet girl who misbehaved in class._

And if they _did_ believe her. Her uncle had painted that possibility worse than anything yet. _They would take her and force her into places where no one wanted her. But he wanted her, didn't she know that. Couldn't she see that he loved her, when no one else would, no one else could?_

But warmth flowed from each of them, linked to each other, surrounding Casey until it almost strangled her. They had gone into her nightmare and come out with each other, with a _family._

If she had been brave enough, long ago, could maybe, could she have been one of them?

Her head started to ache in time with her heart beat, pressure inside wanting out. She did her best to smile at Hedwig, talk to the boy, enjoy him for the fun little boy he was. But it was growing harder to focus.

When Hedwig asked if he could play in her room she had said yes without really thinking. The boy was off like a shot, super promising not to break anything.

Barry and Jade had taken over the living room, tv blaring with a talk show they provided constant commentary to.

Casey's head felt like it was going to explode.

She moved down the hall only to remember that Hedwig was in her room. She could hear him laughing, running a toy truck along the walls, and she didn't have the heart to make him stop, even if he was turning her only sanctuary into a highway.

Her only other hope was a closed door to the left, and she was knocking before she really even considered.

It swung open rather quickly, Dennis blinking at her in even surprise.

"Is something wrong?"

Casey frowned a little, squinting through the pain in her head, "Well, Hedwig's in my room."

Dennis nodded, "I'll tell him to leave," He stepped forward as Casey's hand came out,

"No," her palm met his chest, and he jarred to a stop at the contact, staring at her with an expression fixed in scripted shock. "Sorry," she mumbled, dropping her hand quickly, shaking the sudden heat from her fingertips. "I told him he could be in there, but Jade and Barry are watching something, and well, I…"

She trailed off, suddenly not even able to remember why she had knocked on his door. What had her thought process even been?

"I just wanted quiet."

Dennis opened his mouth, then frowned, jaw working, before going to speak again.

"You… wanted to come in?" It was a guess at what she was even requesting, not an invitation, and Casey's cheeks heated.

"Look, forget I even, it's fine. I'll go,"

But Dennis was stepping back, swinging the door open wider with an expression of stern bewilderment, and Casey found herself taking a step in.

The coolness enveloped her, pressing against the flushed skin of her face, easing the pounding of her head. She spotted the window directly across from them, the cream shade was drawn but for the last few inches where the window was cracked open. Fresh, clean, cold air gently circulated the room, and it felt wonderful.

Her eyes slowly took in the room, surprised by the shadows. Both windows were darkened with the shades, and a single lamp was lit by the bed. Soft music played from somewhere.

"I don't want to interrupt you," Casey fumbled.

Dennis waved a hand, standing to the side a little awkwardly, watching her.

"I was just reading."

"In the dark?" Casey questioned, and he shrugged a little.

"I set my tablet on night setting." He rubbed the back of his head a little self-consciously, "I get headaches if I read with too much light."

Casey's brow rose, but she didn't comment. "so, what were you reading?" Casey asked after a moment. Dennis's response was to hand her the tablet he had set on his desk.

She glanced down at the black screen, reading the white words easily in the shadows. Lions and Tigers and Bears: the facts and the Myths.

"You like animals?" she asked, handing it back, and he shrugged a little as he took it.

"Hedwig does. Gives me something to talk about."

The thought of him in here, reading, so he could have something to relate to Hedwig with sent a strange feeling through Casey.

"And, classical music?" she asked, identifying the genre, softly playing, "You like that too?"

"No." His answer was immediate, but not forceful, and he shifted at her confused look.

"It's for Hedwig."

" _Hedwig_ likes classical?" her tone held her surprise.

"No. He hates it."

"…what?" Casey gave up trying to understand, and just asked.

"Hedwig looks with his hands. I try to dissuade him from coming in here."

Casey regarded him evenly, trying to tell if he was joking. "you don't just… lock your door?"

He shrugged, "Doesn't work."

"And classical music does?"

His lips quirked, "Yes."

Casey stared, before suddenly blowing out a light breath of laughter, "I'll have to remember that."

Her eyes roamed a little, fixing on the dresser across from then, lined with little figures.

"Do you mind if I?" she pointed towards the dresser, and Dennis shifted.

"Just, don't touch?" he seemed to frown at himself for even asking, but Casey held her hands up in mock surrender.

"Promise."

She walked forward, curious in the dim light. They were little models, airplanes, cars, and different 3-D metal puzzles. All with tiny, intricate pieces carefully assembled. She was amazed by how perfect each was, how exact. She understood fully now why Dennis kept Hedwig out, she shuddered to think what an excited nine-year-old could do to these.

Her headache was receding in the cool and quiet, but she became increasingly aware that Dennis hadn't moved. He still stood, silent and tense by his desk, and the feeling of being an intrusion crept over Casey.

"I'm sorry for interrupting you," she turned suddenly, her arms wrapping around her stomach in an odd bundle of nerves, "thank you for letting me in, but I can go now."

He stood in complete silence and watched her cross to the door.


	5. Careful

It had been a long week.

Which was maddening considering it was only Thursday.

Hedwig's guardian had come down with pneumonia. Patricia was, by all reports, doing better, but still couldn't keep up with a nine-year-old boy. And so, Hedwig was over almost constantly.

In some ways Casey loved it, there was something so energetically joyful about the kid that made her want to get down on the floor with a toy car of her own and ask him what city they were racing through this time. He was like a forcible breath of fresh air.

Other times… there were moments when she wanted to hide in her room and shut the door in his face. She felt _terrible_ every single time she felt like that, she didn't want to be mean, short tempered. But Casey didn't know what to do with that much bright energy, and Hedwig had no concept of keeping to himself. After letting him play in her room, it was obvious the boy now considered it free reign. Casey didn't truly mind that so much, accept that if her head needed a break, she had nowhere to go.

Barry didn't seem to mind at all, seemingly impervious to the noise. Dennis kept as much out of the way as ever, but Hedwig's presence had the apartment in an unending cycle of unusual disarray. Casey would hear Dennis come home from work, see him pause out of the corner of her eye. Hear his sigh, the tired kind, before he straightened and started cleaning up.

She tried to help out, but Barry usually reminded her it was pointless. Every time Dennis came home and straightened something Casey had already fixed, Barry sent her a tiny but all too smug smirk that easily spelled _out told ya so._

Barry thought it was hilarious. Casey didn't know what to think. She tried to pay more attention to where things went, but Dennis fixed details Casey hadn't even seen. She wondered if it really was better to just let him do it, but that didn't seem very fair either.

Now she was in the kitchen, slathering an obscene amount of peanut butter onto a single slice of bread, making Hedwig the boy's version of a sandwich.

He could hear Hedwig in the living room, asking Barry a hundred questions while the man tried to work on a project. It was a little bit amazing, despite his concentration to his work, Barry managed to respond to at least half of Hedwig's unending questions.

He came bounding up when she called him, taking the plate carefully with a wide eyed grin.

"Thank'ths, Miss Cathey! I'm gonna go eat it in your room!"

He darted off before Casey really had a chance to say anything, and with a shrug, Casey turned back to the counter. She screwed the lid back onto the peanut butter, popping the spoon she had used to scoop it out with into her mouth. She turned to put the jar away, jerking to a harsh stop at the sight of Dennis standing in the doorway. She must not have heard him come home.

"Hi," The word was rounder than it should be, spoken around the spoon still globbed with peanut butter in her mouth. She slowly removed it. He nodded his greeting, eyes moving over her with almost clinical precision. It was when his brow quirked just slightly that Casey remembered what she was wearing.

She was in Barry's shirt. The one with cats all over it that Hedwig _loved_. It was his favorite, and he had _begged_ her to put it on. The fact that Barry was wearing a matching one in the living room only tripled Casey's embarrassment.

"I was making Hedwig a sandwich!" she blurted it out, a forceful mumble around the peanut butter, trying to change the subject she saw building in his eyes.

His eyes darkened as he frowned, his arms folding over his chest. "You shouldn't have to. That's Barry's responsibility."

"Oh, I don't mind," the jar of peanut butter was still in her hand, and she used it as an excuse to move, to break the gaze, that stiff line of focus that was always a little bit overwhelming. She bent to return it to the cupboard, swallowing furiously, trying to get the last of the peanut butter down.

She had taken to, the last few days, saying hello to Dennis, when she could. It was never much, a quiet "hey" when they passed. But Dennis always stopped. Always turned, gave his full attention to his response, even if it was just a simple "hello" back.

Being the object of that much strict attention was disconcerting. She was half afraid to say more than that. Dennis wouldn't get distracted in the middle of a sentence. Dennis would notice if she conveniently didn't answer a question.

Dennis shifted as she turned back, glancing at the empty counter and stools.

"Where is Hedwig?"

Casey went to brush away hair that had fallen in her face and missed, hoping Dennis didn't notice when she quickly tried again.

"Uh, he wanted to eat in my room."

Dennis was already frowning. Some how he managed to do it twice. "He shouldn't be allowed in your room. It's yours."

Very, very briefly, Casey wondered why that thought had never seemed to cross Barry's mind. But then Dennis was speaking again, "I'll ask him to leave." He was moving forward, striding out the kitchen and Casey found herself following, catching up with him in the hall.

"I really don't mind."

Dennis paused, going to respond when a sudden crash came from Casey's room, followed by a dismayed cry.

Casey wasn't even sure when Dennis started moving, but he was already three steps ahead of her when she got her feet into gear.

He reached the door, coming to a stop, a single word forcibly packed with stern disapproval.

"Hedwig."

"I'm sho th'orry, Mr. Dennis! I didn't mean to, I tripped!" His voice warbled with tears, Casey understanding why when she reached the doorway beside Dennis.

Her lamp lay in pieces on the ground. Hedwig was on his knees beside it, tears trailing beneath his wide glasses. His hands went towards the broken glass, trying to clean it up.

"No, wait-"

"Hedwig. Stop."

They both moved at once, Casey felt his hand at the small of her back, propelling her forward so he could fit through the door behind her. It was a powerful move, somehow completely lacking aggression, and dimly Casey wondered if that was why her body didn't seize at the contact like it normally would.

Casey didn't like to be touched.

Hedwig had jumped at Dennis's harsh tone, and sat sniffling as Dennis quickly checked his hands.

Casey put her hand on the boy's shoulder. She couldn't stop the surprise that flipped in her stomach when Hedwig snuggled against her. "You aren't mad, are ya Cathe?"

Casey closed her eyes a moment, letting her hand rub soothingly on his back. It felt silly, she knew it was foolish, but a strange little bubble was forming in her. It was chance for a child to face a broken object and not be afraid.

"It's okay, Hedwig, It's just a lamp, I know you didn't mean to break it. Of course I'm not mad."

She felt Dennis's eyes on her, wondered if he heard the slight wobble of her voice, but Casey didn't look.

Dennis cleared his throat. "Why don't you go in the living room. I'll clean this up."

Casey nodded and helped Hedwig to his feet, glad when his sniffles calmed before they reached the living room.

**** 

"Gueth what."

Casey looked up from their puzzle to the boy across the coffee table from her. "What?"

It was several hours later, and Dennis and Barry had gone out to pick up Jade. Just Dennis was going to go, until Casey had volunteered to keep an eye on Hedwig.

"I go to school, at my hou'th."

"Really, that's cool."

"Yeah. I used to go to real school, but the other kid'th made fun of me a lot. Because I don't always'th talk right. Mi'th Patricia says don't mind them. Jade says I should like the way I talk, that it's different and that's what make'ths me beautiful."

Hedwig pulled a face, setting down the corner pieces he was trying to line up, "But I thought boy'th weren't th'upposed to be beautiful."

"Well anyone can be beautiful," Casey answered idly, dropping a few more edge pieces in front of Hedwig, "Even boys."

Hedwig looked doubtful. "Even, like, Mr. Barry?"

An image of Barry came to Casey's mind, eyes bright and flashing with laughter, eager smile full of joy.

"Yeah. Even Mr. Barry"

Hedwig pulled a ridiculous face, and leaned forward in a half whisper, "What about Mr. Dennis."

Casey choked on a surge of laughter before she could stop herself, not hearing the front door open until Hedwig suddenly perked up, looking behind her.

"Mr. Barry! Casey think'ths you're beautiful!"

Casey turned enough to see Barry strike a pose, bow dramatically, "Why thank you, Casey."

Casey thought she knew what mortification felt like. Hedwig's next words told her she hadn't had any idea when his gaze focused further behind her.

"But not you, Mr. Denni'ths."

Casey turned slowly where she sat.

Dennis stood just inside the room. Gaze fixed on Hedwig, an odd expression on his face.

"No, I, I didn't-" Casey was stammering, ignoring Barry's snicker under his breath, when Dennis's gaze moved slowly to hers.

She stopped at the half glimmer of humor in his eyes.

It brightened them. Turned the cold grey stone into something warmed by the sun.

"Oh, admit it, Case." Barry plopped onto the couch beside where she sat on the floor, "You think Dennis is pretty."

"Shut up, Barry." Her voice was low but Hedwig caught it.

"Yeah!" he bounced up in his seat, "Th'ut up Mr. Barry!"

Casey covered her mouth as Jade stepped in behind Dennis.

"Hedwig Williams Louis, what did you just say?!"

****

 

They had pizza, again, Jade complaining she couldn't get a good slice anywhere else. Jade told Casey all about her job, and Casey was more than alittle surprised to hear Jade's favorite part was the passengers. She loved how many different types of people she met. It was crowded around the kitchen counter, there was no way Dennis would let them eat in the living room, but it was almost fun. Dennis leaned against the counter by the sink, a good five feet away, watching Barry sneak Hedwig far too many pieces of pizza. Jade kept stealing the pepperoni off of Barry's piece when he wasn't looking.

It was nice, until Casey's head began to hurt for completely no reason. Maybe it was the lights or the laughter, but she set her own slice down half eaten, suddenly not hungry anymore. The others didn't notice, talking amongst themselves as Dennis finished his pizza and left the room.

Casey didn't want to be rude, and she stayed in her seat til the others were done, but when they headed into the living room to watch something, she retreated down the hall.

She was passing by Dennis's door when her feet slowed in surprise. It was open. She didn't really know why she paused, why she was peeking in.

The light was on, filling the room with clarity. The walls were a deep tan. She wondered if Dennis had chosen that color. It seemed almost too warm. Neat shelves held sculpted rectangles of books all carefully placed and completely free of dust. Blocks of furniture met pristine trim around windows and floors. Nothing was out of place. It looked almost preserved in a vacuumed stillness.

"Excuse me."

Casey physically jolted at the voice just behind her, her elbow jamming into the door frame, and she winced, rubbing it automatically. She met Dennis's even gaze.

"Are you alright." He asked, but there was no sign of concern in the blank expression of his eye. He looked entirely closed off.

Casey wondered how she had never noticed before, the shadow behind Dennis's eyes.

He reminded her entirely of steel.

Funny thing about steel, it had to be hardened. Placed in fire and quenched in oil. Heated and cooled with even control. But it could be done wrong. Steel could be too hard, too brittle, shatter with force unless there were parts that weren't as hardened. Pockets of softer steel to absorb the force of blows.

She didn't see any of those in Dennis's eye. Without them steel could break.

His gaze was completely cold, and Casey shifted out of his way without a word. He stepped by her, pausing in his doorway. His feet turned so he could speak to her; Dennis never spoke over his shoulder.

"Were you wanting to come in."

Not an invitation. A question of intent.

So why on earth did Casey nod.

**** 

Dennis watched the girl move, step through the doorway into a place that should be his. There was laughter floating too loud from the living room. He understood why she wanted to get away.

But Hedwig wasn't in her room this time.

So why was she here.

She stood, as quiet and half flustered as the day he had first seen her, flushed and maybe just a little bit afraid. Dennis had taken her in, dark hair and dark eyes, paleness in between. Like a black and white photo, the only brush of color her mouth. Lips too small, pressed tight.

He knew there was a word for it. Barry had mentioned it once. The name for lips like hers. It had irritated him that he couldn't remember. Had found himself Googling at 2 am.

Rosebud.

He stays away. Barry's warning was clear. _Make sure she's comfortable._ Which is Barry's polite way of saying just leave the poor girl alone. He's careful around the careful girl. Watches her tiptoe around him, pale features and too full eyes.

Watches her shelf in the refrigerator fill up with evidence that she was there.

But something's not right, her eyes are too open before they drop away. She grows more comfortable around Barry, smiles, uses sentences that don't stutter and die out. But she never quite loses that awkward hold of uncertainty. She and Barry become a friendship of laughter. Dennis watched sad eyes warm.

But he catches the moments when she stiffens, when Barry's familiar touch happens in a moment when she wasn't paying attention. She almost imperceptibly flinches away. Sometimes Barry doesn't notice, if he's caught up in what he's saying. Other times he casually shifts away, his gaze always going to Dennis, as if asking if he had just imagined it.

Dennis doesn't like it. Doesn't like that he had started to look for her. Doesn't like that his eyes trace the places she would be. Isn't sure when he even began. It was harmless, so completely harmless. Polite acknowledgement of his existence wrapped up in a quiet hello he always managed to return. But Dennis knew from experience his attention could stain.

He knows he's not to be trusted.

He notices the first time she straightened up, couldn't quite keep his hands from fixing. Sees the look she and Barry share, silently mocking, not malicious, but it's there. Barry's strange older brother who doesn't know how to have fun.

Dennis is drawn in and it worries him. Drawn to the added life within these walls. It's another breath of laughter on days when Barry would be alone. It's warmer. Unnerving.

Her gaze doesn't always drop now, when it meets his.

Sometimes it holds. Sometimes for half a moment it smiles.

He doesn't trust those soft, full eyes.

He kept away, always he kept away. Until she had stepped in his room for the quiet it offered, trailed her fingers across his carefully laid plans.

She had interrupted him.

And she was doing it again.

**** 

"So, uh, how long have you known Jade?"

Dennis had moved, was leaning against his desk, arms folded over his chest. His shirt looked soft, light grey and long-sleeved, his skin was warm against it. Casey had gotten too used to him in his careful, button down clothes. He looked younger, bigger if possible. His hair was cropped too short to really know what color it would be, but she couldn't imagine it being anything other than dark.

She watched his shoulders move in a slight shrug.

"About eight years."

Casey didn't know if she was surprised or not. On one hand, that was a long time, on the other, Barry had grown up with Jade, and Dennis had only met her some years before.

"She seems nice. You were right, I guess, about some people take getting to know?"

Those shoulders moved again, "It's what she said about me."

She could tell instantly he hadn't meant to say that. His eyes blinked rapidly and he looked away, lips tensing.

Casey did the only thing she could think to, completely ignored it. "She and Hedwig get along really well, with Barry too. It's nice."

…silence.

"He looks up to you, you know, Hedwig does?"

Dennis still wasn't looking at her. "He shouldn't."

It was a simple, quiet mutter, and Casey frowned.

"Dennis. Are you okay?" Her questioned held unanswered a single moment. Casey wondered why she had even asked it. She never asked people that.

She felt it when his gaze snapped back on her, that physical brush of something dark that she didn't understand.

There was a force contained in some people, a volatile energy that broke out in different ways. For some it was their mouths, explosive words uncontained. Others their hands, fists that beat energy into the patched drywall of their homes.

For Dennis, it was his eyes.

"I'm fine."

They both knew it was a lie. But Casey didn't call him out on it. She stared into that brief glimpse of darkness and thought maybe she understood. Casey wouldn't ask him to break his secrets.

Heaven knew she wouldn't be breaking hers.


	6. Woken

She left the quiet room a few minutes later, going out as Jade hollered goodbye. She was taking Hedwig to Patricia's, would watch him there for the night. Hedwig hugged her tight and managed to squeeze a smile out of Casey. Jade waved with a "see ya 'round."

Then the only sound was the television that Barry clicked off. Casey did not complain when he went to bed uncharacteristically early. She shuffled back down the hall past a closed door, not even realizing she had left her cellphone on the counter.

**** 

Her alarm didn't go off. At least not in her room it didn't, and Casey slept later than she ever thought she could. It was almost eleven when she grumbled her way down the hall. She remembered where she had left her phone just in time to realize it wasn't there. Her scowl was short lived when she spotted it on the coffee table in the living room. Barry or someone must have moved it.

She pocketed it without paying it much mind.

Barry came home about 15 minutes later, he had a break between classes and his smile was a little tired.

"hiya Case. I don't know what it was, but I could just not sleep last night."

He put a pot of coffee on, talking over his shoulder, "How bout you?"

Casey chose not to answer. She knew why she couldn't sleep last night.

She pulled out her phone, wanting to check her email, the usual job sites. She entered the passcode incorrectly the first time and sighed a little.

When it told her she was incorrect a second time, Casey full on growled.

"Hey, isn't that Dennis's phone?"

Barry was setting coffee in front of her, eyeing the device in her hand.

"No, it's," Casey looked at the phone and frowned. It was missing the scratch she had somehow already managed to get across her screen. "We must have the same phone."

Casey had gotten a refurbished older model. She hadn't even realized it looked like Dennis's.

She looked to where she was almost certain she had left her phone, seeing its absence in a whole other light.

"Do you think he took mine?"

Barry shrugged, "probably."

He stirred cream into his cup as Casey frowned. "Well does he need this? For work?"

Barry shrugged again, "probably," he relented at Casey's look. "I'm not sure, but he might. I can try to take it to him if I have time before class."

Casey sighed a little, "No, that's okay. but thanks. I was going out anyway. Where does he work?"

Surprisingly Casey realized it was the first time she had ever wondered. She had assumed some sort of office, from the clothes. Barry's elbows left the counter as he straightened.

"His schedule is on the side of the fridge, case I ever need to find him. There should be an address."

It wasn't exactly the answer Casey was expecting, but Barry hid a yawn behind a fist and stepped away. "I'm gonna finish that project before class."

Casey got ready quickly, still not having much of a wardrobe to choose from. She didn't mind, but half wondered if maybe she should try and get some new clothes. Barry might notice she only had three shirts. She still had savings, but she wanted another job first.

The schedule on the fridge was blocked out in weeks with addresses next to each one. She jotted it down easily, and left the cool apartment.

She didn't recognize the address, couldn't look it up on a phone she couldn't unlock, and Casey hailed a cab.

It was several blocks over, but not too terribly far, when the cab stopped. Casey stared out the window.

This was it? It was an office building like she was expecting, but it was in the middle of construction.

Frames of cement and scaffolding midst orange vested men and heavy machinery, with a coming soon sign out front, covered in dirt.

Casey got out, seeing the cab driver's impatience, and stood more than a little confused.

Dennis worked… here?

One of the construction workers noticed her. It was an older man, worn features that looked pleasant enough. "Hey sweetie, you alright?"

Casey met the man at the orange safety netting that surrounded the site.

"I'm looking for someone. His name is Dennis?"

Casey didn't like the look that crossed the man's face. "Why, uh, you lookin' for him?"

"I just have to drop something off."

He looked almost like he didn't believe her, and Casey shifted. "It won't take long."

Why was he being so hesitant? She watched him sigh a little, pull his radio from his belt,

"Hey, get Crumb out here. In front. He's got a visitor."

Casey told herself not to blush, to wait as the man replaced the radio, heard the cackle of the response that Dennis was coming. The man stepped back.

"I gotta get back to work, honey, but you just wait here. And if you need anything else, you just holler, alright?"

Casey thanked him, wondering at the concern that lingered. Nothing about this visit so far had made any sense.

And it was only getting worse.

She didn't recognize him.

The man that approached couldn't _be_ Dennis. He was filthy. Dark red flannel covered in drywall dust. Heavy blue jeans with dirt on the knees. Only his size made sense, and even that was stretched, rougher than normal. The shadow of his safety helmet shaded his features into a mask she couldn't see. He looked big and rough and a little bit too… Casey didn't know what, but she felt suddenly warm.

He didn't speak until he had stepped past the orange fencing, removed his helmet and set it on a fence post. He pulled a yellow handkerchief from his pocket, used it to wipe the dirt from his hands.

When his gaze met her, it was anger.

" _What are you doing here._ " Latent hostility had Casey's eyes widening, blinking rapidly in the dust filled air, confused.

"…I have your phone."

There wasn't any way he heard her over the din of the machinery. She dug into her back, trying not to look at those eyes, wondering had she missed something? She held the phone out with a hand that wasn't entirely steady.

"You left it. I think you took mine. I didn't know. If you needed it."

Stare. Stare. Stare. A too controlled breath. He reached out and took the phone.

"Yours would be in my locker."

Casey was shaking her head, "I don't need it back yet. I just-"

Dennis pocketed the phone. Folded the handkerchief with too much care. When his gaze slipped up to hers again it had not eased a single aching inch.

"Don't ever come here again."

**** 

Casey walked home. She didn't understand. Had she done something wrong? Barry hadn't said she couldn't go, hadn't warned her that Dennis might get so…

_Don't ever come here again._

Casey was no stranger to anger. She had faced its explosive, corrosive force too many times. This was different.

This was _control_ , layered coal beneath unburning eyes. He had been furious and so completely dismissive that Casey was left feeling scolded, wondering why she hadn't been afraid.

Casey always shrank from anger filled eyes. But Casey hadn't curled from his in fear.

It felt like shame.

Like she had done something she shouldn't have. She had been trying to help. Why had he been like… that?

She huddled into herself of she walked, confusion turning in her empty stomach.

It was a long walk through cold wind.

****

Barry had left a mess in the apartment. Scraps of paper from a hurried finish to an art project he never could seem to be satisfied with. Dishes in the sink. Her own coffee mug still rested on the counter.

With a sigh, Casey set to work. She couldn't explain the care she took. Everything was moved with a forced, unconfident precision. She wanted to get this right. Spotless and perfect for when he came home. A silent apology.

Some other day, if her thoughts had been warm and Casey more alert, she may have grown angry. Wondered why she should feel sorry when she hadn't done a thing wrong. But that energy only came in spurts. There was only so many times that Casey could rail that it just wasn't fair, and she didn't want to waste one on this. She tried to reserve them, use them for other people. The ones who deserved them.

She headed to her room, headphones in, a movie pulled up on phone. She wanted to simply pass the minutes until bed. She didn't hear Barry, or the others come in. She let the next queued movie play automatically. She fell asleep with the credits rolling.

****

She woke to darkness and panicked breath. Dreams laced with acidic memories burned in her throat. _I'm all you have left, caseybear. Be nice to me or I might not want you anymore._

She clawed at her sleeping bag, forcing it off of her, to give her room to breathe. She reached for her lamp before remembering. Shadows closed in and Casey wanted out.

Her footsteps were echoes in the quiet hall, each pacing against her heart beat, sounding like someone followed behind. She told herself to get over it, to stop being childish. She was far too old to still be afraid of the dark.

But it wasn't the dark she was afraid of. It was the secrets the shadows held.

She got a drink from the kitchen, setting her cup on the counter. Her feet were cold on the tile floor and Casey tiptoed into the living room, arms folded around her waist.

Casey thought maybe she should watch something. She could keep the volume low, it shouldn't disturb the others, and Casey did not want to go back to sleep.

She wasn't paying attention when she neared the couch, didn't see the coffee table til she had walked right into it. The dull thumb didn't match the explosion of pain in her shin and Casey stumbled back, biting back a grunt.

Later she would wonder how she hadn't noticed, how she hadn't _seen_ him. She would think about this moment, and still not be entirely sure what had happened.

Shadows moved and something gripped her. She felt herself being wrenched back against something hard, unforgiving. The sound that came out of her was choked terror until the heat of a hand covered her mouth. She was shoved down, pressed onto the couch, a body looming forcibly over her.

Casey had learned long ago not to struggle but she her thoughts were still thick with sleep and confusion. This shouldn't be happening _here._ She fought, hands pressing against unmoving heat. A thought began in her mind, spinning into chaos. _He had found her. He had found her_.

Her scream was muffled against the hand that covered it, shoved back into her throat and Casey felt hot tears of anger slide from her eyes into her hair at her temple. Casey couldn't breathe.

A light clicked on.

"DENNIS WHAT THE HELL."

It didn't make sense, _nothing_ made sense. Dennis broke away from her, blank eyes blinking into startled horror. Jade was pulling her off of the couch, away from the man who _couldn't_ be the shadow who had choked her. He couldn't be.

But Jade was screaming at him in disgusted anger and Barry was coming down the hall. Tears still fell from Casey's eyes and she felt her body begin to tremble against the irate woman who still held her protectively back.

Then Barry was demanding what was going on, and Jade was telling him what Casey still didn't accept and all the while Dennis sat, staring at his hands. He looked up when Barry spoke his name, asking if it was true.

He couldn't seem to look at his brother. His gaze drew to the place Casey stood, and his eyes held a look Casey had never seen before.

Cold regret.

"Casey…" It was the start of a failed explanation and an aching apology. Too soft a mutter to come after angry explosive voices, and all Casey's stupid, paralyzed mind could think was that it was the first time Dennis had ever spoken her name.

Jade drew her back, turning her towards the hall. "Let's let Barry deal with this."

Casey let herself be led. She couldn't think when nothing made sense. She didn't _want_ to.

Casey didn't want to be afraid. Casey didn't want to cry.

****

Jade was kind. Dimly, from that numb place in her mind, Casey recognized how good the woman really was with people. Intentionally comforting, touching without crowding. She stayed in Casey's room and talked just enough to keep Casey's ears from straining to hear anything coming down the hall. Casey was remarkably calm. Until an hour had passed and Jade stood to go, to let her get some sleep. Then one question ripped out of Casey in a childish, aching voice.

"Why did he do that?"

She hadn't meant to speak it, to have the whisper reach Jade, but the woman stopped, sending Casey a frank, tired look.

"Not gonna lie, girl. I've got no idea. Dennis has never made sense to me, but I've never seen..." she shrugged, "Barry'll talk to him. And we'll both personally help find you a new place if you want it. You don't have to stay anywhere if you feel unsafe."

She meant it as a comfort.

Casey was suddenly terrified all over again.

****

She stepped out the next morning. Dennis was in the hall. There was no thought before she was stumbling back. Fear began to leak into her eyes. It was an instinctive reaction, like a hand jerking away from a hot stove.

He was frozen, his gaze meeting hers and it locked Casey in place. Briefly Casey recalled the stories, of predators that could paralyze prey with their gaze. For one agonizing moment it felt like that. Like she had stepped into a vacuum and the life was pulled from her lungs and Casey just _couldn't move._

This was different than fear. This was certainty that if Dennis wanted to be, he was a force she could never escape.

Her uncle was bull, rampant destruction to anything in its path. Dennis was too much focus to move with anything other than intent, and she watched the strength in that body coil and shift.

"Casey…" he took a half step forward, winced at the way Casey's shoulder flinched back, knocking into her door. "I didn't, I never intended to…"

Her hands found the handle. The last thing she saw before stepping back and letting her door swing solidly closed was his face settling into rigid lines of resignation.


	7. Why

Barry stayed beside Casey, hanging out and talking. Casey suspected he was skipping class, staying to make sure she was okay. It would be annoying if it wasn't so sweet. She knew Barry was going to school on a scholarship, that missing class could affect his grades and make him lose his scholarship. She knew he was doing well enough that there wasn't any real jeopardy, but it was nice, when she got over the guilt, that he was willing to do that to make sure she was okay. She let herself settle far closer to him than normal, soaking up the constant warmth. Right now it was the easiest way to feel stable.

He didn't seem to mind. Even dropped an arm over her shoulders when a movie he liked came on tv. He joked that it was his way of making her watch the whole thing. The movie was, in his words, "so stupid it was funny." Casey never really saw how the movie made it to the second half of the statement.

But it was mindless and Barry was warm and carefully attentive in a way that clued Casey in that maybe he understood. It reminded her of how Jade had been, made her wonder if their foster parents had raised them to understand people. Barry reached sometimes when he shouldn't, and lacked some boundaries with surprising ease, but it was obvious he cared about other's comfort. It was obvious in the careful way he half held her that Barry cared about her, and Casey warmed at the thought, at the little glow of foolish pride when she realized she had made a friend.

For one insane moment Casey was tempted to call her uncle and tell him he was _wrong_. The burst of sharp laughter left her a bit abruptly and had Barry looking from her to the scene on the tv that even he didn't think was funny.

"Seriously, you laugh at that?"

Casey rolled her eyes, and lifted a hand to turn his face back towards the tv.

"Shut up, Barry," she tucked her knees up and settled in beside him. She heard Barry huff good-naturedly,

"If you say so, babygirl."

**** 

Casey did not see Dennis for three days.

She did not know how it was possible. They lived in the same apartment but his existence had been carefully removed from her own.

It was surreal. Barry had tried talking to her. Apologizing a thousand times. The only explanation he had was he thought maybe Dennis was sleep walking.

He didn't sound convinced.

He kept asking if she was okay. If she wanted to leave. He would help, they wouldn't be offended. It was enough for Casey to realize that fear wasn't an option anymore. She needed to get over it. Barry could read it in her eyes and his concern was going to convince him that Casey needed to leave.

But she didn't have anywhere else to go.

Here was still her only option. So with Barry Casey was firm; she didn't want to go anywhere.

Barry didn't seem to understand. Barry wanted to push. Jade had had to leave the next morning, and Casey could see the half-panicked concern hit Barry when he knew he would be alone to deal with this.

Casey didn't know how to tell him that there was nothing to deal with.

Casey was fine.

The sooner they moved on to pretending nothing had happened, the better it would be.

Barry didn't seem to get that, and Casey was quickly learning what it felt like to be annoyed with someone's concern. It felt like being a terrible person.

But Casey hated the awkward, strained silence. The way Barry pretended Dennis's absence wasn't completely conspicuous. It was cutting into Barry's bright energy and Casey was missing the force of his laughter.

Hedwig hadn't been over either. Casey wondered if Patricia was just better, or if the boy was being kept away. It was ridiculous. If they weren't going to deal then they needed to quit tiptoeing around. You couldn't half face something. You either had to deal with it, or pretend it didn't exist.

Dennis's philosophy seemed to be the latter, ignoring Casey's entire existence. Barry was caught in between, and by the end of the third evening Casey was wondering why she hadn't gotten a say.

All she had was Barry's stuttered attempts to explain what he didn't even understand.

And Casey couldn't prove she was fine when Dennis wasn't even there. Casey wasn't afraid anymore, she was angry.

The only reason she hadn't gone completely insane was the responses she finally had to some job searches. She had an interview at a local coffee shop. It was small. Upscale with vegan and organic options, the very last place her uncle would _ever_ step foot. She could prepare for it, fit it in to her empty schedule and pretend it gave her something to do.

She walked to the coffee shop the day before her interview, to see how long it would take. To be at least a little bit familiar so her nerves wouldn't stand completely on end. It took twelve minutes. She refused to think about that she had all but passed the coffee shop days before on her walk home from Dennis's work. She was home again in just half an hour.

It was obvious they weren't expecting her to be home so soon. She stepped into the kitchen and saw him.

Dennis looked locked in thought, body held in exhausted dejection. His hands were braced on the edge of the counter, arms straight, shoulders hunched and head hanging. His face turned at the sound of her footsteps, and he caught sight of her, frozen in the door way.

He pushed off from the counter with a sharp inhalation of surprise, body straightening as he faced her, face set and eyes too wide.

Casey stood blinking at him. She didn't know where her anger was. Couldn't seem to find it. Call it surprise. Call it being too used to it all. Casey faced the man whose hands had threatened without warning or explanation and felt a bitter kind of numb.

"Casey…" He stopped at the cold look Casey could _feel_ taking over her face. He wasn't the only one who got to have walls. He wasn't the only one who got to hide.

"Barry's made it clear it's better if I stay away. I didn't know you were here."

His hands raked over the skin of his head in agitation, and Casey felt herself locking down. Don't feel, don't care, don't react. _Don't be weak_.

She watched him speak with practiced control. "Just… I'm sorry."

He went to move, to step away and fall back out of view and Casey's anger rekindled. He didn't get to just talk and then walk away.

Casey was no stranger to wanting to rail at the hands that had hurt her, to want to scream until her lungs bled but there was always that little voice of learned logic telling her it would only invite more pain. Yelling would only turn those hands on her again.

Dimly Casey wondered why that little voice looked at the man across from her now, and held completely silent.

"Why did you do it, Dennis."

Casey wasn't loud, but the hiss of anger was clear and Dennis drew up, turning slowly to face her. She watched his hands fist, then move behind his back. His gaze lowered as he accepted her anger.

"I didn't do anything to you. I'm sorry for showing up at your work, or whatever, but that doesn't mean you get to-"

His head came up, his eyes silencing her, careful expression barely masking the broken one beneath.

"No. _No_ , Casey."

Each word was a forcible rebuttal, hung on an accent that had deepened. It had curled over building, unsteady emotion. Casey swallowed a little, stepping back, wondering if Dennis had a gaze that wasn't capable of drilling through iron. Her anger was blending with an odd type of fear, the kind you get when you face a force you don't understand

"No, you didn't do anything. Even if you had, I would _never_ ," he broke off, his voice evening out, "I wouldn't intentionally harm you."

Dennis's look was an oath of regret, promising he would never do what he had already done, and Casey didn't understand.

"Then _why_." She hated the way her voice wavered. She had seen anger move without cause a thousand times before. Hands didn't _need_ a reason to do what they did. But she wanted there to be one.

She wanted proof that people could be different, that escaping was worth it because there was _something_ else out there to find. She wanted there to be an explanation for the anger, she needed to see control.

She watched his chest move with intentionally even breath.

"Sometimes I have nightmares."

**** 

Dennis had thought he hadn't heard the foreman right. He didn't get visitors. But there was someone waiting at the front and the man didn't seem pleased. Dennis's only guess was that it must be Barry.

He had seen her as soon as he stepped outside, felt the looks of the men who watched him walk towards the girl that looked young enough to be their daughter, and old panic had pulled on his mind.

Dennis had a reputation. Earned five years ago on a night forever drilled into his mind. The guys had gone out for a drink after work, convinced Dennis to come. He would never agree to go but Barry had been pushing him to at least _try_ and have some fun.

So he had tried. He drank, and found the single spot on the bar he could stare at that wasn't dirty. He drank and regretted going out every single second. Until the girl had taken the seat beside him. She had brushed against his arm, earning his attention. Trailed her fingers across his forearm when she told him her name. Smiled in a way even Dennis could understand.

It hadn't taken him long to get lost. She was bright and fun and pressed up against him before he even considered what was going on. She tasted like Jack and sunshine and something that made him forget every ounce of common sense until her brother showed up and pulled him off of her.

Dennis hadn't known she was underage.

There were shouts, screamed accusations. The girl began to cry, the men from his job stepping in in time to hear every sordid detail of Dennis and the underage girl. The cops were threatened but never called, but word traveled anyway.

Dennis was called into the office the next day. They couldn't fire him for something outside of work but they made it very clear if they heard of _anything_ else happening, he was done. Final warning.

Dennis hadn't touched a drop of alcohol since.

He faced the looks, the stares, the blatant hostility from men who had tolerated his presence with friendliness before. It had been five years but there were things hardened men never forgot. Every new hire was told the story, warned to keep an eye on Crumb.

There were comments forming before he even reached her.

"Man, Crumb, you really do like em young."

"Is she even legal?"

The _only_ thing that made him speak to her at all was the fear that something had happened to her or Barry.

And she was here over a cellphone.

Simple concern that she might have something he needed and she had gone out of her way to return it.

She didn't know what she was risking coming here.

It could get him fired.

He needed her gone, out of view of the stares that could end everything he worked for.

He had made it into the locker room in the work trailer before his hands began to shake.

_He couldn't lose this job._

What would Barry do? Rent and his schooling took up almost all of Dennis's pay, he _couldn't_ lose this job.

_What you touch breaks, Dennis, the world would be a lot safer if you just stopped touching._

Echoes of words he could never quite forget got set on repeat in his mind and Dennis stared at the phone as it shook in his whitened hands.

There was a sharp bang on the trailer door, and Dennis jolted.

"Crumb! Get out here!"

Dennis stood. He did what he had to and he stood. His phone went in his locker next to his careful change of clothes, and he locked his thoughts down.

This job took everything, every piece of concentration and he _had_ to stay focused.

Stay focused not to feel the dust, to force his eyes to stare at nothing and not see. Five years in and Dennis had learned, the thoughts would never end to fix, to fix, _to fix_ , but he could stop his hands. If you faced the same raging, overwhelming need too often you could be panicked and bored at the same time. It ate away at him every exhausting day, but it was the only job he could find. Dennis had never finished high school. A thirty-two-year-old man with no finished education was not someone anyone wanted to hire.

It was a job that made life with Barry possible and Dennis would not let his brother down. He couldn't do that again.

So Dennis did what he had to, and went back to work.

*** 

End of shift and he reached his locker.

It was open.

Carefully folded clothes thrown on the ground. Filthy boots had ground sawdust into the seams.

He'd seen it before, five years ago. They had been waiting then, for his reaction.

He wouldn't give them the satisfaction.

He didn't break.

**** 

Barry had looked startled when he came home in his work clothes. The concern in his eye had asked questions Dennis wouldn't answer.

He stayed tall til he reached the bathroom.

The pads of his fingers scraped across the skin of his chest as he forcibly removed his shirt, feeling the rough edge of the faded scars beneath.

He couldn't destroy these clothes when he didn't have the money to replace them. He folded each piece ignoring the nausea that rolled in his stomach.

Scalding water pounded his skin raw before it got it clean.

He remembered Jade was coming over when Barry knocked on the door with clothes for him he had forgotten to grab. Sometimes Barry paid more attention than Dennis gave him credit for.

He dressed in the receding steam and let himself think he could stay there. Because Jade would be in his room.

Very briefly he thought of the door at the end of the hall, the quiet room for the quiet girl.

Maybe she would let him in.

But he'd seen the drawn confusion at the anger in his eye when she had shown him simple kindness. He didn't get too ask anything of her.

So he did what he had to, and gave up his seclusion with all the appearance of even calm.

**** 

Night came and pretense faded. Shadows fell and Dennis fractured. Dreams held memories reality convinced were forgotten. Taunting moments and childish fear.

He didn't remember waking. He didn't remember moving. All he remembered was the fear in her eyes when the lights snapped on and she was pinned beneath him.

How had his hands done that.

Why did he have to hurt.

Her fear had drilled into him in that panicked hall.

Now she faced him with anger he knew he deserved, his only explanation pathetic. It sounded like an excuse. But it was the only one he had to give.

He watched her anger dissolve behind surprise, and her eyes soften with something Dennis couldn't understand.

**** 

Casey swallowed. _Sometimes I have nightmares._ The quiet admittance drove out her anger with a force that left her feeling a little bit bereft.

"What of?" Her voice was harder than it should be, holding the curious and too little concern, But Casey's emotions were wary of getting too close to anything that would truly make her feel. It was safer to step back entirely. But something pushed her just a little forward.

He shifted, and she could almost _watch_ him make the decision to choose honesty.

"My brother."

His eyes held an answer to the question her lips didn't need to ask but they moved anyway.

"Kevin?"

He flinched visibly at the name, a sharper emotion than Casey had yet to see from him and it chinked away at the wall of her unconcern. She found herself speaking so he didn't have to.

"Barry told me, that he lost his brother, when you were kids."

Dennis nodded once, steel forming in his jaw. He straightened, determined.

"Did he tell you it was my fault?"


	8. After

Casey wondered if she should be feeling something. Horror? Compassionate shame? She just blinked at Dennis in a numb bubble and watched him blink back, completely cold.

Almost casual.

Like they were discussing the weather that Casey never did manage to bring up.

"They were younger," Dennis stated, "I was supposed to be watching them."

"And you weren't?" The callous question made Casey a little afraid for her own soul at that moment, but Dennis merely looked back at her.

"I thought I was."

Their gazes weren't moving, locked together and refusing to break. It was a battle of hardened calm and Casey refused to lose.

"How did he die."

If she was listening in, she wondered, would she hate herself? That cold voice, the complete lack of care?

"He fell. Cut himself. It got infected."

It was the surprise that go to her. A cut? That was so… simple. They lost their brother to an infection?

"And he died?" Her gaze held but her voice broke into a whisper, and she watched it shift the control in Dennis's eye. He swallowed, looking away as his arms uncrossed and his hands were shoved agitatedly into his pockets.

"Yes."

The sound of the front door shutting and Casey jumped. Barry reached the kitchen and his anger was sharp and immediate.

"Dennis, what's the deal man, I told you to leave her alone!"

Casey watched Dennis shift back obediently, send her a look that held in a blank depth, and simply step away. As if his words weren't blaring on repeat in Casey's mind. As if a thousand questions weren't chasing their way down the hallway after him, demanding an explanation.

Casey turned, forcibly walking right into Barry. He hugged her almost instinctively, pulling her tight into the warmth she thought might make the tremors stop.

"Babygirl, he didn't scare you again, did he?" Quiet concern mingled with confusion and dread, and Casey shook her head against the care in his voice.

"No, we were just talking."

His sigh of relief was almost sweet. Barry couldn't stand thinking ill of his brother.

*******

Knowing Dennis was home didn't change the fact that he was virtually nonexistent all afternoon. He stayed behind a closed door. Casey's thoughts ran in a rampant stream of mixed anger and self-disgusted guilt. She had been so calloused, so cold. What kind of person could act like that? When Barry had told her about Kevin, her concern had come instantly, acknowledgment that he had faced pain. Kevin was Dennis's brother too. And she hadn't even said she was sorry.

What was _wrong_ with her?

*****

Barry cooked and Casey cleaned up after. If Barry noticed the extra care she took, he didn't say anything.

She tried not to be obvious as she waited for Barry to get ready for bed. She had her interview tomorrow and really should be caring about getting some sleep herself, but that was the furthest thing from Casey's mind.

Finally Barry's call of "Good night!" echoed in the hall, the sound of his door closing signaling silence. The lights were off but for the small light over the sink, and Casey stood sipping her water beside it.

She told herself she wasn't waiting, but Dennis had opened a subject and her brain couldn't _not_ think about those words, bouncing against her skull like a screen saver.

Minutes ticked by. There was a sound in the hall. Her heart lurched when a shadow stretched from the hall, her body on edge in the stilted silence. It still beat too fast when Dennis stepped into view.

He stopped when he saw her, his gaze even and resigned in the angled shadows of the kitchen.

Casey wondered if he could see her pulse. Were her eyes too wide? Her lips unsteady as they held a breath apart? She wasn't afraid. She was _nervous_. She had made a decision with an uncertain outcome and now part of her wondered if this was a mistake.

Dennis turned to leave.

"Wait!" her voice was too loud and Casey winced, watching his shoulders freeze, move to turn his body back to face hers. "I, I just wanted to say I was sorry."

His expression faltered with confusion, his frown deepening with his eyes.

"About your brother," Casey whispered, "I should have said that, before."

A hesitant pause, as if he was processing, then he nodded once in acknowledgement. She watched those shoulders shift again, turning away, and Casey was taking a half step forward.

"Barry doesn't blame you."

It was almost fascinating to watch, the way he turned back, direct physical focus. His eyes were cold. Dimly Casey wondered what it would take to get Dennis to break.

"He wouldn't say it."

Casey frowned at his casual denial, wondering if he really believed that, if he spent his days considering in the back of his mind that his brother held him responsible for their brother's death. Part of her wondered how anyone could live like that. But Casey had long since learned you could live with just about anything.

"Barry thinks I should leave." She didn't really know what to say, and was just selecting thoughts as they passed by.

He flinched, just barely, a tiny break of expression, "Maybe he's right."

Casey frowned, "I don't want to. And I shouldn't _have to_."

Steel blue eyes lowered, "What if it isn't safe here?"

Casey had to resist the ridiculous urge to laugh. He didn't know what unsafe was.

"Am I really not safe with you, Dennis?" Bitter disregard in a too loud voice and she watched him begin to study her, careful eyes tracking across her face, and Casey realized. This wasn't how normal people responded. She wasn't doing this right.

But at the moment she really didn't care. She wasn't normal and he could get the hell over it.

None of this was going like she had expected, like she had rehearsed in her mind as Barry talked over dinner. She'd say she was sorry and he would say something inane like "It happened a long time ago," and that polite exchange would put them back on simple ground. Like nothing had happened, and the world would move on.

But Dennis wasn't playing by the rules. So Casey stopped playing too.

"What happened at your job?" She bit out the sudden question, wanting to know. He hadn't been dreaming then. That was intentional anger.

Dennis frowned, his arms crossing as his body shifted. Brow hovering in a way that asked if she was really sure she wanted to have this conversation.

Casey stared him down. She didn't know where it was coming from, this irrational desire to push stone. She squared off and watched a little amazed when Dennis relented.

"I'm not good, Casey."

Casey's scoff echoed off of the tile, and her arms folded to match his, "You're going to have to do better than that."

***** 

Dennis didn't understand what was happening. She was a force that kept building and relenting in completely unpredictable ways. The ice in her eyes couldn't hold without melting with the heat of sudden anger that died just as quickly away. She was a breath of reactive energy, chipping his defenses down then shoring them up with every calloused look. Dennis felt battered; she was shifting his footing and he wasn't sure how to stand.

Her fear was destructive but could be understood. Her anger fit what his hands had done. The soft apology didn't belong. He hadn't been prepared for that.

Now she was demanding explanations with a force that couldn't hold. It was like Casey was trying to be strong. Like Casey had confused hardness and strength.

Dennis understood. He couldn't always be strong but Dennis could always be hard. He already knew he didn't get to be anything else. His role had been established in life.

There were a thousand other things Casey deserved to be. Life shouldn't have stripped her of possibilities already. She was young, and alive and deserved choices, chances to be anything she wanted to be. Like Barry did.

_You ruin everything, Dennis. Your brothers would be here if it weren't for you!_

Every day was a conscious effort not to drag Barry down.

He thought he could choose the people he would affect. Barry had family apart from him, Dennis could help without hurting. Casey never should have been close enough to touch. Turns out just being near him was enough to be caught in that downward spiral.

She had seemed happy here. Dennis had ruined that.

Now she was standing here angry because she didn't want to have to leave just because Dennis had screwed up.

"There was an incident, a few years ago. It involved a girl that I didn't know was underage. I got in trouble. When they saw you..." he sighed, "I don't want to lose that job."

******

Casey stared at Dennis, blinking. Somehow every word sounded like an understatement. Her thoughts broke off in separate tangents and spiraled down completely different paths.

Dennis had been involved with an underaged girl.

They thought she was with Dennis.

She had almost gotten him fired.

_Dennis was involved with an underaged girl._

"I didn't know." It was like he read the thought behind her eye, wanted to defend himself but half seemed to think he didn't deserve it.

"How did it happen?"

Short concise sentences told her what had happened that night at the bar. Shame ate away at the edge of his gaze, but his voice wouldn't waver.

"How long ago was that?" Casey asked, quietly, curious.

"Five years."

"Have you done anything sinc-"

" _No_."

Casey couldn't doubt him. He stood tense, but still compliant, and her thoughts turned over. She hadn't realized she was stepping forwards until Dennis's gaze zeroed in on the movement. Casey froze, her voice leaving her in a bare whisper, "They held that over you for five years?"

There was a little voice, inside Casey, taking over her thoughts.

It wasn't fair.

She had to admit, it frightening her a little, the way his eyes widened in a half breath of shock. the way he shifted back as if physically stung by a whisper that almost hadn't reached him. Casey realized that couldn't be all of it. There was more to the story than the dry facts he shared.

Five years spent working with men who despised him for a single mistake that anyone could have made. Five years spent to blame.

Casey knew what it was like to see judgment behind the casual eye, the exchange of glances as she passed. To hear the silence of suddenly ceased conversations that screamed that they had been whispering about her.

She wondered what Dennis had faced at work.

She remembered, the mistrusting look in the eye of the man at the job site, instantly assuming Dennis was up to something despicable, so ready to assume the worse. The image of Dennis, covered in dirt and weary anger filled Casey's mind, and her mouth was moving before her thoughts caught up.

"Why do you still work there? You can't like it, it's... dirty." A simple word but when it came to Dennis it was more than enough reason. She watched black shame fill his eye. This was different than before, when he hated what he had done. This was an understanding of worthlessness. It was a look Casey knew just a little too well.

"I never graduated. From highschool. It's the only job I can get."

Casey's eyes went wide as her thoughts expanded. He was stuck there. Dennis couldn't bare when the remote was out of place. His room was beyond pristine. Somehow he spent everyday covered in dirt.

"How do you stand it?" her whisper was low but it didn't matter, it didn't have to go far. Casey had moved again. She was standing just in front of his place by the counter, staring up at an unbreakable expression.

"Because I have to."

It was the words that closed off everything. She knew in that moment that Dennis was done talking. She turned before he could, remembering he had come out to the kitchen for a reason, and walked away.

*******

"Good luck today, babygirl."

Casey accepted Barry's hug with a smile. Her interview was in an hour and she was unsuccessfully trying to hold off the nerves. Barry was headed to his part time job before class, and Casey wouldn't see him until after.

Barry hadn't made it out the door before Dennis came down the hall. He had off that day, and Casey watched Barry's eyes narrow in disgruntled rebuke.

Casey's voice lurched out of her. "GoodmorningDennis!"

It held obvious forced brightness and she had gotten it all out in a breath. Barry was blinking at her in surprise, but she really needed Barry to get over this.

They couldn't stand on tiptoe in a home they all shared. They couldn't treat Dennis like a threat when Casey couldn't find it in herself to be afraid.

She needed to break the silence, and she watched Dennis turn to face her.

His gaze was cool, but it held just a touch of something warm, "Good morning, Casey."

"Okaaaay," Barry drug it out, gaze switching between the two before Dennis fixed him with a look and his brow quirked.

"You're gonna be late for work."

Barry aggressively rolled his eyes, then sent Casey a quick smile, "You're gonna do great. Text me and let me know how it goes."

He waved over his shoulder, grabbing his jacket and keys, coming back for his coffee, almost forgetting his bag, before finally making it out the door. Casey was still shaking her head in amusement when the apartment fell silent. Barry just _looked_ like scattered thought some days.

She didn't mean to catch Dennis's gaze. She had been intending to play this cool, but sometimes she just didn't know how _not_ to be awkward.

At that point Casey realized she was staring.

She blinking, shaking her gaze free and watched him shift.

"How what goes?"

"Uh, what?" Casey blinked at Dennis in surprise, before recovering. "Oh, I have a job interview today."

"You're getting a second job?"

"What?" And that was the point Casey remembered her lie. Dennis had asked when she moved in if she was employed. She had said yes and his work schedule kept him from noticing that wasn't entirely true. "Well, they let me go…" It wasn't a lie, per se, it had just happened before she moved in here. She watched his eyes consider, accept her statement because there was no reason not to.

"Well… good luck."

"Thanks."

It was exactly the type of awkward conversation Casey had been expecting when she had faced Dennis last night. Now as he stepped into the kitchen, leaving Casey standing in the quiet living room, Casey found herself wondering if she missed the shadows or if she was grateful for the light that chased real conversation away.

*****

Casey stepped out of the little coffee shop, belated nerves still tingling in her stomach. She pulled out her phone and sent Barry a quick text.

_I start Thursday._

She hadn't gone five steps when her phone almost vibrated out of her pocket.

-Congrats!-

-I knew you'd kill it bbygrl-

-we need to celebrate-

-do they have a uniform?-

-we should go shopping. Something sassy chic, to match the atmosphere-

-Jade loves that place shell be so excited-

-gotta get back to work tell me about it when I get home!-

Casey groaned through her smile. Barry singlehandedly was going to blow through her texting plan. But it made her smile, his excitement. Over a minimum wage job at a café. But he was excited for _her_ and it made her a little excited too.

The interview hadn't been difficult, they mostly needed an extra body to clear tables and stock shelves, but Barry's reaction made her happy, grateful.

It was cold on the way home but spring was finally beginning to show up and it would warm up slowly. Walking to work wouldn't be too bad.

She ran some errands, bought a few groceries, enjoyed the day out.

Dennis hadn't been around when she had gotten home, his door was shut and Casey didn't pry. There was a little patch of sunshine slanting in onto the corner cushion of the couch, and Casey curled up with a book.

***** 

Barry came through the door singing. Casey had no idea what song it was supposed to be but he spun into the living room, holding out a box he held with a flourish.

"For you, babygirl!"

Casey peered into the plastic window of the box.

It was a cake, erratically decorated with the words "Congrats Casey!" Spelled out with glitter in the center.

"Wha-" Casey didn't know what to say, as Barry tugged on her hand and pulled her towards the kitchen.

"Come on. Dennis will _kill_ us if we eat this in here."

"If you eat what."

Casey's head turned as Barry pulled her along, seeing Dennis come down the hall. His gaze followed her with a half cocked brow.

Barry didn't stop til she was in the kitchen and her set the box down, opening it proudly, and Casey just stared. There were icing flowers and chocolate drizzles, mashed against cookie crumble and stenciled coloring. One corner was completely white and scraped even. It looked like the party aisle in a convenience store had been deposited onto one cake.

"We had a guest lecturer today in design. We did cakes! We practiced lots of different techniques."

The cake suddenly made a lot more sense.

Dennis came up behind them, was looking at the cake like it was giving him a headache, and Barry gestured towards the white corner.

"That piece is for you."

Casey laughed. She couldn't help it. Barry, a full-grown man had gone to class and come home with an arts and crafts cake to celebrate her getting her job. Yet he had made a point to make one perfectly neat slice so he could share with his brother. It was just so _Barry_ and he beamed when she hugged him and told him it was perfect.

Dennis was standing just off to the side and he spoke quietly when their gazes met.

"You got the job?"

Casey nodded, and watched him nod once in return.

"Good. I'm glad." It was just a little stilted and Casey found herself smiling.

"You're just saying that because now we get cake."

His lips stayed even but his eyes warmed, and Casey figured that meant he was smiling.


	9. Reaching

She was nervous. She kept trying to shake it off, but it was her first time working in a coffee shop and Casey had no idea what she was doing. She tried to remind herself that that was what training was for, that no one knew what they were doing before then. If other people could come in with no knowledge and end up trained then so could she.

She was quiet, following her trainer around and just taking it in. He would ask if she understood, Casey would nod. Did she have any questions? A shake of her head. He gave her a few simple tasks and left her alone, and Casey began to relax.

It wasn't so bad, and when shift ended at 4:30 she made the cold walk home.

The house was quiet and Casey kicked off her shoes, tugging the lanyard they had given her over her head. There wasn't a uniform, just employee badges, and she found herself thinking she may have to take Barry up on his offer to shop for some work clothes.

Her stomach reminded her that she hadn't really eaten as Casey dropped her bag beside her sleeping bag in her room. She heard the door open just as she stepped out towards the kitchen. She didn't think Barry would be home yet, and Casey made her way back down the quiet hall.

Dennis stood in the square, white kitchen, dark slacks and a pale grey button up. Casey eyed him curiously, knowing he was coming from work. She doubted she would soon be forgetting the memory of him in dusty red flannel and work jeans. That image had imposed itself on her memory and she couldn't quite reconcile it with the man she was seeing now. He looked neat, clean… _tired_.

His shoulders were slumped the slightest fraction, his head hanging so his gaze could focus without effort on the cool tile floor. He looked worn, the particular kind of exhausted that Casey felt in the air that hung around him. The kind that didn't look physical.

She shifted, a breath of sound breaking the stillness and Dennis's head came up. She watched him fix his posture, fix the depth of his eyes, and look at her with even regard.

"Hello."

"Hi." Casey couldn't get her gaze to stay still. It kept landing on his and flitting away. She could feel his staying steady.

"How was your first shift?"

Casey blinked a little, surprised Dennis had remembered, "Oh, it was good, you know. Pretty easy. How was yours? I mean," Casey blushed, "I know it wasn't your first, I meant, how was work?"

She hadn't realized her fingers were twisting themselves into the sleeve of her shirt until his gaze fixed on the motioned. She stilled, suddenly mindful of the wrinkles she was putting there, and self-consciously tried to smooth the fabric.

"It was good." He nodded a little, and Casey was speaking too quickly.

"Was it?"

She watched him blink slowly, eyes refocusing, before his shoulder moved and he shifted back a fraction.

"It was a long day."

A quiet admittance but it spoke volumes, and Casey found herself wondering if Dennis was still dealing with the effects of her showing up at his work, if his coworkers were still causing problems. Guilt pooled in her stomach and Casey wrapped her arms around it, trying to stop it from spreading.

"Are you hungry? I, I was about to make something. Barry's been trying to get me to eat salad. I could, would you want some?"

His silence made her start to question if she had really spoken out loud. He was just blinking at her, expression frozen in uncertain surprise. He finally spoke.

"Could I shower first."

"Of course!" Casey could feel the heat pooling in her cheeks for absolutely no reason, "Yeah, I'll just get it started. The salad. I'll start making it."

******* 

He nodded a little, reaching for his bag he had set at his feet, and left the kitchen.

Casey didn't know why she had asked him that. She didn't know what she was thinking. Did Dennis even eat salad? With a huff Casey turned to the fridge and started pulling out vegetables at random. Barry had hit a produce market and returned with a ridiculous amount because "who is he to turn down a good sale," demanding that Casey help him eat all of it before it went bad. After a moment's indecision she grabbed out the pack of chicken. She couldn't imagine just salad would be enough to fill Dennis.

She had the chicken sliced and cooking on the stove while she dug out the other cutting board. She was flipping the kitchen when Dennis reappeared.

He entered quietly, stepping into the kitchen and shifting to stand just beside the counter. His grey slacks had been replaced by black sweatpants, his button down a long sleeved white Tshirt. She watched his fingers find the cuff of his sleeve, begin to roll it up as he nodded to the pile of vegetables on the counter.

"Would you like these cut up?"

Casey didn't know why she was staring. She didn't know why her mouth wasn't working. She just nodded.

She was too used to seeing Dennis in even grey lines of suppressed power. It was like he hid his strength behind neat clothes. Seeing him at work had changed that. It had been a rough look for a rough man that matched that rough edge to his voice, that deepened clip that Barry's voice didn't have. Now he looked like something in-between. Easy strength in comfortable lines, casual control as his fingers straightened each rolled sleeve and his body moved to settle in front of the cutting board.

She watched him move in systematic order, blade chopping with easy precision. She had forgotten he was left handed.

The faint smell of something burning reached Casey's nose.

She started, pulling the pan off of the flame with a short, dismayed cry. With all her staring she hadn't been paying attention and now the underside of the chicken had burned. Staring at the ruined pieces, Casey felt heat pour into her face, and the feeling of failure reached her toes. Why did she have to be such a vacant klutz?

"Something wrong?" Dennis had heard her grumble, caught the frantic movement, and now he was facing her, curious.

"It's burned." Casey wouldn't look at him, wondering if he'd be angry she had messed this up.

***** 

Dennis studied her profile. Her hair hung as a half curtain along her face, but he caught the small mouth twisted in a frown, the flush of heat cresting in her cheeks, the down cast eyes as she stared at the stove in front of her.

"Barry just calls that 'blackened.'"

Eyed blinked in surprise and turned to look at him, her hair shifted and the view of her face cleared. He watched the slightest smile form on her lips.

"Well I hope you like blackened chicken."

Dennis didn't really have words. He managed a nod, turned back to his cutting board before he got too awkward.

He wasn't really sure what was happening. Barry and Case ate together all of the time, but unless Jade or Hedwig was over, Dennis was never a part of it. He didn't mind, so much. Barry was particularly talkative while he ate. He didn't seem to understand that it was counter-productive. Dennis liked his quiet. But Casey's unexpected offer had caught him off guard, pulled at his mind as a simple way to wash the grime of his day away. Casey seemed to recognize the line between needing solitude and not wanting to be alone. Sometimes Dennis wanted to share his quiet. That didn't mean he wanted it broken.

He thought maybe Casey understood.

***** 

Casey got down two bowls, let Dennis divide the salad up. He settled a seat away from her at the counter, didn't speak, but waited until she sat down to begin eating. Casey sat at the stool in the quiet kitchen, Dennis presence taking the edge off of the silence. Her thoughts wandered as she ate, roaming over work, life, and empty random things along a little path that felt like a piece of contentment.

She thanked him when he cleared the dishes, and he stopped, turning to face her with intent she had come to expect.

"Thank you, Casey. This was… nice."

A simple statement, slightly hesitant words, and Casey gave him a soft smile.

"It was."

******

Work passed slower the next day, but Casey found herself enjoying the work somewhat. Still it was nice to get out into the cool air, to make the walk towards home. She was proud of herself. Weeks had passed since she had run away and she had settled in, found work, established herself in a world her uncle couldn't touch. Left the ridged scrapes of the past behind. She was living, not without wariness, but without fear, and for Casey, that was everything.

She was only home a few minutes before Dennis arrived. She heard him move in the hall outside her door, knew the shower would soon kick on. She wondered how she hadn't notice before that Dennis always showered as soon as he came home, couldn't help but be curious what he did with his work clothes. Regardless, thoughts of asking him if he wanted to share dinner again were already practicing their way to her tongue when she heard Barry's voice in the hall, hollering for her to come out.

Casey obediently headed into the hall and was instantly taken by the shoulders and spun in place this way and that as he looked her over and hummed a little to himself. Casey found herself looking down. Her black sweatshirt was baggy over her long white shirt that hung over her leggings.

"I mean," he waved a hand, "It works, but that's because _anything_ would work on you doll. But we're gonna find some things that work _for_ you."

He hooked his arm around her elbow and started escorting her to the door. He was still dressed from being out, black jacket open over his sweater, blue scarf that he unwound from his own neck and casually draped it around hers as he talked.

"There's a sale downtown. I saw it on the way home. We're going."

Casey found herself being drug along, half laughing, half incredulous, gaze lingering just a little down the hall as Barry ushered them both out.

******* 

"The layers… what are you trying to say here?"

Casey looked down. They had been shopping for about 40 minutes, Casey trying to pull Barry away from some of the more outlandish pieces while Barry repeatedly insisted she needed some color in her life. He had finally shooed her into the dressing room and now he was looking her over.

"Well I… like them?" Since leaving most of her wardrobe home, Casey had had to limit what she wore due to lack of options. She was never without one or two layers at home, Barry was now staring at about five.

He was frowning, the over dramatic kind that let her know Barry was about to go on a rant, and Casey tactfully cut him off,

"Plus, I get cold, you know?"

"You could wear one sweater, not," he waved his hands at her, "ten shirts."

He sighed at her look, that stubborn little jut of the chin that snuck out when Casey thought he wasn't looking. The way her eyes lit just slightly with a little breath of life that he just loved chasing out of her.

"Fine." He rolled his eyes dramatically. "You choose the look, _I_ choose the colors. We'll compromise."

In the end it wasn't half bad. Barry relented with surprising ease in a number of ways, steering Casey towards subtle brushes of color, promising that he'd work his way up eventually. Casey had never really enjoyed shopping, but Barry made it _fun_. It shouldn't have surprised her. Barry made everything fun.

****

Barry had worn her out but as Casey laid down that night, all thoughts of sleep scattered. Her eyes stayed wide and blinking at the dull ceiling. Thoughts and memories chased each other around her brain. Half images of her father, too vivid memories of her uncle, the poorly disguised giggles as Casey wore her sweatshirt to school in the middle of June. It wasn't long before they stopped teasing her for always being cold and just started calling her 'frigid.' They laughed like it was clever and Casey rolled her eyes, but the sweatshirt stayed and their whispers never stopped.

With a sigh, Casey stood, shaking herself as if she could dust away the memories, and Casey headed down the hall. She wanted to watch something. To dig her icecream out of the freezer and plop down on the couch like a normal, bored teen on the weekend.

A normal, bored teen who didn't have any friends, that is.

She didn't hear the tv before she reached the living room, and was surprised to see it on. It was the only illumination and in its flashes of changing light she caught sight of Dennis on the couch. She paused just outside of the hall, wondering if she should disturb him, debating whether she could just grab her ice cream and sneak back down the hall. She didn't want to bother him.

But then her feet were moving forward and she was peeking around the edge of the couch.

"Hey." She said it softly and watched him stiffen, heard the sharp breath of surprise as he turned, his features rigid but his eyes looked wide as they reflected the colors of the screen. It was reruns of an old show, the sound so low she could barely hear it, and he blinked at her.

"Casey. Were you, did you want to be out here?"

He went as if to move, to get up and leave, and Casey faltered back a little.

"No, I mean I was, but you don't have to leave. I didn't mean to interrupt. I just couldn't sleep."

He settled back, but didn't relax, eyes on her face.

"Is everything alright?"

Casey waved off the question with a half laugh that felt just a little wrong, "Yeah, just too awake."

She mentally winced. That just sounded stupid, but Dennis was nodding.

"Happens sometimes."

Casey nodded a little, teeth pulling in her lip, silently questioning how she had gotten here.

"Well I can-"

"Did you want to-"

They spoke at once, and came to a jumbled halt. Dennis fell silent as Casey blew out an embarrassed laugh.

"Would you mind if I stayed out here, for a bit? I won't bug you."

She felt the way his eyes moved over her face, assessing, almost questioning, before giving a slight shake of his head.

"No, Casey. I don't mind."

***** 

She settled on the other end of the couch, tucked her knees up and let her eyes rest on the screen. She looked small. Like she had learned to fit herself into over looked corners. Like she was afraid of actually being noticed.

Her toes moved a little as she settled in, her eyes shifted and found him watching. Dennis cleared his throat and turned his gaze forward. Images passed on the television, meant to help him unwind, when he needed distraction. He felt her presence in the room, couldn't ignore it.

"Did you have fun with Barry?"

His arms were folded, his gaze still intentionally on the tv, and it felt wrong, wrong to speak without looking.

But Dennis wasn't completely stupid. He knew he had a way of looking, of moving that threw people off. Too intense, too much focus. He knew Casey tried to flit away from under his gaze. But it was difficult not to look, in simple, innocent ways. The smooth blush of innocent skin that held a comforting serenity. The light presence that surrounded but didn't overwhelm. It could encase but never cage. From day one her unassuming presence had added a layer of comfort to coming home.

People drained. Dennis had learned that lesson long ago. They cost him effort. Energy. Even Barry, on occasion, could be like that. When Dennis had made the financial decision to get a roommate he had done it knowing he would be sacrificing solitude. But it was worth it.

Dennis hadn't really been expecting this. Casey was draining him in a different way, slowly stripping away everything he thought he had understood. She didn't match what he thought she would be, and he found himself constantly surprised, constantly wondering how she would respond.

Casey scoffed, but it held a layer of amusement.

"I don't think he'll be happy until he sees me in polka-dots." She seemed to catch herself, and dutifully added, "but yes I had a nice time."

Dennis was still trying, and utterly failing, to picture her in anything polka-dotted, when her gaze shifted to him.

"How comes he hasn't forced you into some color?"

It came out sounding almost like an accusation, and in the shadows Casey saw his lips move. She swore in the pit of her stomach she saw him smirk.

"He's tried."

His voice was intentionally low, subdued in the quiet, and it vibrated into her. Casey found herself blushing for no reason, eyes re-fixing on the screen, she made herself fall silent.

She told herself every time she shifted that she wasn't glancing at him, and was absolutely positive she was not checking to see if Dennis was glancing back.


	10. Confused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning to do this at the end, but I need to take a moment to thank every person who has taken the time to encourage me while writing this. A single comment is such a huge compliment, and to see those who comment often, sharing their feelings and reactions to each chapter has amazed me and helped me through the blank times where words aren't coming like they really should. None of you have to take the time to do that, and you choose to anyway. I want you to know how much it matters to me and how much I truly appreciate it. Your reactions, hopes, and suggestions are bright spots to my day, and I just can't say it enough. Thank You!

They had Hedwig for the weekend. It had warmed into the 40s, a heatwave compared to the winter they had had, and Hedwig wanted to go out.

Casey and Barry took him out to a park, bundled and pretending not to shiver as the boy played for hours. At one point Barry hugged her "for her own good," in an attempt to share body heat. When he stuck his cold fingers on her neck, Casey's shriek had Barry laughing unrepentantly.

They trudged back to the apartment, Barry promising grilled cheese as Hedwig tore down the hall, hollering for Dennis. To Casey's surprise, Dennis came out. Hedwig scrambled on top of a stool and he dutifully took the one beside the boy. Hedwig fired off a thousand questions about the machines Dennis worked with and animals he had read about and Dennis carefully answered each one. Casey watched Hedwig. He was the subject of Dennis's trained attention, and the boy was beaming.

She was happy. They didn't help Casey forget because when she was with them it was like those memories didn't even exist to remember.

"Mi'th Ca'they says ants get sth'ong too!" Hedwig stated proudly.

Dennis's gaze moved to find her there watching. It glinted slightly, Casey thought she caught warm humor, before he settled his attention back on the boy and answered his statement. Barry nudged her out of the way so he could set his plate of grilled cheese down, and when he smiled at her, Casey smiled back.

******* 

Casey was cleaning her last table before end of shift when a group of teens came in the coffee shop. It was Monday afternoon, her training was finished up and she had been on her own all day. She wasn't working behind the counter, but she knew her way around the rest of the place.

She wasn't really paying attention to them, wanting to clock out and head home, when she realized they seemed to be looking at her. Head down she focused on the table, not in the mood to deal with customers.

"Hey. Do I know you?"

One of the boys had stepped forward, was staring right at her, and Casey couldn't avoid it. She looked up. It was a boy she had gone to school with. They had been lab partners in 10th grade. She couldn't remember his name.

"It's Kelly, right?"

Casey bit back the automatic correction. "No, sorry, I don't know any Kellys"

She kept her voice nonchalant, went back to her job like he didn't matter, telling herself she'd be out in two minutes. She didn't want anyone knowing she was here, it getting back to her uncle in some strange, convoluted way where she was. 430 struck and she skipped to the back, clocking out and grabbing her things. The group of teens were still waiting for their drinks, and with a sigh, Casey decided to wait them out. Finally they stepped out of the small shop, and after a minute, Casey ducked out after.

She hadn't gone far when she heard him _again_. They had converged around a bus stop and Casey had to walk right by them.

"You sure I don't know you?"

He jogged a few steps to catch up to her, began walking backwards in front of her, a cocky grin in place as he looked her over. "You just look so familiar." He stopped walking abruptly and Casey had to stop or walk right into him.

"Yeah you wish you know her." One of his friends called out and Casey felt her face pale, anger and embarrassment setting in. She debated her options. She could shoulder past him and tell him to get lost, but that could cause a scene. Moody and sullen might help him remember her from high school. She took a step to the side and he matched it, cutting her off. It didn't seem wholly threatening but Casey was getting seriously annoyed.

"Just tell me your name, maybe I'll remember where I know you from. I know it's like Cathy, or somethin'."

"It's not, now please let me by. I'm late." Her eyes were fixed on the pavement and she tried to step again, telling herself not to panic. He was just a dumb kid messing around. He wasn't trying anything.

"Well hey, look I…" he trailed off, suddenly distracted, and Casey looked up to see his gaze focus over her shoulder. His eyes widened a little before a voice was speaking behind Casey.

"Excuse me."

She didn't know something so polite could sound so entirely cold. She recognized that voice, coarseness rounded out in warmth. When she turned to face him, Casey's eyes widened too.

Dennis wasn't wearing his Dennis clothes, he looked like he had stepped right off of the job sight. Red flannel pulled taut as his shoulders rolled back, creases of dirt edged the fabric. His eyes were locked on the kid in front of her and ice cold.

"Hey, man, I wasn't. Yeah, I'll just…" he took a few steps to the side, trying to casually back off, and Dennis's gaze dismissed him in an instant. It fixed on Casey.

"You alright?" He sounded harsh, but Casey's insides warmed and she nodded, letting her gaze hold his. She watched his eyes move over hers, blue eyes darkened and purposefully careful. He nodded her forward, motioning her on and Casey started walking. He fell into quiet step beside her.

"Thanks, for that." Casey managed after a minute, "He was just being annoying and I didn't want to cause a scene or anything."

She watched Dennis nod in response but he didn't speak, his jaw still tense.

"So, how was work?" She tried again after a second, and watched his gaze shift down to her.

"It was fine."

Casey hummed a little in response, shivering as a blast of cold air rushed past. In its wake she sent Dennis a curious glance. He had a black bag slung over the shoulder of her red flannel. But he wasn't wearing a jacket.

"So how come you're in that?"

He looked at her in obvious confusion, stepping around a lamp post he brushed almost against her. His hands settled on her elbow for half a moment as if to steady her. It was an easy, natural movement that in a way didn't feel like it belonged. It reminded her of Barry, almost. She realized Dennis was distracted. His normal control was shifted out of focus by whatever was going on in his mind. Every time she learned something about this man it seemed to be replaced with something new.

"Your clothes," she explained, "Well you normally don't come home in that."

He nodded stiffly. "My change of clothes got dirty."

Casey frowned a little, "Oh, well that sucks."

He nodded again, tersely, "Yes."

Casey let her gaze focus forward, kept walking as he thoughts roamed. Dennis brought clothes to work so he wouldn't have to walk home dirty, but now he was stuck doing just that. She couldn't imagine how uncomfortable that must be and she wondered if that was what had put that irritated edge to his eye.

"Do you like pancakes?" Casey asked suddenly, the question just popping out, and looked up in time to catch the brow raised confusion before he answered.

"Yes. Why."

"Well," Casey flushed, letting her gaze focus on their building as they approached it, "I dunno, I was kinda in the mood for pancakes. I was gonna make some. Do you want some? After you shower, I mean."

He stopped. Feet stopped moving and he just looked at her from his stilled position. The sun was bright but the air itself was cold against them and she had to squint against the light that wasn't fully warming them. His face was in shadow, eyes slowly considering her, almost as if his gaze was drawing in a breath before a sigh.

"Sure, Casey." He finally answered, voice almost too low to hear over the traffic on the street.

Casey went to respond, wasn't sure what to say, and faltered in place before Dennis started moving again and she fell into step behind him.

He held each door for her, and she caught his hand flexing at the contact, another layer of dirt he would need to wash away. He stayed rigid and a little distracted, beside her and yet not, until the stepped in the apartment and he came to a stop.

When he faced her his eyes were worn, the weariness slipping out without his notice. "I'll just be a minute, if that's okay."

She nodded, intentional friendliness in her response, hoping it didn't fall flat.

"Yeah, of course. I'll get started on dinner."

*******

Barry walked in to Casey flipping pancakes and looking around in surprise.

"You're making pancakes?" He peered over her shoulder and gaped a little. "You're making _so many_ pancakes."

She had doubled the recipe and felt herself blushing, "Well, I wasn't sure how many Dennis would eat, and you can always freeze any extra."

"Wait, you're making _Dennis_ pancakes?"

Before she could respond Barry was scooting her out of the way, pulling the spatula from her hand.

"Hey, wha-"

Barry tsked at her, "Get the blue berries from the fridge."

"Barry, if you burn my pancakes I swear."

Barry scoffed, flipping a few pancakes pointedly, "I never burn anything."

Casey rolled her eyes, grabbing the blue berries, watching a little bit curiously as Barry rummaged in a cabinet by the stove. He pulled out a bag of chocolate chips and sent her a grin.

"What are you doing?" she watched Barry drop a handful of chocolate chips onto a cooked pancake, add some blueberries, and drop another pancake on top.

"Making pancake sandwiches."

"That's not a thing, Barry," Casey argued, reaching for the spatula. He smacked her hand and waved her away with it.

"Is too." She opened her mouth to argue and Barry threw a blue berry in it. "Now shush."

***** 

She was trying to convince Barry to leave at least some of the pancakes plain when Dennis entered the kitchen.

He stopped at the sight of Casey and Barry arguing over the stove. Both were brandishing spatulas at each other and there was the definite scent of something beginning to burn. Casey started when she saw him, and Barry took advantage of her distraction to close in on the last of the pancakes. She gave a resigned sigh, and set down the second spatula she had found to face Dennis.

"I hope you like burnt pancake sandwiches." She grouched good-naturedly.

The oddest expression crossed Dennis's face. His lips half twisted and his head shook a little as if struck by surprise. He shifted his eyes to his brother as Barry stacked the last onto a plate and turned to face him.

"I didn't know you remembered those." Dennis's voice had gone flat, but Barry didn't notice.

"Course I do! Mom used to make 'em."

Dennis didn't answer, he took his place at the counter and his eyes tracked his brother as Barry moved about, haphazardly grabbing things as he remembered them. Finally, he had syrup and butter and forks enough for the three of them and he was eating before Casey or Dennis had really moved. It wasn't until Dennis reached for his food that Casey managed to do the same. Something had shifted in the atmosphere around Dennis and she had no idea what it was.

But then Barry was asking about work around his bite of pancake, and Casey was trying her first bite of 'pancake sandwiches,' and Barry was telling her how this was his favorite meal as a kid. All the while Dennis sat, barely eating, staring at his brother.

*****

Dennis hadn't realized how much and yet how little Barry actually remembered. His eyes were bright as he told Casey stories of the special breakfasts where their mother would wake them up early with pancake sandwiches. He remembered the way her face held kindness and she let him pile as much whipped cream on as he wanted. He did not remember that each breakfast was an apology for the night before, when she forgot to feed them dinner. His eyes were full of the bright, warm memories of the woman who had loved them. He had forgotten the in-between.

Dennis was glad. Barry held a life in memories that didn't have to hurt. Barry had been spared. But part of him ached. It ached that he couldn't forget, couldn't set aside the shaded history and pick out only the bright things to cling to. He had been too old. Old enough to understand, not old enough to change anything.

He felt Casey watching him, shifting gazes of curious concern. Barry was wrapped in his own thing and didn't notice, but Dennis didn't want to meet Casey's eye. Then he would have to lie, settle his face into an expression of nothing so they wouldn't know how much he hated the pancakes in front of him. He took another bite so she wouldn't get offended. She had been kind enough to make them before Barry had taken over. And Barry had just wanted to surprise him with something good. Dennis forced down another bite and pretended he was okay. He didn't want to disappoint them.

Casey hadn't told Barry about Dennis walking her home when he'd asked about work. Her gaze had went to Dennis, then away, the memory clear in her eye, but she hadn't said it. Briefly Dennis wondered why. Was she embarrassed? Should he not have done that? But he didn't like seeing someone in Casey's path, not letting her by, not seeing the angry flush that was stealing over her. Harmless was subjective and Dennis had no intentions of leaving Casey in a situation she didn't want to be in.

Casey helped him clear the dishes. Barry tried to leave without helping, claiming 'he had cooked.' Casey threw a dish towel a him. It smacked him in the face. He watched Barry sputter, watched Casey's eyes widen as Barry began winding up the dish towel.

"Wait, no Barry," she was retreating as he was advancing, laughing horror in her eyes and Dennis watched them play around him, stuck as an afterthought in the background as he stood in the center of the kitchen. Barry snapped the dishtowel at Casey and she gave a tiny shriek, bolting towards Dennis. He felt fingers latch on to his arm as Casey spun, hiding behind him like a shield.

Dennis didn't understand what was happening to him. She was caught up in laughter and a ridiculous game and had retreated to first logically safe place she could find. And she had chosen _him_. He knew it didn't actually mean anything, but something was ending up out of place in side of him and he wasn't sure what to do about it.

"Excuse me, Dennis." Barry stood right in front of him, and Dennis crossed arms.

"Go away, Barry."

Barry gaped in mock offense, "You're choosing _her_ side? She made me burn my pancakes!"

Casey's head popped out behind Dennis's elbow. "I did not! And they weren't _yours_!" She was gone again in a second, and Dennis felt those hands, clinging lightly to the shirt on his back, heard her hidden smirk of laughter at Barry's indignant snort.

"Barry," he settled his stance deeper, cocking a brow at his smaller brother. "Go away."

Barry rolled his eyes, he dropped the towel on the counter with a dramatic huff and exited the kitchen.

Dennis felt Casey stir behind him.

"Is he gone?" Her fingers trailed across the fabric of his shirt, barely touching his back in an absent touch as she peaked around him, her hair brushing his arm.

Dennis was moving suddenly, stepping back and twisting so that he faced her, free of lingering touch and the feel of her heat that wouldn't leave his skin.

"Yes."

Casey blushed up at him, grinning sheepishly, "Thank you, again. You make a good shield." She laughed a little, tucking her hair behind her ear as her gaze moved away.

"You're welcome. Any time."

Dennis didn't know why he said that, why her gaze widened and flitted back to his before she gave a small smile. She moved to do the dishes and Dennis fell in beside her. She let him wash, knowing it would drive him insane to watch someone else do it, but she took every dish when he was done, dried it carefully.

"So, um, I've been wanting to ask. Have you had any trouble at work, since I showed up?"

She was staring intently at the plate she was wiping though it was already dry. Images of his locker this afternoon loomed in his mind. More sawdust. Some of the men had let it die out. A few of them hadn't.

"No." He lied, but her chin turned so she could glance at him and he found himself adding. "nothing I can't handle."

She frowned. "I'm sorry for causing trouble."

Dennis blew out a breath. "You were being kind. They just don't… trust me."

A hand settled on his forearm, slightly damp. He had rolled up his sleeves and felt every part of the light touch, "I'm sorry, Dennis." It was fleeting, a passing moment as Casey reached for the next rinsed dish, but it stayed, lingering. Confusing him.

They finished the last of the dishes in silence. Dennis left the kitchen for the walls of his room. Solace closed in but it felt almost empty. Dennis reached for his tablet with a sigh, hoping reading would pass the time.

***** 

Casey wasn't really waiting. She just had a few things to do after clocking out. Nor was she doing math in the back of her head, the last place she ever expected math to be. Because she definitely was _not_ trying to calculate how long she would have to wait in order to run in to Dennis again.

Because that would be ridiculous of her.

She was just leaving work as usual, stepping out onto the side walk. If her head was on a swivel it's because she was just being aware of her surroundings. She was not looking for anyone.

Dennis was waiting for her. Standing by a lamp post, black wool jacket over grey slacks, his black bag on his shoulders. She watched him move as he spotted her, approach her, stopping beside her before he spoke.

"Saw you inside, thought I'd wait. Make sure you got home alright."

"You didn't have to do that," Casey spoke as her shoulders hunched up against the cold, saw quickly her words could be taken as rejection. "But I'm glad you did." She shrugged as she said it, trying to downplay the words. Make it seem like she didn't really care either way, to cover up the little surge of relief when she had spotted him there.

She was being silly.

She started walking and he fell into step beside, body angled against the wind. He didn't speak but he must have shortened his stride. Casey had to almost run to keep up with Barry sometimes, and Dennis was even taller, but he walked easily at her pace. A small thing, but it made her fell important. And that's when Casey realized she was reading _way_ too in to this.

There was too much wind building over the sounds of the city street to try and say anything, but the walk passed quickly in the shared silence. The sudden break of wind when they stepped inside was a relief, and Casey pulled the stands of hair away that had blown across her mouth and stuck to her lips.

Dennis's attention had become entirely fixed on the motion, and Casey flushed a little. "Gosh, I hate it when that happens."

He blinked, lips quirking slightly as he looked away. His hand ran over his closely shaved head, an agitated move but he seemed to shake it off. "I don't really have that problem," he said as he turned down the hall.

Casey's snort of laughter was quickly cut short as she clamped a hand over her mouth. Barry would have mocked her to death for the sound that had just left her. But Dennis just turned, looking at her with eyes darkened with an almost pointed type of humor, like she knew full well why he was looking at her and he didn't have to say anything.

"Shut up." Casey mumbled behind her hand.

Brow still high Dennis turned back and continued walking.


	11. Walking

If Barry noticed they entered together he didn't comment, he was too excited to show Casey his latest project. They had to design an outfit line, and make workable samples, but they were required to make it cross curricular. Barry was going to make a "mini model mannequin" as he kept calling it, and tiny clothes, and he was going to do it all out of recyclable materials.

There were plastic bottles, egg cartons and random slabs of cardboard all over the living room floor. Dennis took one look and disappeared down the hall. Casey was trying _really_ hard not to make a comment about Barry making doll clothes. He ran her through countless ideas, holding up scraps, envisioning a final project that Casey was completely blank on. Two things Casey was fairly certain of; Barry didn't make any sense and when he was done it was going to look amazing.

She made a sandwich, settled on the floor with Barry and watched him work. The sun shifted lower through the glass and Casey watched it go.

****** 

Barry finally rounded everything up and put it away around 9. When he was safely tucked in his own room Casey set about picking up all the tiny little pieces that Barry had missed.

She had flipped off the light and was curled on the couch, flipping through channels when she heard Dennis come out. There were the sounds of him moving through the kitchen. The fridge opening and closing. Water running and dishes clanking. She still hadn't settled on a show when Dennis came into the living room.

"Any suggestions?" Casey asked, turning her head to look over her shoulder at him, she held up the remote. "on what to watch."

He was a shaded silhouette against the light in the kitchen, arms crossed, the outline of his biceps evident against the back light. His features were blank in shadow and Casey wondered what details her imagination would have filled in had she not known what he looked like. The stone in his expression may have been easy to guess. Casey was fairly certain she never would have gotten his eyes right.

She watched the outline of his shoulders shrug. "I usually just leave whatever was on."

Arms unfolded and he moved, walking closer, rounding the couch.

"Even if it's, like, infomercials?" Casey asked, her head tilting up to look at him.

He paused, "Yes."

Casey watched him as he sat down. Their faces turned forward as she continued flicking through channels. She was changing them rapidly, lights from the tv flashing, looking for something to watch.

Dennis shifted on the other end of the couch. "Could you…" He started and trailed off sounding frustrated, and Casey glanced over, catching him rubbing his eyes. She remembered suddenly him reading in a dark room because otherwise he got headaches, wondered if the constantly changing lights were giving him one too.

"Sorry." Her voice was quiet and it drew his eye, she left the television on where it had stopped, an old western playing on low volume.

They let the movie play out, a slight rumble of sound. Once the credits rolled Casey stood, stretching a little in the dark. Black screen scrolling with white words letting off little light.

"Well. Good night, Dennis."

He didn't respond. She couldn't see him well in the dark. But she heard a sound, like a shortened sigh as she gave up waiting and left the room.

"Good night, Casey."

The warmth of his tone followed her down the hall.

******

End of shift and Dennis turned toward the trailers. He was walking quickly and the others noticed.

"What's his rush?"

"Maybe he has to pick up his girlfriend from school."

He ignored it.

He tried to.

Dennis usually gave the others a minute to clear out before going for his things. He didn't want to do that today. A closed locker met him in the trailer and Dennis hadn't realized he had been dreading what he would find until he felt the relief. He changed quickly, unnecessarily rough as he shoved his soiled clothes into his bag. His hands flexed before he closed it, he watched his fingers uncurl, felt their tension. He hadn't been thinking clearly all day. The date had caught him by surprise. He hadn't noticed it before. Tomorrow was the anniversary.

The anniversary of life got a name, birthdays. He wondered if there was a name for the anniversary of death.

He couldn't really bring himself to care.

Instead his thoughts had roamed around end of shift, on a cold walk home. Hope had built where it shouldn't that she might be there. It was pathetic.

His fingers found comfort in the steady rhythm of buttoning his shirt, pulling on his jacket. He wasn't clean but at least his clothing wasn't weighed down with dirt. He left the trailer with even stride.

It took two minutes to reach the little shop, only a few seconds to glance into the windows and see she wasn't there. Of course she wasn't. What had he been expecting, her to wait for him?

He shook his head, frowning, hand tightening on the strap of his bag as he walked on. He was passing the bus stop when a figure popped off of the bench.

"Dennis?"

It always surprised him, how much Casey could fit into her voice. She sounded uncertain and a little embarrassed, half out of breath. She looked up at him, squinting a little at the sunlight filtered through thin cloud.

"Were you going somewhere?" Dennis asked, looking at the little bus shelter she had been sitting in. Casey shook her head.

"Oh, no. I was just waiting."

Dennis watched her hands catch in the end of her sleeves, twist the fabric between her fingers. He had seen it before, figured it was a nervous habit. Did he make her nervous?

A flash of her fear filled eyes hit him, and Dennis shifted back, giving intentional space. She saw him do it, a shadow crept over her eyes.

"Is that okay? I mean, you don't have to walk with me. I just," she pulled on her lip with her teeth, words and gaze falling away. Dennis blinked at her.

"You were waiting… for me?"

She looked up in true surprise, "Well. Yeah," like it was the most obvious thing, her fingers leaving the fabric and now twisting around eachother. "But if you don't wanna walk with me, that's cool."

The nonchalant shrug of her shoulder did not match her eyes.

"Of course I'll walk with you, Casey."

He wondered if someone had been bothering her, if she was worried about walking alone. She seemed unsettled but not on edge.

With a shy look she started walking, and Dennis matched her stride.

Walking with her forced him to slow, to find a new pattern as he walked. He liked to walk to the rhythm of his heart beat. But now his feet were too slow, pulse was too fast. It put his body on edge, his thoughts on a turntable as he walked beside the quiet girl.

She had started to fit into the crevices, like a rose pushing through pavement. Gentle but thorned. Fragile but strong enough to gently break stone. She held life in her eye, in the half curve of her lips. But she was quiet, reserved, seemed almost afraid to live. Still she filled out the space in the apartment between him and Barry, had begun to fill out the space in his days.

And it worried him.

********

Casey walked, peeking up every so often at the man beside her. He looked pensive, maybe more so than usual, and her feet scuffed on the pavement. What was she doing? Purposefully waiting to spend ten minutes walking in near silence. Just because in the back of her mind she wouldn't admit that it felt _nice_. To be quiet but not be alone. To not have to worry about expectations you knew you couldn't fill because the silence held nothing but their own separate thoughts. Dennis could be completely overwhelming and yet not the least bit oppressive. She didn't understand it, but it was comfortable.

"How was work?"

The question surprised her, and Casey shrugged, "It was good. I was mostly in the back today. Rearranging, and restocking. I liked it. You'd hate it though, their storage room is a mess."

Dennis watched the slight smile, felt the words that showed thoughts familiarizing themselves with him. She knew about his tendencies, applied them in her mind to her own work, smiled a little at the thought. But it didn't seem to be in mocking amusement. She blinked up at him, "How was yours?"

He nodded, "fine."

Casey frowned a little, "You don't like it, do you."

A small shrug and his gaze stayed forward. "It's a job. It's necessary."

She remembered his words, how it was the only job he could get. How Dennis had never graduated. A thought bloomed and reached her lips before it maybe should have.

"Have you ever thought of maybe getting your GED, or something?"

Dennis stopped walking. Casey had to turn a half moment later and retrace her steps back to him. Flint had filled his expression and steel had filled his eye. She wondered if he shifted if the two would strike and start a spreading flame. But Dennis stayed still.

"I just thought, it could help you get a different job," Casey offered quietly, "One you maybe even liked?"

Jaw worked once and he looked away, words gathered. When he looked back they came out in a disinterested line.

"Barry doesn't know."

Casey absorbed his statement. "And if you tried to get your GED, he'd find out."

A quick nod and a too controlled expression.

"But would he care? I mean, he's your brother. He probably just wants you to do well, to have a job you actually like."

Dennis swallowed, looking down. He didn't know how to tell her that there was fear, stupid fear keeping him from wanting to see the disappointment, the attempt to hide the condescension. Barry had always excelled, strolled through high school and entered college with ease. What would he think of Dennis if he knew Dennis hadn't been able to finish high school? Dennis knew he was a lot of strange and hard to deal with things, but he didn't want Barry finding out just how much he didn't deserve any of the respect Barry managed to feel for his brother.

"What if he didn't have to know?"

Casey saw Dennis look unconvinced. "He'll be working non stop on his plastic dolls for weeks. He'll be distracted enough not to notice just about anything. I'm sure we could get some studying in."

Dennis's entire focus landed on a single word.

"We?" he repeated, and Casey's cheeks heated.

"well, I" her fingers brushed her hair away, "I got mine, a couple years ago. If you wanted, I could walk you through what I remember about taking it?"

Dennis frowned, arms crossing as he settled back. The air was cool but the wind was calming and it felt still against them. People passed, but not too closely, almost subconsciously avoiding Dennis's size and stance. In a small sense it was just Dennis there, staring down at the shy hope building in Casey's eyes as they blinked up at him.

He sighed, "I don't know, Casey… but I guess we can try it."

She looked so _pleased_. Her hand reached a moment, faltered, then stuffed itself in her pocket as she smiled at him, real hope in her eyes.

*****

Casey lay in her room, staring at her phone. Barry had taken over the livingroom again, ordered pizza as an apology because he knew there was no way Dennis would be coming out to make anything. Dennis had retreated to his room, saved from looking at the mess by a closed door.

Now Casey was searching online, trying to remember the website she had gotten her information from. GED test sites and schedules, fees and registrations. It was strange, not having to close every browser window every time she set down her phone, so worried her uncle would burst in and find it, realize what she was up to. She had already gotten out.

The fact that Dennis wanted to keep this from Barry pulled on Casey's heart. Not because she thought it was foolish, but because she understood the fear that went behind it. It was a piece of secret shame, locked and kept locked from anyone looking. Dennis didn't want Barry to know. It was so simple, almost sweet, and Casey vowed she'd run interference between the brothers whenever necessary.

She wanted to help Dennis, wanted to see him out of the job he hated, in to a place he could enjoy and not just endure. She wanted him to be happy, that wasn't so crazy… right?

****** 

"You have a washing machine in your closet."

Casey stood in Dennis's room, staring at the tiny unit on the floor in Dennis's closet. She had noticed it when she had stepped in, heard the whir of sound as it ran.

"It's a dryer too. Barry got it for me."

"…oh." Casey turned to face Dennis, "That's kinda cool actually."

It explained a lot too. Dennis changed his clothes with unbelievable frequency but Casey never saw him taking his laundry to the machines downstairs. The unit he had could only do a set or two of clothes, but it would be enough to keep up.

Dennis nodded, settling back against his dresser. He never looked fully comfortable when Casey was in his room, and she didn't want to be an intrusion. He'd answered her knock when she had come to talk before she left for work, and the washer had distracted her.

"So," she shoved her hands deep into her pockets, "I was planning to stop by the library, after work, and I can see what study books they have, if you want?"

Dennis was staring at her, direct and unemotional. It had almost a calming effect on her awkward nerves, and Casey found herself leaning back against the door jamb, relaxing some. His gaze moved then, passing over her, expression not changing but the look in eyes shifted slightly.

He cleared his throat. "I could go. You don't have to."

Casey shrugged, "Well I was gonna go anyway, unless…" She paused uncertainly, "you could come too?"

He frowned, considering it. Casey knew he had off that day, had no idea what plans she was potentially interrupting. She was on the brink of taking it back when he straightening, nodding.

"I can do that. I'll meet you at work?"

Casey nodding, not trusting herself not to trip over her words. She ducked out of his room, needing to get ready for work, wondering why her face felt so hot.

*****

The sharp edge of cold had softened, not warmed per se, but it was getting there. Dennis stood outside of the little shop, feeling the air move around him. He was waiting for Casey. A concept so foreign yet it had somehow wormed its way into his routine. A bridge had been built of tenuous friendship between them and Dennis was as dumbfounded as he was wary. She pulled on him, on his eyes, on his thoughts, wanted to pull on his hands. Something about her made him want to be where she was. Maybe he was just lonely. Maybe he was just so incredibly stupid.

But here he was, waiting beside the door she would soon walk through, telling his body to stop tensing each time it opened.

Two minutes past 4:30 and she stepped out. He watched her eyes blink in the sudden sunlight, her hair move with the stirring wind, strands of black against pale features. He wondered if she knew, how much her eyes held when they gazed around her. They weren't bright, but they were full, the only thing stealing attention from her lips. Lips that parted softly when she spotted him, curved in a slight smile. Eyes that lit with warmth, and maybe a little bit of surprise. Like maybe she hadn't been expecting him to be there.

He stepped forward as she did, was hit by the blast of cold wind that died in a moment. He caught the strand of hair that crossed her cheek, set it carefully back in its place. When her eyes widened, his hand realized what it had done. He felt the pulse in his fingertips as his hand flexed and pulled away, felt that grip around his chest that always came when he knew he had done something he shouldn't have. He had reached without thinking. Her expression fixed itself in his mind. Lips caught in a tiny, silent 'o', eyes frozen in stunned confusion. He had watched Barry touch her dozens of times before and she had never been so completely… shocked? Horrified?

He swallowed down the guilt, the cresting shame. Stepped back and settled into stone.

******

Casey blinked, blinking rapidly again. Her breath had caught and she was trying to find it. _What had just happened?_ A brush of warm fingers across her cheek, trailing softness at the look in his eye. Dennis never touched. Barry, sure, but Dennis? Memories of those hands closed around her throat burst into her mind and she could not reconcile it, not with the man standing before her, not with the hand that had just moved so carefully. So simply.

Casey didn't like to be touched. So why was every second replaying itself in her mind. Why did her cheek feel colder now, tracks of faded heat across her cheek? He had caught himself, straightened and pushed back. Hardened. Casey grasped at an excuse to move on.

"Ready to go?"

She turned and walked without his answer, wanting to leave whatever _that_ had been behind, refusing to acknowledge that it was already locked on replay in the back of her mind.

They didn't speak til they reached the library. Casey stepped through the doors into the muffled air, let the familiar feel surround her. She had spent countless hours tucked in the corner of libraries. She read as an excuse to stay where it was warm, quiet, and contained. Her uncle could never fault her for extra studying. Her teachers couldn't say she was getting in to any more trouble. Every one held differences but there were elements, shared pieces in every library she found herself in. She loved the air, slightly denser, heavy with the weight of unturned pages. Some places were bright, open, heat vents and fans processing the air but she could always find those corners filled with the familiar scent. This library was older, smaller, some would call it unkempt. Casey called it preserved.

Dennis stayed in his usual silence and for once it fit his environment. Stoic and maybe a little taciturn, like the encyclopedia on the shelf with the scuffed cover. She wondered if Dennis liked libraries, the prevailing order, the rule of quiet. The even row of books. But then she considered, perhaps the almost perfectly arranged was worse. The uneven pattern of dust displaying the popularity of each book, the way here and there a book stuck out just a bit from the rest. Did he track those details with his eyes, did his hands want to fix?

She peaked over her shoulder to check. Dennis's gaze was focused on her.

Her eyes darted forward, her head ducked as she led him to the section of study books. And end cap towards the back, with SAT study guides and Essays for Dummies. He stood to the side as Casey's gaze roamed the shelf, passing each one again, frowning. Where were the… she spotted them, top shelf, the hand full of books marked GED.

She reached, fingertips stretching, feet pressing on to tip toe. She couldn't quite get them and she heard movement, felt heat behind her as Dennis reached easily up, fingers closing around the spine of the book she struggled for.

Casey stared at the book directly in front of her face, telling herself not to move, not to over-react. There were inches between her and the arm that reached over her. Her chest felt tight but it didn't feel like fear. The memories of finger tips against her skin flared to mind and Casey blew out a breath, confused why it shook just slightly.

There were four books and he selected each, setting them in his other arm, reaching again. Only a minute or two and it was over. Casey turned her head, peering over her shoulder at him.

"Anything else?" His eyes bore into hers, direct and rimmed with something dark.

"No, thank you." almost a whisper and Casey made a face at her voice, "We can check through those and see what we want."

He nodded and crossed to a table, leaving Casey to shake herself together and follow behind.

*********

Dennis needed to get himself together. She had gone pale, but for the spots of heat that dotted her cheeks, her eyes wide and unsteady. Was it fear? What was he _doing_.

She settled beside him. Flipping each book open, looking them over. She set two aside after a minute, spoke to the table.

"Do you have any subjects you will need more studying in than others? Like math, or English?"

Casey heard Dennis shift beside her.

"Nothing in particular. I'm rusty on some things, but I usually have a good memory."

Casey nodded, biting her lip. "Ok then we probably just need this two," she gestured towards the ones she had kept. They each covered multiple subjects equally.

Dennis reached for the other two. "I'll put these back."

They checked out their books, headed back out into the sunshine, began their walk in silence.

"So I was thinking, If you wanted help studying, we could do it while Barry was working on his project. He gets so absorbed he'll never notice." Casey said as they stopped to wait to cross the street.

"You don't have to help me study, Casey. You've already helped."

Casey couldn't tell if he was being dismissive or polite.

"Well, I know I don't have to. But I would like to?"

The crossing sign blink, counted down and they stepped out. Dennis waited until they reached the other sidewalk to answer, coming to a halt.

"Ok."

Casey blinked up at him. People continued around them, like they were a stone the stream of passerbyers, parting and coming back together as they stood for but a moment. Dennis's rigid posture had relaxed into casual strength. Back arched slightly as his shoulders rolled back, arms crossed and stance wide. One brow was arched, and he was looking at he with a tiny bit of helpless confusion in his eye, like he just had no idea what to do with her. Casey felt slight, hands gripping her jacket tight, face tilted to meet the gaze that had dipped to find hers. Were an artist to pass by they would have stopped, longed to capture their silhouettes, the strength and dependence it conveyed, the lines of acceptance that neither had realized was evident in the way they held themselves towards each other. A trained eye would have seen what lay beneath the strange friendship slowly developing, would have smiled to themselves as they continued on, wondering how long it would take either of them to catch on.

"I could use your help." Dennis admitted softly.

Casey's smile was genuine.


	12. Rain

The sound coming from Dennis was a low rumble of utter frustration.

He was staring at the book Casey had given him to look over, and Casey wasn't entirely sure he was aware of it. It was like a sigh that had gotten caught in his chest.

She was seated in his office chair, feet tucked up and legs crossed, trying to keep quiet while Dennis read. Her gaze had been traveling over each little figurine, wondering when the last time Dennis had made one, when she had heard him.

He was leaning over his fists, planted on either side of the book lying open on his desk. Casey had just thought he should look over the introduction and see what he thought. He had been quiet a minute or two. But now she saw the crinkle in his brow, watched his hand raise to scrub over his face, fingers pressing into his eyes. He pushed off from the desk abruptly, snapping the book closed.

He was leaving the room before Casey had time to respond. The desk chair spun as she tried to climb out of it, and she almost tripped as she went to go after him.

She entered the hall in time to see him leave it, moving into the kitchen without even looking at Barry who had just come around the corner. Barry had to stop in order to not run into him.

Casey didn't understand what had happened.

Barry had been sketching when they got home, stretched across the couch and completely engrossed. Casey had followed Dennis down the hall, stopped when he did beside his door, nodded a little when he gestured her inside.

He had been so particular. Removing the books from the bag. Tossing the bag in the little trashcan by the door. He pulled out his office chair and motioned for her to sit down. Gave her a 'what now?' look that had Casey hiding a smile.

He didn't _look_ uncertain but she could sense it in the air around him. She had enjoyed the quiet while he read.

She didn't know _what_ had happened.

Barry approached her in the hall.

"He's in a mood." Barry quipped, sounding agitated himself, then caught the look on her face. "You don't have to worry about him. He just gets like that sometimes. Specially when he tries to read. Dennis is Dennis, ya know? Can't let it get to you."

He was shrugging, looking like he was intending to pass by, but Casey was too curious by his words.

"What do you mean?"

Barry stopped, a slightly chagrined look on his face. "Look, I love my brother. But he's got his quirks. Dennis takes some understanding. You can't really expect him to care."

Casey was taken back. "…You think Dennis doesn't care about you?"

Barry shrugged, in a way it seemed like he didn't care if his voice carried, that it could find Dennis in the kitchen.

"As much as he can, sure but," Barry sighed, running his hand through his hair in a movement that looked like Dennis, "We were separated, and he never kept in touch, ya know? Didn't even say goodbye. I wrote him, but… He seemed happy to see me when we met up, but never really cared before that. And that's okay. I mean. He's just Dennis and you love him anyway."

It was a mashup of completely unexpected words, and Casey felt each half stated hurt. She studied the look in Barry's eye. Frustration, yes, but it was deeper than that.

"Barry, are you alright?"

Her hand lay on his arm and Casey shifted closer to better see his face in the shaded hall. Barry's sigh was long, a release of pent up frustration.

"I'm sorry, babgirl," he sent her a half-ruffled smile, "I just am having a moment. It's uh, today's the date, that my mother died. I was trying to draw her… but I can't remember."

Casey wondered if your heart could break at a distance. Like she had stepped back at the sign of the first crack, so she could watch, but not really feel the pain. The dull ache reached her like aftershocks and she found herself stepping forward, hugging Barry with all the words she couldn't say.

He folded a little into her, buried his head into her shoulder and squeezed her close, taking and giving comfort, sharing wordless pain.

Her head turned against his shoulder and her eyes trailed down the hall. Dennis stood at the end. Their gazes met and Casey felt the darkness. The kind fire couldn't even touch.

"I'm sorry."

She whispered it to Barry but it traveled, reached the man who remembered the woman Barry couldn't. The one who would mourn memories of the person and not the faint idea. There was no sadness there. No loss. The stone in his eyes had fractured some to reveal something even harder underneath, and something shivered inside Casey.

 

Barry pulled away, his smile pulling her gaze back, his hand brushing her chin affectionately.

"Thank you, doll." He sighed deeply, cleansing, "I needed that."

He went to move and a glance showed Dennis was gone again. Casey found herself stopping him a moment.

"Hey Barry. What did you mean, especially when he's reading?'

Barry shrugged a little, lips pursing in thought. "I don't really know why, but reading always frustrates Dennis. I think it gives him headaches or something?"

He saw Casey's thoughtful expression, and smirked a little, "He _can_ read. I've seen him do it. It just bugs him. Probably because he's a Neanderthal."

Casey frowned. "Dennis isn't a Neanderthal." Barry cocked a brow at her defensive tone, and she shook her head dismissively, "That's not the point." She remembered the way Dennis was rubbing his eyes. "Do you think, maybe he might need glasses?"

Barry's first instinct was to chuckle, but then he frowned as if suddenly remembering something. "You know I think he actually wore glasses, when we were kids. Huh, I had forgotten that."

He shook his head a little amazed, headed towards his room, "weird." He added under his breath, and Casey watched him go, silently considering.

* * *

She found Dennis in the kitchen, reclined against the counter, arms folded, staring at the opposite wall. He didn't move when she came in. Casey moved to the fridge under a guise of getting a drink, letting the action buy time while she tried to figure out what to say.

"I apologize for walking out."

His voice reached her and she turned. Direct gaze that hadn't eased, and Casey felt it work its way into her calm. Dennis had a way of unnerving her with just a glance. The path on her cheek burned in memory. His gaze was almost as unnerving as his touch.

"it's okay. I'm sorry if I frustrated you."

He blew out a humorless laugh. "It wasn't you Casey."

She shifted forward, coming to stand just in front. Dennis had such a presence about him that you could stand five feet away and still feel like you were in his personal face. She was near enough she could see the flecks of silver like shaved steel in his eye.

"Barry told me what day it was."

It flashed across his expression, a sort of panicked need for escape before he settled back, looking at her.

"And?"

Casey's brain faltered. _And_? And what? She was sorry? It must be hard? Didn't he care…? Barry's words floated. _You can't except Dennis to care._

But Casey knew better. Seeming and Being were two very different things. And there was a reason people learned not to care.

She reached, not caring how Dennis would react, and laid her hand on his arm. An action that had prompted Barry to open secrets and welcome her comfort. Dennis just blinked at it in rigid surprise. He made no move to respond, to accept the offer of support, even if it was small. He just stood there, waiting for her to let go.

Casey stepped back, wondering why her hand felt cold. Why her heart suddenly felt embarrassed for beating.

"So uh," she cleared her throat, crossed her arms, realized it was such a Dennis move and let them fall awkwardly to her sides.

"Barry said you used to wear glasses."

* * *

Dennis blinked at the change, of subject, of distance between where she was and where she now stood. She had crowded into him and now she was cut back, casual and restrained. Safe.

Dennis frowned at the place her hand had been, idly hearing her words.

"I did." He stated, and she shrugged a little,

"Well, what happened to them?"

It amazed Dennis, how quickly something could strangle your mind. Moments forgotten and intentionally ignored could be coaxed out of hiding with a simple statement and replace all active thought, like a monster pulled from slumber in the wake of spring.

_"DENNNISS!"_

_He had run into the living room, slowing before he reached the door. Stepped inside, standing carefully, neatly. His mother stood in the center of the room. Her nice dress was flowered, modest, and wrinkled. That's what terrified him the most. She had gone out again. She always came back different._

_"WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT CLEANING UP YOUR FILTH?"_

_His eyes had searched the room frantically. What had he left out? Throw pillows stood in a careful line, not touched. The floor was spotless, everything was- he saw them. By the door. He had taken his glasses off when he came home from school. He only needed them to read. He thought he had put them away._

_Feet moved but hers were faster. Fragile frames in an irate grasp._

_"Maybe this will teach you not to trash my home with your worthless belonging."_

_The sound of her heels crushing glass. Broken lenses in a bent frame. A disdainful sniff._

_"Clean this up."_

_His mother had walked away._

_Dennis couldn't see the board in class anymore. He couldn't pass assignments he couldn't read. His mother saw his grades and told him no excuses. It wasn't because his glasses were broken. It's because he was. He should try harder and not be so stupid. Stop being such a worthless failure. Get it right and she wouldn't have to do this…_

"Dennis?" Casey was waiting for his response.

"I lost them." She watched his eyes.

"Do you think maybe they would help now?"

Dennis looked away. She was pressing, with softness and quiet care, and Dennis had to admit the truth of another failure.

"I don't know. But insurance won't cover them and I can't afford to find out."

She frowned, eyes holding understanding.

"Well maybe we-"

Barry stuck his head into the kitchen.

"Jade just called! She'll be coming in tomorrow!" He crossed to the fridge and pulled it open, talking around the berries he popped into his mouth. "Said she'd be here a couple days."

Barry talked and Casey pulled her gaze from Dennis's. Let their conversation die out and wondered if she'd get a chance to finish it. She honestly was a little eager to see Jade, with the hopes that she wouldn't overwhelm. She just had no idea what the next few days were going to look like with her there.

Casey wandered into the living room, spotting Barry's sketchbook lying open. She didn't really mean to look, but her eyes were drawn to the half-finished sketch on the page. There were fine features, a pointed chin, eyes with smudged detail like he had erased too many times. It was obvious his mother had been beautiful, but that Barry had traced multiple lines, trying to capture a fleeting mental image.

She heard him come up behind her, caught his sigh.

"I just can't get it right." He picked up the black bound book, flipping it closed, and sent her a half smile. His brown hair was mussed a little, making him look young.

"How long ago did she die?" Casey asked quietly, and Barry walked around the couch. Plopping down he tilted his head over the back of the couch to look at her. His face screwed up in idle thought. "I had just graduated high-school. So, eight years ago."

His head turned and watched Casey make her way to the seat beside him. He twisted in place when she sat down, dropped his legs over her lap and folded his arms behind his head, sighing a little. He blinked up at the ceiling, obviously wanting to talk but unwilling to let it pull on his reestablished good mood. His tone was easy, but quiet.

"I got the news in time to go to the funeral. It was a small service. I didn't really remember anyone there. Except Dennis." He gave a snort. "I hardly recognized him. I hadn't seen him since, well." He shook his head a little. "He recognized me straight way."

"But you hadn't seen him in…" Casey trailed off, trying to remember how old Barry had said he had been when he had gone in to foster care.

"Twelve years." Barry supplied, voice subdued. But then he brightened, "So you can imagine why I didn't recognize him. He was huge."

Casey nodded, glad Barry's eyes were still gazing up. She wasn't sure what her face said at the moment.

"And you didn't get to talk to him, while you were apart?"

Barry pulled a face. "Well, I sent some letters, but he never answered them. Guess letters from a kid weren't very interesting to a teenager." His shoulders moved along the couch as he shrugged. "I can't really blame him. So I don't know much about the years we weren't together. Anyway, we got to talking after the service and I told him I was looking for a place. He had just found one and wanted a roommate." Barry's hands waved about to gesture at the room, "And the rest is history."

Casey couldn't help one more question. "You never asked him about those years?"

Barry hummed a little, an odd sound between a scoff and denial. "He never asked about mine, so it's whatever. It's the past, Case. He's my brother, and I love him. But he's an out of sight, out of mind type of person, and that's just who he is."

Casey couldn't think of anything to say. She just settled back as Barry reached for the remote and turned on the tv.

* * *

Rain. Cold rain. Something about it drove Casey up the wall. It was dense and heavy and if it was just a little bit colder it would float down in perfect patches of white. Or if it was warmer, softer, it would tease the scent of life from the earth and wash the grime of this city away. But this wasn't. It was caught in a useless in between and only succeeded in making everyone miserable.

Customers tracked mud across the floor she just mopped, rolled there eyes at the 'wet floor' sign that was in their path, complained when they almost slipped. And with every step they took more of that cold, cold rain dripped off of them.

Casey watched it collect on the glass, gather and streak, building paths between the droplets. The fog spelled out the smudges Casey had to clean.

End of shift and still it fell. Casey was as miserable as the sky. She gathered her things and sighed against the window. She didn't know if her eyes should be looking. If she should be waiting. She swore the next time she saw Dennis she was just going to march up and say "Is this walking thing like a thing now, or what?" So she would _know_. So she wouldn't feel stupid killing time inside, waiting for someone who might pass by her work just hoping that she wouldn't pop up.

For all she knew Dennis tolerated her walking with him because he didn't have a choice. Casey groaned. She would have dropped her head against the window if she didn't know she would have to clean that too.

She heard the door open but ignored it. Customers usually didn't ask you things if you didn't make eye contact, and for the most part, that wasn't her job. She caught sight of the two women who worked behind the counter. Both in their mid-thirties and notoriously single, Casey watched them lean in and whisper as they casually raced to the register.

"Who is _that_?"

"Honey, you got the last one."

"No, you're supposed to be on break."

Ashlyn made it to the register first and sent a more than professional smile towards the customer that had just entered. "Welcome to GreenLeaf. What can I get for you today?"

Casey rolled her eye. It amazed her how the woman managed to fit a suggestive undertone into every word. It was the answering silence that got her attention. Her eyes turned towards the door.

Dennis stood there. Beads of water cut along the tense edge of his jaw. His flannel was soaked, pressed and clinging against the solid lines of him.

"Hey." Her voice was soft from a suddenly dry mouth. The word didn't reach him but he had watched her lips move, understood. He dipped his head to say hello. Casey could _feel_ the eyes of the two women at the register staring her down as she moved forward. The only other customers were a couple in the back, both plugged into their headphones.

"Oh he can _not_ be here for _her_."

"Maybe he's a relative."

Two poorly disguised whispers and Casey's cheeks flamed. Dennis didn't seem to hear, but he waited until she was close to bother speaking, not wanting their voices to carry. Casey wondered if he didn't realize how intimate that seemed. What it would look like in the hawkish gazes of two creatures that survived on gossip and bad perms.

"Hey. I hope you don't mind I came in." He shrugged as he said it, and Casey shook her head.

"Of course not. You're soaked. Where's your jacket?" Her eyes traced over his clinging flannel, then snapped quickly away. Her throat felt warm and she told herself not to do that again.

"It got dirty."

Casual words, but Casey didn't buy it. Dennis was soaked but he wasn't shivering. Dirty and cold but he looked completely comfortable, and Casey realized every piece of his calm expression could be a complete lie.

"Why don't we try and see if that rain will stop." She set her jacket on the table beside her, "you like black coffee, right?"

He nodded once and she turned away. Margaret was pressed behind Ashlyn, eyes demanding answers before Casey even reached the counter. She pulled a few napkins and the hand wipes from beside the straws before meeting their gazes.

"Tell me that's like, your uncle, or something. Come on, Is he single?"

Casey had stopped hearing anything past "your uncle."

The words swam through a nauseated mind and she swallowed. "Can I have a coffee please. Black?"

Ashlyn waved off Margaret as she punched Casey's order in. "You want this off your account hun?" They got two free drinks a week, and Casey nodded. She stood while Ashlyn filled the to go cup, tried to look pleasant when Ashlyn leaned in when she handed it over, asking for details later.

Her face felt cold when she walked away.

Dennis was seated, forearms resting on the table, fingers laced and held just off the surface. Casey set the coffee down beside his hands, dropped the alcohol wipe next to it, thinking he might want it.

Something changed in Dennis. His fingers moved, selecting the little square packet, turning it over and over. Brow furrowed and she swore she saw those fingers tremble.

"I don't want this, Casey." He stared at the wipe in his hands, and Casey frowned, confused, wondering if she should take it back. "To be… like this." His gaze never left his fingers, voice never rose above a murmur. "I know it's stupid, weak, to not be able to handle…"

He looked up then, shame ridging the edge of his eye. "Barry turned out pretty good. Didn't he?"

"Of course he did, Dennis." Casey murmured, trying to track the path between thoughts when his face was a blank wall. She watched him frown, look away, gaze blinking back to the wipe he wouldn't open.

"Dennis, are you okay?"

A hard breath, and he shook away whatever gripped him. Tore open the wipe and passed it over the lip of his cup before taking a drink.

He set it down. "That's hot."

"It's coffee." Casey stated, and his gaze shot to hers, darkened before he looked away, lips quirking.

"Do you like working here?" He settled back some, shifting into a position that looked relaxed. Casey was realizing just how good Dennis could be at pretending.

"It's a job. It's necessary," she parroted him. It earned her another sharp gaze before she relented. "I do, actually."

He took another drink. "Coffee's not bad."

"You're trying, Dennis." Casey really needed a get hold on tongue. Eyes locked on her own, a cold blue challenge, but Casey didn't relent.

"What happened to your jacket?" She repeated, and his frown deepened.

"I said. It got dirty."

"Yes, but how. Heaven knows you didn't do it."

He scoffed a little and looked away. Casey wondered if Dennis knew that he acted like Barry when he didn't know what to do. She had seen glimpses of it before, as they walked out in public. It was evident now. It was like Barry was his mental standard of how a normal person behaved. The thought would have been laughable had she not been so distracted.

His forefinger began tapping on the side of the coffee cup. Condensed agitation, the rest of him was still.

"Your change of clothes got dirty too?"

His finger stopped tapping. Gaze held her own. She _watched_ the debate play out behind his eyes.

"They know, at work. That I'm like this."

Casey nodded, stopping every other response until he continued.

He didn't.

Casey made herself guess because he wouldn't say it, ignoring the embarrassed fear that she might be wrong. "Do they get your stuff dirty, on purpose?"

A tiny flash to the eyes that still hadn't left hers. "Sometimes."

" _Dennis_." Sometimes her heart broke and she stood right in the center of it.

Ashlyn's voice suddenly grated through the café.

"Well would ya look at that! The rain's finally stopped!"

* * *

How did you walk beside pain and not acknowledge it? How could you address hurt that didn't want you to know it was there? Dennis kept pace but wouldn't look her way. Casey couldn't pay attention to where she was going. She stepped off a curb she wasn't expecting and that feeling of falling lurched in her stomach. Her arm shot out and tangled in his shirt. His hand closed around her elbow. Wet fabric was latched between her fingers and she gasped at how _cold_ it was. He was soaked through, buffeted by the wind, and he never said a word.

She walked faster. Dennis easily kept up. When they stepped inside of her building, Casey was slightly out of breath, but the warmth hit her, and she didn't care.

Her phone vibrated as they stepped inside the apartment. Barry's name flashed on the screen.

-Getting Jade! B home in a bit!-

Dennis nodded when she told him, paused politely to let her talk, and Casey shook her head.

"Go shower, Dennis. Just looking at you is making me cold."

He obediently moved down the hall.


	13. Glass

Jade stared at the pile of trash in front of her. "It's… nice."

"Oh. My. _Word_." Barry gaped at her in offended shock. "You are literally staring at my reject pile. I am never trusting your opinion on anything again."

Jade threw her hands in the air. "You show me a bunch of plastic scraps and asked me what I thought, what was I supposed to say?"

Jade heard soft laughter behind her. She turned to where Casey and Dennis were watching Barry show her what he had done so far on his project. They hadn't really been speaking, but they were taking up their place on the wall together. Words she was about to use to sass Casey died on her tongue.

"Barry," she asked softly, quiet enough they couldn't hear. "What changed?"

Barry blinked at her in dumb confusion. "Uhhh… what do you mean?"

Jade was too busy just looking. The last night she had been here still played in her head at the oddest times. Casey had been terrified, wide eyed, small because Dennis had used his hands to threaten her. Barry had explained he'd been sleep walking, but that didn't negate the action. Didn't erase Casey's fear.

But there was no trace of it now.

They stood just inside the living room, giving Barry plenty of space. Casey was tucked just a little too close to Dennis. Not touching. Not close by anyone else's standards, but she had invaded his bubble of space and stood inside it like it was the most natural thing. She was hiding her laughter behind a turned face, saying something to Dennis who stood just beside. And it was Dennis Jade couldn't wrap her brain around. In some ways he looked the same. Broad shoulders, arms folded over a chest even Jade wouldn't deny was impressive. Stance wide and imposing. But it had shifted. The shoulder beside Casey had been dropped towards her, his head tilted slightly to catch her words. Jade watched his face turn as he responded, looking down at her, body leaning ever so slightly _towards_ her. Dennis never leaned towards anyone. He was always rigidly upright or leaning just a little bit away. But Casey was a force that was pulling on him, and neither of them seemed to have any idea.

And Barry was as dense as a four by four.

"Never mind," Jade refused to get involved. "Show me this trash dress."

"Oh for _Heaven's SAKE_!"

Casey didn't even try and hide her laughter that time.

* * *

The apartment died down around 11, Jade and Barry finally deciding it was time to sleep. Lights flicked off, and Casey lay awake. She didn't always process things when she should, how she should. She had figured that out long ago. Sometimes she tucked them away to deal with later. Sometimes she never bothered pulling them back out.

Sometimes they turned on a carousel in her mind, demanding attention.

_Sometimes they do it on purpose._

Why wasn't meanness something humanity didn't just grow out of? Why did it fester and change, mature into something you weren't supposed to cry at anymore? Why did people get to exploit differences and call them weaknesses?

The 'whys' wouldn't stop and Casey shoved her pillow over her face, trying to block them out.

With a huff she gave in and sat up. She wasn't sleeping. If she showered now she could sleep in a little in the morning.

She crept out into the silenced hall. Sleep seemed to have won over the rest of them, and she tiptoed into the bathroom. She winced at the creak of the faucet as it turned on. Let the water heat before climbing in.

Steam built and helped cloud out her thoughts. Warm water relaxed her body. She was clean and just enjoying the spray when it turned suddenly ice cold.

Casey shrieked and stumbled out of the shower, sputtering. She dove for her towel, teeth chattering, turned off the treacherous water, glowering at the faucet.

This was _not_ relaxing. She stalked to the door and swung it open angrily, determined to climb into her pajamas and under covers as fast as humanly possible.

Dennis stood in the hall way. He blinked at the sudden light spilling from the bathroom, gaze finding her, and he froze.

"Oh. Hi."

He didn't answer her, and that's when Casey remembered she was in a towel.

"Oh! Crap. Sorry, I. The shower, it." _Shut up Casey_ she snarled in her mind, _it's not that big of a deal_.

"I'm just… gonna go to bed." She stepped side wards from the bathroom, facing Dennis, moving sideways til she found her door. Dennis just stood, expression never changing. It wasn't until she reached her room and let the door swing safely shut behind her that he blinked. Then a soft curse filled the hall.

* * *

"Oh, Kay, I need you to go through lost and found next."

Casey glanced over at Margaret. They had somehow managed to forget her name day one, but Casey never corrected them. Especially since that kid had recognized her. She would answer to just about anything if it helped keep where she was a secret.

With a glimmer of surprise Casey realized she hadn't really thought about her uncle in days. It felt good in a way that felt strange.

"What do I do?" Casey asked, and Margaret waved at the box in the corner.

"We toss anything older than a month. There should be dated tags on all that junk."

Casey crossed to the box. There were a few scarves and a couple hats. Each marked with a piece of masking tape that held the date they'd been found. She pulled out the ones that were more than a month old, spotted more items in the bottom of the box when something caught her eyes.

She pulled out a pair of glasses, frowning at them in surprise.

"You'd figure someone would realize they left their glasses."

Ashlyn was passing by and glanced at them. "Well those aren't peer-sciption, they're just reading glasses. I got a pair like em. They're nice ones though, by the looks of it. How long they been in there?"

Casey looked at the tag. "Almost two months."

"Yeah, toss em. No one's coming back for them."

Casey turned them over in her hand. They had simple black frames, and looked almost brand new. They could do with a cleaning, but… maybe she was being foolish, but Casey set aside the glasses and went through the rest of the box. She would have worried about taking them but Margaret made sure to look through whatever was getting thrown out, just in case something caught her eye. So Casey pocketed the pair of glasses, and wondered if she'd actually get the nerve to suggest them to Dennis.

* * *

"You seem distracted."

Casey glanced over at Dennis. She had met him outside of work and made the entire walk in absolute silence.

"Oh, well I guess I am."

His raised brow asked the question, 'by what' and Casey ducked her head, her hand fitting around the glasses in her pocket.

"I, uh, I'll tell you later."

He nodded, seeming to accept it. Barry would have nagged her nonstop. She found herself amused at the oddest times just how different the brothers could be. It was warmer, enough so that Casey didn't resist the urge to shriek every time the wind blew, and she let herself believe spring really was coming.

* * *

They heard Hedwig before they even entered the apartment. He and Jade were both standing on the couch, having a sword fight with, well Casey wasn't sure what but she really hoped it wasn't a part of Barry's project. Dennis took one look at the pair and sent Casey a look,

"Would you like to study?"

Casey was nodding, "Let me say hello, and then yes."

Hedwig caught sight of her and launched himself off of the couch, running full tilt to crash into Casey and give her the biggest hug Casey had ever imagined. She laughed, completely caught off guard.

"I'm a pirate!" Hedwig leaned back, face screwing up in an attempt at a menacing scowl.

"Yes, I can see that. Is Jade one too?"

"No! She's a, a…" he trailed off and looked over his shoulder, "Mi'th Jade, what are you again?"

Jade laughed, climbing off of the couch. "Navy captain. You stole my ship." She brandished what Casey now realized was an empty paper towel roll. "And I'm here to steal it back!"

Hedwig hollered and charged the woman, leaving Casey free to slip down the hall. But she hesitated, and ducked into the kitchen.

She spent way too much time cleaning them then it really called for, but when she was done she had a pair of glasses, dried and streak free, and a bundle of butterflies tied in knots in her stomach.

Dennis's door was shut and she knocked lightly, waiting for it to swing open. Dennis greeted her, still in the button down he had worn home from work, but there was a towel over his shoulder.

He stepped back, letting her in, but didn't shut the door behind her.

"I was going to shower. The books are on my desk if you wanted to choose where to start."

Casey nodded, watching him step away, wondering if she should be surprised Dennis had just left her alone in his room.

She wandered to the desk, setting the glasses carefully on its top. She looked for the books but couldn't find them. There was a box here that Casey hadn't seen before, and with a shrug she peeked inside, wondering if Dennis had stored them for safe keeping.

Folders filled the inside, stacked on top of each other, and she lifted a few out to check underneath. She was putting the folders back when the labels caught her gaze. Each had Barry's name on them, with dates going back fifteen years. She opened the one dated longest ago.

Scraps of paper were tucked inside. Some had torn edges, only a few words visible and looked like a child's wobbly scrawl. Others looked like the surviving corner piece of a paper that had been burned. Casey didn't understand what she was looking at, why Dennis would have kept what looked like trash, carefully labeled in its own folder. She opened the next and a newspaper clipping fell out. A photo of a science fair, the three top students were shown holding their projects. The third place winner was a little boy with wild hair and a smile that took up half of his face. The caption read Barry's name.

There were others inside. Clippings of posted honor roll. Programs from plays Barry had been in. It was like Dennis had collected every piece of Barry's life that he could.

The third folder was the most recent. Less scraps, more documents. Receipts it almost looked like. She read one. "The Senior Class of Penn Hills Highschool thanks you for your anonymous donation. Your support will be applied to Barry Crumb as per your request." She skimmed the rest, eyes lighting on the attached photo at the bottom, a bunch of kids in front of a fountain, on what looked like their senior class trip. She combed through the papers, each confirming building suspicions. Dennis had been supporting Barry any way he could possibly think of for years.

One letter was from Barry's college. The college that Barry thought he went to on scholarship. She was holding Dennis's payment agreement with them.

The last paper held her gaze.

It was a petition to become a legal guardian.

 

Dennis had tried to get custody of his brother.

 

Casey didn't know why it hurt to breath. Why her hands were shaking when she set the folders down. She went to put them back, return them to their private seclusion when a photo in the bottom of the box caught her eye.

There were solemn people milling in the background, clothing dark and polite. Flowers hung on the wall beside a photo of a woman with fine features and bright blue eyes.

Barry and Dennis stood beside it. Neither were looking at the camera, as if neither had known the photo was being taken. Barry had sorrow evident across his features, eyes red and staring at the photo of who Casey could only believe was their mother. He was slumped and leaning, as Dennis stood, expression subdued stone, arm out carefully, gently holding on to his brother.

"What are you doing."

Casey started back, heart staggering, eyes darting to the door she hadn't heard open.

"I was looking for the books, I didn't mean to-" Two steps and Dennis took the photo from her. He removed the folders and set them in the box, dropping the photo inside with too little care.

"The books are in the drawer."

He closed the box and moved it, away from Casey, setting it beside his closet. He faced her, His black shirt set off the dark lines in his eye, brought to life the fire building behind them.

"I don't appreciate people going through my things. It shows what kind of person you are."

Casey winced a little, "I know. I'm sorry. I did not mean to pry. I was just looking for the books, and then I saw… Dennis," her brain was spiraling, "Barry has no idea. Why don't you tell him?"

Jaw hardened and he looked away. "Tell him what," he clipped.

Casey took a step towards him, "That you have all those things about him, in school, and his plays. He thinks you didn't stay in touch, but you did."

She didn't trust the way he wouldn't look at her. Dennis always looked at you when he spoke unless he made an intentional decision not to.

"He doesn't need to know."

"He thinks you don't care!"

It hurt. She saw it hurt him though he tried to hide it. "Does he know you tried to get custody?"

His expression twisted, "I can't tell him that."

"Why not?"

What was wrong with her feet that they moved when she wasn't paying attention? She was in front of him now, staring up, resisting the urge to reach up and press her fingers against his chest in some tangible attempt to understand.

There was something about his voice when it went low that made Casey feel it before she ever really heard it.

"Because then I would have to tell him why I couldn't."

Casey took a breath, letting the grasping need in her fingertips die down before she asked, "why couldn't you?"

"I tried, like you saw, when I was 18, to get custody. I didn't want my brother in foster care."

Casey nodded, eyes telling him to go on.

"But Barry was never _in_ foster care." He answered her question before she could ask it. "My mother lied. To me and to Barry. She told me, that they took him away. Because I"- he broke off, swallowing back those words, choosing others. "but it wasn't true. She gave him up. Barry wasn't _taken_. He was put up for adoption."

* * *

Dennis watched her lips round out in surprise, that tiny space in the center that allowed her breath of surprise through. Her eyes danced between his and held a thousand questions. He thought that if he stepped a half step forward he would be able to feel them in the air, pressing against him. Another step, and he would be able to feel her.

He kept his feet in place.

"I can't tell Barry his mother didn't want him."

The truth would shred Barry into too many pieces. He _loved_ their mother. Missed her. Wished he had never been taken away. Tried to reach out, to come back to them in letters that Dennis's mother destroyed right in front of him. _She didn't want him infecting his brother. Said they took him because Dennis couldn't be trusted. She had to protect her baby from him. Just like Kevin. Because everything needed to be protected from him._

Casey seemed to know, when words were useless, when trying made it worse. He thought, he wondered, if she would move this time. If he would feel that touch featherlight against him. If she would reach in that one small way. But he had stared down her attempts too many times, and Casey took a step back.

"I'm sorry Dennis." Because she had to say it. Then she let him by, to find the books, to move on.

His gaze landed on the corner of his desk and he stopped.

"What are those?"

* * *

"Oh, uh..." Casey stepped around Dennis, lifting the glasses, hiding them behind her back. "I found them. At work. They were going to throw them out so I thought maybe..."

Dennis was just _looking_ at her. All traces of lingering darkness gone, replaced with abject confusion.

"I cleaned them," Casey mumbled. "They're reading glasses."

She felt his gaze move over every part of her expression, analyzing, determining something Casey wasn't sure but when he stretched out his hand she got the distinct feeling his decision didn't have anything to do with the glasses themselves.

She handed them over slowly. His fingers were warm against hers and she felt the ridiculous desire to latch on, thread her coldness through his warmth. Her hand pulled back quickly.

She tried not watch as he studied the glasses, turning them over before opening them, sliding them on. He blinked, eyes adjusting, focusing through the lenses. The sheen of glass heightened the blue of his eyes, the straight black frames an even line across the dip in his brow. He looker sterner, more careful. Intent.

Dennis reached for a book and flipped it open, his eyes moving slowly down a page, blinking repeatedly. His frown was so compressed into a look of almost anger that Casey was kicking herself for even trying this. Then Dennis straightened, his chin turning a little as he looked at her.

"I think... that they might help."

Casey's smile slipped out.

"Thank you, Casey."

He blinked at her behind those glasses, reminding her of Hedwig, making her smile grow wide. He read the laughter in her eyes. "Stop that."

Casey's smile held sweet innocence. "Stop what, Dennis?"

His lips curled and his eyes flashed, an answering challenge laced with a dark line of humor, and Casey felt her stomach twist in knots. She reached for the books to distract her fingers.

"Here," she pushed it towards Dennis. "Put those to use. I'll quiz you when you're done."

* * *

It wasn't _fair_. Dennis remembered everything he had read with an ease that made Casey more than a little jealous. She could tell he was still adjusting to the glasses, but he had gotten through a couple chapters before wanting to quit. She ran through the suggested questions with him, and he answered each as if he was reading it straight from the text. When he gave the next correct answer verbatim, Casey's gazed fixed on him suspiciously.

She was seated in his office chair, book open in her lap, staring him down as he sat at the edge of the bed, five feet away. "How are you doing that?"

His brow rose in question. "Doing what?" He had removed his glasses when he was finished reading, but had not put them down. He held them still as they studied.

"Getting all of these answers right. Like word for word right."

He shrugged, "I have a good memory."

Casey scoffed a little, "That's an understatement," she muttered under her breath.

Dennis ignored her quip, sending her an intentionally even look. "Next question?"

Casey rolled her eyes, "Show off."


	14. Sleep

It was already nine oclock, but Jade was _insisting_ that when she got back from dropping Hedwig off that they were going to watch a movie. Casey had quickly learned there was no arguing with Jade, and when she saw even Dennis obediently waiting, she had to smile.

Barry had turned the television on, then ducked into his room to put a few more minutes into his project. Casey folded herself onto the couch, stifling a yawn. She had not slept well last night, the blast of sudden cold water in the shower had woken her body and running into Dennis had set her mind into overdrive.

She was paying for it now, eyes drooping, wondering if she could slip down the hall. She went to stand just as Dennis came into the room. She froze as if in the action of being caught, guilt written on her face and Dennis stopped.

"She means you too."

Casey groaned, flopping back on the couch as Dennis moved to sit down, not at the other end of the couch, but the cushion next to hers. He wasn't close, but he was far closer than normal.

"I know," Casey grumbled, "But I'm tired. I couldn't sleep last night."

She made the mistake of glancing at Dennis as she said it. Underlying energy filled his eye, pulled out the blush in Casey's cheeks.

"I couldn't either."

Casey's gaze darted back to the screen, telling herself she was over thinking everything. Just because she was stuck on one embarrassing moment when he'd seen her in a towel, didn't mean he was.

"Do you like cooking?" Casey blinked at his seemingly random question, before realizing what they were watching. Her eyes had been intentionally fixed forward, but not actually seeing. It was a cooking show, and Dennis was holding up the remote. "We can change it."

"Oh," Casey shook her head, "No, that's fine. They're kinda fun to watch sometimes."

Dennis grunted a little in response, setting the remote down. He wasn't looking at her, but Casey still felt the need to keep talking. "They're not very realistic, though."

Dennis glanced at her, curiously, "How's that?"

It was strange, Dennis was looking at her with interest in what she was going to say, not in an awkward need to fill silence with conversation. It made that nervous lump in Casey's throat dissolve, had her turning just a little to face him.

"Well, all the hard stuff is done. Anyone would like cooking if everything was already all lined up in little pre-measured bowls."

Dennis nodded, "I suppose."

Casey hid an amused scoff at the allowing tone. "Cooking's a lot more irritating when you have to spend fifteen minutes looking for a measuring cup."

Dennis's lips moved, "I don't spend fifteen minutes looking for a measuring cup."

Barry's entrance cut Casey's response short. He sighed dramatically, plopping down in the little piece of space between Casey and the arm of the couch. He was practically on top of her and she glowered at him from under his elbow.

"Excuse you."

Barry looked over his shoulder at her, wiggling to get into the seat. "Oh come, there's plenty of space, just move down."

Casey relented, rolling her eyes. She scooted out, grabbing up a couch pillow and shoving it in his face for good measure. He caught it, propping it behind his head as he settled onto the couch, forcing Casey to move further down.

She felt something warm hit her shoulder and looked behind her surprised.

She had backed right in to Dennis. He was peering down at her in surprise, entirely focused on her upturned face as she tried to stutter out an apology.

* * *

Dennis was frozen. Casey was pressed against the length of his side, eyes lit with flushed embarrassment, lips half forming a word. She looked shocked.

"I'm baaack" Jade floated into the room. "And good, you're all here."

She popped the movie into the DVD player and whirled back to couch. She took the final cushion beside Dennis before he had had a chance to react, cutting off Dennis's exit.

"This couch isn't made for four people." He stated. Jade was practically touching him, taking up way more space than her slender frame required. She and Barry were both sprawled and comfortable, leaving Casey and Dennis pressed in the space between.

Barry turned, draping his leg over Casey's knees. "Then sit on the floor."

Jade's huff of laughter turned into a shush as the movie started.

Dennis didn't know what they were watching. Images lit across a screen that held no interest. No distraction. He was tense, worried they would somehow sense the rapidity of his pulse, hear the shallow edge of his breathing. All because Casey was too close for comfort.

He hadn't meant to see her, white towel against wet skin, eyes wide and gasping. He had intentionally not noticed. For weeks now he had forcibly refused to acknowledge what anyone could see. Casey was beautiful. It was more than just her features, it was what they held, how they fit. Dark and expressive, she held the grace of a thousand shadows formed in the hollows of waves. She was like moonlight on water, half hid behind clouds. She wasn't bright, or eager, but she was soft and calm. That natural place between warm and cold, where the temperature of the air matched your skin and you just _were_. But then their eyes would meet and that air would stir and he would feel it passing, raising shivers as it moved over him. His body stood on end.

He had done so well. But there was only avoiding for so long.

Casey had worked her way into his secrets and settled calmly inside. She never pushed, never forced words or tried to rip the past out of him. But she stretched. Like vines between cracks she made her way into places she shouldn't be able to reach. She broke stone with steady care. For Barry. For their past. For him.

She looked at him and he knew in some small way that he mattered. She tried to help. And maybe it wasn't _for_ him, but she tried _with_ him and it left him more than a little confused.

The movie played and that warmth stayed beside him, holding tightly together. She wouldn't relax and neither would he. But slowly he felt a softening change, her presence settle more firmly. Brush of heat against his side became definite touch. Then with a soft sigh, Casey's head came to rest on his shoulder.

Casey had fallen asleep.

Dennis expanded. There was space between his breath, between each thought, little pockets of disbelief. He was touching shadows and they were warm.

Barry glanced over, noticed Casey slumped against him, and grinned in a _gosh that is cute but man am I going to mock her for that later_ type of way. He caught Dennis's gaze.

"Should I move?" Dennis questioned.

Barry snorted. "Don't you dare. She looks so comfortable, you monster. Let her sleep."

It felt like permission, an excuse, a reason to stay where he never wanted to move from.

The movie droned on.

Dennis didn't want it to end.

* * *

Casey blinked awake, shifting in an expansive yawn. Her cheek brushed something soft, her body was curled against something warm. She was tempted, so tempted to let her eyes fall back closed, to stay where it was comfortable, but there was something flashing in the back of her mind. It was like the little light on the answering machine that couldn't be ignored, and she let herself wake up enough to realize where she was.

Livingroom. Couch. Scrolling credits on the screen. The warmth she was against moved, and realization bolted through her.

She had fallen asleep on Dennis.

On _Dennis_.

Not Barry, who would mock her for days to come and make up stories about how she snored. No, that would have been too easy. She had latched herself onto firm heat that for some insane reason she had not let go of it yet.

Had her head just nudged against his shoulder, that would have been embarrassing enough. But no. She had turned into his side, wrapped her arms around his own, tangled her fingers in the hem of his shirt. She had _clung_ to him.

She was _still clinging_.

"Hey." He spoke. Rough shouldn't be so soft, but it was.

Casey forced each finger to release its hold. Pulled her hands back, pushed and moved til she was sitting up. Only then could she bring herself to look at him.

He was leaned in, peering down. It wrapped around Casey like protection. He wasn't _doing_ anything. Just something about the way he held, half turned towards her, a solid expanse in the dark. It made her want to go back, lean back into comfort.

Casey shook head, she must still be tired.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."

He shrugged, but his voice held an intensity. "Barry told me to let you sleep."

She glanced around at the reminder, Barry and Jade were nowhere to be seen. It was just them and the darkness and the memory of touch.

Casey stood. Too quickly, and she wobbled.

Hands on her elbows, steadying.

_unsteadying._

She took a step back.

 

"Good night Dennis."

She left before he could respond.

* * *

"Know what we should do?"

Casey looked up over her coffee at Jade. She had made it into the kitchen the next morning, still way too tired, and caught Jade and Barry mid debate of what they should do with their Saturday. They were shooting each other's ideas down with a vehemence that made Casey think it had nothing to do with the actual suggestions, and everything to do with wanting to win whatever idea contest they had come up with in their heads.

Barry looked at Jade expectantly. Casey was actually a little curious what the woman would say. Dennis sat at the counter, hidden behind a paper, paying them no mind.

"Go shopping." Jade finished, and before Barry could respond, she turned her gaze on where Casey and Dennis sat. "We should _all_ go shopping."

Barry rounded on the pair, and Casey suddenly felt like prey between both of their gazes.

"Not a bad idea. Can you believe I took Casey out for some new things, and she has managed to wear that," he waved a hand at Casey's black sweatshirt, "over _every single_ one of them?"

The smirk in Jade's eye made Casey realize there was no getting out of this. Jade only cared about shopping if it was fun, and setting Barry on Casey _again_ was too good to pass up.

Dennis folded his paper and stood, turning to leave.

"Hold up, hunk. I said we _all_ go."

Dennis faced Jade. "I have no interest in shopping."

Casey's gaze darted back and forth between the pair. Jade's hand was propped on her hip, sass imbedded in every part of her stance. Briefly Casey wondered if this is what Jade looked like facing down an irate passenger on a flight. She had a feeling it never ended well for the passenger.

Dennis didn't seem very impressed, and Casey got the distinct impression that every time Jade had coerced him in to doing something before, he had allowed it out of respect for her and his brother. Dennis didn't make waves if he didn't have to.

Dennis also had _zero_ intention of going shopping with them.

Casey cleared her throat, "um, actually I don't really feel like shopping either."

Barry threw his hands in the air, 'Oh come! We finally agreed on something, you can't _not_ go." He spun Casey to face him, patting her cheek gently.

"Please, babygirl? You'll have fun."

His eyes were pleading, lips struggling to contain the smirk that just _knew_ she was gonna give in.

Casey's gaze shifted to Dennis. His gaze was locked on his brother's hand, when it shifted to her own Casey sent him a look. _if I have to do this, you do too._

She never in a thousand years thought it would work. But Dennis rolled his eyes, his sigh lifting his shoulders.

"Fine."

Barry's mouth popped open audibly in surprise. Jade passed by, tapping his chin closed. The wink she sent Casey held something Casey didn't fully understand, but her cheeks warmed because of it.

* * *

They crowded onto the subway. Jade and Barry were trying to decide what store they were hitting first. Casey kept her head down and tried not to look at all the people.

She was normally fine, in public, on the street, but when humanity crammed so tight she couldn't breathe, an edge of panic set in. The subway stole that little ring of personal space that a stoic disposition generally set in place.

Dennis was behind her. Rigidly standing, intentionally not touching _anything_. The fact that he had even boarded was a miracle. She could feel his presence, tried to keep set space between them in the jostling cars, a breadth of personal space he would be lacking on every other side.

They were heading across town, towards the place Casey had been avoiding since the day she left. She knew it was unlikely, being recognized, seeing anyone, seeing her uncle. But that didn't stop that little voice of unreasonable fear growing louder. People moved and Casey shifted back, avoiding the shuffle. She connected with something solid. For the second time she had managed to back right in to Dennis. They jerked to a stop and her heart lurched in a way that was painful. She stumbled, off balance, and his arm moved, hand grabbing a bar to steady them. She felt his hand at her back. Her fingers had moved and inexplicably grabbed his sleeve.

It was an over-reaction and Casey should feel embarrassed. Normal people knew how to ride a subway. Barry and Jade hadn't even noticed, weren't even fazed. But there was slight tension in the hand at her back. It didn't move as they waited for their stop. It stayed, steadying.

Casey didn't let go of his sleeve.

* * *

"What about this?" Barry spun to face Jade, holding a floral dress up to himself.

"For Casey?" Jade clarified, earning an offended snort.

"Yes, of course," he swung the dress back and forth, "Hurry and decide before she comes back."

Casey had agreed to try on three outfits as long as everyone agreed on them. Barry had suggested ten, and been grudgingly talked down. Jade didn't want to waste any of their choices on something Casey would hate. She studied the swinging garment, it was a flash of garish color, loud large flowers covering the fabric. But the style was nice, light and twirling.

"Would Casey like it?" she ventured, and Barry rolled his eyes.

"Casey doesn't like anything."

"Casey likes things." Dennis's voice surprised them both.

He was standing just beside them, had been nothing but a stoic shadow this whole trip. He was eying the dress Barry held. It was hard to tell, given his general expression, but he did not look impressed.

"Well, what do you think Casey would like?" Jade asked, ignoring Barry's protest when she took the dress from him and hung it back up.

Dennis shrugged, looking decidedly uncomfortable now that Jade had put him on the spot. "I'm not sure."

Jade turned in place, gesturing to the racks around them. "Just choose something."

Barry scoffed, "He's going to choose the _drabbest_ thing."

Jade smacked her brother's arm, "let him be, so he can choose."

Dennis didn't look inclined to pick anything. "Oh come on," Jade said, "Anything has got to be better than Barry's last suggestion."

Dennis shook his head before stepping forward. His gaze moved over the clothing quickly, dismissively. When it focused on something two racks away, Jade turned in very real curiosity.

She knew almost instantly what he was looking at. She selected it, unable to stop her smile when she pictured Casey in it. In her opinion, at least, it was perfect. She was still trying to convince Barry when Casey returned from the restroom.

She saw the dress Barry had re-grabbed from the rack and a look of dread covered her face. Jade quickly shoved the garment away and held up hers instead. It was soft. A deep green sweater dress, trim enough to compliment her figure without being form fitting. Casey reached for the dress, let her fingers trail down the long sleeve.

"That's actually... not bad." she murmured softly.

Jade laughed, "admit it, girl, you love it." She sent Dennis a knowing look as Casey took the dress from her. He looked back, a steady gaze that held intentional nothing. Dennis's eyes had walls, and Jade found herself wondering just exactly how that girl had managed to break them.

They herded Casey to the fitting room, Dennis wandering off to some other part of the store. Jade wouldn't have thought anything of it before, but now she wondered at it.

Casey stepped out in their first selection. A light sun dress that floated when she moved. It was a little too girlish for Jade's taste, even as Barry gushed over it. Something though, Jade didn't quite like. Casey blushed a Barry's compliments, fingers brushing her hair back, gaze dropping to the ground in shyness. She looked uncertain. So _young_.

For the first time Jade realized she had no idea how old Casey was. She had assumed, with her general collected air and calm maturity that she was in her early to mid-twenties. Now she suddenly wasn't sure. She asked Barry as Casey changed. His answer of "nineteen" had Jade reeling. That was young. Waaay young. _Whatever_ this was that had Casey and Dennis turning towards each other left an unsettled feeling on Jade's tongue.

* * *

In the end they only talked Casey into buying one thing; the dark green sweater dress. Everything else was politely, but firmly denied. The atmosphere had changed, somewhat, to Casey on the way back. Barry still talked her ear off, but Jade had become a bit reserved. It was an odd look on the outspoken woman, and Casey was worried she maybe wasn't feeling well. Dennis had faded into the background, holding a single bag from the store, simply not speaking to anyone. It had been a nice day, but Casey was glad to get home.

She was in her room, hanging up her new dress, when a knock sounded on her door. She went to open it curiously, thinking maybe it was Jade. It wasn't. Dennis stood in the hall, a large shopping bag at his side that he held out wordlessly when she opened the door.

"Um… what's that?"

"For you." he stared her down until she took it, glancing inside. "to replace what Hedwig broke." She caught a glimpse of a lamp on the side of the box inside.

"Oh, thank you, Dennis. You didn't have to do that." She had been making do with her phone flashlight when she needed it, been intending to replace her light but never really got around to it.

Dennis shrugged, "Should have gotten it sooner. Sorry for that."

"No," Casey shook her head, "That's fine. I appreciate it."

He nodded a little at her smile, went to turn away.

"Do you wanna study, later?" Her voice was intentionally low, not wanting it to carry down the hall and find Jade or Barry.

He stopped an turned back. "Jade will be using my room."

"Oh…" Casey glanced over her shoulder at the sleeping bag scrunched against the wall. She really needed to get some furniture. There was no way she could invite Dennis to study in her room. She didn't have any chairs. "How do you feel about floors?"

* * *

Casey couldn't believe Dennis had actually _agreed_. Now she knelt beside her sleeping bag, distracting herself with unpacking the lamp, wondering when Dennis would be coming in to study. She had said "later."

Why on earth hadn't she specified what 'later' meant?

Light still came through her window, and she left the overhead light off as she opened the bag. She pulled the box free, and turned the lamp over in her hands in surprise. It was small, lantern like, square, with four rippled panes of glass. Metalwork etched around the frame. It looked sturdy, but ornate almost. She plugged it in.

Light danced through the rippled glass in a slightly dazzling affect. It was bright, and pretty, and happy, and Casey liked it more than she ever thought she would care about a lamp. Setting it in place beside her sleeping bag, Casey pulled out her phone, telling herself she wasn't waiting. She stretched out, getting comfortable, too comfortable. Before long, Casey fell asleep.

_Caseybearrrrr. Caseybearrr_

_Memories follow like shadow, dark and lingering sludge from the past. Lantern light plays in the distance, a bright melody through the panes. Shadows break the patterns on the glass. You can never escape. You can never escape._

A sharp knock on the door.

Casey jerked awake.


	15. Feel

Dennis paused in the hall, book tucked beneath his arm, glasses held in his hand. His fist rose but met hesitation before it knocked.

A sound barely reached him. Slight, but dark, like a distressed whimper. He was knocking, turning the handle and entering before truly considering. Concern had replaced thought.

Her room was lit with the glow of lamp light, casting patterns on the wall. Casey lay in its light, half tangled in her blanket. She was pressed up, eyes too wide, and blinking at the room, at him, at her hands in confusion.

"Are you alright?" Dennis crossed to where she sat, knelt just beside. It would catch up to him that he had entered her room without permission. For now, he just watched her frown, brow dipped and hands shoving the blanket off of her as she sat up.

"Yeah. I must have fallen asleep. Ugh." She tried to shake the dream away, her hand unconsciously landing on his arm, fingers slightly gripping his sleeve. "I guess I was having a nightmare."

Hair mussed from sleep fell over her shoulders, eyes filled with the lingering trace of her dreams peered up at him in that place before embarrassment. Dennis didn't want it to shift into that awkward moment that would come, to replace that barrier in the air. He wanted to forget who he was and just let himself breath. Like that moment in the subway when her fingers had clung to his sleeve, and she had rested against his steadying hand.

"Do you still want to study?" He held up his books in question, trying to distract, and Casey nodded, blinking away sleep.

"Yeah, of course." Her hands straightened the blanket, motioning for him to sit. Slowly he settled onto it. His back leaned against the wall, feet carefully off of the blanket, side by side on the bare floor. Dennis would never be truly comfortable, seated on a floor, no matter how clean Casey kept her room. But she didn't balk at the rigid posture, didn't smirk in a hidden way that she thought he wouldn't catch. She just sighed a little,

"I'm sorry I don't have anywhere to actually sit."

Casey let her eyes roam over the room, seeing it as maybe Dennis would. Bare. Empty. Pathetic. Truth was she rather liked it. It was simple, like she was camping out in some sheltered place. There was what she needed and nothing more. In time, perhaps, she would want to find things to fill in the corners. Maybe an actual bed. But for now it felt safe, in her control.

Dennis looked around the sparsely furnished room. Barry worried at times, said he didn't like Casey having to sleep on the floor. Dennis understood that it was Casey's choice.

"It's fine." Her hands busied herself with getting his books, hair fell to hide her face. "what was your nightmare about?" She brushed it away, not answering, but Dennis didn't press, didn't need to pull at the things she didn't want shared. He had learned long ago to never force. Not friendships, conversations, polite or casual touch.

So when Casey settled just beside him, it was her choice. When she set the book in his hands and let the warmth of her arm brush his own, it was _her_ control. They shared the space they both needed. He wondered perhaps if the hidden images from her dream still haunted her, if she sought the suggestion of connection to block out memories of fear. Dreams could be a terrifying place. So he let himself hold just slightly less rigid in the space beside her. He let his body relax. Told himself not to think or dream about the feel of her, and to simply be there.

It was amazing what the presence of another person could do. Sometimes it was a force that could push you to the extreme, when the walls were already too crowded and just the fact that someone else was breathing your space could drive you insane. But if the presence was right, if it was comfortable, it could sit in silence and have its calm effect.

He stayed and let her work their way through the pages, but he couldn't ignore her completely.

Dennis collected every touch. Each accidental brush of connection. She would reach to turn the page and her hair would brush his arm. The trace of her movements would warm his side. There was space between them but somehow Casey managed to fill it. It lingered in his mind and beneath his skin. His thoughts lost their focus on anything but her.

* * *

Casey smoothed down the page, letting her fingers linger. There was warmth this close to Dennis. It was funny how easy it was here, to erase the first layer of memories. Push them away into the background, pretend that they weren't dancing in the back. She forgot, for minutes at a time she forgot the place she swore she would. Then her vision would shift and she would see them, those flashes of memories peeking through the cracks. Casey didn't want to remember. She wanted to soak up the strength of his presence, pretend she had to be that close. Find excuses to keep connecting.

They studied for about an hour without making much progress. Casey blamed it on her sleepy mind, told Dennis she was sorry that she couldn't seem to focus.

His eyes held hers a long moment before he nodded and closed the book.

"I'll let you get some sleep. Thank you, Casey."

She nodded silently, watching him go.

* * *

Casey woke to her phone buzzing. It was a string of text messages from Ashlyn, asking if Casey could cover a few hours of her shift that afternoon, she would take Casey's afternoon tomorrow to trade. It was Casey's day off, but she didn't fully mind. She told Ashlyn she could, and grudgingly rolled out of bed.

Barry met her in the hall; they wanted to take Hedwig to a park, and it was just the sort of thing Casey could use right now. Clear cold air that would erase the sleep, erase the dreams from her mind.

They had tumbled and twirled around each other, flashes of distorted scenes. Fact and fiction bundled until Casey hadn't been able to tell the difference anymore. She wondered if she would ever forget the sound of her uncle's voice.

Hedwig ran, and played, and Barry pulled on her scarf and asked her how she slept, a stupid grin on his face. Casey rolled her eyes and played along, pretending her cheeks were red from the wind and not the memory of waking against Dennis's arm. Too soon her time was up and she had to make the trudge back to her apartment to get ready for work.

They only needed her to cover a few hours, and they passed as Casey watched the sun slip away outside the window. Shadows had covered the sidewalk when Casey stepped out, right into another person.

She was confused. She had been watching where she was going, but when she looked up to apologize, she got the impression they had done it on purpose.

"Heeey, fancy seeing you here." The teenage boy from before was grinning at her, hands on her arms, making Casey's fingers clench. "Sorry bout that." He stepped back, made a show of dusting Casey's shoulders off. Every movement grated against Casey and her jaw hurt from the tension radiating up her neck.

"It's ok," she went to step around him, head down, and move on. But the kid turned, stepped with her, matching stride and intent.

"You're Casey, aren't you."

Casey's feet came to a dead stop. Blank eyes turned to stare at the boy.

"I _knew_ it," he grinned, smug. "They're looking for you, you know."

Casey's breath didn't reach the back of her throat.

"They got posters up at the school about you. What'd, you run away or something?"

_Don't panic, don't panic._ She tried to walk away."You got me confused with somebody else."

He didn't relent, skipping sideways to keep up with her. "That's pretty messed up, leaving your dad hanging like that. He's come around the school a couple times, asking if anybody knows where you went."

" _He is not my father_." All deniability went out the window as sharp anger took Casey's tongue, and she realized just a moment after what she had done. Casey shouldered by him, and she caught a glimpse of his offended face, heard the insult he muttered at her attitude. He was ticked off but he left her alone.

Every step felt like the one behind it was following her. She told herself she was being stupid. So some kid recognized her. So what. That didn't mean, it didn't mean anything.

She tried to unlock her apartment door, realized it was already unlocked. Dropped her keys in the hall and hit her head against the wood door as she tried to pick them up. Tears pricked her eyes against the flash of pain. Blinking, she battled them back. _Don't start or you won't stop._

Jade and Barry were arguing in the kitchen, words that distracted Casey's mind. Her thoughts followed them as her feet moved past.

"Seriously? It's wine. What's the big deal?" Jade's voice carried, drawing Casey's gaze as she walked by, trying to slip into her room unseen.

"You can't leave it on the _counter_. Dennis will freak."

Jade's finger moved and her whole body rolled to follow it, "Where else do you suggest I put it. I'm not gonna drink it. I'm just gonna keep it here."

"Atleast put it in my room," Barry tried to grab the bottle from the counter and Jade quite audibly smacked his hand.

"Your room is a black hole of scarves and art supplies. I'll never see it again, thank you very much. It stays." Barry went to respond but Jade's finger cut him off, "Hey Case, is that you?"

Shoulders flinched as Casey froze, she cleared her throat and made her voice carry. "Yeah, I'm tired. I'm gonna lay down."

Her tone didn't wobble, her feet carried on. Barry and Jade didn't notice.

* * *

The walls of her room didn't stop her thoughts. They were blank canvases for an overactive mind. What if he reported her? How long until someone showed up to take her home? Would he do it, to spite her for being rude? Was her uncle really _looking_ for her? She could see him, distraught eyes but intentionally collected expression, trying not to fall apart. To be brave while he talked about how much he missed his little Casey. How _worried_ he was. Everyone knew she was troubled, but he just wanted her to come home. They'd eat it up. They always did. He the victim of her troubled youth, trying so hard to be the father Casey lost.

How long did she have?

Maybe she was over-reacting. One teenager may not even bother. And he only knew where she worked. They didn't know where she lived. Her address hadn't exactly been entirely truthful when she filled out her work paper work. She didn't have to worry. They wouldn't find her.

_He always finds her._

She tripped from her room into a silent apartment. Barry and Jade had gone out. She didn't know where. She didn't care. Quiet feet padded in the hall. Empty kitchen stood white and bright. Barry had left the light on. Dennis hated it when he did that.

She wondered then, if Dennis had been there, would it have gone differently? She tried to imagine that lanky kid having the nerve to run into her with Dennis's cold gaze locked onto him. It was laughable.

Casey didn't feel like laughing. She pulled out her phone, holding it, realizing she didn't have Dennis's number. Didn't know what she would have said anyway. The only message her fingers wanted to type was to ask him to come home.

She was being ridiculous.

The light shone on the counter and Casey stared numbly at the glow. At the dark object on the end. Jade's wine bottle. Sitting out. She should move it. Dennis wouldn't like it out. He didn't like alcohol in the apartment.

Her fingers closed on the cold, glass bottle. It felt good beneath her fingers. Smooth and calming. She held it, and Casey let herself consider. She held it, and Casey decided to stop thinking.

* * *

It was an odd thing, coming home. Before, when he lived alone, it was like entering an abandoned oasis. There was shelter, reprieve from the heavy noise of life. But it was empty.

When Barry came, his home was never that. Disarray got packed into the corners, barely contained scraps of Barry's imagination scattered around. It took some time to adjust. Barry to learn to color within the lines, Dennis to learn to ignore what Barry did in Barry's space. But they had found a balance. A way to coexist. To share a home. It somehow gave Dennis more things to stress over while making it easier to relax.

Casey arrived and, in some ways, nothing changed. She learned to walk the space between, to be a participant in Barry's chaos just to smooth the lines before Dennis came home. He had worried, at first, that she would lean too heavily on Barry's side, both drawn to his liveliness, and attempting to avoid Dennis. Like Jade did. But that hadn't happened. She was balanced between them.

It was Dennis that was shifting, drawn against his will, if he had any will left at all. It was ridiculous. Stupidly, stupidly insane. She was 19. Twelve years younger than him.

Twelve.

It didn't matter that her eyes were older than her years should have taught her. That she held with a calmness that shouldn't come from someone so young. She _was_ young. With life, and hope, and everything left ahead of her. The last thing she would ever want was the attention of a tainted man. She had befriended him. Was helping him. Spending quiet time with him in what felt like shared comfort, but it didn't _mean_ anything. Casey was kind. The sort of kindness that gave life to stone. It wasn't her fault rock had learned to care.

It wasn't her fault Dennis wanted when he knew better.

Hedwig had made him watch a cartoon with him once. The animated character had run right off a cliff, held suspended in mid-air. It wasn't until they looked down that they plummeted to the ground.

Dennis felt like he was finally looking down.

He hadn't realized how far out he had come. Now it was too late. All he could hope was that no one noticed. He was falling, and he would make sure he wouldn't grab anyone on his way down.

He would hit the ground alone. He'd make certain of that.

The apartment was quiet as he crossed through it. Settling onto the couch, he clicked the tv on. Informercials played and Dennis settled back, letting the changing screen help empty out his thoughts. It was a mediocre escape but an effective one, usually. Now his thoughts were filled with something that couldn't be brushed away.

Something that was stepping into the living room just a few moments later.

* * *

Casey felt the warmth in her veins, a pleasant buzzing that stopped her thoughts from getting too far back in to her head. The lights were off and the tv was on. Dennis was seated in the empty living room.

"Dennis." His names left her on the edge of a sigh, and a strange feeling bubbled up inside. It felt like relief. His eyes tracked toward the sound, found her standing there beside the couch. She wondered how she had never noticed before, the way his gaze captured all her expanding molecules and somehow put them back together. She was floating yet she was grounded. Naturally, she drifted towards her anchor.

"Casey." It was a response, a question, a warm wave of sound. Casey liked how Dennis said her name. Like it was a nod in agreement. A fact. His voice added weight to her name.

"Aren't you ever tired of being afraid?" The shift in his gaze let her know she had spoken it out loud, the concerned question as his head tilted just to the side, and his eyes tracked every minute movement.

Four steps forward and she stood in front of him. His arms were folded as his head tilted back to watch her eyes. "What are you-"

Casey's hands settled on either shoulder. She felt them tighten, the heat of his skin through his shirt. She felt the subtle undertones of strength. "Don't you ever just want to feel?"

It was a whisper, a tiny sound of hope, then Casey was leaning forward. There wasn't a moment, a hesitation. There was only Casey moving with a single purpose. Her fingers tightened the fabric at his shoulders.

She brought her lips to his own.

The _sound_ from Dennis was a hard grunt of surprise. His arms unfolded as if dazed, his hands half reaching for her in the space between. Molten nerves coiled in Casey's stomach and she stumbled back.

Eyes wide and blinking. Fingers covering the lips that had just covered his own.

"Why did I do that?"

* * *

Dennis was breathing. Deep even breaths. In and out. In and out. His heart hurt. It beat too hard in a too tight chest. Every part of him that wasn't frozen was on fire. Breath quickened and he fought it calm again.

Those eyes blinking through a thousand emotions. The hand on those lips trembled. Dimly Dennis tasted a hint of the condemning scent of Casey's breath.

Casey was drunk. Casey didn't know what she was doing. Casey was looking at him in a way that told his body to move.

"Go to bed, Casey."

Hurt filled those impossible eyes.

"Do it now."

It wasn't in him to feel when Casey walked away. If he felt he wouldn't stop.


	16. Touch

_It was a dream. It was a dream. It was a dream._  
No amount of wishing could make it so. Casey woke with thick thoughts and a pounding head. She had never drunk before. She knew she hadn't really drunk all that much, but apparently it was enough. It was enough to make her lose _any sense._

Shame poured in and curled with the nausea in her stomach. She had practically thrown herself at a man who had wanted nothing to do with her. It was pathetic. It hurt. More than she cared to admit.

Intentionally she stayed in her room until there was just enough time to get out the door for work. She would order something to eat there. She couldn't _bear_ the thought of running into Dennis. Or Barry. She was certain one look at her face and he would just _know._

Work dragged in every irritating way possible. Casey couldn't stress about that boy returning, about her uncle, about anything besides what would be waiting for her when she left her shift. _If_ anything was waiting for her. She knew there wouldn't be.

Yet somehow she still drug her feet after clocking out. Let those minutes add up that it would take Dennis to reach the coffee shop. Eyes were fixed on the pavement as she stepped outside. She felt the sun on her cheek, pleasant warmth with no cold wind sweeping it away. It was still.

"Casey."

His quiet voice reached her and Casey's heart jolted. Gaze jerked to where he stood, tall beside a lamp post. Calm and waiting, his eyes searched her own.

"You ready to go?"

She could feel her pulse in her throat as she nodded.

Silence hung between them. Matched stride kept them together, neither looked each other's way. It _ate_ at Casey. She had put that awkward wall back in place between them. She had let cowardly thoughts push her into something she should know better than to want. She hadn't realized how much she had come to enjoy her friendship with Dennis until it was suddenly awkward and strained. They passed the entire walk in silence.

Barry wanted her help making dinner, some sort of pasta dish he had heard about in class. Dennis disappeared to his room. The day ate away into evening, and Casey did not see him again.

Sleep wouldn't come. It didn't come until the grey hours of the morning. She woke exhausted. Work dragged until the time she was free. Ashlyn called out that she would cover Casey's afternoon the next day, to make up for Sunday. Casey just waved at her.

He was waiting again, tall and silent, but he was there. No hello, no how are you, he just turned and walked and let her fall in beside.

Casey wanted to say something, anything, but she had no idea what. Every thing she thought to say was discarded before she bothered to speak it. It wasn't until they reached their apartment building that Casey managed to say something. She pushed the button to call for the elevator, then turned sharply to face him.

"Look, Dennis. I'm sorry. I never should have…" She couldn't say it, "Done that. I wasn't thinking very clearly. It wasn't right of me, to do that to you, just because I wanted to." She winced. "I'm sorry. I don't want us to be awkward…"

The elevator arrived and Dennis stepped inside, hand holding the door open, waiting for Casey. His gaze was fixed behind her. Jaw tense in a way she hadn't seen before, almost brittle. She took that step inside, turned to stand beside him, both staring straight ahead, watching the door slide closed.

"Please say something," she whispered.

Something in Dennis broke.

* * *

There was a ball of fire in the pit of his stomach. A rotating need to expand, to trace over memories again and again and again. How many times could he relive a fleeting touch before he went insane? How many steps could he take beside her without reaching.

He had almost made it. They were almost home. He never should have stopped for her. He couldn't _not_ wait for her. It was the sound of her whisper more than her words. It was the realization of weakness with no chance of not giving in.

Wide eyes stared, lips half parted. Dark hair played across her cheeks, leaving thin lines of shadow behind.

He couldn't escape it. He knew that now.

He was going to break eventually, the best he could do was hang on to some type of control.

Casey's gasp held a curl of sound as Dennis turned, his hands catching her hips, pressing them firmly against the railing on the wall. Then Dennis was kissing her and Casey knew what it was like for fire to consume but not burn.

He gave himself five seconds.

Five. He touched.

Four. Traced.

Three. The sigh that ends in that tiny sound

Two. Breaths that build, her fingers clinging.

One. She breaks, head falling into his shoulder, speaks his name.

The elevator comes to a stop at their floor. His forehead rests against hers.

"I couldn't sleep, Casey," desperate warmth to a voice full of struggling breath. "Every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was you."

The door slid open. Dennis pushed away. Casey stood gasping in an empty elevator.

* * *

Cabinet doors slamming, Jade furious she can't find her bottle before she leaves. Barry keeps pleading innocence. Casey barely hears.

Barry asks Dennis something and he doesn't respond. When he enters his room, Casey steps out of hers. It's a synchronized dance of tenuous evasion, because to meet is to explode.

Barry feels tension and thinks maybe they fought. Dennis could be abrasive and Casey was so nice. When he asks if she's okay, she laughs. There's a slightly unsteady edge. Barry goes to bed thoroughly confused.

2am and Dennis isn't sleeping.

2am and there's a knock at his door.

It opens and Casey is standing in the hall, eyes fix on him, shy but intent. There's no scent of alcohol now.

"Can I come in?"

Dennis sighs, "You're playing a dangerous game, Casey."

She frowns at the pointless statement. It isn't going to stop either of them.

"I know."

Dennis steps back, and lets her in.

* * *

"Are you even paying attention?"

Casey blinks. Barry is looking at her from his place beside her on the couch, pausing mid rant to gain her attention. Ashlyn had covered her end of shift; she was home before noon. Barry had pulled her in to the living room, excited to tell her something. Casey hadn't really been listening. No, she had been remembering.

She had never really felt strength before. Even when her uncle had easily physically overpowered her, it had been with such pathetic lack of control it had felt weak.

Dennis had gotten lost in his control.

Even pressure of fingertips, perfectly spaced on her hip. The precise, agonizingly careful way he had moved. Studying, adapting, learning her. She had been his intent, his entire focus. Everything he was had been centered on kissing her.

In the shadows of 2am Casey had felt completely alive.

Casey knew better than to think he was inexperienced; knew she couldn't call herself innocent. A choice she hadn't made.

She wondered if she would have made this one.

Her hands had gone to lift his shirt, his fingers closing on her wrist, stopping her.

"Casey." A warning.

The sound of a door closing had broken them apart.

Now Barry was blinking at her in borderline irritation, and Casey tried desperately to pay attention, to erase the truth from her cheeks as heat filled her at the memory. She had left Dennis a note this morning, letting him know her shift would end early. It had been simple, innocuous. Her hand had trembled as she wrote it. She pretended she wasn't watching the clock.

* * *

Constant din of machinery but Dennis didn't hear. His hands moved through the motions of work, but his mind remembers. Eyes of desperate want. The gasping, half sounds he had swallowed. That forbidden edge of silence, barely broken with the sounds they tried not to make.

Her hands had tugged on his shirt and he had remembered his scars. The sound of Barry coming out for a drink had broken the hold of insanity on them both. The air had felt cold after she left.

"Crumb!" A sharp call interrupted his thoughts, he looked towards the foreman who had just come on the floor. "Boss wants to see you!"

He rose, pulling out his yellow handkerchief to wipe his hands. He made the walk to the trailer out front, ignoring the curious gazes that followed him.

There was a man in the trailer beside his boss, a man in a police uniform. He turned as Dennis entered.

"Are you Dennis Crumb?" Dennis nodded, his gaze going to his boss in question for a moment. He didn't trust the look in his boss's eye. He looked the disgusted kind of annoyed.

"I'm Detective Dunn, inquiring about a missing girl. Name of Casey Cooke."

"Who?" He didn't know a Casey Cooke, he knew a Casey Williams. Still an unsettled feeling took over his stomach.

"You were seen talking to her a week or so ago." He watched the man shake out a paper, hand over a flyer with a picture filling the center of it. There were dust particles in the air that danced between Dennis and the photo before him, and he focused on them, reluctant to look past them, afraid of what he would see. Still he couldn't _not_ look, and he saw the details through the dust. Dennis tasted ash.

Casey stared back at him from the crumbled flyer. Younger, but definitely her. He took in the flyer systematically. It was a school photo. There was a number to call, a description and last seen location. Five words from it glared in his mind.

17 year old Casey Cooke.

Everything swam behind panic and disbelief. His eyes were on the poster, his hand did not shake. His face was a blank sheet. The other men didn't know what it was to see expressionless shock, not the way Dennis did it.

He looked bored.

He was cracking inside.

_17 year old Casey Cooke._

Two trails of thoughts were mangling themselves around each other in his mind. Panicked reason, but reason nonetheless took over. They couldn't know they had let a seventeen-year-old girl living with them. It would ruin everything.

It didn't matter that they hadn't known. He would still lose his job. Maybe even his apartment. He couldn't tell them. He had to protect Barry.

But there was another thought, the quieter one that somehow was heard between the frantic shouting inside his mind. The one that said Casey had lied for a reason. Casey clearly didn't want to be found.

He only had one choice.

Dennis shrugged. "She had my phone. She found it, was kind enough to return it. I didn't know her name."

Years of pretending to be fine kept the panic from his eye. Expression never wavered. His voice was calm, he handed the paper back and met the officer's gaze. "I didn't know she was missing or anything. She seemed fine."

The officer frowned, folding the flyer, returning it to his pocket, he withdrew a note pad.

"How did she get in touch with you to return the phone?"

"She didn't" Dennis answered honestly, "she must have gotten my work address from my phone. She just showed up."

The officer studied the man before him, looking for signs that he was lying, any hint of distress. There was nothing. He looked so and completely unaffected. It was an odd story, but the witness who had reported seeing the missing girl here had said themselves that Dennis and the girl hadn't looked particularly friendly. It was entirely too possible that they had met as strangers, completely as Dennis had said. But he didn't quite like it. He handed a card over to the man, aware of the tension coming from the man's boss. Either the man didn't like Dennis or he didn't like cops.

"Well if you think of anything else, give me a call."

Cold blue eyes were fixed on his own as Dennis Crumb nodded. Detective David Dunn stood to leave, something telling him that this would not be the last he would see of Crumb.

The door swung shut behind the officer, clanging against the frame of the trailer. The noise was harsh to Dennis's ears, grated against thoughts that were building like unsteady blocks.

"What are you up to now, Crumb."

Dennis looked towards the man in the chair, gut twisting at the obvious mistrust in his eyes. Before Dennis could answer, he shook his head, pushing up from his seat, his sighed.

"Look, why don't you head home for the day."

"Sir, I wasn't involved in any of this."

"Maybe," his boss dropped a paper onto his desk, folded his arms to level Dennis with a look, the kind of look that said he didn't care if Dennis was a head taller than him, this was his jobsite and Dennis would do what he said, "But the men are gonna think you did and I don't want to have to deal with their crap. So go home til this blows over."

Dennis wanted to argue, to succinctly explain, to deny the thoughts tumbling down in his mind.

"Go now, Dennis, or don't bother coming back."

Dennis turned on his heel, and walked to the door.

* * *

_17 year old Casey Cooke._

It wouldn't stop. It beat itself into his thoughts with every step he took down the side walk. Dirt from his clothing scraped into his skin, and itch was beginning beneath the surface.

He had done it again. Touched what he shouldn't, been what every man back at the site thought he was.

Maybe they were right. Maybe they had been right about him all along. _Dirty and broken and not to be trusted._

He was spiraling, into panic and shame and cold, unsettling logic that laid out what he needed to do. Barry was his priority and Casey had threatened that. That ended now.

* * *

Casey was coming out the kitchen, bringing Barry a drink when the door opened. It was too early for Dennis to be home. But when he stepped in her body jolted with her heart, Thoughts momentarily expanding with a warm kind of surprise.

Barry looked over his shoulder, pushed off of the couch.

"Dennis, what are you doing home already?" He went to greet his brother, worried that something had happened. He was still wearing his dirty flannel, had not moved further into the apartment. He was tense and staring at the place Casey stood, deadened ice in his eye.

Casey saw his look and felt the stirrings of fear, of embarrassment.

"Dennis?" she whispered, a timid question.

She would never forget the look in his eyes. That cruel lack of anything but cold. So different from the way he had looked at her before, so foreign from the fire he had traced from her veins. He faced her down and settled her into his entire focus, intent on speaking those two words that would tear Casey from any illusion of security she had managed to scrape together during her time here.

She would never forget the way his voice sounded when he spoke.

"Get. Out."


	17. Known

"Uh, Dennis? What's going on?"

Barry's voice was remarkably calm paired with the anger in Dennis's eye. Somehow it made it all feel less real. Like this wasn't actually happening. Casey had stepped back again, into that worn place she could watch reality from.

"She has to leave." Iron gaze moved, focused on his brother, "Now."

"Why, Dennis." Barry was getting angry now. It was wrong, his voice felt strained. Casey didn't like it. Sounded unnatural.

"Because she lied to us, Barry."

When Dennis's voice went that quiet, you felt it in your bones. Like that shift in all creatures of prey that could sense when power coiled nearby. Cold was taking over the numb. Casey blinked at the ice in Dennis's gaze. The stunned silence was wearing off, replaced with one horrified thought.

_He knows._

"Lied about what?" Barry snapped, eyes switching to Casey in surprise, still too annoyed with Dennis to be suspicious. Casey's gaze pled with Dennis's. A 'wait,' a 'I can explain,' filling her own. Dennis's stare was like glass.

"About everything."

Barry watched Dennis shift, his arms folding in that stance of his that could be so unbelievably irritating because Barry had learned long ago that when Dennis was like that, nothing was getting through. Casey was mute. Mute, and pale, and her wide eyes had not left Dennis like she knew _exactly_ what Dennis was talking about. She looked scared. Barry didn't like that, didn't like seeing her drawn back and scared, facing down that rigid force of his brother's. It wasn't right.

"Her name isn't Casey Williams. And she can't stay here. She's seventeen years old."

There was a lot of things Barry was prepared for. That wasn't one of them.

"Okaaay," Barry drew it out, giving himself time to think. "Is that true?"

He only had to look at Casey to confirm it. Her face broke his heart. "Why did you lie, babygirl?" He swore her eyes glossed over.

"That doesn't matter." Dennis spoke before Casey could, and Barry grimaced. Did he always have to sound so logical?

"How does it not matter?" Five minutes ago he was hanging out with Casey and totally relaxed, now his sweet girl had lied to them all and Dennis was trying to kick her out. _All_ of it mattered.

"The police are looking for her, Barry. She has to leave before they find out we have an underage girl living with us."

His voice was calm; bombs dropped from a quiet sky. It felt like those scenes in those ridiculous action movies, after a massive explosion when they cut out all the sound except for that slight ringing, and the ragged sound of breathing. Casey could hear her breathe.

"No." It was one word, barely spoken, and the ringing stopped. Casey was stumbling forward. "The police? Dennis, what did you tell them?" Her fingers gripped his arm, felt how tight his body held. She searched the eyes that wouldn't look at her, "Dennis, _what did you tell them?"_

He shook her off. Like dirt on his sleeve, he roughly pulled his arm out from under her hand. His gaze never left Barry's, never looked at the desperation in Casey's eye.

"Why, Casey, what did you do?" Barry was staring at her now, confused, hurt maybe, but there was kindness there in those eyes. It blurred behind tears that covered Casey's gaze.

"Babygirl, what's wrong?" Barry tried to come forward, but Dennis's body moved, turned as his arm came out to stop his brother. Casey stood just behind him, caught in his shadow. A memory flashed of her running from Barry in the kitchen, clinging to Dennis's shirt as she hid behind him like protection. How similar to how they were standing now. But comfort was beyond Dennis and would never make it past his cold shoulder.

"It's my apartment, Barry. And I say she goes."

His hand was on Barry's shoulder, and the younger brother shook it off, angrily, eyes snapping, face so full of emotion that Dennis would never show. But Casey knew that wasn't quite true. She had seen Dennis's eyes lit with something that should be too powerful to feel, something uncontainable that belied the control in his hands as they pressed into her. In the memories of 2am and she had felt Dennis _feel_. His hands had been steady and his eyes had raged.

So different from that night that felt so long ago. When his blank eyes had peered over hands pressed into her throat, a night filled with fear that the passing days had made her forget. It was a moment beyond who Dennis was, caught in a dream, memories. And she remembered then, the story that Dennis had told her. The truth of his history at work. How one drunken night he had made a mistake that would haunt him forever. A drunken touch had started it all.

But it hadn't been Dennis's. That girl in that bar had known what she was doing, lied and taken advantage of Dennis. Pursued her own selfish desires without ever caring about the consequences Dennis would have to face.

Casey had known that.

She knew. The guilt Dennis carried, the shame and fear that he would never escape the name he had made for himself. She _knew._

Barry faced Dennis in evident anger, Dennis was braced to take it all. His decision was made.

Casey understood. Dennis would always protect Barry. No matter what. Dennis would protect him from Casey.

Because she had known, and she had done the same thing. She had betrayed the only sense of security she had ever found, and she hadn't even thought about it. She had done what she had wanted and not thought a second past those moments. She had dug into his strength and held on because it had made her feel in ways Casey hadn't known was possible.

She had used him.

Because she hadn't just wanted Dennis's strength.

Part of her had liked that it was wrong.

She had had an outlet for her curiosity. A way to deny the truth just a little bit longer. To ignore that something broken had trembled in the dark part of Dennis's gaze, and there was a hidden part of Casey that was just a little bit drawn to it.

Casey knew her heart, it wanted to understand darkness, to burrow deep into the black and find that shred of light to cling to. Years spent staring at the man who as supposed to love her like her father would have, trying to find it somewhere, that part of her uncle that she could look up to, that she could love.

Dennis had spent days walking by her side, becoming a friend, and companion. A welcome break from thought. He hadn't forced brightness into the room like Barry did, he just held with a quiet kind of warmth. It had taken Casey a while to notice it, to feel it. She had thought he was cold. But he had built into something Casey looked forward to being near. She could have gone to them. Could have asked, maybe, explained. Told them the truth. Trusted them with it.

But Casey had let herself spiral, get drawn to the dark. She had pulled Dennis with her. It didn't matter that the police were looking for her. She knew, she had feared they would be. Her uncle wouldn't stay quiet for long. She had known this was coming. But she could not pull them in to the mess she had made. Her fingers had stripped away any chance she had when she had betrayed Dennis and Barry both.

"I'll go." She was nodding, chin trembling. "Just, please, what did you tell the police?"

He still wouldn't look at her. "Nothing."

She looked at Dennis and she understood, he hadn't told the police she was here because he was afraid of what would happen. A missing seventeen year old girl found living with a man who has a history with underage girls. He would lose everything. He would lose Barry. She wanted her secret kept, but not like this, not out of shame.

The thought had played in her mind, as she drifted off to sleep last night, that maybe one day she would be safe, protected. She never considered that it would be Dennis's protection keeping her secret safe, just not for her. It was protection for his brother. Dennis would lie for his brother. Casey would leave for them both. They deserved to be as far away from her mess as possible.

* * *

It didn't take her long to pack. Still so few belonging, crammed into boxes. Barry tries to get her to talk, Casey won't. He didn't need this, to be drug into this anymore. She's turned cold and Barry walks away hurt. Dennis is a shadow of a ghost. A presence completely removed.

She left her lamp in the center of her floor.

The hall echoes with the sound of her footsteps, of broken trust. She stops beside Dennis's door. Her hand hovers, to knock, to apologize for hurting him how he had been hurt before.

Casey doesn't knock.

It's harder, somehow, when she steps out into the outer hall, than when she had left home. This time, she was leaving somewhere she felt safe. but it wasn't safe to stay anymore, not for them. She was the danger. This time the monster that had chased her out, was herself.

Her phone buzzed in her hand after she had called for a cab. Barry's name flashed on her screen.

-I don't know whats going on. You ever want to explain, ill listen.-

Casey shut her phone, and waited for her cab to take her to somewhere she hadn't figured out yet.

* * *

The apartment was filled with hollowed out silence. Dennis sat in the chair in his office, staring at the books before him, at the glasses settled carefully on top. His chest expanded with slow, indrawn air. Trying to calm.

His door banged open.

Barry had never barged into his room before, but he was here now.

"So what, is she a serial killer or something, because that is the only reason I could think of that would justify kicking her out like that!"

Barry was in full 'Jade,' mode, the kind when his voice found cadences Dennis hadn't fully known where possible for a grown man to express.

Steepled fingers pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to shut out memories of her eyes.

"She ran away from her home."

Barry was silent for two stunned moments.

"And, and you think _that's_ a bad enough reason to _kick. Her OUT?!_ She didn't do anything!"

"She's seventeen, Barry." His voice sounded tired.

"Exactly, Dennis. You just threw her out onto the streets to fend for herself like she was some kind of criminal. What if she needs help?"

There were times, in the surrealist moments, that Barry would remind Dennis of their mother. When his eyes would flash and his hands would move with every nuance of every word. It only happened when Barry was furious, and it never failed to make Dennis want to bury every moment of the past. She didn't get to touch Barry like that, influence actions that didn't belong to her. Barry had gotten out, he wasn't hers anymore. She had given him up. It wasn't Barry's fault he had been shaped by vague memories and genetics. It was odd. These times, when Dennis would see his mother in Barry, were the moments he thought he loved his brother the most. It laid out every time he had ever failed his brother, reminded him of all the ways he still had to try.

"Do you not realize how it would look."

Barry rolled his eyes, dropped onto the edge of Dennis bed to glower at his brother. "Yeah, I get it could look bad at first, but we would just explain. We didn't know, Dennis. And it's not like anything happened, she was just staying here. We could explain."

"No." Dennis's denial was immediate, "They would never believe me."

He sounded so entirely certain.

There were times that Barry would look at his brother, and no matter how hard Dennis tried, he couldn't keep the truth from his eye.

Barry stood, eyes narrowing as he faced his older brother. His voice wavered with an almost frightened edge of anger.

"Dennis…." Dennis winced at the tone in his brother's voice. Suspicion. Disgust. He had heard it before, too many times, but never from Barry. " _What did you do?"_

* * *

Casey stood in a dark, dull room, slowly surveying the walls of the run down motel. It was cheap, kind of place people didn't ask question, the kind of place that payed by the hour. But it was near her work. It accepted cash, and they didn't really check for id. It was the only place Casey could find.

Boxes hugged the wall in an uneven line. The over head light had a bulb out. Everything was dim and cold and… empty. It felt like the place hope had been.

She didn't know what she was going to do.

She pulled out her things, but didn't put them away, just left them accessible. She would live out of her boxes until... until what? She squashed that tiny, ridiculous thought that had begun to whisper _until they let me come back._

What was _wrong_ with her?

* * *

Barry was staring in accusation and dread. It frightened him, the shame in Dennis's eye. He'd seen it before. Dennis would come home from work sometimes, worn, ashamed. Barry had thought maybe he was embarrassed about his OCD, that the guys in his job gave him a hard time about it. But he had wondered, in the back of his mind, if there hadn't been something else, something more that Dennis wasn't telling him.

Dennis settled into himself, arms pulling a little bit closer into his side, posture tightening, pulling together.

"I didn't know she was underage."

Barry rolled his eye, "Yeah, Dennis, neither did I. That's the point."

"No," Dennis shook his head, "Not Casey."

Barry gaped in tightening shock as Dennis told of the girl in the bar, how the men from his job saw him as guilty to this day. He heard the shameful secret Dennis had kept locked inside for five years.

"If they hear about this, they will assume the worst, and I will lose that job. We can't afford that, Barry."

"So you're telling me," Barry hopped off of the bed, so angry he couldn't keep still, he couldn't not move. His hands found the arm rests on Dennis's chair, smaller frame crowding his brother. He knew Dennis didn't like it when people got that close. "That you kicked Casey out when she might need help because of some stupid mistake you made years ago? She didn't deserve that!"

Dennis hardened his jaw, his gaze, locked out his brother with an ease that always a little bit worried Barry. "She lied, Barry. She lied because she knew if we knew the truth we would never have let her stay."

"No, I can't believe you're being this selfish. I've put up with a lot from you Dennis, But enough is enough. How could you do this?!"

Barry's anger fractured the careful expression in his eye, and part of Dennis latched on to the need for Barry to understand, to realize Dennis did this entirely for Barry. He didn't want this. Heaven knew he didn't want this. He didn't want her gone, her touch to be a lie, him and Barry to be left together and completely alone. He tried, for the first time he tried to tell Barry just a piece of what was locked inside.

"I was trying to protect you."

Barry scoffed, Shoving away from the chair. "Well you can't. And you never could."

Silence prevailed as Barry strode away, the door slamming breaking it only for a moment. It held, and sucked the air from Dennis's lungs. He didn't realize his hands were shaking until his fingers splayed across his chest, trying to ease the tightening there. His shirt scraped as his hand moved over it, catching on the edge of scars, pulling at their half deadened skin around them, like a vacant touch of pain. Scars that traced his failures into his skin, a constant jagged reminder so that he would never forget that he shouldn't be here. The wrong brother had been taken too long ago, and no matter how many times his skin was split with that rusty blade, fate never made it right. it never corrected its mistake. He failed and he lived and others paid the price.

He would do what he must for Barry, to ensure he got the chance at life he deserved. Barry wouldn't be more scar tissue. Dennis had to make sure of that.

He had to.

* * *

Casey went to work. She stayed until end of shift, clocked out, went back to a dark motel. The days had warmed but her walks were cold, empty.

Her nights were worse.

It had almost been a week now. Strangled dreams and exhausted days, the illusion of routine her only chance at sanity. No officers showed up at her work.

No one else did either.

Every lingering glance she gave to the door as she clocked out thrummed like shame in the pulse in her wrist. She could _feel_ it, that sudden crash off of stupid hope. She had done this and it was pathetic of her to look, to care, to want to catch some glimpse at the memory of strength, to imagine falling in beside and walking with the very man she had betrayed.

She wanted to say she was sorry. She wanted to say a lot of things.

Casey stopped talking. Nothing more than necessary responses to the girls behind the counter. They didn't notice, not really. They talked to be heard, not to listen. The silence stretched and filled Casey's insides, taking up the empty room and filling it with nothing. This way she could pretend to be whole.

This way she could pretend she was okay.

* * *

Barry didn't talk to his brother for an entire week. He would leave the room when Dennis entered, pointedly check his phone when necessity forced them to share the same space. Barry didn't hold grudges often, but when he did he was uncomparable.

Dennis accepted the silent anger. He let it weigh the air around him, let it seep in. Let it pull him in to that downward spiral. The kind that wanted pain. The kind that didn't want to be fixed. Atleast he knew he deserved to feel this way.

He did what he could to work and move on and forget. He wanted to forget. Not the shame, no that wasn't what was torturing him. That he could live with. That he would always live with.

It was her. Memories of warmth tore at his insides, like hunger that couldn't be met. She had hollowed out a place here between them and now there was a vacancy. Barry noticed, sent Dennis looks that reminded them both that he was responsible. It lay like dust against Dennis's skin. He couldn't bear it.

He needed to come clean, to be clean. He could never erase Casey from his skin. He didn't want to. But he needed Barry to understand. He wanted a chance to make this right.

His glasses set on the edge of his dresser. He remembered the night he had been given them, when he had caught Casey going through his things. Her surprise, her emotion. She had said that he needed to tell Barry. That Barry thought he didn't care.

He couldn't tell him. He knew his words better than that, he would never find the right ones.

Slowly Dennis stood. He lifted the box from its place on the floor. Carefully he opened it, removed the top folder filled with the most recent receipts. This wasn't about this. He wanted Barry to know he had tried to be a part of the life they had been separated. Maybe, if Dennis showed him, he would understand. Maybe?

* * *

Barry looked up from the couch as Dennis slowly entered the living-room. He set the box on the coffee table before him.

"What is that?" Barry asked, curiosity getting the better of him. Dennis straightened, stepping back.

"The truth. I know I mess up, alot. But, I did try."

Barry looked like he wasn't going to reach for the box, determined to still be miffed with Dennis. But Dennis knew his brother well enough to know that there was no way Barry wasn't going to give in. With a disgruntled sigh, Barry opened the box.


	18. Done

Barry stared at the papers before him. Scraps and photos and highlights of his life. Some he remembered, like that cheesy science fair project. Others he didn't really. But how did Dennis have them? Some of the articles felt oddly familiar. His foster parents had the same ones, pressed between clear pages of a scrap book, carefully detailing each little accomplishment in his life with pride that felt too big for the occasion. They had one for Jade, for the foster children they had had before. Because that's what parents did. They kept mementos of the little things, celebrated the memories. They cared.

Dennis had a box full of memories carefully tucked inside. How long had he been collecting them? Dennis would have been a teenager at the time of some of them, during the years Barry still wrote but he never responded. If he cared enough to look for the honor role when it was posted in the back section of the local paper, why hadn't he bothered to answer even one lousy letter?

It didn't make sense. Maybe Dennis cared, just at a distance. Wanted to keep tabs but not get involved. It was more than Barry had thought. It was something, at least.

But was that really supposed to make him feel better? That Dennis had sort of tried? What, was he supposed to be grateful?

Barry was angry, and confused, and didn't want to look at these papers anymore. Didn't want to wonder what it meant. He didn't want a reason to stop being angry with his brother because to be honest anger was a lot less stressful. Casey hadn't answered any of his message he had sent. He was worried about her. About the girl who had lied, run away from home, and apparently had the cops after her. He could just not even deal with that right now. He went to class and avoided his brother and now Dennis wanted to drop all this in his lap and just walk away.

Well he wasn't in the mood.

Barry stood, dropping the folder he held back on the pile beside the box. He lifted it and carried it back down the hall, intent on giving it back to Dennis and just dealing with this later.

Much later.

He swung Dennis's door open without knocking, still annoyed. Dennis wasn't in his room. Barry dropped the box on his perfectly made bed and turned to leave. Two folders caught his eye, sitting slightly askew on the end of Dennis's desk. Like Dennis had dropped them in a hurry. It was glaringly obvious against the perfectly angled objects around it.

Barry saw his name on the top folder. The same clean label on all the other folders, but dated much more recently.

He wasn't even thinking before he snatched up the folder. He opened it too roughly and papers tumbled out, knocking into the second folder, sending them both to the ground. With some inelegant flailing, he managed to keep ahold of about half the papers as what looked like scraps floated out from the second folder. He bent to collect them before Dennis returned, wondering why on earth Dennis would have a folder full of trash. It was the most un-Dennis thing Barry could possibly think of. He plopped the folder he still held open on the floor beside and the mess and began scooping the paper bits into it. Briefly he considered that he was likely just making a bigger mess. If Dennis had really kept trash he had probably done something bizarre, like alphabetized it. He had half of the pile picked up when the first document in the open folder snagged his attention. It had his school's logo on it.

Frowning, Barry shook the paper free, sighing as more scraps floated back on the floor. He gave up trying to pick them up then. They just belonged there now.

Barry began reading the document, mumbling the words aloud.

"Mr. Crumb. This is confirmation of your payment towards Barry Crumb's account made on June..." his voice trailed off as his eyes sped through the rest of the document. This didn't make any sense. Why was Dennis paying his school? He tore through the folder, taking in each paper, each receipt dating back years. All of college. Events before that. His class trip. He remembered, getting called into the office, told his trip was paid for anonymously, after being so disappointed when he thought he couldn't go. He had always thought his parents had been the ones, that they had just wanted to surprise him. He had thought their surprise was an act. But no. It wasn't them. it was Dennis.

"Barry."

Barry's head snapped up. Dennis stood in the doorway Barry had left open, eyes taking in Barry sitting in the middle of his floor, surrounded by papers and scraps. Dennis's room had probably never been so messy. Barry tried to explain. "You paid for my class trip," came out instead.

Dennis's eyes hardened behind that stupid wall. "You weren't supposed to find that." He frowned at the paper in Barry's hand.

Barry rolled his eyes, letting the paper drop dramatically, float towards the pile, disturbing the smaller bits it landed on.

"And why not? Why shouldn't I know. Dennis, I-" Barry scoffed, shaking his head, fighting the childish urge to call Dennis a big dummy like he had done as a boy.

"You thought I didn't care." Dennis supplied it like easy fact. His gaze was cold. It unnerved Barry sometimes, just how weird Dennis was. He had never quite figured him out.

"Well, I mean," Barry began to pick up his mess _again_ , looking for something to do. He wasn't usually down for awkward conversations. Especially not with Dennis. He could talk to Jade sometimes, and Casey had been an easy listener. Not that she had done much sharing. "I just didn't know what to think."

He scooped up little piles and plopped them in the folder, almost able to _feel_ Dennis wince each time he did it.

"Ok, seriously Dennis, what is this." He waved his hands at the mess, "Why are you keeping trash in your room like a psycho."

Briefly Barry thought of his own scrap pile in the corner of his room, but that was for _supplies_. Barry liked to hoard and reuse things. Dennis did _not_.

"It's not trash."

Dennis's voice was soft. Barry went a little still. Dennis didn't talk like that. Barry took a good look at what was in his hands.

Words scribbled in a childish hand, segments of paragraphs in disconjointed parts on wide lined paper. Barry frowned, unable to shake the slight feeling of recognition. A larger piece caught his attention, words half clear. "Rite back soon. Love, Barry"

There were moments, when you know that you realize something but you're not really ready to get there yet. No, Barry needed a second. Half a darn second to accept that these scraps of torn up paper were the letters he had painstakingly sent his brother for years.

"These, these are..." Barry didn't have words. It was an odd feeling.

"I never got to read them. I didn't want to throw them out."

_"Why?"_

Dennis shrugged, looking embarrassed, "You sent them to me, I didn't want to trash them."

"No, Dennis. Why did you do this?"

Dennis was blinking at him, an almost hurt kind of confused breaking through the cracks. It was a look Dennis had had as a child, when Kevin had gotten mad at him for breaking a toy and Dennis couldn't quite believe Kevin would think he had done something like that.

"I didn't."

"Well then who?" Barry climbed with more agitation than grace to his feet, shaking off bits of paper, "What, was it a crazy mail man? Neighborhood dog? Like seriously Dennis, who could possibly-"

Barry stopped talking. Dennis was closed off and staring straight ahead. Eyes refusing to answer, to give anything away. He didn't want Barry to know.

Why would he not want Barry to know?

"If, if it wasn't you," Dennis's face gave nothing away, "Then, did, did Mom do this?"

Barry felt the twist, he wondered if it could be, then he was shaking his head, "No. No there's no way. Why would mom do that, this is crazy."

He began pacing, but every where he went to step, there were papers on the ground. He gave up trying and just stomped through them, out from the mess to the clear side of the floor. Dennis stared at the pieces beneath Barry's feet.

"Dennis." Barry came to a flustered halt in front of him. One hand went on his hip like a scolding parent, the other pointed at the pile on the floor. "Tell me who did that."

Dennis was silent, but resignation was building behind regretful eyes. Barry _needed_ to know. He had seen the letters and now there was no going back. They had passed the point where truth became necessary because to half know was so much worse.

"She said she was protecting you."

Dennis talked easy even if the words were hard. Barry drew back in confusion.

"Protecting me? How does doing _that_ to my letters protect _me_?"

The words grew more difficult, he paused before each one, "If I couldn't respond, it kept you safe, from me."

Barry's got a little bit too wide, he took a half step back out of more shock then anything, "um., Dennis. _That doesn't make any sense_."

Dennis was still fixed where he had half entered the room. Barry was always a little bit amazed at how Dennis could just settle in to wherever he was standing. He didn't get antsy, need to move, to sit. Barry did.

"Mom wouldn't do that." He paced on the clear floor. "They wouldn't let me contact her directly. I wrote her notes in my letters to you. Did she read them, before she-" Barry glanced at the destroyed letters on the floor, "No," he shook his head, ended up seated on the edge of the bed, "You have to be wrong."

"You weren't there, Barry." Dennis sighed, his arms uncrossing, hands finding his pockets. It was an oddly relaxed looking stance, but it held more resignation than anything.

"No," Barry hopped off the bed, "I _wasn't_ there, Dennis. That's the point. I got taken away and you're telling me that our mother ripped up my letters like they, like they were. Ugh, I'm done. I can't handle this conversation right now. You can find me when you're ready to make sense."

He shouldered by Dennis, intent on storming into his room and letting his door slam behind him.

"Barry." Dennis's voice stopped him. He didn't turn around, but he paused.

"What." He snapped, angry. He heard a sigh, the long kind.

"You weren't taken away."

Barry spun around, honestly wondering if his brother had completely lost his mind. Dennis had stepped into the hall after him, was looking down at the floor of the hall. Shoulders hunched forward just slightly, posture uncertain. It was an uneasy look on Dennis and Barry did not like it.

"What are you talking about?" Barry sounded less annoyed then he wanted to; his voice cracked just a little.

Very slowly Dennis made himself meet Barry's gaze. He hadn't wanted this, had meant for the secrets to stay slipped inside their folders, hidden. He had given Barry part of the truth, the proof that he had wanted to be involved. To defy Casey's echoing argument that Barry thought he didn't care. He had wanted to take strides.

Barry had started an avalanche.

And Dennis was tired. Selected words that crafted distance had only gotten him so far. They had lost Casey already to lies and necessity. Barry didn't understand why. Anger still simmered. Barry didn't realize and maybe he needed to.

Barry was a good man. He had had strong parents, a good sister. He would solid, strong, could handle maybe the weight of the past. But he could not handle half answered questions. That would drive Barry insane. His mind worked to erratically to not spin theory after theory. Barry needed the truth.

The truth Dennis had spent most of his life protecting Barry from. But what did you do when protection itself began to cause harm.

Dennis decided, simple fact. Maybe it was the only way out of this mess.

"You weren't taken, Barry. You were put up for adoption."

Two beats of silence.

Then Barry took a swing at him.

It cracked across Dennis's jaw and he let it, tasted the blood on his tongue. His shoulder rolled as he readjusted, his face turning back to look at his brother. Barry was staring with flames in his eyes, his finger leveled at Dennis's face.

"You are out of your friggin mind."

Barry stomped out the apartment, let the door bang shut behind him.

Dennis was left alone.

* * *

Casey was bored. Stupid, right? After everything, the betrayal, the lonely nights in this filthy motel, she figured she could come up with a better emotion than that. But no, everything dulled behind the boredom. Her room was empty. Her walk between work short and lonely. Her boxes still unpacked.

She read through Barry's messages. Not too many of them. He was trying to be respectful of her silence. But the heys, how are yous, and are you okays were a comfort to read. Proof he didn't hate her, not yet anyway.

She wondered if maybe Barry just didn't know what she had done to Dennis. She couldn't imagine Dennis explaining it. Did they miss her at all... did he?

Casey rolled her eyes and pushed off the bed. She was being pathetic. One week left and she would be free. The police couldn't force her back home once she turned eighteen. One week in this stupid room and she could go anywhere she wanted.

Except the place she really wanted to go. They wouldn't let her back there. She had burn that bridge with a fire she hadn't known how to contain. Put darkness into the eyes that would not leave her dreams alone.

She wanted to apologize. She wanted to go back to how it was before. She wanted to be another person entirely, the kind who didn't make stupid, selfish mistakes. She wanted to be a lot of things, but nothing would change what she had done. There was only waiting, waiting for this week to be over.

* * *

Detective Dunn was tired. Long days on his feet looking for answers no one had. He had worked a lot of missing cases. This one was bothering him. It wasn't just that it was a young girl, they were always the hardest. It was that he couldn't shake the feeling that absolutely everything he had come across so far had been just a little bit wrong. Her uncle was worried sick but didn't know she had dropped out of school over a year ago. He called her a troubled teen, and maybe she was. But troubled teens didn't just happen. They were shaped, more often than not by the people they acted out against. Her uncle seemed distraught, truly concerned. But something about it didn't settle right.

Nothing about this settled right. Like that man at the job site. Crumb. Nothing in particular had been wrong, there had just been something in the way the boss responded to Crumb, and the way Crumb didn't respond at all. There was tension there wasn't an explanation for, and David didn't like that. Maybe the man didn't know Casey. He'd shown nothing but brief recognition when he had seen the flyer. Almost bored. Like her only connection with the man really was dropping off his cell phone.

But why would a troubled, run-away teen bother to go out of their way to return a lost cell phone to its owner. It was a selfless act that could draw attention to her. Why would she do that.

Maybe he was overthinking this. Maybe Casey held some of the poor amount of kindness left in this world, and maybe she returned that phone because it was the right thing to do.

But if that was the case, why would she lie for a year and run away from home.

It didn't fit.

A sound at the door, and David pushed away from his kitchen table. He had forgotten the time, had meant to start some type of dinner, but figured they'd be better off ordering pizza. The only thing Joseph liked that he made was pancakes, and they had had that two weekends in a row.

Door swung open and his son came in, dropping his backpack by the door. He wandered into the kitchen, pulling the fridge open,

"Hey dad," he spoke behind the fridge door, grabbing a soda.

"Where ya been, you're late." Dunn tried to straighten out his paperwork, make some room for Joseph to sit down. He only had him some weekends, and he didn't want work getting in the way.

"Yeah, I stayed after school, there was a line to sign up for try-outs."

"Try-outs for what?" he looked down the table as his son pulled a chair around backwards and sat down, giving him a half-amused look.

"Football."

David Dunn rolled his eye, "Joseph, you know your mother doesn't want you playing."

Joseph shrugged, "I haven't told her yet."

David gave up. He had learned a long time ago to pick his battles. He waved a hand at the phone on the wall,

"Whatever, call in some dinner. We can talk about this later." He stood and started carrying his folder to the living room.

"Sausage or pepperoni?" Joseph asked, pushing away from the table.

"Both!" His dad called over his shoulder.

Joseph put the order in and wondered into the living room to see his dad at the desk in the corner he never actually used except for when he cleared off the kitchen table. Curious, Joseph glanced at some of the papers his dad held, squinting a little in surprise.

"You're on the Casey Cooke case, now?"

His dad glanced at him, "Yeah, you went to school with her right?"

He watched his son shuffle his shoulders, the way he always did when he was trying to hide something. Joseph might not be half bad at football, but he would be a terrible poker player.

"Yeah, uh. I did. Few years ago though. She doesn't go to school anymore. But I guess you knew that."

David hummed a little in acknowledgment, looking at the papers in his hand, letting his son talk himself out like he always did, wondering what on earth Joseph knew about this case that was making him uncomfortable.

"Any luck, so far? Finding her, I mean."

David shook his head, "No, and to be honest I'm worried."

Joseph shrugged a little, stuffing his hands in his pockets, "Well how do you know she's not fine. Maybe, she like, found a place and she's cool?"

David Dunn leveled his son with a look, "Joseph. What do you know."

His son sighed, eyes getting a little pleading, "Look, I saw her, okay. But at first it was before I even knew she was missing," he hastened to add, trying to explain himself before his dad had a chance to yell at him.

"She has a job and she doesn't seem like she's in trouble or anything. And she didn't seem keen on going home. And I was kinda a jerk to her, so I didn't want to mess that up for her. I didn't know you were on the case, Dad. And really, I think maybe she's fine, just wants to be left alone."

David Dunn was moving back and forth between thought an anger. He finally had a lead but his own son had kept pertinent information away from the police in a missing persons case.

"That's not your call, Joseph. Her family is looking for her, you should have told me!"

Joseph's foot scuffed the ground, still half a little boy getting chided by his dad, but his shoulders squared up a little, proof he was growing up.

"She didn't seem like she was in trouble, and she had that guy looking out for her. I didn't feel right getting involved."

David forgot about scolding his son, and leveled him with a look instead.

"What guy."

Joseph shrugged, "I don't know," he protested, "He came by when I was talking to her. I couldn't remember where I knew her from and I guess I was being pushy. He was a big dude, like bald, works in construction or something."

He watched his dad rummage through poorly organized papers, pull out a paper with a photo on it.

"Is it this guy?"

Joseph read the name Dennis Crumb beneath the photo and nodded, "uh, yeah. That looks like him. He's bigger in person."

His father was too busy getting up from his desk and patting his pockets for his cell phone.

"You answer the door when the pizza comes. I gotta make some phone calls." He stopped before walking away, "And we're gonna talk about this later."

Joseph blew out a breath, plopping down on the chair his dad had just vacated. He felt half relieved and just a little bit guilty, and couldn't help but wonder what on earth was going to happen next.


	19. Yellow

"Will you let me explain?"

Dennis stood in the kitchen as Barry stepped around him making his coffee, intentionally ignoring him with an insistence that was getting annoying.

"You are being childish." Dennis stated.

"You didn't really know me as a child, Dennis. You have no idea what I was like." Barry tossed it over his shoulder at Dennis, like a casual reminder.

"Barry!" Dennis snapped, and Barry sighed, giving in, turning to face his brother.

Dennis was frowning at him, like he really shouldn't have said that, and Barry felt a little bad.

But Dennis had been saying some ridiculous things lately and he thought it was only fair to return the favor.

"I didn't know about the adoption either. She lied to both of us."

Barry groaned; did he never give up? He did not want to talk about this. "How did you find out, then." He asked, half a challenge. He saw Dennis hesitate and paused mid action of pouring himself some coffee. "Oh you started it now, Dennis. No point hiding something else."

Dennis looked almost embarrassed. His shoulders pulled slightly together; gaze dropped a half inch. Barry's curiosity grew despite himself.

"When I was eighteen I tried to get custody." Dennis never mumbled but that was pretty close to it. Barry's mouth moved like a startled fish,

"You, uh, you did what? Wait, of me?"

Dennis's gaze sharpened, a _yes, Barry, who else would it be?_ clear in his eye. "I looked into it and found out you had been adopted, not placed in foster care at all."

Barry shook his head a little, trying to jiggle the thoughts around so they made sense. He glanced down and remembered the coffee pot still in his hand, set it down distractedly.

Dennis had tried to get him?

It was stuck in his mind, that one thought, before a wave of others crumpled it. What if it was true? What if his mother had really given him up?

Barry had never switched foster homes. He knew other kids who did but he just thought he was lucky. He had never considered, never knew. His foster, uh, _adoptive_ parents never talked about the process with him. He had asked them about his mother and they had said they weren't allowed communication.

The thought made Barry swallow. He had thought his mother hadn't been given rights to communicate with him. But if she had done this, that means she had _chosen_ it. Not chosen an open adoption. She could have had contact. Visits. _She could have not given him up in the first place._

"Why. Dennis, _why_." Barry's hands slapped the counter as he leaned over it, head hanging as he thought, tried to make sense of it all.

He pushed off from the counter, pacing now. "Why would she do that?"

Dennis hadn't moved, was watching his brother with even concern. "She said she needed to protect you. From me. That you weren't safe around me. That's why she didn't let me have the letters."

Barry scoffed, hands spazzing through the air, "Why would I not be safe, Dennis?!" His voice was raising steadily, too controlled to be yelling. The way Barry got when he was deeply frustrated.

"Because of Kevin." Barry stopped pacing. Dennis made his words continue. "What happened was my fault."

Barry shook his head, "No," his body started moving again, "Don't say that. It was terrible, but it was an accident. I was there, Dennis. I remember."

Dennis's arms crossed, "I was supposed to be watching both of you. You don't understand, you were a child at the time."

"So were you!" It exploded out of Barry, a build-up of push back to everything Dennis had been saying. Barry was losing his hold on his nerves. "He fell, Dennis. He fell because he tripped and he cut himself. It could have happened to anyone."

"I was responsible, Barry." Controlled reason in Dennis's voice grated against Barry. He didn't like when people could be so calm when he was agitated. Couldn't they feel it too? That ugly crawl of energy beneath their skin that needed an out? He was tempted to throw dirt on his brother just to get him to _move_.

"Yeah, you were. And you did everything you could. I may have been young, but I _remember_. I remember you carrying him home, Dennis. I remember you coming back and getting me when I was too scared to move. Kevin died because he got sick, and Mom couldn't get him help in time. There's no way she could blame you for that."

But the look in Dennis's eye told Barry that wasn't true.

It was a look, half sheltered, half revealed that told Barry there was so much more that Dennis wasn't telling him.

* * *

It was almost time for break, and Casey was sweltering. She thought maybe she was coming down with something, couldn't breathe in the abnormally warm café. She was intending to take every moment of her fifteen-minute break outside, hoping Ashlyn wouldn't follow. The woman had randomly remembered "That hunk that had come to see Casey a few weeks back" and was asking all kinds of questions. Casey wasn't in the mood for reminders or hope or _anything_ that had to do with that conversation.

She stepped out the instant the clock struck 12:15. It was warmer now. Tolerable jacket weather. Spring really was coming. And so was her eighteenth birthday. 6 more days and she would be free. Just six. More. Days.

Casey sighed, leaning back against the edge of the building, and closed her eyes to the sun, to the people milling about. To everything. It struck her at the oddest times, the memory of touch, of warmth, of quiet contentment. It was unreal how much she missed it.

The minutes ticked past and she considered maybe she should get something to eat, but she didn't want to give up her freedom yet, to go back in. She stayed out.

That was a mistake.

"Caseybear!" The voice was loud, and entirely too close.

Casey's eyes snapped open.

Her uncle stood not five feet away, a huge smile on his creased face, uneven hair erratic in the wind. Casey was blinking, once, twice, uncomprehendingly.

"Uncle, Uncle John?"

Her foot moved, confusion wrapping around every thought, simple surprise making her body shift forwards. She took a step towards him before realizing.

"I have been looking everywhere, girl. You had me worried sick."

That gleam in his eye, expression friendly but something sick lay behind. People were staring. Casey was frozen. Her uncle was still smiling.

"I woulda never believed Mitch when he said his wife saw you working at some hoidytoidy café, but here you are. Come on, lets go home."

Meaty hand came out, her uncle took that one step forward, and Casey broke.

Her feet pounded pavement turned white in the sun. Her uncle's calls turned to harsh curses after her. Two blocks to her motel. She could make it.

The undeniable sound of a rusty engines rattling to life had fear clenching her throat and she gagged as she ran. But the streets were full of lazy traffic and her uncle was kept just behind, calling out the window at her. Faces turned as she passed them in a blur, expression of shock, interest, nosy confusion.

"Come on, Caseybear, don't be like this. Get back here."

She ran. Her side hurt but she ran. Her heart beat too fast and her sweat felt chilled in the newly spring air, but Casey ran.

Traffic stopped at a light and she gained ground. A glance over her shoulder showed her uncle's truck still in sight.

He was watching her. Eyes fixed and she could _feel_ the hatred pouring through his windshield. He would make her pay for making him chase her.

She neared the motel parking lot, but reason shouted No. She couldn't. She'd lead him right to where she stayed. She needed to lose him. To get away, then double back, get her things and disappear.

But there was nowhere to go. Traffic was thinning as she crossed side streets. Her uncle would have an open stretch soon. She needed somewhere close, somewhere safe.

Somewhere. _safe_.

She wasn't thinking anymore. She was just running.

Sidewalk turned to gravel underfoot. Casey ran through the orange netting fences. The sound of tires spinning on gravel sounded over the machinery.

A nearby worker saw her, half caught her arm as she fell.

"What in tarnation."

It was the man she had seen before. "Please," she gasped through the stitch in her side, told her fingers not to cling to his arm, "I need to see Dennis."

"Caseybear!" It hit her like a physical blow and Casey's body jerked away from the sound of her uncle's voice. She spun to face him, breaking away for the man beside her.

Her uncle was approaching, hands up, shooting the foreman an apologetic smile.

"Hey there. Sorry bout this. That's my niece there. She gets a little excitable. I'm just trying to get her home."

"No," she stammered it, stumbled backwards. The foreman was looking between her and her uncle, confused. She clung to the doubt in his eye. Maybe he would help.

"Hey wait a minute. I know you. You're that missing girl," He was pointing his radio at her, nodding as he made the connection. Others were looking now. Yellow construction hats were making a ring around them and wildly she looked for a familiar face.

He needed to help her.

But.

_Why_ would he help her. After what she did.

This had been a mistake.

"Casey?" Rough surprise held in the voice behind her, but Casey didn't care. She choked on a surge of relief that caught her off guard, spun desperately to face him.

Dirt was smudged across his cheek. Shirt stained with what looked like oil. Eyes fixed with a look Casey had never seen before. It wasn't anger. It wasn't confused relief. It was somehow a tangle of a dozen sharp reactions all melded into one hard stare.

"What are you doing here?" Her heart lurched at the soft callousness of his voice, the way he was gravitating to her.

"Crumb, what the hell are you mixed up in now." The man beside Casey snapped. She heard her uncle go to speak, couldn't pay attention to his words. Dennis hadn't taken his gaze from her, but he answered the man.

"I'm not sure what's going on, sir."

"The kids just dramatic." Her uncle insisted, "I'm sorry to interrupt. Casey, come on, let's go,"

Casey's gaze was pulled back to her uncle, her chin trembling as she shook her head No.

"Casey, stop being ridiculous and let's go. You're causing a scene."

"She doesn't want to go with you." Dennis's voice was steady but it carried. For the first time her uncle seemed to notice him there and Casey watched him straighten, watched his eyes go cold.

"And what have you to do with my niece?"

"Dennis, you said you didn't know this girl." The foreman sounded angry. Casey was tired of being pointed at with a radio. " _Whatever_ this is I want it off my job site. Back to work!" He stared down the men surrounding them, leveling Dennis with a gaze, "That goes double for you, Crumb."

The others shuffled, moved reluctantly out of their semi-circle. Dennis didn't move.

"Crumb, Get back to work or you're done here!" He sent her uncle a harsh look, "Get your niece out of here before I call the cops for trespassing."

Her uncle made a move forward, Casey stumbled back. Dennis held his ground.

"I mean it, Crumb, you got about five seconds."

"Come on, Caseybear. You're gonna make him lose his job. Stop being a baby and lets go home. You're embarrassing yourself."

Casey shuddered through a breath, maybe she was. Dennis couldn't lose this job, she knew that. He had told her how important it was, she couldn't risk him that.

One more week and it wouldn't matter.

She could go back, just for another week. Then she could leave and he couldn't stop her.

It, it wouldn't be that bad.

"Crumb!" The foreman's impatience was tangible.

Casey took a tiny step towards her uncle.

Warm fingers closed on her arm. She felt solid strength behind her.

"Casey," his voice was just in her ear, "why don't you want to go with him."

Casey's face turned to look up at him, caught in the cove his body made as it barely curled around her. Her lips trembled with words she didn't have. Her eyes showed the same war Dennis too often kept locked behind impassive doors. A single tear trembled.

"Sometimes he hurts me." They weren't words, just shaken breath of sound, but Dennis understood. Torn steel filled his eye. He moved and her tear fell. A solitary drop from shaken eyes as Casey watched something incomprehensible.

Dennis caught her uncle by the shoulder, propelled him back until he slammed against his truck door. Her uncle was a large man but Dennis had caught everyone off guard.

"She's not going with you."

The foreman was shouting, and Casey winced away from the sound. She couldn't blink away the scene in front of her. Her uncle struggled against Dennis but his forearm moved, closed over his throat, pressed til his air was closed off Casey could see the fear in her uncle's eyes.

It frightened her. That wild, dangerous look of a base creature begging for oxygen. The foreman jerked Dennis back, annoyed, shouting at him to get off of his job site before he called the police. Her uncle met her gaze and there was murder in his eyes. Dennis didn't look at either man.

He didn't look at Casey. But when his fingers closed around her wrist she felt their heat against chilled skin. When he gave a soft tug, her feet moved to keep place beside him. Dennis walked between her and her uncle but her eyes trailed, stayed fixed on the man who had haunted her life.

His gaze tracked itself onto her skin, a promise of revenge, for the embarrassment, the trouble she had caused. He was not done with her.

Dennis shifted and blocked him from view. Casey's gaze blinked and stumbled away, fixing on the gravel turning to pavement before her. She heard Uncle John's voice, raising in damage control. The apology, so reasonable and easy. He could wrap anything up in his favor, the apologetic victim.

Casey was cold.

Dennis didn't speak. Street passed in a blur. The musty air of the apartment hall. Dennis was opening the door. She stepped inside.

Clean light fell through windows, her eyes swept over the careful angles, spotless surfaces. It was still exact.

No dank air and questionable stains, no cold shadows that crept from the corners and on to her bed. She had forgotten how perfect it was here.

"Casey." He spoke behind her and she started, shoulders hunching, turning slightly to face him.

Reason meant there would be questions, explanations, listed reasons of hows and whys but Casey couldn't. Right now she couldn't tape the words together and string them up like those crappy decorations they had made in school.

She needed space free of thought and fear and the repetitive irritation of closing her eyes and seeing his face. She needed a break or she would break and Casey wasn't willing.

She approached and guarded eyes watched her, came to look down at her as she stood just in front. He was rigid and filthy and looking at her like now was the time for facts.

Dennis wasn't ready to deal with the realization of what he had witnessed. He had put together the pieces easily enough; abused teen flees home. Calloused words so common anymore they aren't even news enough to reach the headlines. Distance let him consider facts without seeing her, without seeing _Casey_ hurt and alone, without letting his thoughts trace bruises over her hidden skin, wonder in what ways her uncle had hurt her. He couldn't do this, do anything other than know, possess the knowledge without thought, feeling. But each fact tangled and he was left in its dark web.

She shifted closer, arms held against her sides, eyes blinking just past his own. Wary, uncertain. Alone. He needed answers but he could not ask the questions. She heaved a tiny sigh and just one unsteady request.

"Later?"

He understood and nodded, accepting that she wanted time.

Time he needed to sort his own broken thoughts.

He nodded again, felt the grime of his shirt shift against his skin, grimaced.

Her eyes softened. "Go shower, Dennis." Quiet understanding, reminders that she knew him, the quirks and stiffened mannerisms she had come to know.

Just as he had learned her… thought he had learned her. But Casey had secrets and Casey had lies and they had cost him his job.

But even as he thought it, as he left Casey standing in the living room and went to strip away the remnants of his job from his skin for the last time, he couldn't be angry.

In that moment, facing the fulcrum of his decision, to walk away from the girl who had lied and keep everything he had built so much to protect, or to lose it all for a lost girl with secrets in her eyes, it hadn't even been difficult.

He would have to tell Barry. They might have to move. There were consequences to his reigned in action of pressing air from the lungs of a worthless man. There was a chilled part of Dennis that had enjoyed it. That liked being bigger. He wasn't a little boy anymore. He couldn't be bent beneath rusty blades. He could face monsters and put fear in their eyes.

But there was a part beneath the surface that didn't care about the fear, didn't care about the shell of the man who had been before him, too hollowed out with pathetic weakness that he would lay his hands on Casey. He didn't matter. All that mattered was Casey walking away.

This wasn't over. There was a resounding circle of thought turning in his mind. Anger for Casey chased anger at Casey, tripping over stupid relief. That she was here again. That she now walked his quiet hall. That maybe there was a reason for her lies. Lies that were a threat his own actions had nullified.

As he stepped into the shower, one logical thought replaced the rest.

He couldn't lose his job twice. In a sense there was some relief in that.

* * *

Casey paced forward, gaze moving aimlessly around, awkwardly left standing. She was afraid to move, to touch what wasn't hers anymore. She wanted nothing more than to sink onto the couch and curl up. Her head swam and her skin felt warm. There was nothing to do now but wait, wait for Dennis to face her again.

She realized then. She was standing in the place she had been a week ago, the last time she had seen Dennis. When he had told her to get out.

She tripped forward and let herself move to the couch, settle carefully on it. Like you do when you're awkward company in a home too nice to touch. But the familiarity of it wrapped around her, and slowly she felt herself relaxing. She moved through the events of her afternoon slowly, considering them, but not very deeply. She wanted to check first, make sure it had actually happened before letting it hit her.

It was amazing how easy it was for things not to feel real.

She remembered then, moments spent here, in this living room, in the shadows. Quiet conversations and still shared silences. That brush of unexpected kiss.

It was amazing how easy it was for other things to feel nothing but real.

The sound of the door opened and Casey bolted to her feet.

Barry stepped into the apartment.

"Casey!" He spotted her and bounded forward, letting his bag and jacket fall haphazardly on the ground. He knocked into her a little to exuberantly, hugging her half kilter, pressing her head to his chest like a dramatic mother.

"I never thought I'd see you again!"

He pulled back, looking her over, eyes darting over her features, "You look pale, beautiful of course," he hastened to add, "But Casey, are you okay? What happened. Why are you here?"

Neither of them were prepared for Casey to start crying.

It was like a switch was flipped and everything rushed over her in a wave. Barry gasped and pulled her close and rubbed her back as she cried.

She was spent before long. She didn't have the energy to sustain her tears. Barry settled onto the couch and tugged her down beside him, wrapped her tight to his side.

"Tell me what happened, babygirl." He brushed her hair from her tear tracked face and gave her a smile that held warmth Casey craved. He was a balm like fluffy comfort but in the back of her mind she wondered if she could really break against Barry. If he would ever withstand those tears, that anger. If she ever finally faced the darkness that surged up inside, she wondered if Barry should be anywhere near her at all.

"We should wait for Dennis," she spoke it quietly, breath wavering.

Dennis's voice came from the hall. "I'm here."

Just a simple acknowledgement to her statement but the words felt deeper, hit Casey harder. Dennis was here. She watched him take in their position, Casey half curled in Barry's lap, features still traced with obvious tears. He came into the room and stopped some feet away, settled into his stance, becoming a wall that Casey wanted to lean against.

She wondered what he would do, if she stood up, crossed to him, and tried to lean against his side.

She wondered, but she knew she didn't have that right. She had lost all claim to friendship, to anything from him.

She had cost him his job.

That realization sunk in. She felt her eyes widen, an edge of panic. She had done exactly what Dennis had feared her lies would cost him. She had brought about the very reason Dennis had kicked her out in the first place.

"Dennis." Her voice sounded frantic. "I'm sorry. Your job. I didn't mean, I shouldn't have," Barry was hugging her, quietly asking her to calm down, telling her it was okay. Casey felt swallowed by shame. Dennis watched her over his brother's shoulder.

"Casey," He spoke it on a sigh, a way to prepare to face this. To accept it. Something almost gentled in his eye. Barry missed it but Casey saw nothing else.

"It's okay."


	20. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I previously posted this chapter I somehow left out a few paragraphs. Not sure how I managed that, so sorry for any confusion! The edited paragraphs are right after Casey says she will be 18.

"What about his job?" Barry asked, looking back and forth between the two in total confusion.

Dennis spoke the words he had always feared he would have to say to his brother. "I lost my job today."

"… what happened?" Barry was split with concern right down the middle. Casey was upset, but now Dennis had this happen and he didn't know who to help first. Casey was near him so he just held her tighter.

"It was my fault," voice muffled by his sweater and Barry pulled back to look at her.

"How, doll?"

Brown eyes blinked away a thousand unshed tears, stared at him with thoughts and regrets welling up inside, unable to find a place to begin, to explain. Dennis moved, stepping to stand directly before them. Something cold came over his face, and when Barry's arms tightened on Casey this time it was because he had no idea what his brother was about to do.

"Casey." It wasn't gentle but it was low, calm. Eerily so. "Who was that man."

Barry _felt_ the shudder go through Casey. She wouldn't look at either of them.

"My, my uncle."

Dennis nodded once, jaw a tense line as his teeth moved against each other, swallowing his grimace. He asked his questions with granite in his eye.

"He's why you ran away from home."

A tiny sniffle. A nod. Eyes still fixed on the worn wood floor. Barry was silent, piecing together enough in his mind to know to hold Casey and let this play out. What this had to do with Dennis's work, Barry had no idea. But it wasn't hard to figure out why a girl would run away from an uncle at home.

"Your parents, where are they?"

"Dead." The word thumped hollow, empty. "He's my guardian."

" _Casey_ ," Barry murmured, hand rubbing her back, but Dennis breathed through another question.

"How long?"

Her shoulders shifted a little, arms folding over her stomach. "Since I was six."

He let her answers fill up the space around everything she wouldn't say. She doled out simple facts and let those cold eyes fill in the gaps. It was easy, simple. She could shudder without breaking.

"How did he find you."

Her eyes widened then, lifted in a panicked memory and they locked almost audibly with Dennis's, like an echo of silence. Barry felt the change in her, the urgency, the fear. Body reaching for comfort it couldn't find.

"He came to my work. A, a friend of his saw me there? I think. I, ran but I didn't want him to know where I've been staying. I panicked, Dennis, and I knew you were close. I shouldn't have come there."

It was making sense now, how Dennis had become involved. Casey had run to him. It felt funny, that thought in Barry's mind. That Casey had run to Dennis for protection. The angry man who had thrown her out. Who had hurt Casey once in an act of sleep walking. It was natural for Barry to look at his brother and see obvious safety. He had never thought Casey had come to see it too.

"You did the right thing, Casey." Odd words from Dennis. He meant them, yes, that was obvious, but they were flat. A grouping of words he thought he was supposed to say, when there was no way he was finding words for the thoughts passing inside.

He was detached. And Barry realized that Dennis had stepped back into a place where he could function without control, because he was a breath away from losing it.

It was Casey. It had to be. The thing that was pushing his brother to that place right before brokenness. It was Casey hurt and Casey scared and Barry didn't know he was crying until Casey wiped at his tears.

"I'm okay, Barry. I was just scared." Lips moved in a brave smile, eyes trying to reassure _him_. She was calm now and he was broken.

"I'm sorry, Casey. I'm so sorry. We'll help you. What can we do? The police?"

Dennis and Casey both visibly flinched at the word.

"No, they can't do anything Barry." Casey murmured and Barry argued back.

"But if you tell them. They have to help you, Casey."

She wouldn't answer, tried to breath in so that she could breath out. Arguing with Barry was like arguing with that stupid voice of hope in her mind.

"Barry." Dennis was reason. "She's a run-away. The police will send her back to her guardian."

Casey let her eyes tell Barry it was true and she watched the horror flood his expression. So openly shocked and horrified. So _caring_.

"So. So what do we do, I mean, Dennis?" He looked at his brother and Dennis looked at Casey. It was a question that plagued the very air.

"Dennis?" Barry repeated, needing an answer, a solution. _Anything_.

A sudden knock sounded at the door.

Each looked at each other in surprise, no one moving.

It sounded again, much louder now. Whoever it was wasn't going away.

Dennis sighed, looking at his brother, "Stay here."

He answered the door.

Detective David Dunn stood in the hall, sharp eyes fixing on Dennis.

"You lied to me."

* * *

David Dunn shouldered past the man in the door, ignoring the hard expression, keeping his tone casual.

"It took me a while to find you. You don't seem to have your address listed at work. Might want to correct that." His gaze took in the entryway as he walked. Taking note of the discarded bag and jacket on the floor, like they were dropped in a hurry, out of place in their pristine surroundings. The hall was clean, _very_ clean, especially for a construction worker. Dennis Crumb had walked around him, too calmly, placed himself between David and the end of the hall. He was looking at him now with that same blank expression he had had when he had seen the flyer of the missing girl and swore he didn't know her.

"Can I help you?" It wasn't threatening but it wasn't friendly wither.

"Casey Cooke," the detective said, catching the micro-reaction in the man's eye, the way he tensed just slightly. "you said you didn't know her."

He stared but wouldn't answer. Of course this wasn't going to be easy. "A witness saw you with her." He added, and Dennis Crumb nodded.

"She was returning my phone."

The detective nodded, casually stepping forward and watching the way Dennis moved to block him from entering further, but in an easy way. Like a coincidence.

"Yes, but I'm not talking about then."

Caution flickered in his eye, but otherwise no response. The apartment itself was quiet. But the jacket lying beside David Dunn's foot looked too small for Dennis.

"You live alone?" He changed the subject, turning around like he was no longer interested in seeing the rest of the apartment.

"No." Dennis answered simply. At David's questioning look, he continued. "My younger brother lives with me."

"Hmm," David nodded, rocking back on his heels. "Is he home?"

"Why." Dennis's voice grew clipped. Eyes faded into a shallow look. Defensive. Calculating. David had come here ready to accept a simple explanation. To not assume malicious involvement but Dennis Crumb was giving him nothing to work with.

"Maybe you don't understand the situation, Mr. Crumb." Dunn dropped all pretense of casual civility, "I have a missing seventeen-year-old girl that you were seen with, twice, and you've already lied to the police once. Now you can tell me what you know and help me out, or you can tell me what you know at the station," His hands moved to the cuffs on his belt, "Your choice."

Dennis's eyes settled into a look of worn acceptance. They kind that you feel in a place beneath your bones when right doesn't look very different from wrong and pain is nothing more than exhaustion. His shoulders moved, rolling slightly, chin turned just barely, resisting the urge to glance behind him. It was natural, in moments like these, to look to the thing you fear losing most. Detective Dunn knew then that Dennis's brother was home, and was likely just in the other room. But Dennis kept his gaze from turning and very simply he held out his hands.

"Okay." Dennis waited for the cuffs. They clanked as David moved, honestly not expecting to have to use them.

"No!" a voice that was most definitely not anyone's brother came from the end of the hall, And David Dunn's attention was snapped towards it. He understood then that it had not been his brother Dennis was avoiding glancing towards.

Seventeen-year-old Casey Cooke stood in the middle of Dennis Crumb's apartment.

David's gaze went to Dennis, shocked and more than a little annoyed. He watched Dennis's eyes slide closed, jaw work at getting caught. But when his eyes opened they held the kind of promise that gets sealed in stone somewhere.

"She's not going back."

David Dunn blew out a breath. He looked past the man in front of him and fixed the frightened girl with a look, "Young lady. You need to tell me what is going on."

* * *

Casey sat at the kitchen counter, fingers turning the glass of water in its place. She had agreed to talk. He was an older man, with eyes that were intelligent before they were kind. But there was kindness there. He stood across from her, notepad in hand as if by habit.

She knew Barry and Dennis stood behind her. Not wanting to leave her alone. She swore Barry was half afraid that the detective would swoop her out of the door when they weren't looking.

It was ridiculous.

Part of Casey was afraid of the same thing.

"So, Casey. Can you tell me where you've been these past weeks."

Casey swallowed, it was a simple question but the answer could get Dennis and Barry in trouble. The detective sensed her hesitation, glanced up with a stern look. "This is only going to work if you're honest."

Casey sighed. "I found an advertisement, a room for rent. I lied. Told them I was Casey Williams, that I was nineteen. They believed me; they didn't know." Her voice had grown earnest and she swallowed, telling herself to back off. Don't make it obvious she was afraid of them getting in trouble. That would mean there was a reason they should be in trouble. A drunken reason that was all her fault.

"I stayed here. Got a job. They didn't find out how old I was until Dennis was told, at his work."

The detective nodded, knowingly, and Casey frowned, "That was you?"

He nodded, "I've been looking for you for a while Casey. We take missing person cases seriously."

She flushed, looking down. "I didn't mean to cause any trouble." Fingers played with her water glass. The detective let the silence hang to see if she would continue. Nervous people talked.

Casey was silent.

"After Dennis found out, what happened."

Casey's gaze never left the counter, "He told me to leave. He was angry I had lied to them."

Pen scratched on paper. She heard someone shift behind her. She knew it had to be Barry.

"Do you know why Dennis lied?"

"Excuse me?" Casey blinked, confused. He had asked it so casually.

"He said he didn't know you."

Casey colored, but she left her gaze even with his. "He was worried, about what it would look like. Didn't want him or Barry getting in trouble. It was my fault," she continued, "I lied to them. They didn't know."

Detective Dunn nodded as he wrote, easy like. As if she was describing an un-interesting pencil.

"Why are you here now, Casey. If he made you leave, how are you back?"

Casey swallowed. Lids closed and eyes opened. "My uncle showed up at my work. I didn't want to go back with him so I ran. I knew Dennis would be at work and he brought me home, here." she corrected, "He brought me here."

Eyes regarded her thoughtfully, taking a moment before asking, "And why did you not want to go with him."

He knew it wasn't an easy question. His tone made it sound simple but when he looked at her, Casey knew he understood, at least suspected. But this wouldn't be like it had been with Dennis. He wouldn't let silence spell out the facts. No he would need them. Lined up and gone over a thousand times. Truth scraped bare til it was meaningless.

She couldn't do it. She felt them behind her and she couldn't hurt Barry with her words. He would get so upset, hearing it. Knowing what had happened. She didn't want him knowing.

Casey looked slowly over her shoulder, spotting him there just beside the open door. His eyes were wide but he nodded at her encouragingly, tried to smile.

"Barry," she said it softly, "You don't have to be here for this."

"No, Casey, it's okay. I want to be here for you." Sincerity burned in his eyes, but so did his fear. For her. For everything she had faced.

"Barry." Dennis spoke softly, "we should go."

But Casey's gaze snapped to his and Dennis understood. She didn't want Barry to have to hear this. But she couldn't do it alone.

It was the same look she had had in her eye when she had pressed her fingers onto his shoulders and begged him with her lips to stop the pain. It was selfish need at his expense and she tried to be stronger than that, be better than that. But Casey could only be so much and right now she was losing pieces of herself in every line that the detective would write down.

Barry frowned, but relented with surprising ease. He pressed Casey's shoulder then slowly left the room, assuming Dennis would follow.

Dennis watched him go, then stepped up behind Casey. He gave her a silent nod to continue.

The detective was thorough. When, How. How many times. Ask, and ask again. Casey's wooden voice knocked each peg of her story in place. Every detail was like splinters in Dennis's mind.

It was one thing to imagine the world of horrors she could have lived in. It was another thing to know. To hear a thin voice use words it should never have to. To watch the man hearing them nod and write, nod and write. Like this wasn't _wrong_.

Like it wasn't Casey, but a subject. What Dennis had always swore he would never be. He heard Casey admit dark secrets and knew what it was to watch strength he would never have.

He could never do this. Casey never broke.

* * *

David Dunn set his notebook on the counter, feeling heavy sickness in every breath. He had known. Part of him had realized it would be something like this.

"Casey," he began carefully, "Are there any scars? Did anyone ever see any marks, bruises. Any injuries that you explained away at the time?"

Casey shook her head. Casey almost wished she was scarred. Her uncle made sure there was never any proof. Left marks that fade from the surface but never from underneath. No evidence, no validation against her skin.

It ate at her. The what ifs. If she had spoken up a long time ago. When there was truth. If she had been braver sooner. But she had been silent.

Silence let him hurt her.

Would it matter, now, that she was silent no longer? Or did words only matter for so long. Did their affects fade like bruises on carefully selected skin.

The detective sighed.

"What now." It came from Dennis, and Detective Dunn looked up. He met a gaze that didn't have the patience for hope and best-case scenarios. He wanted answers as they were. Without thought. Without feeling.

"Legally, I report this. We make a motion for a restraining order. But realistically, she's been labeled a troubled kid, they might not believe her."

"They'll send her back."

Silence, a tight sigh, "We don't know that."

"No," Casey's voice wavered, hands laid flat on the counter as she stared up at the detective, "No, I can't go back there."

"Casey," he began, trying to calm her, but she was angry now.

"You're supposed to help people! Isn't that your job? You can't take me back there. I won't go." She climbed off of the stool, unsteady, anger making her tremble. The detective moved, to support her maybe, but Dennis was suddenly in between them.

"She is not. going. Back."

"Don't start with me, Crumb," Detective Dunn snapped, trying to de-escalate Casey, to find a solution to an impossible situation that held pitfalls everywhere he turned.

"Six days," Casey was muttering it like a lifeline, backing out of the kitchen. "I just need to hide for six days."

Dennis turned to her, catching her arm before she could run, setting her in his gaze.

"Casey, what's in six days?"

She blinked at him, dazed, thoughts and plans and panic running behind her eyes.

"I'll be eighteen. They won't be able to send me back."

* * *

Detective Dunn stood in an immaculate kitchen, waiting for Dennis Crumb to come back from telling Barry to sit with Casey. He couldn't believe he was even doing this. The law was clear but so was reality and he was caught somewhere in between. Sometimes he wished he could act, before the law, before the violence. To find and stop before the broken system ever got involved. Without proof a troubled teen's accusations held little weight. It didn't matter that David believed Casey; the system didn't care without proof.

Dennis stepped into the kitchen.

"Wait." He said it without preamble, without politeness even, "Give her six days. Then she can give her statement without having to go back."

Dunn sighed, letting the heels of his hands settle on the counter, "And what happens in the meantime?"

"She stays here." He spoke it like the words didn't affect him. Like he wasn't caught in a tangled web he couldn't work out if he tried.

"That's not happening."

"Why not." Dennis asked evenly, and Detective Dunn didn't even try for tact.

"I'm not leaving a vulnerable seventeen-year-old girl alone in the home of two men I don't know if I can trust."

It hit him, hard enough he blinked, tried to show like he didn't care. But those were hard words for a man who feared that very statement.

"She's young. And she's scared. She's in an easy place to be taken advantage of." David Dunn continued.

"I would never-" anger pushed the words but he caught them, jaw working against them. "What other option is there." He removed himself back into a place of reason, "Taking the chance they'll throw her back with her uncle?"

The detective frowned. He didn't like it either, but right now he did not like the look of the man standing across from him. He didn't trust how effortlessly he had lied before. David Dunn could usually trust his instincts but in this situation he couldn't determine which way to go.

There was a sound in the hall of the outer door being opened, a woman's voice floated, loud and annoyed.

"Uh, helllooo. I've been calling for like an hour. Someone needs to learn how to use a phone. You realize I had to walk here?"

Jade stalked into the kitchen, an irate reminder that they had completely forgotten to get her from the airport. She stopped at the sight of the officer in the kitchen, looking startled.

"Did something happen?"

Her voice had carried enough that it had drawn Barry's attention, and he popped into the kitchen behind Dennis.

"Jade! I'm so sorry, I forgot. We, uh," he gestured vaguely at David Dunn, "We've been busy?"

Casey peeked in behind Barry and Jade started, "Casey! Girl, Barry said you weren't gonna be around this time. But you're here!" Jade stepped forward impulsively, pulling Casey into a hug. Barry hadn't been very forthcoming with the why of Casey having moved out, but she was pleased to see the girl. She pulled back, holding Casey at arms length.

"You alright? You look…" Jade trailed off, thinking Casey looked a bit of a mess, but didn't think hearing that would help the girl any. Casey looked a bit blankly at the others, not fully focusing til met Dennis's gaze. It was obvious she didn't know what to say and sharp worry built in Jade's mine.

"Alright, look," she turned to look at her brother, "someone has got to tell me what's going on."

* * *

It should have taken longer. Summarizing everything that had transpired should not have taken only minutes. It felt cheap. Like they must have been forgetting something, not emphasized something enough. And yet every sentence Casey had to listen to felt too long. Too many words, too many half stated facts to avoid really mentioning things. Jade picked up what was happening pretty quickly, reacted sharper than Casey had thought she would. Dennis had contained himself. Barry had been subdued, maybe out of respect, not wanting to hurt Casey more with a bad reaction. But Jade let out a string of profanity that left Casey a little impressed.

"You can't seriously be considering sending her back, are you insane?"

It didn't matter that he was a detective, or that they had only just met, Jade lit into David Dunn. "Just let her stay here. It's six days. I'll be here for most of it. You can lose your friggin paperwork for that long. We're not even asking that much."

David had, in his line of work, learned the art of getting screamed at, but this hit a little closer to home, this case quickly becoming more than just facts to him. It was getting harder to argue against something he found himself wishing he could just do.

"You'll be here?" he repeated, and Jade sent him an indignant look.

"Why does that matter. But yes. For about four days."

David Dunn knew it didn't really matter. But having that third person, this irate woman here while Casey stayed with the two brothers was enough to tip the scales in David's mind.

"Fine." He sighed, hoping he wasn't making a mistake. "But Casey. You come in to the station in six days. And if you need anything, for _any_ reason." He sent the others a hard look. "You call me. Immediately."

It was a shallow nod, but Casey looked willing, and Detective Dunn let himself out. He did not feel great about this. But it was better, it seemed, than the alternative, and six days wasn't all that long to wait.


	21. Known

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Somehow in my previous chapter a few paragraphs got deleted without my noticing. I caught it within a day or two and posted an updated chapter but for anyone who hasn't seen it yet, it's right at the part where Jade comes in, near the end.   
> Sorry for any confusion!!

There was a bustle of kindness, of care. Jade and Barry calm but sensitive, asking does she need anything. Telling her she's safe now. Casey was grateful, but after about five minutes she wished they would just forget. Not forget, really, but start acting normal. Throw some jokes around. Order pizza. Act like they don't know. Like Dennis.

Dennis, who had heard every embarrassing detail, moved through the room like the world hadn't shifted. He wasn't careful or gentle or overbearingly kind. He behaved as if nothing had happened. Like he hadn't gotten fired. Like he hadn't held her uncle by the throat and walked Casey to her only chance of salvation. Like he hadn't faced down Detective Dunn and was willing to walk out in cuffs rather than have the police find her there. Dennis was a wall of carefully constructed nothing and Casey just wanted to sit next to it for a while and feel the alone.

No questions, no touches, no half hesitant glances. Cool silence. That's what she wanted. But Dennis went down the hall.

Jade and Barry had other ideas. They moved on to distracting now. Talking and forced cheer, they were trying so hard. Casey excused herself. Said she was just tired. She forgot her things weren't here any more, that her room would be empty now.

Her shadow walked the hall before her. It passed Dennis's door and then stopped, waiting for her to move. She knew calm would be inside. That she could borrow it. He would probably let her. But it wasn't fair to him and one of these days Casey was going to start caring about that. Acting in ways that showed that mattered.

She noticed then, the crack in the slightly open door. Dennis had not latched it all the way and she realized that for all his show, Dennis had been distracted.

Fingertips pressed just enough to open. A sliver of room came into view through the crack.

Dennis sat at his desk, and it took her a moment to understand what he was doing. Scattered pieces of one of his model figurines was on the desk before him and his fingers were moving, sorting order in the chaos. Arranging and selecting each little piece, rebuilding.

His entire focus was on pieces he could put back together again. Pieces that looked jagged but fit so perfectly once you found where they belonged. There were no missing parts, no worn edges that wouldn't quite go. This was brokenness he could form into clean perfection.

She wondered then, at all the figurines she had seen lined up on his dresser. She had assumed they were done as a hobby. For enjoyment. Now she considered the opposite. That they were for the moments when Dennis's life fell apart and control was stripped from him, he could find it at his fingertips. He could narrow his focus and see only each item coming together in front of him.

Maybe it was a stress relief. A way to get through the broken times. She remembered all the figurines lined up and her heart ached realizing how many of them there really were.

Dennis didn't hear the door, didn't feel her gaze. But as his fingers worked and his brow pinched she watched him scowl and rub his eyes. He reached then to the drawer to his left, pulling out the pair of straight black glasses without looking away from the pieces in front of him. He brought them to the dresser, but his hands held before he put them on. His eyes fixed on the glasses she had given him, brow lowering, staring at them as if they were some reminder. She didn't know of what exactly but his hands began to shake.

Breath built to a panicked edge before his right hand fisted white, the glasses clattered to the desk top as his hands scrubbed over his eyes. Then with a sigh, his body calmed. His back straightened in his seat. Dennis reached forward and selected the glasses, slipping them on. He returned his attention to the pieces in front of him. Casey slipped quietly away.

* * *

"Well you're gonna need your stuff, Case." Barry was saying, he had come to find her after Jade had reminded him that Casey had moved out and hadn't left anything here. "If you tell me where you were staying we can go get it."

A thousand 'what ifs' surged to her mind. What if her uncle knew where she had been staying. What if he was waiting. Watching. Ready to find her again. What if she sent Barry and he got hurt. What if they led him right back here. She was tempted to say just leave it, there wasn't anything she needed. But that wasn't true. Her money for one thing was still in her room. She couldn't just leave it all.

"Look, you don't gotta come. We'll go, load it all up, and be back in no time. You can hang here." Jade added, picking up her jacket like it was decided, shooing Barry towards the door.

"Just need an address and a key, hun." Barry held out his hand, and Casey relented. She relented the what ifs and the fear her own thoughts were building. Her uncle didn't know where she lived. Her job hadn't known. He couldn't find her.

But she had told herself that before. And he had shown up in the afternoon sun like a relentless shadow. If shadows could grip and pull you into the dark with them. If shadows could slip like oil against your skin and stay there, impossible to wash away. The kind of shadows that winked out light.

They waved and hollered good bye and promised again that they wouldn't belong. Quiet shut the door behind them and Casey stood in it. This wasn't the kind of alone she wanted to be.

She moved just for something to do and settled on the couch. But she didn't like it, sitting with back to the empty space. Exposed in a pristine room that was too empty. She heard a door shut down the hall, and Casey popped to her feet.

* * *

Dennis felt the breathe move his chest, just a fraction away from a natural pattern, but if he focused he kept it even. It hadn't helped. He turned the completed figurine over in his hands, missing that breath of relief when it was completed. It usually helped. When something threatened to shake him out of the place of control he could always find it here. But not now. He moved through the pattern of his day but it wasn't enough. No now every thought was followed with echoes.

He hung his shirts from the dryer.

_You're done here, Crumb._

He folded his work clothes and set them in a box at the back of his closet.

_sometimes he hurts me_

He stood in his room and stood unseeing at the door. Tremors threatened and he forced them back. With a sigh he twisted the handle with more force than necessary and entered the hall. It took him a moment to realize he couldn't hear Barry or Jade anymore. Neither of them operated in silence, and he wondered if they had gone out. If they had taken Casey with them. That would be like Barry, insisting an evening out could erase anything.

She hadn't gone out.

She stood at the end of the hall, arms wrapped protectively around herself, eyes settled with too much intent on him. There was silence and there was each other, with stretching space in between.

Dennis couldn't cross it, speak the pleasant 'how are you,' hear the scripted, 'fine.' It was a useless conversation he couldn't have.

He saw the shadow of fear. That desperate look for hope. Like she just wanted it to be over. To breath and forget.

Forget the memories listed to the detective in their kitchen, now etched in detail in Dennis's mind. Forget that she had been stripped of what it felt like to be human, that so much had been taken from her she was left rattling alone in a calloused shell.

Forget that someone had hurt her in unimaginable ways.

Dennis couldn't forget, but he could pretend. He could face her like it was nothing. Asking if she was okay was a reminder she wasn't. Dennis didn't say anything at all. He turned and stepped back into his room.

Casey stood at the end of the hall, blinking at the place his shadow had been.

* * *

It took them a surprisingly long time to be back with all her things. They were shoved in the corner of her pale grey room and left for her to sort through. She sat on her floor, pretending to do just that while the others readied for bed. But her hands didn't reach for any boxes.

There was no point unpacking. She would only be here for six days. They'd let her stay until she was safe, then she would have to find somewhere else to go.

Barry wouldn't like it. He'd probably try to convince her to stay. He didn't know why she couldn't.

Casey knew.

It was an odd thing, having everyone look at you like you were the victim, the poor thing in need of help. Innocent. But she wasn't, was she.

She had taken and used and hurt and hadn't once considered what it would do to him. It confirmed what Casey had known inside all along. There was something wrong with her. Her uncle would have never hurt her if she hadn't in some way deserved it.

She pushed up from the floor and stepped into the dark hall. Barry and Jade were behind closed doors. Casey's feet took her to the one place they shouldn't.

* * *

Dennis was not an emotional man. When emotions arose he stood to the side, watched them from a calloused distance, let them play out and die. He had learned long ago what it was to not feel pain. not feel broken. He had learned to _handle_ this.

So why couldn't he close his eyes without starting at the smallest sound. Why did his heart beat like it held anger. Why did his hands wants to close around something other than empty air.

He felt _wrong_. Like his body wasn't right unless it was doing something. Like his thoughts weren't real unless they were empty. He was usually pleased with his mind, mildly proud at how well he remembered. But he couldn't get it out of his head. Not just what she had said but how she had said it. Every detail jotted down as permentally in his mind as it had been written in Detective Dunn's notepad.

A new sound and his eyes snapped open. Definite footsteps and his body moved from his place on the couch.

Casey stood a timid silhouette in the darkness.

"You should have told me."

Dennis hadn't planned the words, hadn't prepared for the anger that suddenly flooded him, the way his body moved him towards her with an intent that should have frightened. But he couldn't stop thinking that maybe he could have done something. If he had known, she would have never run terrified from her uncle, that man would have never found her. He could not reconcile the simple thought that he had put her out there, into her uncle's path with no safe place to turn. He had let anger drive her out without considering what it would do to her. Barry had worried, Barry had said, what if she needs help. But Dennis hadn't relented. He had been cold. He had been callous and Casey had almost paid because of it.

"I couldn't have," Casey answered, voice carrying a strain, and energy to it that Dennis didn't like. It felt destructive. "I didn't want to involve you, and Barry, and there's nothing you could have done."

"If you explained why you lied, we would have understood. You could have stayed," Dennis argued with forcible reason. The kind that insisted with irrational superiority that it was being calm, that didn't recognize how strained its emotions really were.

Casey scoffed, arms folding, defensive, shifting back into scorn. "You didn't kick me out because I lied, Dennis. You kicked me out because of what I did."

She stared up with defiant eyes, daring him to refute it, to avoid the subject she had placed forcibly between them. But Casey didn't want to be pandered to with gentle concern. Casey didn't want to be soothed in weakness. Casey wanted to fight, and Dennis was an edge of unsteady emotion that she wanted to push.

"I knew about your past and I did that anyway, Dennis. I used you."

Casey wanted his anger, wanted to find that scorn in his eye, to be looked at as the broken, twisted thing she was because Casey didn't want pity. Pity was for the weak, defenseless victims. Pity was for the innocent. Casey had too much darkness inside."I made you be what you hated, Dennis. I did that."

Dennis stared down at her, angry now. "You didn't _make_ me do anything, Casey."

He should be angry. He reminded himself that he should be. She had used him, dirtied his hands and cost him what she knew he was afraid of losing.

Secrets couldn't be put back in the dark. He had discovered her lies but now he knew the reasons for them. She had gotten out the only way she could.

He could understand that. Respect it. But it didn't explain why her hands had reached for him, why she had pressed herself into his space. Held herself against him at 2am in a memory that would not leave his aching mind.

Her past could explain why she had lied but it would never explain why she had kissed him.

She had been irresponsible and selfish and had disrupted every laid plan in his life.

But he couldn't look at her and see that now.

He didn't see her brokenness, her stubborn refusal to be weak. He didn't see the fear or the anger or the shame. All he saw was Casey, soft and complicated with too much experience behind too young eyes. The lines of her face were small, thin but strong. That was the thing about Casey, she _looked_ delicate, but she would never be. Even in her fear she fought. She fought the shadows and clung to that impossible light, forcibly refusing to let it go out. Even when she didn't know it, even when she thought there was nothing left but darkness, she still held that edge of light in her eyes. Of hope. Of compassion. Of care. She shied away from her hardened edge, ashamed, so torn by the things it made her do, never realizing it was what made her so capable of accepting that rough exterior from others.

She walked that tattered line between hardened and healed, she knew pain but believed in life. Believed in doing better, being better. She was one of the few, who could be broken and only be more beautiful.

Casey watched the angry stance of him shift into an almost gentle calm. She didn't know why, felt panic that this wasn't going to plan. He should be furious with her. Angry and hateful and everything she deserved but the man who had towered over her in frustration now settled back into calm. His hands moved, not touching, but towards her. Memory flashed of her knocking against him in that train en route to shops with Barry. The way his hand had steadied her. So naturally. So simply. Casual unresisting strength, the only way Dennis knew how to be soft.

"You should be proud, Casey. Of telling the detective."

It was the voice that spoke them that broke her first. Low and just a little uneven, enough that she could hear how he was affected. It was the words that pulled her down.

She should be proud.

Of something she had done.

Casey didn't know how to be proud of herself anymore.

She had known all along that when the anger came that Barry could never be near it. His calm and caring soul couldn't bear these types of tears. They were harsh and mean and split slits in her soul as they fell. Dennis didn't falter back. His shadow moved and hands gripped her, warm and steady touch. It guided her til she was sitting, knelt in front of her, hands constant pressure on her arms. A shield with space between for Casey to fall apart. These weren't the kind of tears that could fall against someone. They needed room to implode. They needed room to die away.

Then pain replaced the anger and Casey hands sought against him, gripping into his shirt as her head fell into the hollow of his neck. She breathed in the scent of Dennis's soap, clung to the wall of him as Dennis shifted. He moved from kneeling in front of her and turned her easily against him, settled simply beside. She clung and he stayed in a still kind of silence and the feeling of panic died away.

* * *

Dennis stared into deep shadow and felt her curl tighter against him.

His hands couldn't hold her.

Shouldn't he have known? With her curled and safe and dropping into sleep all Dennis could wonder was how he hadn't known. Before, when his touch had traced lines he struggled to forget, why hadn't he felt it? Shouldn't people know when something isn't right. Shouldn't they be able to tell when they're doing something wrong? Were his own hands really so tainted that they couldn't feel that tinge of dark anymore? He hadn't known. It was all he could think, he hadn't known how old she was, hadn't known it was wrong. But the guilt didn't care about excuses. It settled and twisted and made his hands unsure of each other.

He couldn't hold her, but he stayed perfectly still as she clung to him, and let sleep pull her softer against him. He let his shoulder shift as her head rolled and he felt her breath on his neck. He let his own eyes close and his own body relax and he let sleep pull on the both of them.


	22. Malleable

Dawn brushed against the windows, stretching across the floor. Soft breath filled the room. Casey stretched, and her head turned in her sleep, she settled closer into the warmth. It moved beneath her, an even rise and fall of rhythmic comfort.

Dawn pushed and more light filled the room, Dennis moved as it touched him. Hands moved against the warmth against him, brushed softness and curled around it, pulling it tighter, closer as he shifted. His eyes blinked open as the warmth stirred. Casey opened her eyes.

Their gazes met and where she was registered, but Casey couldn't jerk away in pained embarrassment, he couldn't draw his hands back as if burned. There was too much exhausted warmth, too much simple comfort.

"Hey." She spoke it softly, blinking at him as she stretched, her hand steadying herself on his chest as she settled on to the couch beside him. A yawn followed and Dennis watched her, eyes soft in the new light. She didn't know if it was the shadows or her imagination.

"You're still tired." He stated quietly, and Casey scoffed a little.

"Aren't you?"

He frowned briefly, shaking his head as he blinked, "No, I'm usually up by now."

Was his voice really that quiet or was it the air itself, still waking up? Casey's voice was a scratched whisper, but Dennis spoke in full, low tones that were somehow falling soft.

"Oh," Casey stretched again, trying to wake up, but her brain had other ideas. It was not ready for daylight and she felt Dennis move from beside her, shifting off the couch to give her room.

"Lay down, Casey. Get some more sleep."

She obeyed, stretching out and settling back into sleep. Something covered her as the blanket that had been discarded last night was pulled over her and Casey fell back to sleep.

* * *

Dennis made coffee quietly. Everything he did was done with as close to stillness he could manage. He did not want to disturb her.

Wanted to ignore that she disturbed him.

His hands settled on the counter and he leaned over them with a sigh, thoughts from last night playing in his mind. Had he done it again, done what he shouldn't? Had that been wrong?

He didn't think it was. He didn't want it to be,

But he had long since learned he couldn't trust his judgement.

Still he couldn't find shame in any of those moments, couldn't look back on it and feel regret in any of his fingertips. Casey had needed someone and he had been there. Same as Barry had done for her.

But Dennis knew it wasn't the same. Barry hadn't traced gasps from her lips with a touch that went way beyond simple friendship. Barry hadn't crossed a line that could never be taken back. And now Dennis was forced to walk that confusing in between. It was consequences, he knew, of his own actions.

_everything you touch breaks, Dennis_

His mother's voice sounded without warning in his head and grunted harshly, bitter anger rising as he faced the truth of those words.

But then thoughts came of Casey sleeping, tears gone, relaxed and content. Memories of her safe and comfortable as she was buried into his touch, and Dennis considered, maybe not everything. Maybe not every time.

* * *

Jade came strolling out a while later, passing Dennis a look where he stood wiping the counter. He had been cleaning an already spotless kitchen for the last hour.

She went for the coffee pot. "Did I see Casey on the couch?"

Dennis nodded, setting aside his rag, folding it before placing it on the edge of the counter. His hands felt slightly raw from the cleaner, and he crossed to the sink to wash them. "She laid down after I woke up."

Jade frowned, "Probably doesn't want to be alone, poor thing. I tell you what, If I ever get my hands on her uncle," she set her coffee mug down with too much force and Dennis sent her a stern glance. She remembered Casey was sleeping.

"Oh, sorry." She pulled the cream from the fridge, adding it to her coffee, thoughtful, "I feel like we should have known, ya know? Seen it in her? I knew she was shy but..." She frowned into her coffee. Her eyes were sad.

There was something Dennis had always respected about Jade. She was kind. She didn't always know it, could be boisterous and a little uncouth at times, but she cared about the people around her. She had taken Casey in as easily as she had Barry.

"You weren't around enough to notice, Jade." Dennis supplied, and Jade looked at him thoughtfully.

"But you were, Dennis. Did you ever suspect...?"

And Dennis let himself consider. He tallied up the moments in his mind that were just slightly off. The way she would react at times, the look that would form in her eye. There had been evidence of something, but he hadn't known what. Hadn't wanted to pull out secrets she kept locked. It wasn't in Dennis to pry. He had seen the shadow in Casey but hadn't imagined there was a current threat.

He would never had told her to leave if he had known.

The sounds of stirring in the other room, and Jade went back to her coffee, pretending like they hadn't just been discussing Casey. Dennis dried his hands on a dish towel, eyes on the living room, unconsciously waiting for Casey to appear.

She stepped into the kitchen, a bit rumpled, still weighted with sleep. Her eyes found Dennis and she stilled, but there was a softness in it, a pause of relief, not of surprise.

"Hey." It wasn't very loud, Casey blinking as if groggy, but Jade watched the way Dennis moved, stepped forward without realizing, posture shifting into something almost _soft_. She couldn't believe it.

"Hey," he spoke back, just as quiet.

"Goodmorning, Case!" Jade saw Casey start, she hadn't come far enough into the kitchen to notice Jade and she blinked a few times.

"Oh, hey Jade." She looked caught in an awkward stance, cheeks heating a little and Jade had to wonder why. Dennis caught the change and frowned at Jade for startling her. Then shoulders shifted and he turned to lift a mug from the counter, filled it with coffee, adding cream. He offered it to Casey as Jade moved past him.

"What do you want for breakfast, Case? I can steal some of Barry's yogurt and make you a parfait?" Jade tossed over her shoulder as she rummaged through the fridge. Casey took the coffee from Dennis, not in a hurry to answer, to talk. Dennis slipped into a stool at the counter, opened his newspaper and without much thought, Casey crossed to the stool beside him.

She climbed up, bumping his arm with all the grace of a klutz. She felt so _tired_. She felt Dennis turn in his seat, hand steadying her arm, sending her a glance that held something wry lurking somewhere inside.

Casey could only imagine what she must look like right now, uncombed hair and faced smushed with the lines of the couch.

"Shut up," Casey mumbled at him, head ducking at the way his eyes sparked with the start of a amusement.

Jade looked over the door of the fridge. "What'd you say, Casey?"

"Oh, um, sure a parfait sounds great. Thank you."

She was aware Jade was being overly attentive, still caught in the mode of taking care of her. But Casey didn't feel like fighting it. It could get annoying, unnecessary, but right now it almost felt nice. Like she was part of a group of people who cared.

She sipped on her coffee and couldn't resist glancing over at Dennis's paper, curious what he was looking at. She almost choked on her coffee.

"Are, are you reading the comics?"

He glanced down at her over his shoulder. "Yes. Why?"

"Well, I just," Casey fumbled, "thought you'd be reading something more... boring."

Jade let out a snort of laughter, unable to believe Casey had just said that but Dennis never looked at the woman.

"They're easier to read." Dennis didn't speak loud enough for anyone to overhear, had moved to speak more directly to her. Casey had her feet tucked up on her stool, was leaning against the counter, towards him. She was too tired to notice if she was invading his space. It felt too right for Dennis to notice.

Jade noticed, and when she set the bowl down in front of Casey, neither of them straightened back.

She didn't understand it. Dennis should have straightened, Dennis _would_ have straightened. The fact that he hadn't meant he hadn't even realized how closely they were sitting just now, how completely his body had turned towards Casey's.

Something had changed. Something in Dennis seemed to understand what Casey needed and Jade couldn't bring herself to get in the way. She had never seen Dennis this soft before, this willingly relaxed. Like he had forgotten how to be a wall and turned into a shelter. Jade knew now was not the time to worry, to bring up concern over where Casey found her support. She needed it right now.

But Casey was young, she was _very_ young and she would cling to the first strength she could find. Dennis would never seem anything other than strong.

Jade just hoped this didn't go somewhere it really shouldn't.

* * *

"Keep em closed."

Casey stood obediently still in the hall, hands over her eyes, waiting for Barry to be ready to show her whatever it was he was about to reveal. He was excited, had been bouncing with it since he came down the hall and pulled Casey into the living room, telling Jade to come too. Now they had to shut their eyes and wait for him to be ready for them.

She felt the air of the hall around her, empty, suddenly feeling like it stretched far wider than it did. She didn't like the blank space beside her. She knew Jade was somewhere near her, eyes closed in the same ridiculous way, but Casey couldn't feel her, didn't know where she was.

She was just standing in a stupid hall but she felt the unease creep in, wanted too badly to open her eyes.

"Excuse me." The voice came from over her shoulder and Casey started, felt a hand on her elbow as Dennis moved around her. He had tried to come down the hall and she and Jade were in the way. His shadow blocked out the light touching Casey's eyes.

"Casey. What are you doing?"

The complete confusion made her open her eyes. His fingers still held lightly below her elbow, his body blocked all view of the livingroom where Barry still worked.

"Well, we were," she glanced next to her but Jade wasn't there, she had given up waiting and just walked away, leaving Casey standing alone in the hall.

Dennis watched Casey grow flustered, embarrassment in her cheeks as she stammered out an explanation about Barry and waiting for something and how Jade was supposed to be here too. He felt her fingers play across the sleeve of the arm that had steadied her, hand unconsciously gripping his forearm, saw the way she fit in his shadow like she was meant to be there. He wanted to keep her there in a way that didn't ache, that didn't doubt the intent of his fingertips. It felt light.

"Alright! I'm ready!" Barry popped into the hall, caught Casey's open gaze. "You're peeking!" His hand went to his hip in ruffled indignation as Jade stepped out from Barry's room where she had been killing time.

"Oh relax," she rolled her eyes at her brother as she passed, "You know Casey can't see a thing past Dennis."

It was true, Dennis blocked all of Casey's view but when her gaze met his it flashed like the words had meant something else. Like there was too much truth in that innocent statement. Casey couldn't see past Dennis because he was the first place she looked.

Barry led them into the living room, spun to dramatically display the little line of figures that had taken over the coffee table. He had finished his project. Mannequins that looked nothing like the scraps of plastic that had begun as all stood in elaborate poses, fabric hanging and clinging to each recycled frame. They were stunning. Some were bold and bright, others sleek, sophisticated. She wanted a closer look but was afraid to touch any of them. Could never in a thousand years imagine herself wearing a single one of them but could picture every tiny outfit life sized and on a run way. She didn't know what to say.

"Barry, these are amazing." It sounded inane, but Barry beamed. Jade had bent closer to inspect them, lifted one in a sleek black dress and held it up to Barry's nose.

"I'll take this in red."

Barry snatched it back, lips scowling but eyes pleased. Casey sent a look at Dennis, idly standing in the background, looking at the little modeling show with a look of resigned confusion. Barry followed her gaze and caught Dennis's eye.

Dennis sighed, arms unfolding as his hands found his pockets. "You did good, Barry." He allowed, and Barry bowed dramatically to his brother.

"High praise coming from you. Now." he straightened and set the one Jade had taken back down with the rest, "I'm turning it in tomorrow and I'm incredibly nervous," he dropped an arm around Casey's shoulder, tugging her to his side as Jade circled the coffee table, strangely quiet as she inspected each one. "Highest grade gets submitted into an opportunity for an exchange program, and I'm dying to go."

"I'm sure you'll do great, Barry." Casey cocked her head to peer up at him and he tweaked her nose, making her blink.

"Maybe, there's some tough competition," he grinned impishly, "and a couple of morons." He released Casey, shooing her and Jade away as he went to pack up his project, swearing his models needed their beauty sleep.

Jade rolled her eyes but when she passed her brother she reached out and ruffled his hair. It was both completely out of place and yet so entirely natural and Casey watched Barry laugh and duck his head away from her hand, saw the pride in Jade's eye at what her little brother had made. They were a family, taken from a broken one and pieced together into something whole.

Casey had held onto this shred of loyalty to her uncle because he was her only family she had left. But what if family wasn't just something you were born with. What if it built itself around you at the most unlikely times. She looked at Barry and Jade, at the sealed bond of love there. They had learned to be family, cared for eachother more than she ever had for her uncle.

She wanted to be a part of it. To be another broken piece added to their puzzle. But then her eyes were drawn to the stoic figure still standing beside. Too rigid to fit, too intense to be malleable. She remembered what he had said. Jade was Barry's sister, not his. He didn't belong with them. They shared Barry, the brother that could love them both. But Dennis didn't build family, he clung to the one life had given him.

She wondered if maybe Dennis didn't have enough energy, enough of himself to give to more than one person. He scripted everything he did around Barry's security. Maybe Jade was only Barry's sister because Dennis didn't want her. Maybe Dennis didn't want anyone beside Barry in his life.

"Casey."

Maybe there wasn't room for her here. Maybe she didn't fit with Dennis unless she was pressed against him.

"Yo, Case."

Maybe the only way Casey would ever be held was if it was wrong.

"Casey!" Jade snapped her fingers in front of Casey's face, worried by the look in the girl's eye. watched her blink back into herself. She'd been trying to get her attention and Casey's complete lack of response had freaked her out a little. "You allright?"

"Uh, yeah, of course," Casey's fingers tucked her long hair behind her ear, her eyes flickered to Jade then away, lips moving upward enough to be a smile. She looked pale, and Jade found herself looking at Casey, really looking.

She had seen her laugh and seen her quiet and seen her fear the night Dennis had frightened her. Seen her reserved intelligence behind sculpted brown eyes that didn't need a lick of mascara. She had acknowledged Casey was pretty in an unconventional way and been tickled pink whenever Barry tried to get her into any type of fashion. She had seen enough of the quiet girl that Casey presented to know that what she was seeing now was something Casey always kept locked deep inside. Casey had the look of someone who knew what it was like to hate at a distance. She kept the ugly parts hidden beneath enough drab layers that disgust atleast felt dull on her skin.

There was a darkness she had swallowed and for a moment it had swam behind her eyes.

She blinked it clear now, smoothed it away and faced Jade with a calm exterior and too controlled eyes. She apologized for spacing out and said she was just tired. Excused herself to her room and Jade found herself looking for her brother.

He was with Dennis in the kitchen and Jade stepped close so her voice was low.

"Barry," she began hesitantly, "I know, from what the officer said, that Casey's uncle hurt her. But what did he _do_ to her."

Barry looked shocked by the question, shifted away in uncomfortable surprise, sent Dennis a less than conspicuous glance.

"I don't know what, exactly, she didn't tell me."

It was Dennis who had heard the hard facts, Dennis who Jade faced now with a question in her eyes.

Something hard came over Dennis, something that left black ice in his eyes. "You know better than to ask."

These were Casey's secrets and Casey's facts and he had heard them in a moment she couldn't bear to be alone. She gave them to Dennis because he was the unbreakable choice and he wouldn't give them away with out her permission.

He knew Jade meant well, wanted to understand so she could better help Casey but he knew part of Casey didn't want to be understood. Because sometimes the suspicion in someone's eye was easier to bear than the horrified truth.

Atleast one had denial.

He walked away before Jade could answer, before the shame in her eye could come out as an apology. He pushed the door to his room open and stepped by Jade's open suitcase, ignored the mess on his bed. The objects in the drawer slid as he opened it too roughly, he selected what he needed and coldly left the room.

Casey's door was closed but he knocked lightly. Silence, then a hesitant footstep.

"Yeah?" Casey called through the door, trying not to let the reluctance show in her voice. They were just being kind, checking on her.

There wasn't an immediate answer and her gaze came up, fixing on the door, waiting for the voice she hadn't been expecting.

"I can go."

"No," Casey pulsed to the door and swung it open, peered up at Dennis with too poorly hidden relief. "That's okay. What's up?"

His eyes didn't dart over her face, didn't track the worn lines of suppressed tears, of anger. Didn't peer at her like she was something sick that need to be pitied. He looked at her like she was Casey. Nothing else.

He lifted the book he held, gave her a frank look. "Would you mind studying with me?"

Casey stared at the book and weak tears welled. She blinked them back and stepped aside, letting Dennis in. He didn't comment, didn't linger by her side. He crossed to her ruffled sleeping bag and straightened it before sitting down, feet settled on the floor at its edge. He slipped his glasses on without looking at her, opened the book and simply waited.

Casey crossed in a wave of deja vu, sat down beside him in a scene that felt too surreal, too unbelievable because it used to be so normal. She looked over his arm at what page he was on, caught a breath of the scent of Dennis's soap. She settled far closer than she should have. Than she needed to. Than the sensible part of her _wanted_ to but this didn't feel like crossing lines. This didn't feel like tempting darkness.

It felt like her only chance at light.

Dennis felt the brush of her against his side and felt his tense anger ebb. Watched her fingers move to straighten the page and felt his chest relax. He felt Casey fit in innocence beside him and felt his heart grow warm.


	23. Fraction

"Mith Catheeeey!"

Casey heard it coming down the hall before her door banged open. Dennis lowered the book to his lap with a soft groan as Hedwig bounded into the room.

"Barry th'aid you were here!"

She barely had time to react before Hedwig was skipping forward, scrambling across her sleeping bag to take the place right between her and Dennis. He held a toy dinosaur in his hand that he accidentally bumped against Dennis's leg. His apology quickly grew distracted when he saw the glasses Dennis wore.

"Heyyyyy. You got gla'thes?!"

Casey watched Dennis shift uncomfortably, hand raising to remove his glasses self consciously, sending the boy a frank look,

"They help me to read, Hedwig."

Hedwig was staring, mute with shock and Casey could feel Dennis growing embarrassed. He focused on the book he was closing, removed his glasses, intent on setting it and his glasses away from the boy who had a tendency to break things.

"They're just like yours, Hedwig," Casey smiled as she ruffled the boys hair, breaking his moment of awe.

"That's th'o cool!" Hedwig bounced on his knees, eyes lighting with absolute delight and Casey watched a curious expression cross Dennis's face. Like he hadn't been expecting Hedwig's excitement. Like he had been expecting the boy to laugh.

It touched her, in an ironic way, how Hedwig looked up to Dennis in so many ways but the man was worried what the boy would think of his glasses.

Dennis was self conscious. He never wore the glasses in front of Barry or Jade. Letting Hedwig see them had been an accident. But he never seemed to mind wearing them when she studied with him. Maybe he just didn't care what Casey thought. But she hoped, that maybe, Dennis understood that Casey would never laugh at him.

Casey felt Hedwig snuggle back closer against her side as he kicked his feet against her sleeping bag. She dropped her hand from ruffling the boys hair and felt her fingers connect with Dennis's arm. They flexed partially around his bicep, pulling the slightly rough fabric of his shirt taut. She didn't know why she was doing it, why her thumb trailed over the curve of his arm. Hedwig was chatting and her gaze was on the boy like it was nothing more than an absent touch. But there was nothing absent in Casey's mind.

She had traced his arm like this before, when his hands and pinned her waist and her fingers had latched onto his arms.

Her fingers dropped and Casey drew back, frightened by the memory, how easy it was to fall back into thoughts she should be ashamed of. Thoughts she shouldn't have.

She wondered if Dennis was affected, if he remembered it the way she did but she didn't know. She couldn't tell. Her hand had reached for him and he had not even reacted.

Since when did she just touch him like that?

Realizations layered in and Casey considered her actions of the last days. He had held her and he had let her touch with more familiarity than Casey could have ever expected and she had hardly noticed. There had been no tortured heat, no edge of dark regret.

She had spent the night in his arms.

And felt nothing but calm.

Heat filled her at the memory, disbelief that she had let that happened, that she had wrapped herself in a touch she swore she would never use again. That she had fallen right back into what had gotten her kicked out in the first place and hadn't even _noticed_.

None of this made sense. Dennis had begun as cold, became brief violence that turned to stone that wouldn't soften but would warm. Warm until it became a heat she couldn't bear before it had fractured into something dark behind betrayed eyes. She had walked away thinking in the back of her mind that she would never see him again.

But now he was here, sitting closer than she would ever thought before like the only thing that had shifted was the distance between them. But Casey knew that wasn't true. Everything had changed. The pieces inside her had been rearranged. Before they had been broken but were manageable, held in a pattern she could contain but would never quite fit together. Held in a way that wouldn't heal but atleast couldn't fall apart.

Or so she had thought.

They had fallen. Were shaken free the day her feet had taken her from this home she had found. Had scattered on the pavement the moment her uncle had stepped into view. The finally not-so-broken Casey had been reduced to fearful tears and silent hatred for a part of her no one should ever get to see.

But Dennis had held that brokenness in a way that felt like the pieces were getting put back to where they belonged, to how they had been so long before when together they made up a girl Casey couldn't even recognize anymore. Dennis had become something Casey didn't recognize but part of her knew she needed. It was more than strength and it was more than comfort. It was more than what he could give and what Casey wanted to take.

It was more than seeking a distracted touch. He was comfort that didn't hover unnecessarily like an incessant breath on her shoulder. He brought light without banishing the darkness that Casey didn't fully want gone because it had always been a part of her. He was a shadow when Casey held too much light that she felt she might explode.

She teetered between a chaos of thoughts and emotions. He was balance between hope and disgusted reality, an even plane that leveled Casey out and just let her breathe. She didn't understand what was happening but she knew with a frightfully clear thought that despite Barry's and Jade's almost desperate attempts, Dennis was helping her in a way they never could.

And he wasn't even trying.

Hedwig still talked, dinosaur moving animatedly in his hands as he told Casey all about it. She would feel guilty later for not listening. Her eyes now were on the man beside her, sitting rigidly in his straight grey button up next to her on her floor. His gaze had been on his book, closed but holding his focus, but now it moved. As if he sensed the breath of her glance, Dennis looked at Casey.

Frank emptiness shown in his eye, the kind that comes after a shrug of giving up, of not knowing what to do. He didn't have answers or support or anything Casey could pretend she needed to make the others feel better because they could offer it, and she didn't care.

In that moment, for whatever reason, from whatever cause, Dennis was just a little bit lost. Not enough to be frightened, just enough to leave space in his gaze for it to linger, to trail over her expression. He wasn't focused with his usual control. This wasn't a look of intent. It was a look of quiet question, a _how did I get here, on your floor, Casey, I don't do this_. It was a _why aren't you asking me to leave?_

A call in the hallway, Barry was looking for Hedwig. Dennis's gaze focused on the door. Casey watched it settle back in, to his jaw, his posture, that edge of reason. His fingers lifted his book and Dennis straightened, leaving the floor without stepping on her sleeping bag. He cleared his throat before looking at her, direct, body turned to face her before he spoke.

"Thank you for you help, Casey."

His eyes didn't catch the way her lips moved through silent response, uncertain of what to say. The way Hedwig wriggled forward like he wanted to go after him. The way Casey gently tugged him back.

Dennis couldn't look right now.

Because he didn't want to consider the _whys_ and the _hows_ and the _what was he doings_. The _should he be doing its_. He liked this careful place where Casey was safe and he could relax. He was in the aftermath of regret and the discovery of terrible truth, the oddly still time that mirrored peace. Answers were far from being found and if his thoughts grew too still they would find those haunting words of what Casey had faced at the hands of her uncle. If he stayed too contained they over ran him. The sight of Casey should be a reminder, the sound of her voice an echo in memory but somehow her presence stilled the jagged whispers.

Seeing her let him know she was okay. In many ways Dennis knew Casey was not the fragile victim Barry feared she was. Because it had been too long. It was almost as if victim had an expiration date. Casey had learned to live with it all. It had been pulled out and twisted to the surface with everything that had happened. But Casey had developed scar tissue. It wouldn't hurt so bad this time around.

He couldn't think much deeper than that. Consider the reasons why Casey had learned to be so strong. He couldn't let those thoughts in because they would turn him into something that would frighten the others.

He had to see Casey was okay, because if he didn't he was afraid he would become something the others would never want to see.

* * *

Casey spent her day with Hedwig. She thought for sure the boy would grow bored out of his mind because she really didn't do much, but Hedwig chattered enough for the both of them. Apparently Barry had explained to Hedwig that Casey had left and he was very excited when he had found out it wasn't true. Hedwig said Barry was silly for lying. Casey said Hedwig was right. The boy played, never knowing what had brought Casey back. Or why she had left in the first place.

When Jade left to take Hedwig home after dinner, Casey was sorry to see the boy go. She liked playing with him, talking to him. But secretly part of her was relieved. His energy could be taxing when all she wanted was quiet, but the silence left her with her own thoughts and that wasn't something she wanted to happen. She wanted a distraction that wasn't loud and when Barry put a movie on, Casey happily joined him on the couch. She zoned out as the characters played across the screen, barely paying a attention until Barry nudged her arm.

"You aren't falling asleep again, are you?"

Her head turned to catch the suspicious accusation in his eye and Casey shook her head,

"No. Course not."

Barry held out his arms, a crooked smile putting a gleam in his eye, "You might as well. I've got to be more comfortable than Dennis."

His brow waggled as Casey coughed, fighting a blush, ears burning as Barry laughed. She hadn't realized they knew. Had Dennis _told_ Barry she had spent the night on the couch?

"You didn't really think I'd let you live that down, did you?"

And she realized Barry meant the last time they had all watched a movie, when Casey had dropped off against Dennis's arm. When she had wakened to shadows because Dennis hadn't wanted to move and wake her.

Barry snickered, plopping a pillow against Casey's side, he turned and reclined against it, tilting his head back to look up at Casey.

"You blush so easy sometimes, doll." His thumb flicked over her cheek, "Course I'd be embarrassed too if I fell asleep on that lunk," he shuddered as if in horror but Casey didn't laugh. She frowned down at him laying so casually against her. He didn't ask. He didn't consider. He just _invaded_.

"Don't be mean, Barry."

It came out bitter, and Casey knew Barry didn't really deserve it, but she didn't like how casually he called Dennis names. How he acted like being near Dennis would be revolting. It was mean. Dennis didn't deserve mean.

Barry sat up in surprise, turning to face her with wide emotion in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Case. I didn't mean anything by it."

"I know," Casey could feel the frown still in place, didn't like the little ball of anger that was off balance inside of her, unsettled. "But he's done a lot, Barry. Dennis has. For you, you know," she trailed off, feeling foolish in the wake of unexpected anger. "You should be nicer." She finished it quieter, eyes looking past him, chin tucked so her hair fell to hide her face.

She felt suddenly exposed and she didn't know why.

Barry scoffed. It was a harsh sound and Casey's eyes flashed to him, anger rekindling. He shouldn't think it was funny. But the look on Barry's face wasn't amused. It was incredulous. His hand lifted to cup her face, a move that drew Casey into something rigid. It was simple and harmless but her skin felt cold. It wasn't fair to be reacting to Barry this way but Casey couldn't help it.

Barry shook his head a little, smiling almost sadly. She was defending Dennis. The man who had threatened her, treated her coldly, kicked her out and put her in danger. Barry understood now why Dennis had done it, but he hadn't expected Casey to understand. She thought he needed to be nicer to his brother.

Maybe she was right.

"You have a good heart, babygirl."

Brown eyes blinked but were fixed too tensely, her breath a fraction too fast. Barry drew back, realizing, worried and a little hurt. He hadn't seen Casey like this in a while, so tense at a touch. He had forgotten she used to get like this. He hadn't meant to make her uncomfortable, could kick himself for not considering, for feeling upset that she would be uncomfortable with him. Casey needed space, that was fine. He could give it.

He would do anything she needed and wished at times it wasn't so hard to figure out.

When he drew away he got the feeling it was a little to intentional, a little too obvious, because Casey flushed with a look of guilt that Barry couldn't wipe away no matter how much he wanted to. He did what he could and it drove him just a little crazy knowing that there were ways he couldn't help Casey. Somethings she needed to be on her own.

Barry wasn't always very good at remembering that.

* * *

Jade came home and interrupted the end of the movie. Barry didn't really seem to mind, had seemed a little distracted since Casey had scolded him. He went to bed early, bidding everyone a general goodnite. Jade surprised them by heading to bed soon after, apparently she had something to do the next morning.

It was barely after nine when Dennis left his room so Jade could claim it. Lights still blazed and he switched them off as he moved down the hall. Barry usually left the apartment like that when going to bed was a snap decision.

He passed by a darkened kitchen, paused when he noticed the light above the sink was still on. Well atleast Barry had sort of tried to turn those lights off. He entered the kitchen and saw Casey, quiet in the shadows, back against the counter and arms folded over her stomach.

She didn't look tense, or nervous, more like she stood in this quiet because she wanted it. It was an unexpected place to find solace, surrounded by clean lines and cool surfaces, but he understood. Casey wasn't in here for comfort. She was in here for calm, and if you convinced yourself enough it could feel like the same thing.

He didn't intend to disturb her, but she turned when he went to move away, caught sight of him and offered an absent smile, a soft look that seemed a little bit tired. He was entering the kitchen without much thought.

"I can't believe it's only nine. It feels so much later than that."

Her arms moved, holding herself tighter as if she were cold. Dennis settled against the counter beside her, letting his arms fold over his chest, eyes on the blank wall across from them. Jade had suggested once that they decorate their kitchen. Barry and Dennis had both just looked at her like she was insane.

Dennis liked the clear walls and plain white tile. It was clean, neat, easy to keep that way.

He heard Casey sigh. "I think I upset Barry."

Dennis looked down at her in question, not considering before that she could be the reason Barry had been distracted. Her eyes were fixed on the floor, arms had unfolded so her fingers could twirl around themselves. She looked small, worry replacing the calm.

Her hands dropped to her sides before she peeked up at him, eyes full of rueful honesty. "We were watching a movie and I stiffened when he tried to sit with me. I think he noticed because he moved away." Her eyes fell away again. "Sometimes I don't like to be touched."

Dennis frowned and his body settled just a fraction further away from her, adding unintentional space to the distance already between. An instinctive reaction and Casey felt it tug at her. She hadn't wanted that. Hadn't wanted to say anything because she didn't want to be that sensitive person that others needed to watch themselves around.

Sometimes talking made it worse.

"Barry would never want you to be uncomfortable, Casey." Dennis stated simply, but there was a confidence there that was certain of his brother's intentions. Barry cared and would feel terrible if he thought he had hurt Casey in any way.

"Neither would I." A quieter admittance. A heavier one. The space between them felt way too intentional now. Like carefully measured distance that must never be crossed. She felt the air like it was a solid barrier.

"Barry doesn't make me uncomfortable," Casey was shaking her head, knowing she was contradicting herself, but not sure how to explain. "I like him, and I trust him, I just..." she sighed, frustrated.

"Sometimes you don't like to be touched." Dennis said it like it was the simplest explanation in the world, and she grew quiet.

"Yeah," she barely mumbled, back returned to the counters edge, eyes found the wall across from her.

Silence passed for a moment, comfortable.

Casey suddenly turned to him. "Why does Jade sleep in your room?"

She saw Dennis's brow raise in the shadows, shoulder lift in a shrug and he settled at an angle to half face her.

"I mean," Casey continued stepping away from the counter, "She's _Barry's_ sister. Why doesn't she sleep in Barry's room, put him on the couch."

Dennis's lips moved. "Have you seen Barry's room?"

"No," Casey said, half surprised by the realization, "I haven't."

"Barry likes to... collect things. Jade found it difficult to sleep in such a 'chaotic environment,"

Casey laughed a little, imaging Jade telling Barry all about it. "Still, she could take the couch. Why do you?"

Dennis shrugged, frowning as if he had never really thought about it, "She's a guest. She should be comfortable."

At Casey's look, his lip half curled in amused defeat, "And she makes a mess when she sleeps in the livingroom. She's... more careful when she's in my room."

Casey sent him an _I knew it_ look, returning to her place at the counter. She had claimed some of the space between them. Still not touching but she was closer, leaving only a fraction of empty air.

Dennis didn't know how to respond. She wanted space but claimed his, drew back from Barry but brushed against him with more than accidental touch. He didn't draw back and heard her quiet sigh as if relaxed.

Shared quiet passed between them.

Casey suddenly spoke again. "Have you every thought of decorating in here?"

Dennis's short scoff of laughter echoed on the bare walls.


	24. Away

"Oh, don't be ridiculous." Jade's voice had gone high and Casey entered the leaving room more than a little confused. Barry was staring at his sister with a gigantic grin on his smug face.

"I  _knew_  that's where you were going so early, Jade. Admit it."

"I went for a run, like I told you 15 times already." Jade rolled her eyes, hands on her hips. Black work out leggings and long sleeved top making her look fierce. Casey had always known Jade was well built but she had never realized how toned the girl was. It was a little bit daunting.

"But did you go  _aloone,"_ Barry cooed the word and Jade blushed. Casey's choked laughter left her before she could stop it.

Jade had been gone before any of them had gotten up, except Dennis and he hadn't asked her where she was going, no that that stopped Barry from asking him incessantly if he knew anything. Barry had been running through theories all morning, and had settled in the  _only thing_ that would get Jade out of bed that early was a man.

Casey hadn't thought for a moment he was actually right. But Jade's eyes had brightened with something other than her usual sass and Casey saw the victory in Barry's eyes.

"Oh heck no, I don't think so," Jade marched her brother down, "You can back off and mind your own business, because who I ran with, is  _none_ of yours."

Casey could see it in his eyes that there was no chance Barry was going to do any of that.

She ducked into the kitchen as Dennis looked up from his computer at the sound of rising voices from the living room. Casey crossed for a drink, distracted when Dennis slid something across the counter for her. It was a slip of paper, a receipt with a name and number written in bold scrawl across the back. Casey read the name "Luke" in confusion.

"You might want to give this back to Jade." Casey looked at him, and he met her gaze without an ounce of reaction. "She left it on the counter this morning."

Casey gaped at him, "You knew who Jade was meeting?"

He nodded once.

"But Barry asked you like a million times." She was surprised Dennis hadn't told Barry just to get him to be quiet.

Dennis shrugged, "It's not his business."

Casey took the paper obediently and folded it into her pocket, "I think you just like messing with Barry," she muttered

" _oh come on! just tell me"_ Barry's voice rose louder and Dennis's gaze never left hers, but his lips moved in a fraction of a smirk and Casey felt her stomach warm. It was dark, a vein of smug humor buried so deep that it flashed in his eye like something dangerous.

It was a piece of that underlying edge to Dennis. Like the coiled kind of heat thar Casey wanted to explode.

Jade sauntered into the kitchen as Barry gave up and tromped down the hall, distracting Casey from her thoughts.

"He's so easy to rile up," she laughed a little too gleefully, with a giddy edge she was trying to hide and Casey pulled the receipt from her pocket, then on second thought, she stuffed it back in.

"You and Luke must have really hit it off," she commented idly, watching Jade sputter on the spot.

Her eyes met Dennis's before she left the room, wanting to see it, feel it breaking through.

The light must have been in her eyes. For a moment she must have begun to hallucinate. Because when his eyes met hers, Casey  _swore_  that Dennis winked.

* * *

 

Another day to be spent in the apartment, and Casey found herself digging through her boxes. There was no pont, taking everything out, just to put them all back in at the end of the week.

It was a waste of time. But atleast it would give her something to do.

She took her time, but honestly didn't consider much where she put things. It was just for show. Something to fill up the space.

A knock on the door and it swung, already half open. Dennis stood in the hall. His eyes took in the room and Casey floundered.

"I'm not unpacking. I mean. I know I'm not staying. I was just... bored."

His eyes darkened, lips moved as if to speak. Then he cleared his throat, head shaking slightly. "Do you need anything from the store? I was going out."

"Oh," Casey completely blanked on anything, "No, but thank you."

He walked away and Casey remembered everything she was out of.

* * *

 

Barry left for class in his usual flurry of movement, Casey was standing in the wake of it when her phone rang. The cafe's number flashed across her screen. She had never saved the contact, still too used to hiding where she worked, that she even worked. But she recognized the number.

She had missed another shift. Ashlyn was leaving voicemails. Casey was finding herself grateful she had been outside when her uncle had found her, the girls in the cafe had missed the show.

So when she had disappeared from work, Ashlyn had been concerned, asking where she was. If she was alright. Casey felt guilty for not calling her back. Not showing up for work.

But her uncle knew where the cafe was. She couldn't go back there. Even after, when she was 18 and legally free of him, she didn't want to work somewhere he would know about.

Didn't want him coming in. Playing nice with the other employees. He could be charming when he wanted to be. She could just imagine him, talking with Ashlyn. Flirting. Asking how his caseybear had been doing at work.

Her stomach rolled and Casey sent the call to voicemail. She plopped onto the couch as the phone dinged. Ashlyn had left a message. She was so tempted to just not listen to it.

But she wanted to know what was going on. If her uncle really had gone back there. If he was still looking. What they had told them.

She clicked ont he notification and Ashlyn's voice came through the phone.

_omg Kay, the_ Police  _were just here. What have you gotten yourself into girl? Well I guess this means you aren't actually coming back. I'll stop calling but you might want to pick up your check or whatever. Oh, there's a customer, gotta go._

The line clicked off and Casey lowered her phone, eyes fixed on the windows across from her, clear and simple. So her uncle had told the police where she worked. She should have expected that. Part of her was hoping her was going to try and find her on his own, but officers were involved now. They were still looking for her.

She wondered if it had been that Detective, David Dunn that had gone there. Had that been weird for him, asking questions when he  _knew_ where she was? Maybe he was having second thoughts, feeling guilty about hiding this.

With a frustrated huff Casey dropped her phone onto the cushion beside her with too much force. It bounced, and landed with a plop on the floor.

She stared at it, felling betrayed, too lazy to pick it up. "Fine. Stay there for all I care."

There came the sound of someone clearing their throat behind her, and Dennis spoke. "Is everything alright?"

Casey groaned, head falling into her hands. Of course he had to see that.

"Yeah," she spoke through her fingers, voice muffled by the long sleeves of her sweat shirt. She heard movement as Dennis passed by the couch and bent to retrieve her phone. "It was just work."

She looked up to see Dennis standing over her, holding her phone out to her. She took it, offering him a tired smile as he settled next to her. He was wearing his grey sweats, not having gotten dressed for the day in his slacks and button up. She wondered at it, then she remembered it was Dennis's usual day off. Even if he hadn't gotten fired, he would have been home today and worn something similar.

It was almost funny, in an endearing way, how he still kept to his schedules, still had his life stacked in blocks. She wondered suddenly if he felt lost at all, not working, stuck home with her while the others had places to go, things to do. She had cost him some of his structure, but he didn't seem shaken. Dennis was constant no matter what.

"Do you miss your job?" She didn't know why she asked it, but one of his shoulders lifted in a shrug as he folded his arms, head turning to look at her beside him. He wasn't far. There was adequate space to say there was distance, but he felt closer. Nearer. Like the gap between them was shrinking.

"No." He answered simply, then frowned slightly. 'I suppose I miss working. but not there."

Casey didn't say anything, choosing instead to draw her knees up, laying her cheek against them as she looked at him. She was in her baggiest sweats, the big, almost tattered kind that covered every inch, every suggestion that there was a person under neath. Dimly she wondered if she should be embarrassed. Barry would have a fit if he saw her in these. Dennis didn't seem to notice.

But why on earth would Dennis even care what she looked like.

"Do you? Miss your job?" His question surprised her and Casey puffed out her cheeks as she sighed.

"I guess, maybe. I didn't like leaving how I did. Without telling them."

"You did what was best, Casey."

She smiled a little at the simple encouragement, face turned forward to blink at the blank tv. Dennis moved in his seat, trying to think of something to say.

"They were very focused on the customers there." Dennis began, and her head turned a little to catch his words, "the other employees there, they paid alot of attention to people as they came in. They must like their jobs."

Casey snorted, "Yeah okay," she looked at him with an ironic smile, "they don't pay attention to customers, Dennis. They paid attention to  _you."_

It was a fascinating puzzle to watch his expression. Eyes blinking with apparent confusion, blank face refusing to show that he was unsure. He had no idea what she was talking.

"You know, because you're" she waved a hand over him, the lines of his arm under his shirt, the way his body held with easy strength. A frown creased his brow.

"Did I bother you, Casey, coming to your work?" The look in his eye told her he asked because he really didn't know. Casey let her knees fall as she sat up, turning to face him in quiet surprise.

"What, no of course not Dennis. Why would you?"

He blinked twice and looked a way, arms unfolding his gaze dropped to the hands he clasped together, thumbs moving against each other. But embarrassment couldn't break Dennis's direct focus and his eyes turned to her before he spoke.

"People can be embarrassed to be seen with me. I make others uncomfortable."

Casey didn't really mean to laugh. She didn't think it was funny, just completely ludicrous. "I'd never be embarrassed by you, Dennis. If anything I'd feel bad about them seeing you with  _me._ You're so," the only word that came to mind was 'impressive' and she felt heat touch her cheeks at the thought. Her gaze dropped like a stone as sudden uncertainty filled her. She had gotten herself into this sentence and now she didn't know how to get her self out.

"... big," she finally mumbled, "I look pretty insignificant next to you."

She tried to lighten it with a smile, like she was joking around and hadn't meant to turn this conversation into this. He had a way of making her say things she hadn't intended, pulled out admittance that she meant to stay put.

But Dennis didn't smile. When he leaned forward it was to level her gaze with a look she felt past her toes. It trapped her in place with a dark kind of energy that held a sincerity so intense it was almost unsteady.

"You're not insignificant, Casey."

Ther was nothing to do but breath in the narrowed space between, to feel the heat of his gaze and his words and not even try to fumble through a response. He frowned in a way that sharpened the feeling in Casey's stomach, that left her no choice but to believe Dennis's words.

He shifted back, eyes, clearing, shoulders relaxing in a way that looked intentional, like Dennis had reminded himself not to be so close. But he didn't get up, he didn't walk away. And when Casey handed him the tv remote, he took it without a word, clicking the tv on to fill up the silence.

* * *

 

Jade reappeared shortly before Barry. The night was spent around pizza and boardgames that should have been simple but Jade and Barry played by rules Casey had never heard before. Apparently a lot of their board games growing up had been missing the instructions. True to Barry's and Jade style, they had created a whole layer of rules that only made sense in their heads. Casey played because it was fun and she didn't have to think of much else. Dennis used the distraction to find quiet in his room.

Jade had never really stayed this long before. A couple of nights here and there never left him feeling very displaced, but now he found himself missing being able to close his door at night, shut out the echoes of the apartment. Sometimes the living room felt too big at night.

He wasn't sleeping well. He didn't want to dwell on why. His usual schedule had been interrupted and he chose to believe once he regained some structure that his nights would fall back into normal. But he knew that wasn't true.

It wasn't just his schedule that had been interrupted. His entire life had been turned upside down, and left hanging by threads of memories and haunting words. He was fine if he didn't think. To consider everything that had happened was to open too many doors in his mind and he did not want to face what was behind them.

Casey seemed to be doing well, returned to her usual self, calm face over secrets that didn't have to be locked inside anymore. Jade and Barry were trying to go back to normal, but it was still there, in the air around him, the knowledge that Casey had been hurt.

They couldn't escape it and neither could he. Like he couldn't escape her. What was he doing, sitting with her when he should keep his distance, choosing the place always beside. Letting her brush against him, the touch of her leaving something on his skin, like a faint pressure that for once didn't claw at his insides. It just lingered. It wasn't frantic or pressing but it was  _there._

He thought he was doing better, he wouldn't cross the lines he had crossed before, wouldn't let himself  _be_ wrong.

But he didn't know what wrong was anymore. Because Casey wasn't pulling at his body anymore. She was tugging at something far deeper and much more concerning. The body that had tempted his hands was a mere shadow to those eyes that were tempting his heart.

He couldn't fight against a pull so natural he could barely notice it. He didn't know how.

He didn't know if he wanted to.

and he really didn't know if he should.

Too loud laughter drifted down the hall, Jade and Barry going at it over who had won with Casey willingly caught in between. She enjoyed the life they brought with them, liked the way they made her smile. But when it got to be too much he wondered if she would take to the quiet hall, if her fingers would find his door.

If she would find what he found whenever Casey was around. That tenuous balance between peace and uncertain energy. The kind that made his heart beat too fast even as the rest of him relaxed.

He set his GED book down, unable to study with the sounds reaching his room. He stood, stepping by Jade's suitcase that he agreed not to mess with if she agreed to keep it neat.

It wasn't neat but he could tell she had tried. As he frowned at the mess his eyes caught a stain at the hem of his shirt and a sigh left him. It looked like coffee which meant it had been there for some time. The thought irritated him and he tugged the offending garment over his head, intent on washing the stain out.

His stain remover was not in his closet next to the washer where it belonged, and he remembered the text from Barry saying he had borrowed it. It was when he had still been ticked at Dennis for not telling him about his adoption, Barry wouldn't have gone into his room without permission otherwise. It had been an intentional move just to annoy Dennis and Dennis had intentionally not reacted.

To the point he had forgotten about it. Now he had to retrieve it, and he really hoped Barry had left it in the bathroom because no part of him wanted to step foot into Barry's mess of a room.

He crossed to the door, soiled shirt in hand, and swung it open before he ever heard the knock.

Casey stood in the hall. Eyes widened in surprise at how sharply the door had opened, landed on Dennis and widened further still. Bare chest and full arms were the center of her view, completely unexpected. He had stopped in place as if as surprised as she was, watching her eyes drift over him. watching them freeze on the center of his chest.

_"Dennis"_

Her feet brought her a step nearer, her hand lifted as her brow furrowed in shocked concern. He knew what she was seeing. Raised and ugly and stretched across his chest in an uneven pattern. Rough wounds from a rusty knife that had torn open the flesh it had ripped through. Repeated marks that left their dull history in his skin.

The pads of her fingers brushed against them.

Dennis's body jerked back, his hands closing around her wrist, a vice that wouldn't tighten but would not release. Her hand was trapped as he lowered it away from him. Her lips trembled as her eyes met his.

"Wha, how?" She heard the waver of her whisper and wished she had better words. He stared at her with dark eyes that held darker truth. Not speaking, not admitting, not  _letting her see_  but the way he held around her suddenly made sense. How he seemed to know, what she needed, what thoughts played out that she couldn't explain.

Dennis understood.

Some how, in some broken past he had felt pain that had taught him what it was to be hurt. What it was to barely heal.

"W _ho did this to you?"_

He saw her tear fall and his gaze snapped away from it, unable to witness what was in her eyes without coming undone. Throat worked as his jaw tightened, his hold released hers as Dennis stepped intentionally back.

"Excuse me, Casey."

Cold tone and he wouldn't look at her. Casey understood the walls that had come up. Walls she had before swore she would never press against. Walls she wanted nothing more than to bring down.

"I'm sorry, Dennis," her eyes traced a face that wouldn't turn to look at her. "I'll see you later, okay?"

She gave him what he wanted, and Casey walked away


	25. Brittle

_Dennis_

The voice played in his mind. The horror, the whisper in her eyes of realization. She understood somehow that each mark had been no accident.

_I'm sorry Dennis._

Somehow she knew enough to walk away.

No questions, no nails dug in to drag the story out of him. No selfish offense that Dennis might not want to tell her. He had fallen back, needing space and she had effortlessly given it to him.

Now that he had it he stood alone in the empty. Now that she was gone a part of him wished that she would turn back. But Dennis was never one to chase shadows, and he selected a new shirt with a calm and steady hand.

When Jade walked in later and found him taking apart a miniature model, she didn't comment. She grabbed her bag and headed to shower, letting him put it back together piece by tiny piece.

When she returned she was ready for bed. Dennis stepped into the hall and heard Barry still in the living room. He could go out, claim the couch, turn the lights out and set the house into dark.

Instead his hand found itself knocking on a plain grey door.

Casey swung it open, eyes instinctively softening at the sight of him. That look of someone who  _knows_. But it didn't drip with pity. These were eyes that both mourned but accepted. Eyes that knew evil existed but had not grown callous to it. Too many that saw darkness learned to be unfazed by a shadow.

But not Casey. Casey still cared.

"Dennis, hey, were you wanting to study?" she glanced down at his hands and found them empty, watched one raise to rake across his head.

"No." he answered, the word slightly longer than it should have been.

"Oh," her fingers were white as she lay them against the door she held open, pale and small, "Did you want to come in?"

Slowly Dennis nodded, letting himself decide, "I think... that I did."

He stepped into the room after her, stood in the center of it as Casey knelt beside her sleeping bag, returning items to a box beside. His eyes scanned the room, just as scarcely furnished as before. But this felt different. Before she had left she had set her room up in her own, easy way. Few objects, but they were placed about in a way that showed she thought about where she would place them. Now there were things scattered to fill up space. Like she was going for the illusion of settling in.

He remembered passing by her room, her blush at being caught unpacking. 'I _know I'm not staying.'_

It had seemed so obvious, she was here only until she could safely live elsewhere, the end of this week and she would be free to go wherever she chose.

But did she want to leave, to go somewhere far, that wasn't here?

Why  _couldn't_ she stay? She would be legal, free to make her own decision, living here without the pretext of lies. It wasn't the same here without her. The air itself seem to hold a different scent, no longer fresh because it was clear, it was clear because it was just... empty.

They couldn't go back. he understood that. Go back to before the lies, before they had touched darkness and crossed that line into eachother. It wasn't reasonable to think that they ever could return to that simple contentment. That life.

But part of him was stubbornly asking, why couldn't they?

"So, I guess Jade is down for the night,"

Her words interrupted his thoughts and his gaze found her there, kneeling on the sleeping bag, fingers turning together as she looked up at him.

"She is," Dennis nodded, watching her eyes warm with amusement, like there was an inside joke that he wasn't quite understanding.

"It's early for her. I wonder if she's going out early again."

"Oh," Dennis blinked a little, "perhaps." He pressed his hands into his pockets, his weight back onto his heels as if grounding himself. Casey's fingers still twirled. She grew antsy when she felt awkward. Dennis grew still.

"So-"

"Um-"

They spoke at once and Casey fumbled, cheeks heating. "Sorry."

"No," Dennis shook his head, "Continue, please."

He was standing there, just a solid expanse in the center of her room, making no move to get comfortable, to settle down somewhere. He was just  _standing,_ and Casey sat back on her hands and let herself look at him.

"I was just going to ask how studying has been going for you," her voice held a distracted edge and she watched his shoulder move, a slight shrug that was obvious compared to how still he stood. His gaze was frank as he looked at her.

"I didn't study much while you were gone."

His gaze wasn't embarrassed but his shoulders moved again, curving forward just a little bit, enough that he wasn't standing as tall. The barest touch of shame. Casey wanted to ask why, but decided against it, choosing to brush aside a question that would bring him unease.

"Have you thought about where you want to work next?"

Dennis frowned, so sharply it caught her off guard. She realized then she had not seen that lately. His expression had been heavy at times, worn and even resigned. But it was calm and controlled. This was just a flash of distaste.

"I can't find anything that would pay enough to stay here."

"Well what if I-" Casey stopped, stopped everything she was going to say.

' _help with the rent.'_

_'don't leave yet. '_

_'what if I... stayed.'_

That wasn't an option. She had betrayed them and put them both in unfair circumstances. Cost Dennis his job and put their home in jeopardy. She had done enough damage.

He didn't speak, didn't inquire what she was going to say. His gaze held hers and the conversation was stretched into the background.

His chest moved with each breath, stretched the white long sleeved shirt, expanding it in a way that drew her focus.

There were scars beneath that shirt, tracks of pain left in his skin. Her fingers still felt that brief touch, that raw moment when her touch had connected with the remnant of his pain.

His pain. That dark fire that held behind impassive eyes.

That lay like burnt steel behind cold gaze, brittle and black. That placed that sternness in his features and that distance to his air that caused everyone to hold just one more step away from him.

His pain that had drawn Casey out, drawn her to him, to the familiar empty regret in his eye. She hadn't realized, hadn't put that word with what she was seeing, but she understood now. Why Dennis fit in the fractured piece of her heart.

Because Dennis was broken too.

"Do they hurt?" her words were barely spoken but she saw that almost imperceptible stiffness that filled his posture. The wary way he blinked, hands raising to brush over the material pulled across his chest.

"No, Not anymore."

Something in his voice told Casey he was lying.

"I'm sorry, Dennis." she had already said it but she couldn't not say it again, couldn't look at him without feeling that ache, knowing the pain he had felt. Dimly she realized this must be a shadow of what Barry had felt, when he had learned about her, part of her understood his surge of need to help and comfort and that complete lack of knowing what to do.

But it didn't overtake Casey, it didn't pull her along and make her forget the boundaries in Dennis's eye.

He did not want to be overwhelmed. Not with sorrow. or even joy. He held even, would not rage with anger or fear.

But he could be pushed with heat. Could trap it in the steady touch of his fingertips, an energy that pulsed with strength.

His eyes were cold now.

"It happened a long time ago." Dismissive, but Casey just looked up at him quietly, not asking, not looking away. And Dennis sighed, a long, expansive sigh that drew his hands across his head in frustration, that then fisted them at his sides.

"I explained, before, what happened to Kevin." His voice was not kind, his words not soft or understanding, they were oppressive reason, hard fact as if a lecturer scolding an errant student and it tore Casey's heart to see the stern wall he built before pain.

"He fell on a rusty blade, and it grew infected. My mother," hands unfisted, closed tight again. White spread from each taut knuckle, "understood that I was responsible. The morning she gave Barry up, I woke to her standing over me..." a moment of unsteady tone, he cleared his throat, arms crossed, Casey sat in mute and vacant horror, "She said it was my chance to make it right. For the right son to be taken that time. She had kept it, the blade that had killed Kevin. I couldn't see Barry, when he left, I couldn't get up to say goodbye." Faster words that suddenly slowed.

"By I never got sick. It hurt, but I healed. She said I betrayed her, that if I was sorry I never would have survived." His gaze finally landed on her, and it stayed, unmoving, fixated on her face. On the streaks of tears that had begun, that fell and wouldn't stop.

"Casey." He sounded confused, disapproving, 'I didn't mean to upset you."

Casey stumbled upward on a sob, her body betraying her. She had meant to be calm but she couldn't bear it. He was tense when her body met his, rigid in the arms that wrapped around him. She clung to him in a need to stop pain that was only a memory, a part of a muddled past but she ached for him like it had happened yesterday. Her tears soaked his wounds as if they still bled. He held until slowly he relented, let his body give in the soft comfort, the warm support. His arms settled her closer and her chest moved in a sigh.

His chin met the crown of her head and he felt her shoulders curl closer. She was soft and small and forcing warmth almost painfully with each jolt of his heart. He felt his pulse in the wrist that brushed against her hair.

"That never should have happened to you, Dennis. You didn't deserve that, you could  _never_ deserve that.

She moved to peer up at him and the gloss of tears pulled out the waves of warm light in her eyes, danced off the reflection of fathomless depths. Like sunlight then shadow on a wooded summer night.

"She was wrong, Dennis. You do know that?"

He looked back but could never answer, because the center of his mind understood, the same secret that Casey's heart could never share. A part of them, no matter how small, would never believe they didn't deserve it.

* * *

 

"Come on, Case. You have to."

"I don't want to go anywhere, Barry." Casey was firm and Barry's eyes turned pleading. He was trying to get her out, to go shopping, tomorrow was her birthday and he wanted to buy her something, why wasn't she excited?

But Casey wasn't excited. She couldn't more, couldn't care, couldn't  _think._

She hadn't slept. Dennis had stepped, broken the hold of a moment Casey still wasn't certain had actually happened. Had cleared his throat and left her there with a too simple, too empty 'goodnight,' his entire expression one of regret for ever telling Casey any of that.

It hurt more than she wanted to admit.

Dawn had found her eyes open, strained and crusted with twisted memory and fears. Resentment and guilt for the pain that etched itself into everyone's lives. Few were lucky to escape, to move unblemished through this world. Were they just luckier? Better than the injured? or were the broken more evolved.

What did it mean to understand darkness, to recognise the face in the shadows? Did it hold worth, that ability to understanding of truth?

Or was it a weight others saw nothing but the affects of, only to blame each heavy expression on a sullen attitude.

"Case, love, you  _have_ to," be batted his eyelashes and took her hands, swinging in place and irritation spiked.

"I don't _want_ to Barry."

"Then don't" Dennis had entered the room and with two words undid all of Barry's imagined progress in convincing Casey to get out of the apartment with him.

"She can't be stuck here all the time," Barry turned on his brother, Dennis had come to a halt and was waiting for Barry to finish, "She'll go insane."

"She can't go out." Dennis's accent felt so much sharper paired next to his brother's, so much rougher. Casey found herself fascinated in the different way they spoke, entirely too worn out to care about the actual words anymore. His voice was felt in the hollows of her chest. She swirled in thought and tried not to focus. Barry hadn't listened to a word she had said. Maybe he would listen to Dennis.

"uh, she's not a prisoner here," he said it in sarcastic obviousness and Dennis's arms folded as if on cue, shoulder cocked a little bit higher. His body made most of his argument for him, its why he got away with using so little words.

"Some one might recognize her."

Barry scoffed, "What are they going to do? the cops are letting her stay here."

"No, Barry. One officer is not reporting her location,  _illegally_. at the risk of his job."

It was meant to force Barry to realize he was being an idiot, but the words worked their way into Casey.

Yet another person was screwing up their lives to help her.

The guilt was getting old.

The guilt was getting old. But when she refocused on the pair she realized Dennis was looking at her. Direct, and dismissive of Barry, like he realized what he had said and was daring her to go down that path of self blame. His eyes held sincerity, but they felt like a mockery of what she had said last night.

That it wasn't true. That she didn't deserve this. Words she had wanted so badly for him to believe. Words he shared back with a mere glance.

He had the strangest knack of letting her be broken without ever letting her be weak.

Barry scoffed and said something else and eventually walked away, mutters trailing after him.

Dennis stepped a half step closer, carefully softening the distance.

"Good morning, Casey." Formal and too low, it stupidly gave her hope. Hope that he hadn't regretted their conversation, wasn't embarrassed of the way she had clung to him, cried into him, not for herself but for  _him._

_"Dennis,"_ her smile was weary and his gaze traced it, concern evident. As was the way his eyes were marked with shadow, and weary lines touched his face.

"Couldn't sleep?" she asked and he nodded, gaze breaking as if embarrassed just to peek it's way back to hers.

"you?" he asked and Casey made a face. His huff of laughter made Casey more alert, more willing to deal with this day.

"So what do you have planned for today?" she asked, brighter, and he shrugged slightly,

"Nothing." he answered, and watched her smile.

"That sounds good."

"What does?" he asked, and she shrugged.

"doing nothing today. it's a nothing sort of day. I'm too tired for it to be something."

He frowned a moment, as if considering, perhaps attempting to translate what she had said, but at last he shrugged, hands finding his pockets, gaze drawing back into something almost shy.

"I could do nothing." he offered it, waiting for her to scoff. But her eyes lit and her fingers caught his sleeve, tugging him towards the couch.

Tomorrow was her birthday. the day she marched into the police and out of this life. out of this place.

Today, doing nothing with Dennis, was all she wanted to do.

* * *

 

Denis had never done nothing before. His actions had purpose, intent. What television he watched was a backdrop for his thoughts to settle into a rhythm that would allow him to sleep. His home life was on a schedule that did not waste effort or time. It was clean. Concise.

Barry left a scattered trail across it sometimes. Jade completely destroyed it.

Casey... shifted it. Didn't break it or dirty it but gave it a little more space, a little less rigid definition. She changed the channels on the television slowly, an action she had adapted in such an unassuming way. But Dennis understood, knew she remembered the way he had cringed at the rapidly changing lights one of the first nights they had sat up together.

She was doing it for him.

He didn't tell her that changing the channels that quickly only bothered him at night, when the flickering light strained his eyes. He didn't bring up that he had noticed her care. But he kept it, that action done for him, in his thoughts. It was small but he remembered it, it was simple but he would not forget.

Dennis was not a fool, he was not a man without reason or thought. He knew that he had softened to her in ways she would never return. But she treated him as an equal, not a freak whose quirks were to be mocked or pitied, not a man whose expression told you to be wary. She took him in as a human being that mattered. It was the least some would ever ask for, it was more than Dennis had learned to expect.

She had been kind, and strong, and soft in the quiet that at times he couldn't stand to be broken. She sought him out and spoke to him out of more than necessity or politeness. She had become and tried to be his friend. And now as she tossed down the remote and muttered good naturedly that there was absolutely nothing to watch, Dennis stayed quiet and merely watched her.

Watched the sunshine that would soon fade out behind clouds. The evidence of life that would soon drift away.

She hadn't mentioned it, hadn't spoken once of what tomorrow would bring for her. It did not seem in this moment she was even thinking of it.

She didn't seem to want to. Not to think and plan and consider what would come next.

She wanted distraction.

It loomed in that moment, memories of the last time Casey had sought distraction with him, the clinging way she had chased out thoughts Dennis hadn't known she struggled against. She had needed his touch and he had given it, he had given it with an urgency that should frighten him, a lack of control that should terrify him but somehow it made him feel stronger, steadier. Being weakened by Casey made him feel the strongest he had ever been.

"Casey," he cleared his throat, earned her attention before he was ready, took a moment to speak. "forgive the question, but I need to know, why did you kiss me?"

There was a ring of gold in her eye that was only evident when they flared wide. He focused on it as her expression paled. Caught off guard. Embarrassed. He shouldn't have asked, it made her uncomfortable, but he needed to understand.

"I, I" pink infused her cheeks, eyes blinked and darted away. It was his intent for her to focus, his need to be direct. That irritable, building need to find an excuse to touch her. His fingers lifted lightly to her jaw, turned gently her face back to his, coaxed her eyes to find the frank honesty in his.

"I'm not angry, Casey." He knew she might doubt him, that she would recall the horrible way he had railed against her, threw her out from the only place she had ever been safe. The skin of her cheek felt cold beneath his fingers, smooth, but too frightened of warmth.

It settled on her like a weight, what she would be facing tomorrow when she walked into that police station and opened up her past. what she would be walking away from.

Jade, this apartment, Barry, and...

Dennis.

"I don't know," She whispered, cheek moving into his touch, seeking softly, "I wish I had a reason Dennis but I just  _wanted_ to, so badly. I should have thought. about what I was doing to you, how  _unfair_  I was being. I  _should_ be sorry,"

Her voice held a tremor as it lowered, her chest rising faster with he pace of her breath. She was afraid of honesty, afraid of never having a chance to say this again.

"I should be, but the truth is, Dennis I'm scared that even knowing everything, given the chance... I would do it again."

An admission of guilt, of shame, but the fingers along her jaw trembled, the eyes that watched her so sternly flared wide with a flash of spark.

"Casey..."

The pad of his thumb traced over the curve of her lip. a flush of heat replaced the coolness of her skin.

It didn't make sense. In this moment this touch would be wrong. But tomorrow?

How could that make all the difference?

Was this really coming down to the hour, was the hand of a clock really what dictated whether this was right or wrong. Come midnight he would be allowed to care?

His eyes focused and chose simple honesty. His hand stilled and he drew back before he spoke.

"So would I."

A gasp that left his fingers aching.

She didn't know what it took to stand and walk away.


	26. Scrap

Her heart still beat too fast. It had been minutes, plenty of them since Dennis had left her sitting alone here but it just wouldn't  _stop._ It played to the rhythm of her thoughts, caught on words, reheard again and again.

_so would I_

Despite everything. Losing his job. Fighting with Barry. All the lies and trouble she had caused. Despite every way she had hurt him, he would choose her touch again.

what was  _wrong_ with them?

Casey stifled a laugh, the giddy kind that came from being way too tired and an over active heart. Is this what it felt like, to be happy, to be caught up in someone more than you?

To be cared for? Wanted in a  _good_  way? A way she could want back?

She knew why Dennis walked away. She was still seventeen for crying out loud, he would not be making that mistake again.

but he  _wanted_ to.

That should  _not_ be making her that happy. But she was. She lifted a couch cushion and hugged it, letting herself relax into the couch.

Jade came in and found her like that, smiling into an empty room, completely oblivious.

It would have freaked her out if Jade didn't know exactly where this girl was coming from.

Men. Gosh they pulled the stupid right out of you. Made your face do stupid things, made your heart do even dumber.

She had seen Luke for a few days now and there was nothing about the man she didn't like. There had to be something, and she was bound and determined to find it before she did something stupid and got her heart involved.

Because it was  _not_  already involved. That was obvious.

Casey's face would have made her laugh, Jade would have liked to just laugh it off and walk away, but she knew she couldn't do that. Regardless of how much she did not want to ruin the good mood she had had all morning, Casey's face told her there was something she needed to do.

She was just not in the mood to do it right now.

She left Casey on the couch and went to shower.

* * *

Barry came home with groceries and a smile. He pulled Jade into the kitchen and started whispering. Dennis walked in on a heated debate.

"Why on  _earth_  would she want to have to make her own birthday cake. That defeats the purpose of it being a birthday cake!" Jade hissed at her brother and Barry turned to Dennis for support.

"Ugh, Dennis, tell her, this is a great idea."

"It's not even an idea. It's you being lazy," Jade interrupted and Dennis pointedly waiting for them to stop bickering.

"What is the idea." he asked, and watched Barry wave at the bags he had placed haphazardly all over the previously neat counter.

"To have a baking party! for Casey. We can make a cake, decorate it, it will be fun!"

Dennis did  _not_ look impressed, but as Jade watched him, his eyes scanned the room, turned thoughtful, softened as his lips moved with a ghost of a smile.

That look, that light and buoyant look that Jade had seen in Casey. Dennis didn't wear it as evidently but it was  _there._ Jade was worried now, more than she liked. More than she ever wanted to be.

"Do you have a recipe?" Dennis asked.

"Uh, well yeah," Barry slapped his pockets, caught off guard by the question, looking for his phone. He spotted it on the counter and snagged it, pulled up the recipe and handed it to Dennis.

Dennis took it, brow furrowing as he read the small script, frowning before he looked up at both of them.

"When did you want to do this?"

Barry shrugged, taking advantage of Jade's odd silence, "Like an hour?"

"Hmm…" Dennis made note of the web address for the recipe and handed Barry his phone back. "I'll set it up."

Barry didn't know what Dennis thought had to be set up, but he was too excited to have his brother's support and Jade's sudden relenting silence that he all but drug his sister out of the room.

"Good, great, we'll keep Casey distracted."

Dennis crossed to his laptop and pulled up the recipe, missing the way Jade's gaze lingered as Barry hurried her away.

* * *

 

Barry pulled Casey out of her room, excited and rambling about how he knew her birthday wasn't technically until  _tomorrow_  but since she'd be busy they really should do something now and how he just knew she was going to love it even if Jade did think it was a stupid idea.

He led her into the kitchen that way, not giving her space to respond, to consider exactly what she would be busy doing tomorrow. To realize that she only had one night here left. He glazed over all of that and propelled her into the kitchen with a childish "tada!"

Casey looked around the kitchen in confusion. There were bowls set out on the counter, full of different things. "um… thanks?"

"It's a  _baking party_." Barry took her shoulders, moved her towards the counter, "We're going to make a cake!"

It made since then, what she was seeing. Bowls holding each ingredient, ready and measured just to be dumped together and stirred. It was too neat, too perfectly arranged. She knew Barry had not done this.

Dennis had. Dennis had helped Barry surprise her. Had remembered one silly little conversation they had had late at night about baking. That she would like it if all the hard stuff was done.

Dennis had done that. He had stood there and measured out flour in a pristine kitchen knowing full well she and Barry were going to destroy it attempting to bake together.

Barry looked back at her and saw her smile, the kind that came from the eyes first and spread to the heart. The kind that could only mean happiness.

"You really like it?" he asked, shy now, but playing it off like of course she did.

Casey hugged him to hide her face, to hide the stupid tears of overwhelming happiness that she didn't know what to do with. She was being stupid, and childish, and such a  _girl_  but Casey didn't care. She felt light. She was having a birthday party. A real one, not something thrown together four days late with discount streamers and stale mislabeled cake that one time her uncle had remembered.

She was celebrating, and it was  _nice._

Tomorrow didn't matter. It couldn't, there'd be no joy if she considered what loomed ahead. She peeked over the neatly printed recipe and let Barry fuss over not having an apron. She imagined Dennis in his room down the hall and wondered if maybe he would come out.

When Barry got frosting on her face, she considered it was probably a good thing if he didn't.

The cake was in the oven when the front door opened, Hedwig bounding in with Jade. He hugged Casey and showed her his drawing; he had made it just for her. It was all of them at the park, Barry and Jade, Miss Patricia, Casey and Dennis. He had labeled it 'my family.'

It looked like a family, wobbly drawn stick figures all grouped together. He had put a scarf on Barry, drawn Dennis by far the largest, and stuck Casey right in between them. It hurt a little, wondering if Hedwig knew what would happen tomorrow, that she would be leaving again. She wondered if anyone had told the boy what no one had bothered to talk about all week.

They had left it alone, let Casey be. Let the days play out in peace. She would have to face this whether they talked about it or not. She was grateful, grateful that they had given her that time, that quiet. But as Hedwig whined that they had to wait for the cake to cool, Casey saw it settling on Barry, that heaviness. That realization that not talking about it didn't mean it wasn't going to happen.

He hugged her suddenly, too tightly, too seriously, and Casey clung to him, let her cheek rest against his arms and her eyes stare down the hall.

Where was Dennis? She wanted him out there,  _with_ them. With  _her._

She didn't see Jade studying her, didn't see her sigh. Set down her cup and straighten up before moving determinedly down the hall.

* * *

 

Jade knocked on Dennis's door and he answered, assumed she wanted the room, went to clear out without really speaking but Jade stopped him.

"Look, Dennis, we need to talk."

Her tone wasn't exactly cordial and he cocked a silent brow at her in a way that would seem daunting to someone who wasn't Jade. she purposefully corrected her tone, gentled it.

"It's about Casey."

And there it was, that spark, that defensive shift into something too  _cold_  she knew he was locking a whole lot inside.

He had been avoiding, letting the celebration play out without him. He didn't want his presence dampening the mood, knew Casey would try to be careful with the mess if he was there. He wanted her to have fun.

But he didn't know if he could see it. If he could watch the joy in her eyes knowing she was planning on leaving tomorrow. Didn't know if he could watch her without watching the clock.

"Sometimes, with trauma..." Jade's words came out of nowhere, and Dennis focused on her.

Jade grimaced, looking for words. This felt too formal, too stiff and Jade abruptly rolled her eyes, took Dennis's arm and directed him to sit, to listen while she worked out the words he would not want to hear.

"Look. There's a thing that happens to some people when they leave abusive situations. They have no concept of kindness, of being treated with decency. If they find it, sometimes they latch on. It's something that they've never had before and because of that it feels like it means a lot more than it actually does."

Dennis just blinked at her.

"She stares at you like you're the rock she wants to climb on, Dennis."

His frown was immediate, arms crossing as his gaze directed itself elsewhere, dismissing, "What are you saying."

Jade was not deterred.

"She's young, out of a bad situation, she'll cling to any scrap of decency she can find. I think you gave her that. and it was good at first, but it's not healthy. It's nothing against you, Dennis. She needs strength right now and you practically reek with it. But I think she's latching on. She thinks she's feeling more than she does."

His gaze was empty when it turned back to hers, as if merely waiting for her to finish.

"Look, I've seen it, okay, more than once. It never ends well. You need to know that, for Casey's sake. If, if you freaking care about that girl at all, then let her heal. Let her be. You need to back off, let her live, be young. Grow up. Have some shot at normalcy."

He didn't respond. The empty in his eye made Jade sad. He removed so much to protect himself, protect his heart from showing, from giving her any indication of just how hard what she had said was hitting him.

"Uh, Dennis?" she asked after a moment or two, and Dennis stood.

"I'll take that into consideration."

She really wasn't surprised when he walked away.

* * *

Dennis went out. Walked by Casey and out into the world, where the bustle of filth would mark him, distract his thoughts, redirect the frustration building beneath his skin. He was angry. angrier still because he knew Jade was right.

Not a word she had said hadn't made some sense, hadn't agreed with logic and what part of Dennis didn't already know. Casey needed time to grow and to live and decide who she even wanted to be. She needed a future, the kind he worked so hard for Barry to have, that he was willing to sacrifice everything for his brother. The thought of Casey not having that. Not having the freedom, the options, the desire to branch out and be everything she should be. It tore at him.

She couldn't settle. couldn't accept that's this is what her life was now. Shouldn't have to fall for the first scrap of kindness. She deserved so much more. More than he could ever give her. More than she would ever find if he was around.

She needed a chance. and Dennis wasn't it.

Hedwig was gone by the time her returned. The party was over.

He found Casey in her room. Drank in the way her eyes brightened when she saw him, the color that rose, the soft curve of her lips into a smile that held no effort, no strain. He drank in her, and did the only thing he could.

"It was a mistake, Casey." He was speaking before she could, cold and hard and completely detached. He watched the light falter behind her eye.

"You never should have done it and I never should have let you. "

Her lips tried to let words out but Dennis couldn't let that happen, couldn't trust himself to be firm if she spoke out against him, if he heard her asking him to stop.

"It can never happen again."

It was still there, the denial, the not understanding in her eye. He felt panic edge in, his resolve failing. Words came and he spoke them, memories of words hurled at him all those years ago. Echoes of his mother's voice that gave him what he needed to say to break from Casey.

"I'm the mistake you'll wish you never made."

He turned.

He walked away.


	27. Hope

Casey didn't  _understand._

She didn't know how to try to.

She felt hollow, but worse. Like if hollow had gotten emptied out.

Midnight came and she watched the numbers on her phone, digits that should have changed everything.

Twelve am should have given her freedom.

Given her hope.

Given her  _him._

Casey threw her phone against the wall.

It didn't break.

With a sigh, she retrieved it. She set an alarm in some laughing mockery of the idea that she would sleep. She got out her boxes. One by one she filled them, void thoughts processing what she was packing. Her life in a box, bland and small. Objects that couldn't shape who she was, couldn't hold a history, couldn't give her a future. They were useless weight and space. But she packed them neatly and set them aside, ready to carry them out and away from here. Ready to dump them wherever she would go next and never touch them again.

_Wherever she would go next._

She should have thought about that.

She should have thought about a lot of things.

All that quiet she had been so grateful for suddenly came back to mock her. She should have filled it, with plans and actions and thoughts that didn't involve  _him._ Casey knew better. She should have been prepared.

She had eight hours before the detective came for her, and eighteen year old Casey Cooke made a plan.

* * *

David Dunn wasn't happy. He supposed he could try to be, try to see the glass half full in life, but he had seen too much of what life was full of to fall for that. He stood at the door of what could have been the worst mistake of his career, letting a missing girl stay missing with a man he didn't trust, and suddenly wanted to just walk away.

He knew what was going to happen when he drug that poor girl into that police station. They'd try to help but what could they really do?

But no, he couldn't think like that. He had to believe there was good in the system, that it could work, could help the people he fought for. He had to believe his job mattered, because it was far too tempting to want to step past it and take matters into his own hands.

He knocked once, knowing they would be expecting him. It took Jade longer than it should have to answer, and she did not look pleased to see him. She stepped back to let him in, arms crossed over her chest and hip popped as she stared him down.

"You knew this was coming, Jade."

His voice was so reasonable it was hard to be angry in response, to hold against words Jade couldn't fight against. Her arms dropped and she sighed, gaze darting away, before she settled another look on him.

"I'll go get her." Her voice was quieter than David Dunn was expecting. Softer with the kind of heavy care that weighed.

Jade left him there and walked down the hall, knocked softly on the closed door at the end.

"Hey Case? He's here."

Jade wasn't stupid, she knew this had to happen. Casey couldn't just hide around scared of someone who never should have been able to touch her. Casey needed out and this was the way to do it.

That didn't mean Jade had to like it. That didn't mean Jade wasn't aware how this might go. Casey was taking a chance but it was the only chance she had. She needed a shot at life, not settling for hiding, for the people she hid with. She wanted Casey to stay a part of their makeshift family but she wanted it to be a part of the life that Casey lived, not what dictated it. Casey needed to go out and do more, be more. Become who she would be when she was free.

"I'll be right out." Casey's voice barely made it through the door, and Jade didn't press. When Barry stepped out of his room, Jade took him down the hall, out to where the detective was waiting, giving Casey time to come out when she was ready.

* * *

She was ready to go. There was no reason to wait, to stall. No reason not to open that door and walk down the hall. But that would be the end, of this peace, of this calm.

Of this home.

But she didn't need that, didn't need them to hide her, she could do it herself. She would have to.

They had done so much for her, been so much to her, set a light burning at the end of a tunnel that had been dark for as long as she could remember.

A tunnel she had tricked herself into thinking she wouldn't have to walk through. She thought she could skip all that. Half convinced herself that she had stumbled into a family that she would get to keep. But she should have known there was no easy out.

And that was okay.

Because she would get out anyway. She had run on her own and made it this far. She knew how to make herself small, make herself strong. She knew how to make it through just about anything.

Even this. Even words she never thought she would hear.

_I'm the mistake you'd wish you never made._

She heard voices when she finally made it into the hall, conversation drifting from the living room. Dennis's voice wasn't among them.

She wanted to see him, to say good bye. To say thank you. To tell him he was wrong, that they could be friends, that she needed that.

Maybe he would listen.

Maybe she was being foolish. Maybe Casey should be angry.

But what she felt when Dennis stepped into view wasn't fear. It wasn't anger. Her body jolted in an eager type of relief.

Dennis froze, questioning his decision to step into this hall, wondering how he ever thought he could avoid seeing her.

There, coming down his hall, eyes settled with too much intent on him, was Casey. He couldn't pass by that and pretend he hadn't seen. He couldn't ignore and find another distraction.

"Casey." He greeted her, nodded once, heard the cold in his voice. Mentally he grimaced for not asking if she was okay, if she needed anything, all the things he should say but couldn't.

"Dennis." she answered just as quietly, stopping in front of him. Her hand gripped her arm, uncertain, eyes faltering as if shy.

"The detective is here." Dennis stated unnecessarily. She stayed in silence, head dipped but eyes lifting, catching his. Timid. It reminded him of when she had first come here, nervous around Barry's touch. He wondered if she was afraid, at the way his voice had hardened, almost cracked. If she was angry at him.

If he was doing the right thing.

He couldn't do this, lay hurt atop what she already bore, cut her out from a place she felt safe. He couldn't  _hurt_  her.

But if he stepped forward, if he closed that gap and closed down that voice of reason in his head. If he pressed for a touch he wanted with every part of him, what if that hurt Casey far worse.

What if it held her back and kept her down. If she stepped into this just to regret it later, when her life never moved past to anything better than him. If he became the mistake she wished she had never made.

If he cared, if he was strong, he would step back and let her by. If he was worth anything he would protect her. He could do it. For her, he could do anything.

"You're going to be okay, Casey."

It filled her eyes, the hope, the care, the fading acceptance as he nodded once, stepped aside to let her by. She lifted her chin and kept walking, proof that she would be okay.

She had to believe that.

They both did.

* * *

David Dunn was nice, in an almost awkward, interesting way. He held doors and helped her carry things and stood by patiently while she said goodbye. But Jade and Barry had come with her, refused to let her go anywhere near that police station without them. David Dunn didn't try to argue, you couldn't when Jade and Barry got on the same side.

But she wouldn't let them come in with her. She couldn't be strong if they cared. It would break her. She couldn't be broken.

Barry hugged her for a long time. Too long. She was blinking fast when he let her go, fighting the burning tears. Jade didn't hug her, whether for Casey's sake or her own, Casey wasn't sure.

"We'll see you after, Case."

It stopped her.

"You, you will?"

She hadn't considered that.

"Of course we will," Jade scoffed, like it was obvious. Like the thought that this was goodbye had never even occurred to her. "you may be moving out, but we're still friends."

No one understood why she was crying.

"We're not letting you do this alone, babygirl," Barry was hugging her again, hiding the fact that his voice broke, pretending like Casey was just being silly for her tears to stop himself from just plain breaking down. "You do what you gotta do in there, sweetheart. You can tell us all about it when you're done." He stepped back, wiped a thumb across the tears on her cheek, "Or don't, either way, we'll wait here."

When David Dunn took her arm and walked with her inside, she wasn't shaking. When she made her report she was cold, but she wasn't alone.

* * *

It was still light when she stepped outside. She was surprised. It had felt like hours, days, but the sun still shone and she lifted her face to it. David Dunn met Barry and Jade as they came forward. Talked so Casey didn't have to. She was so tired of talking.

"There's a temporary restraining order in place until they investigate further and see if there's enough to charge him with. She did remarkably well." A simple statement but a high compliment coming from the man who had stoically not left Casey's side. It was an odd form of comfort, but she was getting used to it, was thankful for it. Quiet strength that reminded her of quiet strength, an aching balm that she didn't want to do without.

"Of course she did, she's tough," Jade nudged her arm then shivered in a sudden gust of wind. The cold felt good on Casey's skin, felt alive, and a little bit like hope.

He couldn't get to her. For now, she was hidden with the law on her side. A piece of paper wouldn't stop her uncle but it would give people like David Dunn the legal right to fight for her. Protect her just not in secret. Made her think that this would actually work.

"So what now?" Barry asked, his hands burrowing into his pockets, standing almost casually against the wind. He looked so easy, so warm and Casey felt a small grin tug.

"What do you mean?"

"Well," Barry shrugged, "you got your stuff out of our place but never told us where you were going now."

"Oh, well I," Casey flushed a little, worried that her lately made plan would sound foolish saying out loud. "I was gonna find a motel, get another job…" she trailed off at Barry's look. He didn't look impressed.

"you could just come ba-"

"That wasn't the deal," David Dunn cut Barry off with a slight level of force in his tone. He hadn't put his career on the line to get Casey here just to send her back to a place he still wasn't sure about. He hadn't missed the fact that Dennis wasn't here, a glaring omission of someone who had fought so hard to keep Casey safe. He shared a look with Jade that showed she understood, that she approved even.

"Oh is it really so much better that she just finds some motel?" Barry shot back, and Casey took his arm.

"Barry, I'll be fine."

"There is another option," David Dunn began, and all eyes turned to him. "I know some students at a college who are renting a place together and are looking for a roommate. They're a good group, and she'll blend in with the college crowd. She'd be safe and she might even like it."

Casey was looking at Detective Dunn, wondering how much thought he had put into this, if he had spent time looking for a place for her. He barely knew her. She had caused him nothing but trouble and he was doing more than he ever had to to help her.

"I, I could try it." She answered softly. She didn't like thinking about moving in with a bunch of people she didn't know, but if it was safer, better than a cold empty room in a run down motel, maybe she should take it.

The detective grinned, quickly, before pulling out his phone, telling whoever he had called that she had agreed to come as Barry came forward and looped her arm with his.

"New roommates, huh. Well, let's not get too excited. There's no way they'll be better than your last."

Jade laughed, bumping her brother's arm, "well, except maybe for Dennis."

Barry chuckled and Casey shivered, stepping a fraction closer, not letting her face lose the sunshine, or her heart lose this hope.


	28. Believe

Casey couldn't believe it. She physically, literally, and mentally could not comprehend how this was happening.

"So, hey…" The boy from the café stood in front of her, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck, looking more than a little embarrassed.

"What are you doing here?" Casey asked, frozen on the steps of where she would be living, staring at what could  _not_ be one of her roommates.

"Well," the boy looked past her to where David Dunn stood behind her, one of her boxes in his arms, patiently waiting for Casey to move so he could set it down inside. "You didn't tell her?"

Casey turned in sharp confusion, "You knew? About  _him?"_ She somehow managed to fit her opinion of their entire interactions into a single word, and Detective Dunn sighed.

"Yes, my son is how I found you."

He stepped by Casey with her box, ignoring the shock on her face at his statement. He calmly set the box down and passed by her to get another from his car. "If it helps," he paused before stepping out, "he said he was sorry for being a jerk."

Joseph Dunn laughed a little self-consciously, "Yeah…I was kind of a jerk. And I am sorry 'bout that."

Casey stood, not responding, not willing to get angry but not willing to say it was okay. She was on unexpected ground and just chose to do nothing.

"I didn't mean to rat you out, my dad just thought you might be in trouble. And I knew you were looking for a place to stay, so…" He shrugged a little, not at all thrown off by her cold expression. She had been stoic a lot in school too.

"Do you live here?" her curiosity barely reached her tone, everything about her question fell flat and Joseph shifted awkwardly, sending his dad a glance as he entered before answering.

"Uh no, not yet anyway. I will after I graduate." He smiled again, the easy kind of smile that Casey didn't return.

"Come on," David Dunn gestured with the box he held, "Let's get you settled," he passed his son and nodded towards the door, "there's more boxes in the car."

Joseph obediently ducked out, leaving David to lead Casey to where she would be saying. She still wasn't quite sure why she had agreed to this, or why David Dunn was the one helping her move, but he had a way of making suggestions that were hard to say no to. He wasn't pushy really, just so matter of fact that what he said made too much sense.

Splitting rent with some college kids would be cheaper and keep her settled in a safe location. She might even make friends. Those were Dunn's word, not hers. The fact that Joseph was his son was something she hadn't bothered to process yet.

It was a simple place, small, neat enough but there was dust in the corners, on the lights. Places Dennis would have never missed when he cleaned. There wasn't as much space, as much light, but that shouldn't matter. It would do.

Her room was scarcely larger than a closet, but she didn't care. At least she wouldn't be sharing it with anyone. Both other rooms they had passed had two beds in them. Casey had signed on for housemates, she wouldn't be able to handle a roommate.

They'd finished lugging in her few boxes when the others got home. Two girls came in first, and Casey was struck by their smiles, the kind of glossy confidence that was both offsetting and drew you to them. Joseph introduced them as Claire and Marcia. He stood closer to Casey than she would have liked but she found if she let him talk, she really didn't have to.

He told them all about her, about how they'd gone to high-school together, but she'd gotten her GED. He made it sound like they were old friends, like she was going to fit in great here. Part of Casey wondered if it was intentional, if some of David Dunn's direct intention had rubbed off on his son. Joseph painted a likeable picture of her, and never said a word about her uncle.

"She's quiet, but she's just shy," Joseph said when he finished, bumping Casey's arm and sending her a warm smile. Casey told herself to smile back, to fit in here, to be simple and easy going and just let the days play out.

She excused herself to go get her room set up, heard them say the other roommate, Orwell, would be home later. She finished her room before she reached for her phone. She had promised to let Barry know how today had went. He had class all day or would have been here. Part of her had wished he had been, he would have made it so easy. The other part of her knew she was better off doing this on her own. Barry would have brought a light she would have missed too keenly when it was gone. She needed to get settled here first, used to the even tone days.

_All settled in_

His reply was almost immediate.

-I was wondering, bbgirl way to make a man wait! so how is it any devilishly charming roommates I should be concerned about-

Casey rolled her eyes  _don't worry, you're still my favorite. For now._

-for always-

Her phone buzzed again before she could reply

-do you like it so far-

Casey frowned, staring at the little cursor blinking on her phone, wishing suddenly that she  _had_  brought Barry here, that he had filled the halls with senseless commentary about things Casey hadn't even noticed.

_It seems nice._

It wasn't a lie, there wasn't anything about being here that she should be unhappy about. Except maybe Joseph, but even he had proven to be useful.

She just missed them. Missed being home.

Missed him.

With a sigh Casey shot Barry another text.

_Hey, I gotta go. Been a long day, I'm turning in soon._

-k doll lets meet up soon goodiite!-

Casey set her phone down and laid down in her new room, wondering if she was ready for her new life.

* * *

Barry was busy all week. Jade was out of town again and he had exams. He kept promising her the weekend and Casey was counting the days. It was strange, being in a new place again, learning new people, looking for new work. Claire and Marcia were surprisingly easy to get along with in that Casey didn't really have to get along with them. They were cheerful and polite but very much did their own thing. They would invite Casey when they went out but did not seem to mind that she didn't join them. It was exactly the kind of superficial relationship Casey had wanted in a roommate. It was exactly the kind she had not gotten before, and she tried to pretend she didn't miss it.

But she didn't want friendships with these people, she wanted her old ones back. She felt guilty even as she thought it. Jade and Barry were still actively involved, texting her, reaching out, being her friend.

But Dennis had been silent. Whether by intent or not, the others hadn't even mentioned him. It was like moving out had cut all ties. She should have expected that. She  _had_  expected that, she had just expected it to happen with all of them. Still having the others and not him somehow made it that much worse.

David Dunn texted her early on Friday, asking if he could stop by after work. He had checked in a few times. Short texts and simple updates of what was going on with her uncle. There hadn't been much news, still working in the preliminary investigation to see if there was enough to take this to trial. When he asked if he could stop by, Casey figured he had news. She told herself not to hope it was good news.

* * *

Detective Dun stared at Casey's response on his phone, a simple 'yeah sure.' She never really talked much. He wondered how she would take the news.

He'd just gotten off the phone with the prosecutor. Despite being an incredibly busy woman she had taken the time to let him know the verdict. A simple, "I'm sorry, David, but there's just not enough here to press charges. I wish there was but there isn't any evidence."

He wanted to argue there was Casey's testimony, but they both knew that wasn't enough. He had thanked her and hung up the phone. Stared at it for too long before texting Casey.

This was the part of the job he hated. When he knew what was right but the law said otherwise. He lifted a folder off of his desk, filled with what he had on Casey's case. It was the thinnest folder on his desk.

A sudden noise at the front had him glancing up, what he saw had him tightening his grip on the phone. Casey's uncle stood in the door way, looking deceptively put together and entirely too smug. He had come in for the news, that they wouldn't pursue charges, that he was a free man. He caught Dunn's eyes and something almost sick flashed in his gaze. That gleam of veiled victory that you might miss if you weren't used to men like this. The twisted kind that could hide behind a polite smile, that type of charm that hid his gloating.

"Detective!" John held out a hand and David Dunn told himself to take it, to shake the hand of the man who had hurt an innocent girl. To be professional, an officer of the law. "Guess you've heard the verdict too, huh? It's a shame, you know," the larger man's gaze dropped ruefully and David stood silent, reclaiming his hand and flexing it in subdued agitation at his side, "I don't know why she felt the need to go and do something like that. She's always been wild, but I didn't know she was that hurtful. Kids, I guess we just do our best and hope they turn out better." He sighed, a tired parent, "you got a boy of your own, don't ya? I'm sure you know how it is."

A laugh, a smile, that gleam in his eye that made David Dunn's vision swirl with a hate that should have frightened him.

He stepped one foot closer, "Let me be clear," the other officers were too far away to hear the words, to see the threat in David Dunn's eyes, "You are done with her. You try again and it won't be the law that stops you."

David Dunn stepped back, read the challenge, the scoffing hate in the other man's eye. "Excuse me," He made himself nod, drop the folder on his desk and walk away.

He didn't look back to see the man's gaze drop to a folder that had fallen open, printed information evident on the page. He passed by an officer and told him to see the uncle out. He stepped into a quiet hall and made a phone call.

It rang once before a man's voice answered, even, with a touch of impatience. David Dunn stifled his own anger before speaking.

"I told you I'd call if there's news. The charges were dropped."

A solid curse filled the line.

"She's still safe." David Dunn felt the need to add, some inane attempt to soften the news. There was silence.

Then, "Thank you for the update."

David Dunn grimaced, he didn't have to sound so cold.

Then the line went dead.

* * *

Casey was waiting when David Dunn arrived.

He looked grim, met her on the steps and led her to a seat in a way that felt equally professional and protective. She had come to like David Dunn. He could be involved without being oppressive, seemed to think it was his duty now to look out for her. Part of her wanted to tell him to get lost, she didn't need him. The other part of her admitted it was nice, was jealous of Joseph that he had a parent that was still around, still cared.

"I talked to the prosecutor," Never one to not get to the point, Detective David Dunn faced her squarely, "And they say there's not enough evidence. They believe you, Casey, that it happened, but there's not enough to charge him with."

Casey blinked once. Twice. Cleared her throat and crossed her arms. "So what now?"

He eyed her warily, unsure of whether she was okay as she seemed.

"It's still filed in the system that you pressed charges and if he tries anything else, you'll have that to back you. They'll lift the temporary restraining order, and your uncle will be free. But he doesn't know where you are, Casey, and he has no legal claim to you. You're still safe."

Casey scoffed, "until he finds me again." Her voice sounded dead, and David frowned.

"But now he knows you'll push back, Casey. He knows if he tries, you'll fight and you have people to protect you."

Casey didn't look convinced, but she didn't fall apart either. She just looked… numb.

"Look, Casey, I know this isn't the justice either of us wanted, but you did your part and you can live now without hiding. He can't find you, Casey, and it won't be worth the risk to him even if he thinks he can. I made that clear."

"You spoke to him?" Casey asked and she watched David Dunn falter, swallow his words and look away. It was an admittance he hadn't intended to make, and she wondered what that conversation had looked like.

"I have to go. But call me if you need anything. I mean that, Casey." His voice was stern but his eyes were kind.

Casey nodded once, watched him leave and stood in the cool breeze.

It was over but she wasn't free. They couldn't force her back to her uncle but they couldn't keep him away from her. She was still stuck in that shadow, and she was beginning to believe she would never get out.

Her phone buzzed and she answered it, hearing Barry's voice come through.

"Plain or pepperoni?"

"What?" casey asked, wondering why there was an echo on the line.

"Yeah, I figured you wouldn't know so I brought both."

Casey turned around, Barry stood on the lawn, two boxes of pizza in hand.

"Barry! What are you doing here?"

"Um, I'm here to see you," he bounded up the steps and grinned at her, holding up the pizza, "Hungry?"


	29. Done

Barry was still there when the girls came home. The looks they sent eachother had Barry preening. They stayed in the livingroom, laughing and chatting like it wasn't the most they had spent in the same room with Casey yet, but Casey didn't mind. Orwell had late classes, and Barry was still there when he came in.

He was a little awkward, a little on the bigger side with wide cheeks and too small eyes. His voice had surprised Casey, it was deep and flowed with the cadence of a wizened professor. He was Claire's cousin, which explained how he had ended up sharing a house with the two girls. He didn't seem the type they would usually hang out with. Claire thought he was the nicest person you could meet, but that he could bore a sleeping nun.

Casey actually didn't mind him. He talked about things Casey didn't know much about, but he didn't mind questions, even stupid ones. He was patient when he explained things that made it seem like he could be a great professor one day. She never really talked to him about anything important, but she was learning a lot about history.

Barry finally left when Orwell said he was going to bed. They had no chance to talk, for Casey to tell him what had happened but when he hugged her goodnight she could tell that he knew. Maybe David Dunn had reached out and suggested he come over. When he pulled back he looked at her with the tight kind of sorrow in his eyes.

"We'll talk tomorrow, okay hun?"

Casey nodded, hugging him again before telling him goodnight. Marcia and Claire were still talking when she came back in.

"Girl, you have got to tell me where you find friends that fine. First Joseph and now this?"

Casey just smiled and waved goodnight as the girls gushed over getting Barry's phone number. Part of her was trying to figure out how they managed to find Joseph attractive. The other part was trying to imagine their response if they ever met Dennis.

She dreamed about him. The kind of dream that lingers even after the images fade away. But the feelings, the light lingers into the next day, into her thoughts. A constant pull at the back of her mind that she tried to ignore.

Barry texted around lunch time, said he was stopping by with surprise number two.

It turns out Hedwig was ecstatic to see her new home. He stayed for a few hours, playing games that Barry had brought. Casey played with him, let him win and laughed at how excited he got. He reminded her of Barry.

Then he'd blink at her through his glasses and she would have to look away.

She tried to ask, casually, about Dennis. Barry didn't catch the strain in her voice.

"Oh he's good. I think. I hardly see him, I've been so busy with school. I'm still in line for that contest you know. But he's been studying a lot. Been quiet, but I guess he always is, so." Barry shrugged like it didn't matter, then dropped his arm over her shoulder, nudging her a little.

"How are you?" she knew what he was asking, and she gave him a small smile.

"I'm okay. I expected it, really, and I'm doing good here."

She didn't tell him about the anger. The times she wanted to throw things wondering why she had bothered, why she had tried if it wasn't going to fix anything. Barry gave her shoulders a squeeze.

"I'm always around to talk, babygirl. About anything."

"I know." Casey leaned forward to move her piece across the candyland board and settled back against Barry, "thank you for coming over."

He grinned cheekily, "I knew your roommates would want to see me."

Casey just rolled her eyes.

* * *

She missed them when they left. Got a text from Jade that said she would be around on Wednesday, and she promised they would meet up. She spent the next few days looking for work. She was in the college part of town so there were plenty of jobs, but plenty of people looking. She filled out plenty of applications but didn't have much hope in hearing back. It kept her out of the apartment though, which was nice because Joseph had been around a lot lately. He didn't even seem to have a reason why. He was friends with the others and planned to be moving in soon, but that didn't mean he had to be there  _now._

The others didn't think much of it, so Casey just tried to pretend it was normal. He mostly left her alone, would sit out in the living room and play video games while Casey read in her room. She wondered if David Dunn knew his son was skipping school and was half tempted to call him and find out.

But Casey didn't. Because like it or not, Joseph had smoothed the way for her being here and she was grateful for that.

He was there Tuesday evening when Casey came out for a drink. He didn't even look up when she walked by. She grabbed a soda and dropped onto a chair in the living room, wanting a change of scenery, and watched the medieval characters fight it out on the screen.

Joseph paused the game and went to get up when Casey's phone rang. She didn't recognize the number, and thinking it might be from a place she had applied to, Casey answered quickly.

There was a beat of silence after she said hello. An exhalation of breath that had the tiny hairs on her arm standing up straight.

"Hello caseybear."

Casey shot to her feet, eyes wide, chest so tight it wouldn't let air through, felt like it would compress her heart until it would stop beating. This, this shouldn't be happening. Joseph looked up in alarm, took one look at her face and was fumbling for his own phone. She watched in dazed confusion as Joseph dialed a number then stepped close to her.

"Put it on speaker," he hissed, and his words made just enough sense for Casey to obey.

A chuckle came through the line, "Surprised? You think I'd let you go?"

Her uncle's voice filled the livingroom, a raspy, sick sound she hoped she would never hear again.

"Ill  _never_  let you go, caseybear. I'm all you have. I took care you, you ungrateful slut, you  _owe me_."

Casey's eyes were fixed on Joseph's phone, the call was connected to his father. Detective David Dunn was hearing every word. Her hand tightened on her phone,

" _I don't owe you anything."_

Joseph's eyes searched her face at the tremulous anger in her tone, he nodded encouragingly for her to keep going, and Casey let herself get angry.

"You think I'd stay after what you did to me?"

Her uncle scoffed, "I fed you. I clothed you. I  _loved_  you. You  _made_  me hurt you when you disobeyed, Casey. If you had been good I never would have had to."

"Well I wont  _obey_ you any more. You're never going to touch me again."

She remembered suddenly, Dennis's words, after she had first told David Dunn everything, that she should be proud of what she had done. She hadn't believed him. She had wanted to, but just couldn't.

She could be proud of this.

" _I'm. not. Yours."_

She saw Joseph smile, brow raise as he nodded, impressed with the steel in her tone. His surprise made her stronger. She could do this.

"Don't say that, Caseybear. You'll always be mine. You'll understand that after you come home. And you have some time to calm down. I can forgive you, you know. For running away. You just have to come home and behave."

"Never." She was too angry to use more words, too worried her voice would crack under the strain.

"You shouldn't say that, Casey."

Casey's blood went cold. Something had changed in her uncle's voice. She knew that tone. She had heard it too many times. She knew the angry, pleading reason that he would use whenever she hid and he would beg her to come out. But this was the tone that would come after. When he had spotted her and she didn't know it yet. They way he spoke when he knew where she was hiding and was just toying with her now.

"Really caseybear, this doesn't have to be hard. Now are you going to come out or am I going to have to come in there and get you.'

Joseph's gaze went wide, locked with her own panicked one in a stretch of silence that was broken when his phone buzzed in his hand. He glanced down and read the text that filled the screen. When he looked at Casey and nodded, something almost gleeful filled her with a bite that tasted like the dark edge of a blade.

"Come and get me." Casey said, and hung up the phone.

* * *

The door swung open to a dark house, the squeak of hinges faint over the sound of her heart plastering its pulse against her ears. She was crammed practically on top of Joseph in the back corner of a pitch black closet. Joseph atleast wasn't shaking.

He wasn't exactly comforting either. But he was a presence in the darkness and she was thankful for it as she listened to the heavy footfalls thudding nearer.

"Caseybear…" It drifted, not a voice but a haunting, something that didn't belong in this world, and this time, Joseph shuddered.

"You're much too old to hide."

Something thudded and she heard a curse, her uncle had run into something. There was anger now. "Come out, Casey, and we'll just go. I won't punish you for this."

Casey's lips parted, not to speak, but to let out a breath before it choked her. Joseph's hand shot over her mouth, misreading her and in a panic, Casey bit it.

His scuff of pain was quickly choked back but it echoed with the pounding in her ears. What if her uncle heard that?

Realistically she knew it didn't matter. Detective Dunn was coming, he had to be. Heck from Jospeh's reaction when her phone had rung it almost seemed like they had planned this all along, but Casey didn't want to think about how that was even possible right now. She was trapped in the never ending cycle of hiding in fear just to be found by a man who would never stop.

Who could never be stopped.

But she wasn't a child anymore. She wasn't alone anymore. And she wasn't hiding. any. more.

Joseph didn't know what to do when Casey suddenly scrambled to her feet, but he cursed audibly when she kicked the closet door open.

"Fine! You want me, I'm here, but I'm not going  _anywhere_  with you!" She stepped into her hall and met her uncle's black gaze. It threatened to swallow the ounce of courage she had found but Casey refused to go down that road again. People had fought to get her here. People who thought she mattered. David Dunn had put his job on the line to let her hide until she was eighteen. Barry and Jade had been with her through all of this.

Dennis had lost his job, his security, risked losing his home just so she could be safe in it. She owed it to them to fight.

She owed it to herself to stop being afraid.

'You're nothing but a sick monster who only wants what doesn't fight back."

Hate twisted every feature. Casey stood her ground.

"I came here to be reasonable, girl, but you will pay for talking to me like that. You will show me some respect!"

One foot forward and the door behind him was flung open. Officers flooded in. Her uncle was taken to the ground, forced to break his angry gaze when his face was pressed into the floor as cuffs were clicked into place. There was commotion and harsh sounds as uniforms passed in front of her and her uncle was drug physically away.

A hand on her elbow and Detective Dunn was there, a smile on his usually solemn face.

"You did this on purpose." Casey muttered, and she watched him shake his head a fraction, "Later, Casey. We need to get your statement. He's not getting out of this one."

Casey nodded, understanding, the sooner they had a report the sooner this was over.

The sooner this was  _over._

She let herself be led to the living room. David Dunn stayed close, but not too close. A protective presence that didn't touch, or try to comfort. Casey was grateful. She liked that he was close, even with her uncle hauled away in cuffs, but she didn't think she'd be able to handle it if he did something paternal like try and hug her.

It wasn't as hard this time. They knew the rest of her story, had it written down and filed away. Casey just had to start with the phone call. How Joseph had reacted quickly and got her help. She didn't mention her building suspicion that he had somehow known this was coming. That was for when the notebooks got put away and it was just them.

It took longer than she would have liked before the uniforms cleared and David Dunn was left with his son. Thankfully it was before the others got home. There was no way Casey wanted to get into what had happened.

"I suspected, Casey." David began, broaching the subject before she could even ask, "that your uncle would try something like this. Having the charges not stick made him think he could get away with it. I had Joseph hang around just in case. "

Casey nodded, absorbing it, "but how did he find out where I was? He wasn't supposed to know."

David Dunn regarded her frankly, "I felt it was best if we controlled the window of when this was going to happen."

Casey couldn't speak. It was practically an admittance, that he had told her uncle where to find her. She should be angry, infuriated that he had betrayed her but because of this she was safe. Her uncle was gone and would be forever. They had the proof they needed and he had helped get it. It was the kind of tainted decision that Casey understood, and she nodded her thanks to the man who stood beside his son.

David Dunn clasped his son on the shoulder. "You did good. I'm proud of you." He looked to the girl standing across from them. "For what it's worth. I'm proud of you too."

When Casey began to cry, she was too relieved to be embarrassed. And when Detective David Dunn hugged her, it wasn't weird at all.

* * *

When David Dunn stepped out of the quiet house, he pulled out his phone and sent a text to a number not saved in his phone. A simple two words.

_It's done._

He received two words back in response.

-Thank you.-


	30. Play

* * *

_It was warm. Spring must have come, and almost gone. The leaves had darkened from their translucent shimmer to the dark green of approaching summer. There was a breeze, not cool, but not hot. It felt comfortable against his skin. Like that strange, pleasant back ground you barely noticed._

_He was walking. Grey stone path through a sun lit park. Joggers in the distance, plugged into their headphones, pounding different beats into the earth, adding to the energy of the sunshine._

_He never took walks. Never had the time, or the patience to stroll through nature just to see careless litter on the ground. But everything was neat. clean. blades of glass in even rows. Clouds in an even cycle. He was surrounded by clear space for him to move, to breath._

_He didn't know where he was walking to._

_"Dennis?"_

_He turned at the voice, the sound of his name layered between the sunshine, that soft, hesitant sound he had learned every cadence of._

_She was behind him, cool dark colors layered over her skin, eyes lit with something questioning, seeking. Asking if this was okay._

_The wind shifted and the breeze caught the strands of her hair, drifted them across her lips. Thin pale fingers brushed them away. Her eyes watched his track the movement. Her fingers trembled._

_"Why did you want me to go, Dennis?"_

_The question caught in his chest. He stiffened, "You know I didn't want you to, Casey. But it was for the best."_

_She frowned. "I don't know that at all."_

_The breeze turned cold on his skin._

Dennis jerked awake, tangled with the blanket that had fallen free as he slept. It wasn't dawn yet. No light filtered through the crack in the blinds. He turned his phone towards him with a sigh. The time read 3:09.

He groaned, body falling back against a white pillow, fists dragging across his eyes. He couldn't keep doing this. Barely sleeping just to dream a world that kept him awake. He couldn't keep thinking about her.

But he wondered, what did it really harm? She was free, clear of his reach and his unwanted attention. What he did couldn't affect her. His dreams couldn't touch her.

What would it hurt to dream?

What would it hurt to remember.

But he knew that wasn't pragmatic. He had to focus if he was going to secure his GED and find more work. He had to be disciplined. Ordered. He had to be strong.

But wanting her didn't feel week.

Sometimes it was the only thing that made him feel strong.

He got up, showered in an eerily silent apartment. He had never considered before, the quiet. Jade was away and Barry was still asleep. The steam from his shower clouded the mirror and Dennis selected a cloth and systematically wiped the glass free. Barry always just let it sit, and it would leave rivulets of streaks on the glass. Glass Dennis would have to clean later, when the hours stretched beyond the things he found to fill them. When yet another job posting read 'high school education required."

It was pathetic, a problem a full-grown man should never have to face. Another week and he could take his test. Part of him understood he was ready. He had read through the books and remembered the information. He had never needed help to study.

But she had helped him. Found him a solution when he couldn't afford to buy his own glasses. Spent hours quizzing him on facts he easily remembered. Teased him for it. Smiled when he answered. Sat in the quiet while he read. He had always been self-conscious about reading. Preferred to do it alone, without mocking eyes that would track how long it would take him to get through a page. Casey never did that.

Casey never did a lot of things.

He tossed the wet clothe into the hamper with a sigh. Dressed in the evaporating heat. He stepped into the hall to meet a groggy Barry shuffling out of his room.

"Dennis?" Barry rubbed a hand over scrunched eyes, "what in the fresh prince of hell are you doing awake?"

"You're awake." Dennis countered and Barry pointed an accusing finger at him. " _I'm_ getting a drink, you're..." he waved a hand as if he couldn't be bothered to finish the thought and grumbled his way down the hall. Dennis watched him go.

Then he crossed to his room and let the door shut softly behind him. Stretched out on the bed fully clothed. He settled his arm behind his head, stared at a shadowed ceiling. Ran through facts that might be on his test. Kept his thoughts busy, away. Daylight strengthened and his thoughts began to wander. Light stretched as his eyes closed, and Dennis let himself dream.

* * *

Her uncle stayed in jail. It was a fact she slowly accepted every morning when she woke up. A fact she reminded her self of before she fell asleep. Until slowly she didn't need to anymore.

Joseph moved in, giddy and excited to start his college classes. He wanted to be a police officer, and Casey begrudgingly admitted he'd be good at it. He had a good role model.

David Dunn helped him move in, and he pulled Casey aside.

"So, I know you're still deciding what you want to do, but I wanted to give you this."

He handed her an envelope with her name printed on the front.

"I signed you up for a scholarship program, Casey, and you were awarded one. It's enough for a few semesters if you want to take some classes while you figure it out."

Casey held the envelope, mute with shock. At his raised brow she fumbled for a response, "I, well, thank you, but. How?"

"You don't have to use it. I won't be offended. We just thought you deserved the option."

"We?" Casey asked, and watched his blink, "uh, it's through the police force. We nominate deserving kids."

Joseph called for his dad's attention, and Casey nodded as he stepped away, holding the paper in stunned confusion.

Taking classes hadn't been an option before. She hadn't found a job yet and she couldn't afford to go but now, with a scholarship? Maybe she could. Maybe she should. Isn't that what people her age did? Went to school? Figured out what they wanted to do with their life. The thought of Dennis squinting over a GED study book filled her mind. She had been given the opportunity at an education. She shouldn't waste it. Not everyone got one.

* * *

She started classes in a few weeks. Claire helped her pick her courses. She was surprisingly knowledgeable about most of the good and worst professors and Casey took note. They had paid more attention to her once Barry started coming around, and had begun to become friends almost on accident. She still didn't go out with them, but they were sincere now in asking.

She managed to find a job at the school library. She texted Barry to let him know.

-congratulations im sure youll love it-

-oh I almost forgot-

-he did it!-

A picture came through and Casey stilled. Barry was standing with thumbs up in front of a diploma, a goofy grin on his face. Dennis was in the background of the photo. He didn't even look pleased, but there was a proudness to his stance.

He had done it, gotten his GED.

Casey was caught in a flood of unexpected emotions. She was happy for him, stupidly proud even. But she wanted to be there. To congratulate him. Hug him. See his eyes warm with that teasing light that came out every so often.

She wanted to see him.

She sent Barry back a quick text.  _tell him I said congrats. thats so cool._  It sounded so stupid but she didn't know what else to say.

she knew what she wanted to say.

_tell him I miss him._

Casey put her phone away without reading Barry's reply

* * *

Dennis stood at the rusted gate, tempted to once again check his watch. It was 7:28 and the gate wasn't open. His shift was supposed to start at 7:30. He couldn't be late for his first shift but there was nothing he could do about that if they didn't let him in.

He shifted, feeling the cold air move through his button up. It would be warm enough later he wouldn't need a jacket. He ignored wishing he had brought on now.

Sometimes he liked the cold. It was brisk, harsh, but clean at least.

There were footsteps behind him and Dennis turned.

"Good morning!" a man grinned at him from a few steps behind, a slight twang in his voice. "You must be Dennis. I'm Luke"

He extended a hand that Dennis shook, nodding to the man in response.

"Yeah, Jade mentioned you might not talk much." He laughed easily, motioning for Dennis to follow him in. Dennis didn't correct him, knowing full well Jade had probably warned the man about his peculiar habits. He didn't mind. Made it easier than dealing with small talk. He had never really expected to even meet the man Jade was spending so much time with, she never introduced her male friends before. But Jade had mentioned Dennis was looking for a job and Luke had said the zoo had an opening. He was the on-call veterinarian and had mentioned they needed a maintenance man.

Dennis had never considered working around animals before, but dealing with them was not part of the job description and he was not in a position to turn down work. Barry's face had been interesting when he told him. Brow high he had just nodded, mouth intentionally shut. Like he was trying not to laugh. Dennis didn't mind that either.

Luke took him through, showing him around before turning him over to the head of maintenance. She was a small, no nonsense woman named Margaret who didn't try to talk if she didn't have to and Dennis felt a surprising amount of relief. Luke was nice but he talked a lot.

He changed into the nondescript green jumpsuit and worked mostly on his own, cleaning and sweeping up general areas. Not many people came through while he worked but they left enough trash behind to keep him busy. There was something he could almost enjoy about it, straightening what they left behind. He couldn't look too closely at the corners but he kept up with keeping it clean.

An hour before his shift ended, Luke found him. There were students from the university coming in to volunteer and intern, and he needed help clearing out some equipment from the room they would be using.

Luke talked, but he worked hard and Dennis gained a degree of respect for the man. Heat built as they moved the heavy equipment and Luke shrugged out of his flannel, tossing it unconcerned over a dusty chair. Dennis ignored the heat, earning a funny look but he didn't care. The jumpsuit they provided kept him clean. It wouldn't do that if he took it off.

They had just finished when the handful of students arrived. Dennis stepped back, intending to exit once they cleared the doorway. They chattered and barely glanced his way. A maintenance uniform was good for that.

He stepped out when he thought it was clear just to stop short to avoid running into to something.

She looked up, eyes flashing with surprise, and she laughed, brilliant smile flashing. "Gosh, I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention."

Her hair was dark and wavy and she ran a hand through it, Dennis just nodded and stepped aside, intent on letting her pass but she didn't move.

"Do you work here?" her finger still twirled in her hair and for some reason it reminded Dennis of how annoying Barry was when he chewed gum. He cleared his throat, frowning and looking away.

"Yes, I do."

"What's your name?" Her smile turned sharper.

He sighed. "Dennis."

"Oh, well then maybe we'll see more of each other, Dennis," she offered, not at all deterred by the man's stoic expression. There was something edgy and attractive about it. She liked the mysterious type.

"I'm Marcia."

* * *

When Jade visited Casey surprised everyone by asking them to tag along when they went out. Claire and Marcia were the only ones who could go. They  _loved_  Jade, and Jade loved showing them pictures of Luke. She talked about thinking about moving in with him. They didn't talk about what Casey wanted to ask most of all.

Until they stopped in the food court of the mall, and Claire and Marcia headed to grab a drink, then Casey managed to broach the subject.

"Oh, so I heard Dennis got his diploma." It was forced, too rushed and Casey hid a blush, turned her eyes from Jade so she wouldn't see her studying her.

"Yeah, he did. Barry was more excited than he was, but, hey. He found a job. Yeah, at a zoo of all places. He's working nonstop, Barry says he hardly sees him."

Casey was just nodding, trying not to show too much, ask too much. "So that's good." More nodding. "I'm glad."

Jade suddenly leaned forward, "Case, look there's-"

"Omg." Claire dropped her bag on the table, causing Jade to start back in surprise, "Marcia just told me the craziest thing." She didn't wait for them to respond before launching into her story about a guy Marcia had met and how she knew Luke from the zoo.

Casey couldn't focus, wondering what on earth Jade had been about to say. But judging by the way Jade was now avoiding her eye, she was apparently thankful for the interruption. They left a while later and Casey never did get the chance to ask what that had been about.

Jade tried not to feel guilty about not telling Casey the truth. That it may or may not have been her fault Dennis had pushed Casey away. Part of her saw the look in Casey's eye and wanted to tell her, to explain. The other part of her saw how great Casey was doing here. She was quiet, yeah, but she didn't look like she was afraid to speak anymore. This had been good for her. She was getting that normal life Jade had had wanted for her. College and roommates and girl time out and about. Casey needed this. But no matter how much Jade tried to convince herself, she couldn't shake the feeling that as much as Casey needed to find her own strength and be her own person, that maybe Casey needed him too.

* * *

"You know, you like really boring movies." Barry went for another cookie from the box and propped his feet up on the coffee table, ignoring the look Casey sent him.

"What, it's true. I'd rather watch Land Before Time then, what is this again," he held up the case and squinted at it in the dim light, "Band of Brothers, like really?"

Casey elbowed him in the stomach, and took the movie back. "Orwell lent it to me. I think it's interesting." She wasn't usually in to war movies, but this miniseries about world war two had caught her attention. She was making Barry watch an episode every time he came over.

He had threatened to stop coming over twice now. But he always came back and plopped down beside her as if waiting for the torture to begin.

"You're almost as bad as Dennis. He watches the stupidest things sometimes."

He glanced over at Casey, expecting her to laugh. But she had her head cocked to the side, a soft, almost sad expression on her face.

She was remembering shared darkness while infomercials played. What was on tv didn't have to be interesting, it was just quiet. Relaxed. She blinked twice and glanced Barry's way.

"Keep this up and I'll make you watch two episodes." She held up the remote as a threat, and Barry shook his head adamantly.

"No, no, I'll behave," he settled back and tugged her down beside him, not at all caring what it would look like if the others walked through and spotted them on the couch, sharing a blanket as they watched. It was the kind of closeness Barry pulled out of her without thought. The kind she was too comfortable to notice until after the fact.

"Just push play so I can fall asleep already."

Casey smacked him. Then letting her head fall back against the couch, she aimed the remote at the television and hit play.


	31. Weeks

"Like oh my word, this guy, Claire. He's just so... you ever met someone that were just like a magnet, to everything? He's got these steely eyes, and this voice like blind angels talking…"

Casey leaned over to Joseph, "Did that make any sense to you?" she whispered, and he shrugged.

"No, but she once described her ex as 'like Donald Duck… but cute.'"

Casey's face made her feelings about that statement a little too obvious and Marcia saw it.

"Look, just because your man's fine doesn't mean you can't respect that mine is a piece."

"My man?" Casey asked, surprised, but Joseph spoke over top of her.

"A piece of what?" Joseph asked, genuinely confused.

But Claire drew Marcia's attention. "oh, so he's your  _man_  now is he. He finally asked you out?"

"Well, no," Marcia flipped her hair, "But I'm hoping he'll invite me to this fundraiser the zoo's gonna have. Yeah it's like a night walk through the zoo or something. You guys should come. We get to dress up!" she said it like it was a selling point and Joseph and Casey just looked at her. "Anyway. I'm telling you, he's just," she sighed, "Seriously guys," she flopped on the couch, expression starry, "there's just something about him. He's got this cold exterior that I'd love to get beneath."

"Yeah like that's the only thing you wouldn't love to get beneath." Claire threw back at her, and Casey choked on her water.

"Aw, look, you've embarrassed Casey." Marcia waved a hand at her, half in apology, half to get the attention off of herself.

Claire bumped Casey's hip as she walked by, "Sorry girl. We can't all be as innocent as you."

Casey's flush paled into something cold. Joseph was the only one who noticed. "Hey, it was just a joke."

He said it kindly, touched her arm just to have her jerk away. It was a flash on instinct and Joseph's eyes softened in understanding. It didn't happen often, but it still happened. Those times when the past got ripped to the surface and for half a second Casey just froze.

Joe always noticed. Sometimes she hated that he knew about her. That she wasn't truly innocent.

But he never brought it out, never made her uncomfortable about it. In fact, he always found some inane way to smooth things over, to step in and just let her be.

He plopped next to Marcia on the couch and asked more about this guy. He pulled in Claire's attention when she came back in the room. He let Casey stay mangled in the background until she got a hold of herself, and she could quietly leave the room.

* * *

Dennis sighed. He had worked here for two weeks and found the job itself to be manageable. He was not the only maintenance man and they spaced them through the zoo well enough that he could keep his areas clean. It was good work and it paid well. He would be enjoying it.

Except he didn't know what to do about the others.

Marcia spoke to him almost every time she came in. She found him at least one point during his shift and always spent a few minutes chatting with him. She was always nice, always friendly, but Dennis never had anything to say to her. It was obvious she was intelligent, Luke had mentioned she was by far the best volunteer, but Dennis couldn't help looking at her and seeing something empty.

Like her eyes were too bright for the light not to be false, like the gloss of her smile or the hair she incessantly toyed with. She was a nice girl, he just wished she talked to him less.

She was an interruption. Not pleasant enough to be a distraction. And he didn't want to deal with it. He just wanted to work in silence and go home.

Luke caught him when he headed to take his break.

"I was surprised Marcia wasn't in today," he said as he strolled by Dennis, and the larger man shrugged.

"Was she meant to be?" He'd been making an effort lately to respond when Luke talked. He thought Jade might appreciate it.

"Yeah, the others came in. I thought maybe you might know why she wasn't in."

Dennis looked at Luke, voice sharper than intended. "Why would I know that."

Luke chuckled a little at the ice in his tone. "Hey, relax man, just knew she was friendly with you. I thought maybe you were going out."

Dennis just stared at him, expression set in a displeased surprised that reminded Luke a bit of a stern librarian and he chuckled to himself.

"Look, I know you're private and all about your life, but I think she likes you. Maybe you should ask her out."

Dennis didn't respond. Didn't blink, didn't move and Luke scratched his neck a little awkwardly, "Yeah, so I'm gonna let ya take your break. Just, uh, think about it Dennis. She's real nice."

Dennis turned away. Yes, Marcia was nice but what did it matter. He doubted her interest in him, and even if Luke was right, he didn't want it.

He didn't want that.

End of shift and he clocked out, and readied to walk home. He stepped out of his jumpsuit and hung it carefully in his service locker. He stopped by the office for his pay, pulled out his phone while he was thinking about it and sent a quick text.

-I can drop payment off tomorrow.-

His phone buzzed halfway home.

_That works. Thanks._

He pocketed his phone without responding.

Barry surprised him by being home when he got there. Barry spent most of his time at school or out. He was still trying for that contest thing at school and it required a lot of extra work.

He looked up when Dennis came in, waving a hello, attention on his phone as he finished a call,

"Yeah, yeah I'm coming alright. Goodness girl, you act like you miss me or something."

He laughed and hung up, a cocky grin on his face that Dennis raised a brow at. Despite being overtly out going, Barry wasn't usually smug about how likeable he was. Not unless he was trying to impress someone.

"Who was that?" Dennis found himself asking, and Barry glanced at him, surprised by his curiosity.

"Oh, it was Case."

He dropped his phone in his messenger bag, not seeing the way Dennis stopped, the way his hands tightened til white shown.

"Casey?" He repeated, voice quiet to hide the strain.

"Yeah, I'm seeing her tonight." Barry was digging through his bag, oblivious to the pale lines filling Dennis's expression. Since when did Barry talk to  _Casey_  like that?

Like she was laughing on the other end of the line, smiling at the way Barry talked to her.

He knew Barry had kept in touch but Barry being gone a lot suddenly made a lot more sense. He was with Casey.

"You know," Barry set his bag down and looked at Dennis, "I have been wondering something. Why don't you ever ask about her. Like," he shrugged, hands out like he was looking for something, "She was your friend too and now you don't care how she's doing?"

It had been at the back of his mind for a while now, how Casey was somehow just completely absent from Dennis's life now. He had always believed his brother was an out of sight, out of mind person, but the box Dennis had finally showed him seemed to deny that.

He had come to realize Dennis cared a lot more than he seemed to. Even for Hedwig, and Jade. Shouldn't that have extended to Casey?

"I know you guys didn't always get along, but it's just weird you never talk about her."

Barry was talking without really looking for a response. He sighed suddenly, shrugging, "Then again, she never talks about you either, so maybe you just weren't friends after all."

He said it casually, an idle thought with no malicious intent. He gathered his things and ducked into the kitchen to make coffee.

Dennis stood.

For a long time, Dennis just stood.

_She never talks about you either_

Of course she didn't. He should have known she wouldn't. He had broken off whatever thing had been between them. Whatever friendship or whatever else had been severed when he walked away. It's what he had wanted. It had been his intention all along. He had wanted her to live her life free of him. He had never expected he would grow to be free of her. That was something he bore. Something he dealt with in the shadowed silence when others couldn't see.

Casey had moved on.

It was what they had wanted. It was what they had  _all_  wanted.

Then why did it feel like something inside was fracturing. Why did it feel like darkness was being let in.

* * *

"Hey, Case, what are you up to this weekend?" Joseph was leaning against the counter as Casey ate her dinner, and she shrugged around a bite of spaghetti.

Claire popped in while Casey chewed and gasped dramatically, "Joseph, are you asking Casey out?" She giggled, grabbing her iced tea from the fridge as Joseph colored a little.

"Of course not, she's dating Barry."

Casey choked on her dinner.

"My dad was just-" Joseph broke off and looked at Casey's coughing in concern, "You alright?"

He filled a glass with water and handed to her, watching her eyes tear up a little from coughing,

"You went to talk and swallow at the same time didn't you." He smiled sympathetically while Casey gulped down the water.

She stood, finally about to breath. "d-dating Barry?" she gasped out, still not over the shock.

"Well duh," Claire was shaking her iced tea bottle idly, "I was just messing with Joe. You and Barry are so obvious."

"But, we're not." Casey's protest was cut off by another cough and she watched them roll their eyes good naturedly.

"Yeah, okay." Claire shook her head and left the room. Joe just a second behind.

"Let me know when you're done almost dying and well talk." He called

Casey was left in a kitchen empty of anyone to refute what they had said. She and Barry? Why would they say that? That, that wasn't.

The front door opened and the object of her horror came strolling through.

"Case!" he called out, grin dimming when he saw her, "Why so flushed," he caught her waist and turned her to face the light, hand cupping her cheek to inspect her eyes, "You aren't sick are you?" his hand felt her forehead., traced her cheeks that Casey could feel were suddenly burning.

Claire walked by and glanced in, seeing them there. The knowing look she sent Casey had her ears ringing.

"What's wrong, Babydoll?" Barry was watching her, truly concerned now. Casey didn't know what to say. She wanted to be mad at him for touching her, for being concerned but how could she with how sweet he was. How caring.

"Can I talk to you?" she finally managed. Her hands took his and lowered them, eyes switching between the concern in his own. "Somewhere else?" she added, mindful of the roommates just in the other room.

"Yeah, of course, doll. Whatever you want."

* * *

The pieces wouldn't fit. Dennis squinted in frustration, a hand passing over his eye. The figurine was not coming together the way it was supposed to. Eyes strained he reached for his glasses. With a sharp sigh he dropped the pieces he building onto the desk, letting them scatter.

He sat back in his chair, shoulders broad but heavy.

It was too quiet. To stale in here. To empty.

He stood to pace. Heard the outer door and moved to the hall, wondering why Barry was back so soon.

"Dennis?"

The voice floating down the hall wasn't Barry's, and Dennis frowned. They hadn't been expecting Jade for another few days.

He found her talking to Luke in the living room, the couple standing close together. Jade was laughing at something he had said. Her smile was softer than Dennis was expecting and he paused a moment, not wanting to interrupt. But part of him was wondering why he had to worry about interrupting people in his own home.

Jade glanced up and caught his frown.

"Hey! Sorry to barge in like this. We were in the neighborhood and Barry wasn't answering his phone."

She smiled and came forward, almost like she was going to hug him before suddenly waving her hands like she had just realized what she was doing. Dennis cocked a brow at her.

"We weren't expecting you."

"Yeah, had some flights get canceled so I'm home early. Where's Barry at?"

She looked around even though it was fairly obvious he wasn't home.

"With Casey."

Luke was standing in the back, quietly waiting. He didn't catch the edge to Dennis's voice, didn't know it well enough to hear it but he caught Jade's reaction. She stilled a little too casually, like she did when she was processing something that had surprised her but she didn't want to make a scene about it.

Because to her, Dennis's tone had said much more than his words.

"Oh, well. You mind if we hang around til he gets back? Luke wanted to hang out with him. Oh and he wanted to ask you something too."

Dennis's gaze moved to the man, and Luke grinned.

"Guess that's my cue. I was just wonderin, you know that fundraiser coming up at work?"

Dennis nodded once, he had heard of it.

"Well are ya planning on going? I didn't know it maybe you and Marcia were gonna go…?"

Jade did it again. She tried to pretend she wasn't paying attention but she was dying to know what Luke was talking about. He could see her staring at him now at the corner of his eye.

"I wasn't going." Dennis answered, suddenly feeling exhausted. He kept himself straight and waited for Luke to respond. Kept his eyes focused forward and his expression blank.

"Oh," Luke stuffed his hands in his pockets, looking almost sheepish, "I'm actually mighty glad you don't want to attend the fundraiser, because I was actually hoping you would want to work that night." He shrugged, "It's a fun night but kids tend to get into mischief. We're asking a few guys to work security. You wouldn't have to do much. Just keep an eye on any off-limit areas to make sure everyone stays where they're supposed to. You'd get a pay increase too, for the night."

"It seemed like a good gig for you," Jade came up beside Luke, casually leaning against his side. "What do you say. Interested?"

Dennis nodded. "I suppose."

Luke grinned, looking relieved, "That's great. It's been hard finding people. It'd be a huge help."

H grinned as Dennis excused himself, feeling Jade's hand tighten on his arm until Dennis was out of view, then she turned on him with a vengeance.

"Who the flip is Marcia?"

* * *

Barry followed Casey willingly, let her lead him into the evening light with warmth still clinging. They walked to a park, stopped at a railing beside the water. It would get cold fast as the shadows fell, and she wished suddenly she had brought a jacket.

"Barry," she reached out, stopping him, forcing herself just to tell him. "The others, they think we're dating."

"Well…" Barry just gaped at her… "aren't we?"


	32. Voice

Barry watched the color drain from Casey's face, just to flood back in a brilliant stain of red aginsti her cheeks. Her eyes flashed with something akin to panic and almost anger, and his hands settled on her shoulder.

"Woah, calm down, doll. I was just joking."

She blinked at him, confusion replacing the panic, the anger not as quick to recede.

"That's not funny, Barry." She bit out, and Barry had the sense to look bashful.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart. I didn't realize you were upset about this."

He didn't know  _why_  she was upset about this. "I mean, I am over a lot. It's not crazy that they just assumed…"

He shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, and Casey gulped in a breath, telling herself to calm down before she felt stupid for overreacting.

But she didn't want to calm down. She wanted to be  _mad_  about this.

"But Barry. We  _aren't dating._ "

He smiled like she had said something that was softly amusing.

"No, but…" the hand on her shoulders moved with his sigh. "Maybe we could be?"

He sounded almost shy.

Casey stepped back in shock.

"Barry," her heart started to race in something that felt like she needed to escape, "Is that, is that actually what you want?"

"I don't know, Case," He threw his hands up and turned away like this wasn't insane, "I didn't really think about it before, when you were living with us. But I like you, Casey, a lot, and I know you like me. Would it be so nuts if we did date?"

It was like he was discussing this, like it was simple. Like her ears didn't feel like they were going to explode.

"Of course I like you Barry, I just, I didn't…"

She felt like she was going to cry.

And that  _infuriated_  her.

"Woah, hey I'm sorry, doll." He read her face and came forward, gathered her against him and wrapped her in a bear hug. "It's okay. I don't know what I was thinking."

Casey wondered if it was wrong to cling to him, to draw strength from him even as the thought of  _being_  with him terrified her.

"I do care about you, Barry," she said, pushing back, "you mean so much to me."

"… I just don't mean  _that_  to you. I know. It's okay." He cupped her face in his hands, settled her gaze with his own and Casey felt herself calming. "Honestly I'm not sure if you mean  _that_  to me either. I could see what it looked like when we were together, Case, and I liked it, but I guess I got caught up in it. I just know I love you, babygirl. You bring up a light inside me that makes me happy."

He was earnest with sincerity, and Casey let herself breath.

"You make me happy too." She answered, "sometimes," she added, cutting off his cocky smile, and he groaned.

"You know, it's funny you brought this whole thing up, because I actually came over to sort of ask you out. Not on a date!" he added, hands up at her expression, "Just Jade told me about something the zoo is doing that she wants me to go to, and I thought maybe you would want to come with?"

"I mean… I guess?" Casey answered, not knowing what to say, and Barry laughed.

"You don't have to sound so excited. It's Friday night. And it will be fun. I promise."

He left awhile later, leaving Casey reeling. She stood with hands gripping the rough wooden rail, eyes fixed on the dark water of the river. Her fingers grew cold and she hugged them to herself, fists clenched tight beneath her arms.

What was  _that?_  She had never thought, never considered that Barry would have a single thought anywhere in that direction. She wanted to blame the others, for putting thoughts in his head about what their friendship looked like. But if she was honest, she knew if she was an outsider looking in she would think the same thing.

Still it was  _Barry._ Entirely lovable but the man could not keep his hands to himself. He had zero boundaries and touched everything, but it was just something that made him so… comfortable. He was invasive to the point it was like he just belonged. She wondered if she should feel guilty. If she had led him on. The thought twisted something sick inside of her.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she pulled it out. It was a text from Barry and she closed her eyes a moment before opening it.  _Please don't let him hate me_  she thought.

-hey! Sorry to be such a duntz but im actually glad we talked-

-I got a little too stuck in my own head and nobody needs that-

-I don't know what I was thinking-

-be honest how stupid did I sound-

Casey shook her head at the onslaught of texts

_You didn't sound stupid, Barry._

-liar-

-chances of us forgetting this happened?-

The next text was a gif of a puppy saying please. Casey couldn't help it, she smiled. Barry wasn't mad.

_I promise to only bring it up if you annoy me_

-great then ill never hear the end of it-

-JUST DON'T TELL JADE-

Casey laughed out loud

_I guess I can promise that one._

She put her phone away feeling lighter. She watched the water and let herself relax, until the cold chased her back home.

* * *

Marcia pretended she wasn't watching the clock. Luke was running through a procedure she could do with her eyes closed, and she was trying so hard to pretend to pay attention. She loved animals and was so excited she had made it into this program but she was fairly certain Dennis's shift ended soon and she really wanted to catch him before he left. The fundraiser was this Friday and she hadn't had the chance to give him the chance to ask her.

_Finally_  Luke finished up and she was the first one to the door. She sped walk through the pale halls out towards the open section of the zoo. There were a couple fieldtrips there that day and she figured Dennis would be busy.

He certainly knew how to work hard, that was for sure.

She spotted him across the courtyard with the picnic tables and small gazebos. It was warm enough to be pleasant but cool enough not to be hot, and Marcia shrugged out of her sweater. It never hurt to show a little skin.

He was fixing the lock on a small gate near the tiger exhibit, attention devoted to the task. His green uniform pulled across his shoulders as he worked, eyes fixed on the tools in his hands. He had a precise way of moving that felt a little but like raw power and Marcia really tried not to stare.

Or atleast pretended she tried not to.

She was almost to him when she noticed a couple of school kids watching him from a nearby table. They were young, maybe in second grade, and they were whispering back and forth when the largest boy seemed to get up the nerve to ask Dennis something.

"Um, excuse me mister, but do you have to fix that so the tigers don't get out?"

Marcia stifled a giggle, the boy looked so serious, so concerned and she watched Dennis pause and glance to the boy, as if verifying he had actually been speaking to Dennis.

"The tigers don't use this gate."

He answered it so seriously and Marcia watched the boy nod almost solemnly. He kept staring right at Dennis and she watched the man's expression. He didn't smile at the kid, but he didn't look put out by it either.

"Why don't they?"

"A tiger could jump over this gate. They jump up to twelve feet. That's why their cages are so high."

The boy's eyes widened in disbelief, he went to answer when a whistle sounded through the courtyard, and he and the other students jumped.

"Oh, gotta go mister. Take care of those tigers for me!"

The boy ran off behind his friends and Dennis turned back to his work. He glanced up when he spotted Marcia's shadow beside his as she approached.

"Hey, Dennis."

He collected his tools and straightened, and Marcia had to tilt her head a little to meet his eye. He was so much taller than her.

"Good afternoon."

"that kid was pretty funny," Marcia chuckled, and Dennis just shrugged a little.

"Yeah he was."

Marcia fell into step with him and Dennis reluctantly tried to think of something to say. He spotted a poster by the giftshop and glanced at marcia.

"the fundraiser is this Friday."

Marcia brightened, "Yeah, I guess it is. Where you going?"

Dennis nodded once. After a second he added.

"Were you going?"

Marcia shrugged, her finger catching her hair, "Well. I don't know. I was thinking about it I guess."

She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, an odd smile on her face. Dennis hid a sigh. He wasn't in the mood for small talk.

"You should come…" what to say next… "I'm sure it will be fun."

He wasn't sure of anything of the kind, but Marcia suddenly looked rather excited.

"Yeah that sounds great."

She touched his arm before saying goodbye and Dennis frowned after her. Luke seemed to think Marcia liked him. Dennis didn't think Marcia was being anything other than friendly.

Still he could do with a little less friendly.

He supposed he wasn't exactly being fair. Marcia was kind enough to talk to him when everyone else ignored him. It wasn't her fault that being ignored was what Dennis wanted. He couldn't fault her for being friendly. He was even trying to be friendly back. He just wished this wasn't all so hard.

He wished talking to people was easier.

But that wasn't entirely it.

He missed having someone who was easy to talk to.

* * *

Joseph hung up the phone, sticking his head into the living room to holler at Casey. "hey tell Barry thanks when you see him. He just got me a job for the night at that thing you're going to at the zoo."

Casey looked up from where she was studying with Orwell.

"Oh really, doing what?'

"Security," Joseph said it like it was cool before dropping onto the couch, "sounds more like being a hall monitor but it will look good on extracurriculars."

He flipped the tv on and let Casey get back to her history lesson, turning the volume up just to the point that he couldn't hear what Orwell was saying anymore and kicked his feet up on the coffee table. An hour later they were still studying and Joseph was asleep on the couch.

Marcia barged in and startled him awake.

"Where's Claire," Marcia stared them down like they were hiding her and Joseph sputtered.

"how should we know?"

"He asked me!" Marcia squealed, ignoring Joseph and Orwell, she grabbed Casey's arm and bounced in place. "He's going to the fundraiser and said I should go too! You're coming right? Barry said you were going. Omg you'll get to meet him! I have to decide what to wear. Why isn't Claire home yet? She is never here when I need her!" Marcia took off down the hall, thumbs tapping out a text furiously, leaving Casey blinking at Orwell.

"As I was saying," he cleared his throat, "the industrial area was the start of.."

Joseph groaned and dropped a pillow over his face. He hated history.

* * *

Casey left work Friday afternoon and headed across campus. People milled past her in conversation, arms tucked around books and bags tossed over shoulders. It was a little bit funny how you could look at any of them and just think 'college.' They all shared that overworked and underslept but still going to be up until 2am 'studying' look that was hard to put a finger on but pretty easy to recognize. Idly Casey wondered if she should be more stressed out. But even with work and her classes she felt freer than she had in a long time. In so many tiny and insignificant ways, life was  _good._

She could do whatever she wanted with it.

And right now she wanted to get home and shower before tonight. No one had actually explained what the fundraiser was other than the zoo would be open at night. It sounded like it might be cool and Barry was actually pretty excited about going. Apparently, Jade had been wanting him and Luke to get to know each other better and this seemed a way to do that. Casey just hoped it wouldn't be crowded.

She had to wait for Marcia to finish in the shower before she could get ready and she showered quickly, not wanting to make Barry late.

She pulled on her leggings and a baggy sweatshirt, comfortable and warm enough for when it got cold. She met Marcia coming out of her room she shared with Claire and came to surprised halt.

"Hey Case! Claire's not here to ask, what do you think? They said to dress up zoo themed so…" she twirled in place.

She was wearing a tiny black top and leopard tights. Her hair was pulled up and she had a cat ears head band in place.

"Oh, it's um, won't you get cold?" It was the only thing Casey could think to say. Marcia looked great, she always looked great but Casey couldn't even fathom wearing something like in public. She felt exposed just looking at it.

Marcia waved a hand, "It's worth it. What are you gonna wear?"

Casey looked down at her outfit in response and Marcia rolled her eyes, "oh, you can not be wearing that."

She grabbed Casey's hand and pulled her into her room.

"Here," she started digging through her closet, "I know I have something that will, oh, here we go."

She pulled out a black dress. It looked tight. And short. Casey swallowed.

"Actually I think I'm okay."

"oh come onnn. You can wear it over the tights you have on. It would look so cute on you."

Marcia held it out, bouncing on the pads of her feet like she was too excited for Casey to say no.

"I guess I'll try it."

She accepted the dress with every intention of trying it on and claiming it didn't fit. But Marcia hardly gave her enough privacy to change. She popped back in when Casey had pulled the dress on and actually squealed.

"Gosh that dress has never looked that good on me. Let's go, Barry just got here."

She grabbed Casey's hand and pulled her out, leaving Casey to stare longingly over her shoulder at her sweatshirt left discarded on the bed.

Claire and Barry both met them at the door and Marcia linked arms with Claire. Claire was in a zebra striped dress and a long black sweater. Her four inch heels made Casey nervous just looking at her but at least she wouldn't be cold.

"Casey, you look, dang girlll," Barry stopped to gush but Marcia prodded him on.

"Yes, yes, Casey looks great, now let's go. I don't want to be late."

"You're just excited to see maintenance man," Claire scoff and Marcia rolled her eyes.

"Same difference."

They shared a cab to the zoo, Claire refusing to walk there in those shoes. It was cramped in the backseat and Casey held onto Barry's arm a little tighter than necessary.

She wasn't comfortable. They dress had sleeves that were sheer and long and left just enough material at the end for Casey's fingers to get tangled in. It hugged tight against her. It was stretchy but it felt far more constricting than it actually was. She told herself it was the dress's fault she couldn't breathe.

They stepped out of the cab and Casey's eyes widened. She hadn't been to the zoo in years. She barely remembered coming here as a child on a class trip. But nothing here matched her memory.

Lights had been strung across the entrance, a glittering expanse that looked almost surreal. People were everywhere. Kids in animal costumes and tiger footy pajamas ran around with their parents just behind. A group of teenage girls walked past with face painted whiskers and cat eyes. Casey had no idea it was going to be this busy.

Marcia grabbed a flyer and held it under a lamppost.

"Ooo there's a souvenir hunt that's about to start. You guys wanna go?"

Barry was all for it, and Casey nodded. "Sure. Sounds fun."

They joined the others teams and Casey watched the lights as they outlined the rules, were told to keep to the lit path and stay out of the closed sections of the zoo.

"Alright, we'll split up. Marcia and I will take the safari side, you guys start towards the aviary," Claire handed her and Barry a list of what they were looking for and Barry mock saluted.

Marcia and Claire took off, and Casey waved Barry on, spotting a water fountain in the corner.

"You go, I'm gonna get a drink and catch up."

He grinned liked a little boy and sprinted away.

Casey took a long breath. The courtyard had cleared out, everyone hurrying to start the game. Casey walked through the shadows alone. She thought it would be eerie, walking through the zoo at night. Many of the animals slept, but paths had been highlighted to the nocturnal animals that would be up and pacing. Casey wandered the guided trail, hearing shouts and calls in the distance. She couldn't imagine all the noise was good for the animals trying to sleep, but she had imagined they had thought about that.

She just knew she wouldn't want to have to deal with cranky wild animals in the morning.

She was nearing a bridge when a crowd of people came pouring over it, arguing over where to look next. She side stepped quickly, down an unlit trail, not wanting to be in the way. The path was small and led past the reptile house. Dimly she wondered where Barry had gotten to, but she figured he was capable of reading a list on his own. Casey was enjoying the quiet.

There was less lights here, less sound. She passed a little window into the reptile room, the lights off and its inhabitants undisturbed. She wondered what it would be like, to live your life behind glass. Looked on and prodded, studied but never really understood. Creatures that had spent their lives in cages. If she opened the doors, would they even walk out?

She knew zoos adopted animals that couldn't survive in the wild, that provided homes and care and brought wonder to those that came to visit. They were a safe place for the damaged lives, humans caring for the broken. Ironic considering it was humans that usually broke them. Unwanted exotic pets, animals driven to the verge of instinct by human progress. Maybe these people should have stepped in for these animals a long time ago, before they ever needed to come here.

But she knew that wasn't really fair. There would always be the broken. Sometimes they needed an in between place, to heal, no longer captive, but not too free. Kept but not wholly contained. Security with the illusion of freedom. The illusion of self sufficiency.

She wondered if that's all she had been given. If she was still in that in-between.

Did that make her weak? Was it weak to be cared for?

She had wandered further than she had thought, stopped in a place where the shadows had taken over. She turned to go back.

A voice came suddenly from the dark,

"Excuse me, but you're not allowed back here."

Casey turned sharply, facing the silhouette, her thoughts froze in stinging disbelief.

She knew that voice.

"…Dennis?"


	33. Light

Dennis walked the east end of the zoo, bordering the open sections. People milled under the lights and he walked the edge of the shadows. Making sure no one got lost or into the where they shouldn't be. There were children out and running, parents strolling behind. He was more concerned about accidental mischief than anything.

It was a nice night, clear and fresh enough to enjoy walking in. He was enough in the background to hear the hum of conversation and not catch the actual words. It was pleasant.

He made a lap by the green houses, taking the small path toward the aviary. He didn't use his light, wasn't really expecting to need it until he spotted a figure walking.

They didn't seem to be doing much beside walking calmly, and Dennis figured they had gotten lost more than were looking to cause trouble.

"Excuse me, but you're not allowed back here."

There was the sound of turning and a sharp, indrawn breath. He had startled them.

Then a voice reached him.

"Dennis?"

It was soft, and a little shaken, certain but surprised. Dennis faltered. Lips moved with vacant words.

"Casey?" he managed.

It was not the first time he had spoken her name into the darkness.

But this time she was there to meet it. Nothing more than a slight silhouette against a dark path. The night air turned chilled and blew against them. It was all that moved between them.

Casey shook herself. "What are you doing here?"

She came towards him then, towards his shadow and Dennis felt his chest expand.

"I work here."

Casey's brain dropped what it was looking for. He worked  _here?_

"But Luke works here." She said confused. Jade had mentioned Dennis worked at a zoo or something but she figured she would have mentioned if it was the same place her boyfriend worked!

"Yes I know. He got me the job."

Casey mentally scowled at Jade. What a thing to just leave out.

"So what do you do here?"

She was near enough she could see the vague outline of his face and her eyes strained to study it, to see it despite the layers of shadow between.

"Maintenance usually. Tonight I'm on security."

What Dennis had first said to her suddenly clicked and Casey jumped a little, "Oh! I'm really not supposed to be back here, am I?"

It broke that fragile, awkward ice. She heard Dennis's half chuckle, wished she could see it, the slight smile, the warmed eyes.

"No. you're not."

Casey flushed, cheeks hid in the dark. "guess I should go back then."

She didn't move. Dennis shifted, for a moment pressing closer, the air warmed.

"I'll take you back."

He went to fall into step beside her, to walk the darkened trail side beside. For a moment Casey was tempted to remain, shrouded in dark but she made herself turn.

"So do you like it?" She peeked up at him and saw him shrug.

"Usually, yes."

"Are they kind to you?" Asked so softly but with so much care, and Dennis stopped.

He stopped walking and felt the darkness swell with something that threatened fill him.

He hadn't seen her. For days, weeks, almost months but now mere casual conversation had him remembering how warm she was. Her presence extended something soft that just felt like simple comfort. Barry, Jade, Luke, all of them had asked him whether he liked his job. None of them knew to ask how his coworkers were treating him.

"I mostly work alone. The rest are friendly. I think knowing Luke helps."

He sensed more than saw her smile, "He's very likeable. At least Jade seems to think so."

They started walking again.

"I'm glad you like it," she said after a moment of silence. "Hedwig must be thrilled you work here," she chuckled and he hummed a little.

"Yes, Jade brings him sometimes for lunch."

Casey smiled, she would love to do that one day, spend lunch with Hedwig at the zoo, "That sounds like fun." She stopped suddenly, hand going out, catching his arm, so overwhelmed with surprise she had almost forgotten.

"Oh! Congratulations!"

She could just feel him looking at her in confusion, and she made a face.  _Way to just blurt out nonsense Casey._

"Barry told me that you did it, you got your GED, that's fantastic!"

He wished he could see her, get to witness the smile he could hear in her voice. Was she proud of him?

Foolish, yes, but he wanted to know. He shrugged.

"Yes. It went fairly well."

She laughed, "with your memory I'm sure you aced it."

Dennis didn't respond.

"You did, didn't you?" Casey asked, almost accusing and at his stubborn silence she shook her head.

"I'll just ask Barry."

"Is he here?" Dennis asked, heading down the trail again, and Casey nodded.

"Yeah we came together but I lost him to a scavenger hunt."

Dennis felt his chest clench. They came together.

"I'm sure we'll find him eventually." She added, her voice floating in the dark. He remembered his light, wondered if he should click it on for her. But then she stepped on uneven pavement and her hand brushed his arm, a steadying motion but it lingered, it tightened the air around him and he selfishly left his light in his pocket. He let his hand guide her arm. Helpful, not too close, but he was  _near._

What was he doing. There were times in his life where he realized just how pathetic he really was. Casey was here with his brother. And here he stood craving idle touch in the dark.

But she was  _here._ He hadn't been expecting it. Maybe he should have been. Jade and Barry still saw her, and they were coming tonight but it seemed like everything about Casey had been so carefully removed from his life that he hadn't thought she could just stumble back in on her own.

He had done what he was supposed to and coldly walked away. But no one had prepared him for the after. For the days that still passed and weren't exactly empty. Life still happened, still grew and even flourished. He had done better for himself, was doing better. In a job he didn't hate, with a brother that had learned his carefully packaged secrets and hadn't hated him. He was in a place he never would have considered he would reach.

In so many ways he was content.

But why did content have to be so alone.

He functioned on his own as he had always done, kept to himself and his schedule with very little stress or interruptions. It was a life he had always meant to live.

But that was before Casey had changed the meaning of silence, turned it into something you could share. Before she had traced his scars with fingers that shook with whatever was hidden in her eyes. Casey, that had secrets and knew secrets and had been forced to pull out her own still managed to walk gently in a quiet night. She should know fear and anger and bitter reality but she didn't let them shape her. She didn't let them shape the way she viewed others.

She had seen him, scarred and rough and distant to the point he was rude and had still settled against his dresser and asked if she could share his quiet.

She had felt his hands move in a crazed dream, felt him hurt her in a memory Dennis would never be able to erase, and still didn't start from his touch.

Casey had known him.

Somehow, somehow she had wanted him.

And he hadn't let her.

He knew why, of course he knew why, she deserved so much out of life and she was getting it now, without him. She was free, in college now, with, with Barry now. She was doing so well. But what did he do when right and regret tasted the same and he was left with words he could never say on his tongue.

Light was growing as they drew nearer the open portion of the zoo. Her face stood less in shadow, gaze forward as she walked, hair falling straight against her cheek.

Dennis cleared his throat. "How's school going?"

Her gaze darted, surprise faintly evident in the dark. "Oh. It's good."

She hadn't realized he knew she was taking classes. She had no idea how much he had heard from Barry, or Jade, how much he even cared to hear about.

They were in sight of the path, still vague figured in the dark when Dennis halted.

The dark was wearing off. It felt like the moment they reached the main path whatever this bubble of comfortable conversation was would pop. Like she had been given a moment outside of reality.

"Casey," the bubble trembled, casual and light began to dissipate by the weight of his tone.

She turned to him, face pale and eyes reflecting the lights. She looked like the space between stars and Dennis swallowed.

"I heard about your uncle. What you did, it was brave."

The lights trembled in her eyes.

She had grown past it, the fear, the disbelief, had learned to live in this new life without her uncle's hold but it was different. Dennis's voice, that low tone that somehow lay so even but held so much. He fit a depth of concern into just the way he said her name and Casey felt the tremor of her breath in her heart.

"I can't believe it's over." Her whisper cracked.

She had celebrated with Jade and Barry, watched them dance in their joy when her uncle was arrested, but they didn't truly know the depths she had been freed from. They didn't know the extent of the scars that lay below unmarred skin.

Dennis knew. He knew all her ugly past and had held against it. Had let her be weak and let her be held and let her be broken without ever making her feel ashamed.

She missed that.

She  _needed_ that.

For as much as Barry and Jade and anyone else cared, they would never  _understand_.

Dennis understood. He stepped forward and let the shadows help gather her to him. He held her in the knowledge that she was safe and she was whole and he fought to find a voice that didn't work.

"I'm glad it over."

It was all her could manage to say.

Casey clung, to the fabric of his shirt, to the feel of her arms solid around her. He was hugging her in shared relief that something horrible had passed, _but Casey held on longer than she should._

_Until he was not hugging, but holding and she was caressed against him and the distance figures on the passing trail were forgotten. Until the starlight met the streetlights and the city turned quiet, and Casey stood in that breath of peace._

_Until her racing heart had calmed into a slow rhythm of their breathing._

_Before his fingers trailed across the skin of her neck and her breath sped with her heartbeat. Before the light burned in his eyes and her chin was lifted to hold her lips mere space away from his._

_Until she wasn't a mistake that he didn't want and she forgot that he had ever said goodbye._

Until Casey blinked back to that shadowed walk and found Dennis pulling away from the brief hug.

Dennis released her, stepping back before his hands began to shake, before he forgot every reason he had ever done anything and held her far longer than he should.

They were friends who hadn't seen each other in a while.

Dennis needed to act like it.

"Sorry," Casey stepped back with an embarrassed half-laugh, nervous fingers tucking her hair behind her ear. "I still get a little shaky about it sometimes," she tried to shrug it off, looked away like it was nothing.

"You shouldn't be sorry, Casey."

He was standing five feet away now. He should not be able to feel that  _intense_ but she felt him looking at her, sincere and direct.

He had said it was a mistake, kissing him, trying for one insane moment to be with him and she had spent weeks stubbornly just  _not_  thinking about that.

About how he was partly right. No amount of feeling or situation would change the fact that she had been underage and that she never should have kissed him. No matter how badly she wanted to scream against it, that had been a mistake.

But what did she do when a mistake  _felt_  like the first truly good thing in her life.

You shouldn't wish to make mistakes again. People avoided them. Spent their lives teaching younger generations to learn from them.

It was a mistake Casey never wanted to forget.

Something that should have been so right had been twisted just the smallest fraction and had become entirely wrong.

Casey couldn't argue with that.

But Dennis could not stop being Dennis. Strict and so rigid a lesser man would break. So closed down unless you learned to read the space between the steel in his eye.

Dennis was watching her in that quiet, unwavering way that you felt against your skin and told her what Dennis would never say.

That he cared.

Maybe not the way she wanted, certainly not in the tainted way he feared. But in a constant, underlying way that touched Casey more than any words Barry or anyone else would ever say.

Dennis was so closed off he only reserved enough of himself to care about the things that truly mattered to him.

And to Dennis, she mattered.

She knew it didn't shape her place in this world, that it didn't change who she was or what she was capable of. She was who she was without Dennis or anyone else.

But in this quiet that stretched with the ebb of sound fading in from the people who walked nearby, Casey realized something.

She didn't miss the things Dennis did for her. She missed who he  _was_

And the fact that that man thought she mattered didn't change who she was.

But it changed what she saw. Somehow, knowing that, Casey could look at the person she was, the one she never really wanted to really look at because there was always something not worth seeing, and begin to see something else.

"You know," she smiled, the kind when happy just got a little too much to hold, and she said what she shouldn't and let the stars fall where they may, "I missed you Dennis."

Dennis didn't hesitate.

Maybe he should have.

"I missed you too, Casey."

Something in Casey fell free. She sighed suddenly, head falling back to stare up at the sky.

"People never really expect their lives to turn out the way they do, do they."

"I suppose not," Dennis's hands found his pockets, he turned to watch Casey's faint silhouette as she turned in place.

"I used to do this as a kid," she added, not really completing subjects, content to just let them bounce around. She spun and watched the stars spin above. "To see how long I could go before I fell down."

"Why would you intentionally fall, Casey?" Dennis's voice was so dry, Casey brought her head down to look at him.

"Woah," a wave of dizziness hit her and she stumbled.

Dennis caught her. Without fuss or circumstance he stepped forward and let his hands stop her from falling.

She clung to his arms, laughing lightly. "Thanks. Falling probably would not have been fun anymore."

"Probably not."

He said it like it was obvious and Casey made a face at him he couldn't see. She didn't know what had come over her. She hadn't felt this relaxed in a while.

The sound of stirring branches rustled above and Dennis's shoulders hunching against sudden wind.

Casey shivered, arms folding over her stomach. "This stupid dress," she muttered, and Dennis's brow rose, his hands slipping over the sheer sleeves.

"You don't have a jacket?"

"Well I was going to wear a sweatshirt but I wasn't allowed."

She heard his short huff of breath, somehow keenly aware and yet complete unconcerned that his hands were still on her, fingers spreading warmth into her arms. She shifted closer against the wind.

"Not allowed?"

She sighed, "One of my roommates got me to try on her clothes then Barry showed up before I could change back."

"Ah." Dennis allowed. It was there again, that grating reminder. She had come here with Barry.

What on earth had happened that made him just completely ready to ignore that?

He wouldn't act out against it but in this moment it was if everything past the shadows had just faded out, not out of existence, but out of  _mattering._

They talked, and he shifted to turn his back to the wind, and she stayed right in front of him.

Her head tilted up to look at him as she spoke, his hand rested still against her arm. Connected and close without crossing boundaries or thought.

"Joseph isn't as bad as I thought he would be," Casey was saying, now on the topic of her roommates. "He's here tonight actually," she looked around as if they'd be able to the see him, "working security like you."

Dennis just shrugged, he hadn't met any of the other guys yet and didn't really plan to.

"And Orwell helps me study. I'm not as quick as you are when it comes to learning things."

He heard the smirk in her voice and the corner of his lip lifted.

"And Claire and Marcia are great. They're a lot sometimes but they're nice and they love Jade."

"So you're happy there?" Dennis asked softly and Casey shrugged.

"Yeah, it's a good place and it's close to the school. It's a little crowded sometimes, but I have my own room."

She shrugged again, not really knowing what to say.

"I'm glad," he spoke simply but sincerely and Casey felt her stomach warm.

"Dennis," she began abruptly, stepping a half step closer, suddenly uncertain of how to say or what she even wanted to say. She wanted to thank him for being a part of what got her through the darkness. To apologize for messing up, for lying to him. To broach the subject that they hadn't mentioned but could never forget. That she had stood in his arms and felt his kiss and even in innocent conversation there was a part of her that was alive with that knowledge.

A part of her that tracked every touch in the back of her mind and felt it somewhere deep inside of her. A part of her that stood comfortable and relaxed and so easily with Dennis but still felt that thrum of energy underneath.

There was something about Dennis that always seemed to pulse just below her skin. Sometimes subtly, almost gently, an acknowledgment to his presence that she had never felt with anyone else.

She was aware of him. Of his stance, and strength and casual movement that shifted that body close.

Dennis made her lose track of herself and somehow find her self all at once.

"Ohh Caaaasssey?"

She groaned at the voice rolling through the shadows.

Barry was looking for her.

Dennis turned, his hand falling absently from her arm as they spotted Barry skipping by on the trail.

"Oh Casseeey…."

Dennis grunted a little. "We should answer."

Casey snorted, content to watch Barry run around. "You should answer." She shot back.

With a long suffering sigh, Dennis reached into his pocket and pulled out his light. With a lingering look at Casey's shaded face, he clicked it on so Barry could find them in the dark.


	34. Stumbled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey guys! Thank you for all the comments and suggestions and reactions that are both encouraging and often have me in fits of laughter! I read your expressive comments themselves and think dang, wish I could write like that. Truth time, I know as a reader sometimes how frustrating it can be to wait all week for an update just to have nothing seem to happen, and it's like come onnnn, you're killing me here. I never wanted to do that to you guys (I may secretly take it as a compliment when I make my readers cry but I would never toy with them intentionally. Not for a long time anyway) But I also wanted to invest something more into these characters than a cheap quick fix. Casey and Dennis have complex problems and sometimes they just don't listen to me when I talk. The end is in sight, they're just both a little stubborn when it comes to getting there.
> 
> I'm attempting to update on a quicker schedule to leave less of that angsty down time in- between (hence the shorter chapters and more than a few typos, sorry!)
> 
> Thank you, thank you, thank you, for reading and sharing your thoughts that seriously brighten my day!
> 
> Yall are hilarious and encouraging and sometimes downright adorable.
> 
> Now enough of this, on to what you really came here for, the next chapter!

"Oh, hey." Barry came skidding up, "What in heaven's name are you doing over here?"

He snaked his arms through Casey's and began to lead her away. "The hunt's over," he glanced at his brother, "Hey Dennis," then he drew up in surprise, "Dennis! Hey, what's up. Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"I am." Dennis responded and Casey flushed a little,

"I was trespassing. He caught me."

" _Trespassing._  What a rebel. Well since you're already slacking off, Dennis, let's go find Jade."

Dennis pulled out his phone and checked the time, he was due for a break and Barry seemed bent on him taking it now.

"I have fifteen minutes." He stated and Barry made a face.

"Yes I'm sure the zoo will disintegrate if you aren't back at your post."

Casey tugged on Barry's arm, "Oh come on, let's find Jade."

Barry talked about narrowly beating another team, pulling Casey along.

She crossed into growing light and Dennis trailed behind.

Dennis watched her, the way her gaze was drawn to the lights that crossed the walkway. The absent way she hummed in response as Barry talked. The way her eyes turned back to glance his way and caught him watching.

Light caught on cheeks tinged pink. Her eyes darted back to Barry.

Dennis looked away. But not a moment later he was drawn back, to the way she walked, small but graceful, to the dress that  _clung_  in ways Casey never would have chosen. It hugged tight to the curves Casey kept hidden and for that reason alone he managed to look away. His pulse felt thick and he cleared his throat. He wouldn't treat Casey like she was on display.

They neared the crowded courtyard and spotted Luke waving beside Jade. Dennis saw her brow shoot high when she saw Casey, heard her gush over how Casey looked, taking her arms and turning Casey this way and that. He watched the way Casey's fingers caught in the sheer material of her sleeves, tangled them up in a nervous mess.

Luke had saved them a table and Barry dropped into a seat, shrugging out of his jacket,

"Whew, it's not as cold as I'd thought it'd be."

"Especially after running around like a lunatic?" Jade asked, and Barry huffed, waving a hand at Casey.

"Well I found her didn't I?"

Casey didn't move to sit, seemed almost shy now with the others. Dennis passed by her, lifting Barry's jacket from the back of his chair as he leaned forward to steal one of Jade's fries.

Casey stood small, telling herself to get over that knot of anxiety that had formed as soon as Barry had pulled her onto the crowded path. No one was looking at her, she was here to have fun with the others, she just needed to relax.

Dennis cleared his throat, standing just to the side and Casey's gaze lifted.

He looked kind. Not in expression or stance or any discernable way, just something about him. Maybe it was the warmth of the lights that lit this place or the fact that she had not seen him in so long but something in his eyes made her certain that kindness existed in this world.

He held out Barry's jacket, a silent, subtle offer and Casey stepped forward, lifted a hand to take it from him and shrugged into its warmth.

Her smile was small but it held enough.

Barry glanced over as Casey sat down, eying the jacket in surprise. "looks good on you Case," Too distracted to wonder how she had gotten it.

Casey felt eyes on her. Jade had watched the quiet exchange and now was looking at her almost sadly. Like there was a shadow she couldn't get out of her eye.

She shook it away, sent Casey a smile before settling into Luke's side as he slipped an arm around her. He was asking Barry how school was going and Barry was happy to talk. Casey fingered the cuff of Barry's jacket and tried not to peek over her shoulder at the man who had given it to her.

He wasn't sitting. Why wasn't he sitting? There were a couple empty seats, it's not like there wasn't room. Casey turned to ask him when she saw her roommates headed their way.

She waved a little, watched Claire spot them and wave Marcia over. They were almost to them when Marcia suddenly let out a tiny squeal and shot out a hand, gripping Claire's arm in a nervous fit of surprise.

Barry glanced up at the sound, "Oh hey Marcia."

"Dennis?" she squeaked out, looking startled.

" _my arm."_ Claire protested, pulling it free of Marcia's claws.

"You know Dennis?" Barry asked, utterly baffled by the notion.

"Oh  _that's_  him?" Claire asked, under her breath but far louder than she realized, "Not bad," she nudged Marcia with her elbow, still rubbing her offended arm, eyes now appraising Dennis appreciatively.

Casey was watching too many pieces falling into place.

"Well, yeah," Marcia laughed a little at Barry's question like it should have been obvious, "I just didn't know  _you_  knew Dennis," she passed to Dennis's side, smiling up at him, "hey you," she added softly, reaching out to touch his arm.

Casey felt the color drain from her face.

Dennis was Marcia's maintenance man.

"Oh you have  _got_  to be kidding me." The voice was Jade's and Luke looked at her in question.

"What?"

Jade just waved a hand at the pair like it just summed up everything.

Barry was still  _entirely_  confused. "Well, yeah," he repeated Marcia's tone, "He's my brother."

Dennis just blinked at the new arrivals a few times. "Hello, Marica." He finally stated. He didn't know why Jade looked so irritated. Or how Barry and Marcia knew each other. Why Marcia was  _touching_  him. Her hand was still on his arm.

Something clicked then. Casey had said her roommate's name was Marcia. He looked to her to confirm, and his chest clenched at the look on her face.

She had gone pale, cheeks dotted with high color, a flashing, suppressed look in her eye that looked half like pain and half like anger and half something Dennis couldn't pronounce, but he felt it. He felt it hit him and he suddenly didn't care one wit about figuring out how anyone knew anyone else. Something was wrong with Casey.

Casey breathed, trying to get a grip on the anger, on the hurt. She should have put it together. Steely eyes, hard exterior, rough, large, silent. It all made sense now, every stupid little thing Marcia had gushed about. It was Dennis. It had always been Dennis.

Marcia had been parading it right in front of her and she hadn't even known.

Marcia with her perfect hair and effortlessly lined eyes and tiny little outfits had caught Dennis's attention and Casey couldn't even be angry because Dennis wasn't  _hers._

He had made sure of that. Walked away because she was too young and needed a life first but Marcia was  _one freaking year older than her_ and Dennis didn't have a problem with that?

Casey was angry. Angry because she knew it wasn't just age. Marcia wasn't broken and Marcia wasn't stupid. She hadn't lied to Dennis and cost him his job and pulled him down into something wrong just because she had wanted to. Marcia was bright and she was happy and smart and beautiful and Casey really  _really_  shouldn't hate her for that but at the moment she really couldn't bring herself to care.

Because the man she couldn't bring herself to forget had moved on without her.

Casey should be used to it by now, what it was to be left behind.

"You're brothers?" Marcia was completely stunned. "I had no idea," she laughed, and Barry waved a hand,

"Yes, yes, that's obvious, but back to how you know Dennis…" He was eyeing the hand on his brother's arm like it was something foreign. But Dennis wasn't shaking her off. Dennis wasn't even looking at her.

He was fixed and Casey and Barry glanced at the seat next to him.

"You okay, hon?" he asked. Casey looked a little piqued.

"I'm going to get a drink."

Casey spoke quickly, ashamed of herself for not being stronger, not being able to keep this from her face. She used to be more reserved. Freedom had softened her.

She pushed away from the table, and walked away. Head down and not looking, not looking at any of it.

When did she get this pathetic?

Barry shrugged and looked back at Marcia, "So…"

But Dennis cleared his throat, stepping back stiffly, "I have to get back to work."

He left before Marcia could say anything, before Barry could make one sassy comment and strode toward the slight figure disappearing in the crowd.

Barry patted the seat beside him as Claire dropped into the one across.

"Sit down honey,' he said to Marcia, "You have some explaining to do."

* * *

Casey stomped down that same stupid trail. She didn't care if she wasn't allowed back there. Dennis wasn't around to stop her. He was back there. With Marcia.

_You're being a highschool drama queen Casey, get it together._

Angry tears welled and she snarled inwardly at them. She was such a baby. She had no right to react this way. She had no  _right._

She hadn't made it far into the shadows when she felt someone behind her, a hand suddenly reaching out to stop her.

She jerked around, fully prepared to tell whatever lurking security man off, fully hoping it was Joseph Dunn because he could do with a good yelling at.

It wasn't Joseph's shadow that blocked out the lights.

"Casey," Dennis's voice held the sharp bite of concern, "what's wrong."

"Nothing," Casey bit back, jerking her arm from under his hand. She really didn't need his touch right now.

"That isn't true." Dennis countered reasonably, not liking the way her breath sped or her hands fisted in the dark. She seemed almost frightened.

"Casey," he pressed. It was obvious she had been upset by something and he wasn't comfortable doing nothing. He had had to stand by for weeks while she faced enough hardships on her own. He hadn't planned to see her but he was here now and if he could help there wasn't much that would stop him. "Talk to me."

She laughed, the angry, harsh kind and Dennis stilled.

" _talk_  to you? You shut me out, Dennis.  _You_ walked away, and I know I did some stupid crap but we're not friends anymore because  _you_  didn't want to be."

Casey didn't like that she was mad. Casey didn't like that she was throwing words against him in some vain attempt to get something to stick. What happened to calm Casey who faced things and was unfazed?

She used to yell at her teachers. Because it got her detention. She never meant it.

Casey had learned long ago getting angry wasn't safe.

Maybe that was the difference. Casey was safe now. She faced a rigid, unrelenting shadow of a man twice her size and strength and not a single ounce of her was afraid.

Dennis's lips pressed tight against a surge of frustration, arms settling over his chest in a bone deep habit that Casey scoffed at, wondering how Marcia would describe that.

"I didn't want that, Casey." She was angry with him and he figured that was fair. He had offered support just to take it back. But he knew she wouldn't be alone. Jade, Barry, the Dunn's, they all had every intention of helping her through it. She had their strength when she was too uncertain in her own that she thought she needed it.

Dennis had stepped back because he knew there would be plenty to take his place. And someone else had stepped in.

He had just never considered it would be his brother.

Briefly he wondered if this was what Jade meant, if Barry had been there for Casey and she had latched on to that, cared for Barry naturally because of what he had done for her and that sick, stupid voice in the back of his mind whispered that it could have been him.

He could have stayed and let her settle against him. Settle  _for_  him. She could have been content in the monotonous life he lived if she had never learned to be free. Casey was used to being caged. She could have been kept and never known there was something more.

Which was exactly why Dennis had walked away. From her. From himself and the selfish things he wanted because she deserved a life that Dennis couldn't bring himself to live.  _Full_  of the bright things that people chased that just exhausted him.

And he could never give that to her. He could never bring that out in her.

Barry could.

Barry  _was._

She had made friends, was here with them, in a dress that there was nothing wrong with except it looked nothing like her, but maybe it should. She didn't have to hide behind layers and wary eyes and if they were bringing that out in her he was glad.

He should be glad.

And he  _was_  but he didn't know how to not miss her or how to not wonder how a person he had known so well was changing for the better and he was still that same stoic line. He was not fit to be with for more than a moment. Everyone around him always moved on.

He was comfortable. Unshaken. And Alone.

He had been for years.

And he had never cared before her.

"If you didn't want that then why did you do it?" she challenged. "you chose not to be friends."

Dennis sighed.

"but you didn't want to be friends, Casey." He reminded her.

Simple truth in a tone completely unaffected.

Casey's cheeks flamed. What happened to the unspoken rule that they weren't going to talk about this?

But why shouldn't he. She couldn't hide from it, pretend it hadn't happened. Dennis was  _there_ , he'd seen her desperate want. She should have been more restrained. Never let on that she cared about him, that she had wanted him.

But he had said he wanted her too.

_So would I._

It had played, again and again around and around in a nauseating dizzy circle. He had said he would do it all over again. The mistakes and the touch and the moments spent in his arms. It was wrong and destructive and so incredibly stupid to want back but he had said he wanted it too.

He had said.

Did he not mean it?

And it spiraled then, the weak, foolish shame, like a force driving down into her. She had believed him. Taken his words and trusted them when she should have known better. Why would Dennis want  _her?_  She had been weak and pathetic and he had tried to help her. Maybe he didn't have the heart to tell her the truth. Maybe he was relieved when David Dunn finally took her away because he didn't have to pretend any more.

Oh she had been stupid. So naively stupid.

_No one will ever want you caseybear, not now._

"Oh," Casey took a step back, "Oh, I didn't." She swallowed. She wouldn't cry. She could handle that much. "I'm sorry for yelling at you Dennis. I'll let you get back to Marcia."

She tried to walk away.

"What?" Dennis asked, taken back by the comment that had come from nowhere. "why would I go back to Marica?"

Casey's voice came over her shoulder. Small. Controlled disinterest. "Because you're with her now."

Dennis's reaction was entirely instinctual and entirely too systematic. His fingers closed on Casey's forearm, turning her so what was left of the lights this far into shadow fell into her face. His hand grazed her cheek, settled onto her jaw to direct her gaze to his own. He towered and held her direct before him.

" _what do you mean I'm with marcia."_

Casey shivered. There was anger in that tone. Anger and shock and energy that filled the air between them, like all the anger she had thrown against him was left simmering in the air.

"I, well, aren't you?" her voice had gone light and she heard it waver. She just wanted to be free, Away from the strain in her voice that would give her away. Away from the reminder of how foolish she had been.

" _Casey,"_ it was chiding reluctance and his thumb brushed her cheek. Fingers trailed up the sleeve of her dress. "how could you think that."

"But she said," Casey protested, breath catching at the touching, lingering reminders of everything she had longed for in the moments her thoughts drifted. His hand found her waist, tugged her closer with direct intent, anger still evident in those eyes.

"I would never want Marcia."

Dennis's lip twisted with the words. How on earth could she think that. How could she  _ever_  think that?

Yes he had walked away but every step had been for her, every decision only possible because of what he would be giving her. He had never  _wanted_ that.

How could she not know that?

Frustration made his hands strangely unsteady. The feel of her made them weak. He never should have approached her in the dark. He was on dangerous ground and he chose his words carefully.

"I know you're with Barry but I-"

He felt her small shake of surprise. "Why does everyone keep saying that? _?"_

Dennis frowned. He had thought it was fact. "You mean you're not?"

"No!" her response if anything was definitive, "Why on earth would you think that?" and Dennis was blinking through a turntable of thoughts.

"Why would you think I was with Marcia." He countered, voice twisting with the obvious, "you know I don't want that."

Casey choked on the feeling running through her. He couldn't pull her closer and not expect her to be unaffected. He couldn't say words like that and just expect her to understand.

"How would I know that Dennis?" the shaking in her voice made her want to grimace. She didn't want to give in to the feel of him. To admit that after weeks of silence that all she wanted to was step a little bit closer and just find him again.

"You know what I want Casey." Dennis stated.

She hated what she felt when his voice went that low.

Of everything she thought she missed that the most.

"I don't, Dennis." She hissed. She really didn't. Confusion felt like fear and she trembled beneath it.

'I  _want,_ " Dennis's fingers flexed against her, his breath rose beneath her palms, her heart thudded in the place his fingers brushed her neck, "What I've always wanted, Casey." Dennis answered,

How had her hands found his chest? She hadn't remembered moving them. Hadn't intended to touch him like this but somehow they were pressed and faintly shaking against him. She was angry and confused and a little too eager for the shadows to stretch around them, for the stars to forget what they saw. Dennis only every touched her when no one was looking and she wouldn't let anything stop this.

"Casseey?" Barry's voice came through the dark, searching, taking it on himself to find her  _again_.

They completely ignored him.

A tear shimmered and fell, a calloused finger brushing it away.

"God help me Casey, I've only wanted you."

Casey's breath constricted in her chest.

She had believed he wanted her once.

She couldn't possibly be stupid enough to do it again.

But doubt couldn't exist against that much intent.

Dennis didn't let it.

There wasn't space between them. Whether she pressed up on expectant tiptoe. Whether he gathered her there against him the dark. Whether the shadows themselves fled from the heat between them and left nothing behind, it did not matter. She was pressed and fit against him and his lips brushed hers in that dimly lit night.

Something changed in Casey

To call it frantic or desperate would be to say that panic lay beneath their touch. That fear propelled them, afraid the other would break away. Casey couldn't know fear right now.

Because Dennis tasted like strength and felt like control that she didn't need to break for it to overwhelm her. He wasn't overcome with some stupid, senseless decision he would regret later when she wasn't willing and seeking against him. There was certainty in those fingertips. Every touch was a decisive choice.

Passion that was careless would never be this intense.

She felt the heat of his palm at the small of her back, the pressure of each fingertip as it pressed into her hip. She did not know how she could be so aware of each part of him, so overwhelmed with the slightest touch, so taken by the expanse of him.

But it built into something Casey couldn't manage and when her fingers tangled into the fabric of his jacket it was because she needed him to keep her contained.

He did. His fingers flexed against her and his touch turned slow.

A light clicked on abruptly, catching the pair and Casey whimpered in small shock. She went to break free but Dennis wasn't done. She gasped and stumbled just that much closer and heard Dennis's grunt of laughter, the dark kind of chuckle that held an edge she felt in her toes.

He traced her lips and ignored the figure waiting that would break this moment with Casey. He wasn't willing to go back.

Back to when others decided what he wanted and what it was safe to touch. Back to cold distance and never knowing from moment to moment how Casey was or what she faced. Back to the grey days without her that would thrum on unending unless he did something to break them.

He pulled just slightly back, taking his time. His forehead rested against hers and their breathing fought for control.

Casey's face turned and she peeked at the figure behind the light.

Barry stood in the utmost shock.

"I, I, I." he stammered, unable to continue.

"I think we broke Barry." Casey murmured.

Dennis's gaze never left her face.

"I don't care."


	35. Until

Barry recovered. "What the actual Fu—" a group a kids ran by and he coughed.

Dennis looked at his brother.

"Nope. Nope. Nooooope." Barry backed away from the completely reasonable look in Dennis's eye. Like he hadn't just witnessed something  _completely impossible_.

He would, he would tell Jade. He grasped on to it. Somehow that would help. Jade would know what to do.

"Dennis, you can't just. Casey, what are you.  _DID THAT ACTUALLY JUST HAPPEN!_ " Barry was panting in place.

And Casey was torn between embarrassment and a burst of insane laughter.

The laughter won.

"Calm down, Barry." Dennis stated, unconcerned that Casey was laughing somewhat uncontrollably right beside him.

"She's lost her mind," Barry muttered, staring at Casey, "But what's  _your_  excuse," he pointed an accusing finger at Dennis. "Seriously, man, you can't just kiss her like that! She's, she's," Barry gestured vaguely like that would explain what he was trying to say. His light flashed erratically across them, and Dennis grimaced.

Dennis's hands scrubbed over his face, of course his brother was in shock. He tried to set aside the high still pulsing through him, to steady hands that still slightly shook. He focused on being reasonable. "I shouldn't have done that."

Casey's laughter dried up. "What?" her hand caught Dennis's sleeve, eyes wide, "Don't do this to me again."

Barry let out a sound Dennis couldn't really identify. "Again? AGAIN? This has happened before?"

But Dennis's attention was fixed on Casey, on the fear he felt in the tension of her fingertips on his arm. "I meant telling Barry to calm down," he explained quietly. Barry's light was back and fixed on them intently, like he was afraid to let them out of his sight. It cut across Dennis's brow and left a shadow in his eyes, highlighted a jaw that was set but lips that held a soft curve.

"Oh, Casey colored, her look of relief almost childlike, her gaze fixed with Dennis's and Barry scoffed.

How were they still ignoring him?

He pointed a finger at Casey "This is why you wouldn't date me? Ooh it is, isn't. I can't believe this.  _Dennis? Dennis? You wouldn't date me but you'd go for Dennis?_ I'm all  _whatever_  but him it's like  _sign me up_?""

"Barry," Casey frowned at him, eyes turned away from his brother long enough to fix him with a look. "You said you didn't actually want to date me."

Barry harrumphed, "It's the principal of the matter."

Dennis had stood silent, letting Casey handle the exchange but now he went to speak and Barry wagged a finger at him.

"Un uh, nope. Can't do it. This didn't happen. It just didn't."

He walked backward, staring them down before his feet met the larger path and he turned and jogged away.

"Well that was…" Casey blew out a breath, her eyes peering up at him now. A smile hovering at the corners of her mouth. She had managed to squash the laughter but the joy wouldn't stop. She could feel it, threatening to get the best of her. She had learned long ago how to keep her expression subdued but she couldn't seem to control it now.

She felt as if she had just been plopped in the center of someone else's story, trying to play catch up with everything that had just happened. Part of her was as shocked as Barry had been. If she stepped back and looked at it, this was completely insane. She couldn't be  _kissing_  Dennis.

She was 18, and plain, and kicked into the shadows of everyone else's story. A background character to fill in scenes, not interesting enough to get her own story arc.

She wasn't what someone like Dennis went for.

She didn't know what it was about the man that made her not realize until after the fact. Moments with him were so natural, so insanely both pleasant and intense that she never actually thought about what was going on. Because she didn't have to. Casey, who spent her life calculating moves to find the path of least notice, got to just  _be_ with Dennis.

But Barry's reaction had her thinking that maybe she was just a little bit crazy.

"Um," she cleared her throat, fingers tangling in her sleeves, " _did_ that just happen?"

"Yes." He should have questioned her sanity. Instead he fixed her with a look that had her feeling her heartbeat in her fingertips. "Would you like me to prove it to you?"

Casey sputtered on laughter, her fingers covering her lips. She felt giddy and she wasn't used to it.

"Yes. I, I mean no, I mean," she spoke through her fingers, cheeks heating and Dennis's gaze softened. He reached up, taking her fingers from her lips and held them gently.

"It's okay, Casey. I have to get back to work. But can I," his brow furrowed, looking almost confused. She watched him swallow, "Can I see you later?"

Casey's fingers traced the callouses on his hand. It amazed her, the man who had just melted her against him was almost afraid to ask if he could see her later.

She cocked a brow. "You'd better."

He laughed then, a short exhale of relief. Casey had to resist the urge to cling to his fingers when he let her go.

She could be practical. Dennis had a job to do. She could turn and walk away like nothing had happened.

Because she would see him again. He had said so. She believed him.

* * *

Barry practically collided with their table.

"What is wrong with you now," Jade demanded, saving her soda before it spilled. Barry was gasping from running all the way here.

"Casey. Dennis. They're, they're  _fraternizing."_

"Um, what?" Claire asked, pulling her scarf out from under Barry's hand. He had practically landed on her. Marcia had paused with a fry half to her mouth and was just blinking at him.

Jade groaned, "I knew it."

Barry back pedaled from the table. "You knew? You  _knew?_ You couldn't have known, Jade, because it  _isn't possible_."

Luke took a drink of Jade's soda and purposely turned around, stepping out of the conversation, but Jade rolled her eyes and grabbed her drink back.

"Oh, calm down Barry. It's not that big of a deal."

Barry sputtered. Marcia had finally lowered her fry. "Um, what's not that big of a deal?" her voice was a little breathy and realization dawned on Claire's face.

"You mean," she gaped between Marcia and Barry, "Casey and Dennis are  _together?"_

Marcia blanched when she said it and Jade scoffed.

"It's just a phase. She'll get over it."

"How are you this calm?" Barry huffed.

"How, how could they do this?" Marcia half whispered. Jade seemed to notice her then.

"Look, hun. I don't know what you thought you had with Dennis but the man is as dense as a solid oak door, and nowhere near as easy to open. Dennis probably doesn't even know your name."

Luke flinched as Marcia's face went red. "Oof, babe."

Jade threw up her hands, "look, I'm sorry but Barry's about to have a heart attack because Casey and Dennis don't know what's good for them."

"Well of course he's  _angry,_ " Marcia glowered at Jade, "Casey's supposed to be with him and now she's all over his brother."

Jade sent her brother a  _look._ "Casey's with you, is she?"

Barry's cheeks tinged pink, flashing a boyish smile as if that would advert the lasers in her eyes. "No, course not. We're just friends." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, "No really. We actually are."

Claire was watching him like she did  _not_ believe him, and Marcia looked ready to stab him in the eye with a carefully selected fork. Barry groaned.

"We never dated!"

Gosh flirting really got him in trouble sometimes.

"But that's not the point." His hand slapped the table, "They kissed," he jabbed a finger at Jade, "You knew," his finger moved on to Marcia, "and what on earth is wrong with you."

But before any of them could answer, Casey neared their table. Marcia saw her, eyes flashing she stood quickly and gathered her things in a show of pointed dismissal. Claire spotted Casey, and quickly scrambled up to stand by Marcia.

Casey came to a stop.

Luke was facing the completely opposite direction and looked so tense he was about to fall of the seat bench.

Jade was cutting Barry down with her eyes.

Barry looked like a kitten surrounded by hungry crocodiles and Casey felt just a little bit bad for him.

But Claire and Marcia were hard to get past.

Hip popped and arms folded, Marica tossed her a look Casey was pretty sure was reserved for cheerleader drama and sassy five-year old's, but she stopped and waited for one of them to talk.

"We're leaving, "Marcia sniffed, " _you_ can walk home."

Claire was a little bit disappointed. She thought Marcia was about to purse slap Casey. But Marcia had a way of playing like people were just below her notice. It may be less flashy, but it was far colder.

Casey blinked. "Okay."

They turned on their heels and walked away.

It took Casey half a second to realize what Marcia's problem was, and when she did, her eyes widened.

Barry must have told them.

Marcia thought she was here with Dennis.

_Why_ did Marcia think that again?

She felt a little bad seeing Marcia miffed, and Claire defensive but she found she was far less bothered than she should be. Maybe that made her a terrible friend. Or maybe she was still stuck on that little incomprehensible cloud and she'd have to come down and be sorry later.

But for now she sat down and took one of Marcia's left behind fries.

Barry plopped down beside her, face on his fists as he stared at the table. Casey offered him a fry and he took it, biting it in half like it had sassed him. Jade went to speak and he waved the bitten fry at her.

"un uh. You don't get to talk. No one does."

Silence fell over the table, and Casey found she was just fine with that. She trailed her fries through a line of ketchup and tried repeatedly to keep that pesky little smile off of her face.

* * *

"yeah… I'm not giving you Casey's number."

Joseph Dunn stared at the larger man across from him. Dennis Crumb had found him in the locker room, and after awkwardly introducing himself had politely asked for Casey's number.

He watched as Dennis sighed, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. Dennis didn't seem to remember the first time they met, but Joseph did. He full well remembered the large, scary man who had chased him away from Casey. Granted, Joseph had been being a bit of a schmuck, and his dad's opinion on the man seemed to have changed, but he wasn't going to give any one's number away without permission. Especially not a girl's. Especially not Casey's.

Dennis turned away, angry with himself for thinking this was a good idea. Fifteen minutes before end of shift, Dennis had realized he didn't have her phone number. He could have just asked Barry. He should have just asked him, but he had practically walked into one of Casey's roommates and the question had just come out.

But Casey's friend didn't seem too pleased with him.

Dennis was used to not making good impressions but the current situation irritated him. He thought of texting David Dunn himself for it, then decided that was a conversation he didn't want to have.

He gave up, leaving the locker room without saying another word to the boy. Not an intentional dismissal, he just didn't think to say anything else. He would have to ask Barry and just hope his brother with in a better mood.

He thought about it, how Barry had found them. About the way Casey had fit and felt and flooded into him. He should feel guilty but he couldn't do it. He was tired of other people thinking he was a mistake.

Because the truth was, Jade might be right. Casey's interest might be a faze, a rebound after trauma or whatever the heck Jade wanted to call it. She was worried Casey would latch on to him and then not be able to walk away but Jade was wrong. Because Dennis would never hold her back.

Casey wanted him, here, now, and it didn't matter that it might not last for her, or that she might come to realize she wanted something else. Dennis would be the right now. The next stepping stone in recovery. He could do that. Be there for her. With her. Be what she needed.

Until she walked away.

* * *

Luke had walked Casey home. She still wasn't really sure how he had managed it, but he had subtly steered Barry and Jade on their own ways and offered Casey the peace of a quiet walk. She wanted to tell him it wasn't necessary. The streets were dark but she could handle them on her own. Luke had let a bit of that southern charm through and convinced her.

He was pleasant, and calming in a way that made Casey realize how good he and Jade fit together. They softened and sharpened each other in little give and takes. She thought about Barry's maybe somewhat sincere exacerbation that she wouldn't date him. He was so caught up in the flamboyancy of the idea that she doubted he had ever really thought about it. Barry pushed her and pulled her to do more and be more and become this brighter person. He was fun but he exhausted her into someone she wasn't. Casey was quiet. She didn't always need to be convinced to be loud.

Truth was she would bore Barry. She wasn't too bothered by the notion, and he would realize it eventually.

Luke dropped her at the door and waited until she had made it inside. The house was dark, no one had left a light on for her. She hadn't gotten home too far behind the others, but she tip-toed around in the quiet house in case they had already managed to fall asleep.

She wondered if she should check and see if Marcia was up, try and talk to her. But what would she say? Marcia had made it seem like her and her 'maintenance man' were practically an item, but Dennis had been shocked by the idea.

More than shocked.

He had been angry. Angry that she would think, that she would believe he would want Marcia. Like it was unthinkable.

_God help me, Casey, I've only wanted you._

Casey wasn't too familiar with trust. Believing something impossible because of the person who said it. She would have said it was stupid. So insanely naïve.

Yet here she was, standing still in a dark room, letting herself be stupid. Letting herself be happy.

Willing to believe it wouldn't come crashing down on her later.

She heard a key at the door and turned as Joseph came in.

"Hey," he shrugged out of jacket, too tired to comment on the lack of light. "You remember that dude Dennis? He asked for your number tonight."

Joseph rubbed a hand over his eyes and missed Casey's reaction.

She didn't have Dennis's number. Oh flufftart.

"Did you give it to him?" she questioned and Joseph scowled at her.

"Course not."

Casey tried really hard not to be annoyed. Far as Joseph knew, he had done the smart thing. He called a goodnight as he traipsed down the hall and Casey blinked after him.

She choked back a sudden laugh. They were doing everything backwards. Normally numbers were exchanged first. Not after…  _everything._

Casey gave up and went to bed. She plopped down on her blankets and stared up at the ceiling. For the first time in her life, Casey hoped that she would dream.


	36. London

Marcia didn't speak a word to her the next morning. Walked by her like she was empty space. Orwell noticed and sent her a concerned glance. Casey just shrugged. She didn't know how to handle Marcia like this and was okay with the quiet until she figured it out.

Barry showed up at the door shortly after Marcia and Claire left. He wasted zero time.

"I think we owe each other an apology." He stated, stepping in. "I… over-reacted."

It was all he was going to say, sum up his behavior in one entirely accurate phrase. Casey nodded.

"Yes. You did."

Barry looked at her expectantly.

Casey faltered in a rush of shame. This conversation was a little too sudden and casual for everything she should probably say to Barry.

"And I put you and Dennis at risk. Barry I'm sorry, I never should have-"

Barry waved a hand, cutting her off, like she was talking nonsense. "What are you talking about. No.  _You_  violated the friend code."

Casey just blinked at him. Barry either didn't get what she was saying or was just simply choosing to skate over it. "Um, the what?"

Barry grabbed her arm and tugged her to the couch, plopping them both down.

"Friend code. You liked someone. You liked  _my brother_. Details like that, you should have spilled."

Casey floundered. She tried to imagine that conversation set somewhere back in a time cloaked every side in lies.  _Yes Barry, I'm hiding from my uncle, not who I say am, totally underage, and crushing on your brother._

Of everything she had done, all the lies and mistakes, Barry was upset because she hadn't told him? That didn't make sense. He knew Casey had been underage when she lived with them, he had to have wondered how long whatever this thing between her and Dennis had been going on. He should be angry about  _so many_  things.

Looking at the forced earnest light in Barry's eye, the way he brushed over every implied action between her and Dennis and himself, she realized something. This was Barry getting them all past it. This was Barry choosing not to harp on the things they should be ashamed of, of the things that would hurt him that he was choosing not to know. This was Barry accepting it, dusting off the undesirables, and choosing to just move on.

It was more than she ever expected from him. More than any of them deserved. She didn't know where the sudden change came from, but she was so grateful.

She hugged him, abruptly, tightly, in a way that if she thought about it she would feel awkward over how sincerely she meant it.

Barry loved her and he loved his brother and he had been left out and hurt because of it but he had decided to be happy, and when Barry decided things he went in whole heartedly.

"I do like him, Barry," Casey said, flushing a little as she pulled back. Her gaze fell in sudden shyness and Barry squirmed.

"Ugh. I still don't know why. He's a total dutz."

He plopped his feet up on the coffee table, and settled his arms behind his head.

"Now. Tell me about Marcia. She fight you yet?" he waggled his brows like he was excited for gossip and Casey rolled her eyes.

"No. and that isn't nice Barry. I think she's actually hurt and I didn't want that. But," she felt like a total jerk for admitting this, "I don't really know what I'm supposed to apologize for? To her I mean, I don't know that I did anything."

"You probably didn't. But you're sorry she's hurt so maybe just apologize for that?"

Casey frowned, considering it, that felt like a total cop out. She leaned back against the couch cushions.

"Um, Barry?" she said after a moment. He sent her a sideways look in question.

"Can I have Dennis's number?"

She had no idea why he thought it was so funny, but Barry threw his head back and laughed for a long time.

* * *

Dennis kept missing his brother. Every time he came home, Barry was out. Whatever stilted conversation they needed to have kept getting put on hold and Dennis just continued his life around that fact.

His phone buzzed as he entered the apartment and he frowned at the unknown number, thinking it was one of those scam, you won a free phone texts.

It wasn't.

_Dennis? It's Casey. I'm not entirely sure Barry gave me the right number…_

Dennis's hands went still and he scowled at the way his heart kicked in his chest. All from reading her name.

-he did-

He hit send then immediately wanted to back pedal. That sounded too cold. He should have said something nice. But another message came through.

_Oh good. He was surprisingly cheerful about it actually._

-it's Barry. He's cheerful about everything-

Casey laughed from where she was seated on her bed. She felt so stupid for being nervous but she had never gotten to do this in high school, text the guy she liked.

The guy she liked.

It sounded so… silly. But when her phone dinged she almost dropped it in her haste to read the next message.

-I'm glad you texted. I was working on ways to get your number-

Casey wondered if 'working on ways' was code for trying to convince Barry to fork it over. She went to reply but then spotted Marcia walk by her open door. She scrambled out of bed.

"Hey, Marcia." The girl didn't stop. "Marcia!" she tried again and Marcia paused. She turned in a slow circle and faced Casey impatiently, brow raised.

"I just wanted to say I was sorry. That you're upset. I didn't realize that you were talking about Dennis, and we weren't even-"

Marcia scoffed, cutting her off. She looked away, arms crossed and toes tapping. "Whatever, Casey."

She walked away and Casey sighed. Well so much for that.

She went back into her room and closed the door, remembering she had never answered Dennis's text.

_Can we meet up?_

It shouldn't make her nervous, waiting for a reply. It shouldn't make her fight a stupid smile and stare a little too distractedly at the wall across from her.

Her phone dinged. She read the message.

-of course-

Casey gave up and let herself smile.

* * *

There was an incessant knocking on the door while Casey was getting ready. Orwell had stepped into the hall and was just staring at it, making no move to actually see who was there. Casey passed by him, shaking her head a little. He could talk for hours nonstop but froze whenever there was unplanned social interactions. Casey was the only other one home now to answer the door.

She peaked out the window to see who was there. Barry was back and prancing in place on their door step. She had barely gotten the door open before he bounded inside.

"Babygirl, you'll never guess. Well you should guess because I'm awesome, but look!" He shoved a paper at her, hugging her before she could read it.

"I did it, Case, I actually did it!"

Her feet tangled as he spun her and Casey clung to his arms, half laugh, half annoyed.

"Did  _what_  Barry?"

He stopped dancing her around long enough to look at her like she was ridiculous.

"I won, of course. The contest. The exchange program. I'm  _in it._ "

Her confusion turned into excitement and Casey hugged him, "Barry that's awesome! Congratulations!"

She let him spin her, laughing, breathless when he stopped. He stepped back long enough to look at her with a strange amount of seriousness.

"Now. I didn't mention anything before because I knew it was a long shot that I'd even get in, and then I wanted to make sure everything between us was, you know, settled. Which it is, right, we're cool?"

He cocked a brow at her and waited for a response. Casey nodded once she had caught up to his words.

"yeah, of course we are. But what are you talking about?"

"Babydoll," He grinned, taking a breath before his presentation, "the school they want to send me to… It's in London."

Casey gaped at him. "you mean, like London, London?"

Barry rolled his eyes, "No I mean the one in Florida,  _yes of course_ I mean London!"

Casey coloured, "Barry, that's wonderful, it's just so  _far._ How, how long?"

He shrugged, nonchalantly, but his hands tightened a little on his arms. "Six months to start. If I do well, maybe longer."

He shrugged again, but his eyes were full. Dancing with joy and worry and a wariness like he was afraid to leave.

"That's exciting, Barry. It really is."

"You know I'm going to miss you, Case. I'll drive you crazy because I'm going to call you everyday. You'll get so sick of listening to me that you'll be glad I went."

She laughed. She laughed and she hugged him and she told herself to ignore that automatic kick of panic in her gut. Barry had earned this, he deserved to go. It wasn't his fault she had come to depend on him. On him stopping by, checking in, hanging out and making her laugh and not leaving her alone in this new place. He had made it easy. The thought of living here without Barry, facing Marcia and Claire's cold attitude suddenly didn't sit right.

But even as she thought it, she knew that was weakness thinking. She was being ridiculous. But Casey had spent her life learning to withstand the hands of shadows, she had never really learned how to just deal with real life.

She went out on the weekends because Barry made her. She had begun to make friends because of his influence. She liked who Casey was when Barry was around. The Casey without him was just boring.

But if she was honest. Sometimes she missed boring.

"Have you told Dennis, Jade?"

Barry stopped bouncing in place and bowed dramatically, "Nope. First honor is all yours. Plus I want to tell them in person and they're busy. I knew you'd be home."

He said it like a teasing insult, and Casey rolled her eyes.

"Well I'm supposed to see Dennis ina bit, you want me not to mention it?"

Barry waggled his brows when she mentioned seeing his brother but didn't comment on that part.

"Nah. You can tell him. Jade's the one I want to surprise. The look on her face when she finds out my 'trash dress' got me into London." He rubbed his hands. "now I gotta go. Lots to finalize. I'll see ya around hun!"

He made it to the door then stopped to shoot her a pointed look, "have fun on your daaate." His sing song voice had her cheeks heating and Barry skipped away.

"Who are you dating?" Orwell asked from the hall, recovering from Barry's whirling visit.

"Barry's brother." Casey answered, not looking at her roommate, still staring at the door Barry had blown through.

"Oh," Orwell shrugged and moved down the hall, completely out of touch with everything that went on. "I didn't know he had a brother."

* * *

Dennis had suggested to meet in the park, a simple walk from the house and Casey enjoyed the sunshine. Every morning woke colder than the last but the days still held some warmth.

She shook her head, still not able to quite believe it. Barry, in London. Somehow the thought suited him.

She tugged on the sleeves of her long green sweater when a passing breeze turned colder than she would have liked. It felt like she had completely missed summer. Everything, with her uncle, moving into her new home, finding a job and starting classes, had her watching the bright sunny months pass from shaded window.

But Casey didn't really mind. She didn't like the cold, but she liked the feel of fall. When things slowed down and places turned cozy and no one looked at her twice when she wore her sweatshirt everywhere she went. She wasn't wearing it now.

She didn't need it, it wasn't all that cold yet, and her sweater was nice. She hadn't worn it since she had bought it at the mall. She was still surprised Barry had managed to choose something so sensible. It was soft and didn't feel like it wanted to strangle her, like it wanted to expose her.

She stopped at a cross walk, feeling suddenly unsure. She wasn't that far from home, she could run back and grab her jacket. That would be fine. She wouldn't be that late.

Dennis would understand.

And she knew how true that was. Dennis would understand without explanation why she tugged on a jacket she didn't need. He wouldn't question for a moment.

She remembered then, the trip through the subway coming back from the mall, the people that pressed on every side. Leaning back against Dennis and the solid way he had stayed, fixed behind her. Simple support. Somehow fitting exactly what she needed.

The light changed and Casey took a step forward. She wasn't that far from the park, and she didn't want to be late.

* * *

Dennis stood beside a worn picnic table, back to the sunshine, calmly watching the path to the park. A few people jogged by but he ignored them. He had gotten here early, foolishly so. He knew how long it would take him to walk here and somehow he had not been able to refrain from leaving his apartment 15 minutes early.

He was waiting now, and he resisted the urge to rock back on his heels. He wouldn't fidget. He wasn't nervous. He could stand still and wait here like a reasonable person. He wasn't worried. He wasn't repeatedly trying to ignore the thoughts that maybe she wouldn't come.

He wasn't.

A group of women walked by and he saw a few eyeing him warily. He forgot sometimes he made people uncomfortable when he just stood around, out of place in a pleasant park.

He ground out a sigh and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He felt his phone but didn't pull it out, didn't check the time for the fourteenth time since he had been standing here.

It had been her idea to meet up. She had reached out to him. She wouldn't have done that if she didn't want to see him.

He was on the way to driving himself insane when he saw her.

She walked alone, pace slowing as her eyes searched. She hadn't spotted him yet. Dark hair caught in the breeze, danced across her lips and absent fingers brushed it away. She was warm, lighter. He recognized the sweater, the one she didn't know he had chosen. It fit her, subdued still, but freer than what she normally wore. Softer. His pulse shifted into something uncertain. She was beautiful.

He stepped out onto the path and her eyes were drawn to the movement, widened in surprise as a blush stole her cheeks.

"oh, Hey!" Casey came to a halt. She had been looking at the path that was closer to his apartment, hadn't realized he had come down this far to meet her. His eyes lightened and his shoulder lifted in an amused shrug at her surprise.

"Hey," he answered quietly. She stepped forward quickly, a veiled eagerness in her eye that sent a spike of joy through him, falling into step beside him as he turned and started walking.

"I like your sweater." She blushed at his compliment, fingers smoothing the fabric.

"Thanks. It's soft."

Dennis eyed her as he settled against the picnic table and she took the seat beside him. "I'm sure it is."

There was something in his tone that sent her cheeks to scarlet and her fingers tangled.

"Barry has news!" she blurted out, to stop herself from stammering out something stupid. Dennis cocked a brow and patiently waited for her to finish. "He, uh, he won that design competition."

Dennis's expression did not change. "Good for him," he deadpanned.

Casey smiled a little. She knew Dennis was completely sincere but you couldn't read it anywhere on him.

"Yeah. He's excited. Turns out it wasn't just a contest though. That's why it took them so long to judge the thing. It's an exchange program."

Dennis looked at her in question, and Casey drew in a breath.

"Barry is going to London."

She watched the surprise hit him. It reached his eyes first. Then his brow. He turned forward, staring out.

"For how long?" his voice was casual.

"Six months. Maybe longer." Her voice had softened, watching him take it in.

"You'll miss him," she added after a moment, and he hummed in acknowledgment, eyes watching the street. Her hand sneaked out and covered his arm. She felt tension.

"It'll be quiet." He finally said, and Casey chuckled.

"That's not necessarily a bad thing."

Dennis scoffed a little, then leaning back he settled an arm intently over her shoulders. It seemed an easy motion but it didn't fool Casey. He was distracted, seeking small comfort in his own way. Dennis cared about his brother and really would mis him.

Casey settled against his side, solid warmth and that familiar scent. She had missed just being close to him. Not talking or trying, just comfortable. Not nervous when he reached out. Not second guessing everything.

Her heart flipped a little when she felt his head turned, his lips press a kiss to her hair. It was completely unexpected. The kind of gentle touch she knew was lurking beneath his strong ones. She wondered what it would be like, drawing them out. Seeing more of the slightly unguarded moments where Dennis relaxed past the person even he was used to.

A car honked loudly and Casey started, feeling Dennis draw back a little. He sat just a bit stiffer, withdrew his arm but didn't shift away. He reached out with soft intention and took her hand, still connected.

Casey smiled. This was good too.

* * *

Dennis didn't let go of her hand. He walked beside her when she had to get back for class, kept pace and held a comfortable silence. She liked it, in a stupid, silly, gleeful kind of way. She liked being tucked against his side and not walking alone. She liked knowing he wanted to walk with her.

She hesitated before they reached the house and he stopped, looking down at her. Casey scowled. She was pretty sure Marcia would be ticked if Dennis walked her to the door. She didn't really care but she didn't necessarily want to deal with it either.

Dennis stepped back completely unperturbed. "Have a nice class."

Casey smiled, her hand rubbing the back of her neck as she peaked up at him.

"Thanks, you too, I mean… thanks."

Dennis laughed, a short sound, glancing away. He looked back with sudden intent.

He stepped nearer, his hand catching her fingers at her neck, his thumb tracing her jaw line. His eyes had darkened and Casey choked on her heartbeat.

'Are you nervous?" Dennis asked, voice low enough she couldn't hear it was unsteady, gaze earnest as he came closer.

Casey bit her lip, tempted to lie but there was no hiding it. She nodded once, a tiny motion against his hand and his eyes softened.

"Okay." His lips pressed her forehead briefly.

Casey squeaked and suddenly hugged him, latching on and fighting a stupid blush. She didn't know what had gotten into her. She craved just being close to him but in a moment would panic at the thought of contact. It wasn't out of fear, it sure as hell wasn't because she didn't want it. She didn't know what her problem was. But Dennis wrapped his arms around her and she melted into the solid warmth.

Whatever it was, Casey knew that it was okay.


	37. Stuck

"You can't actually think this is a good idea."

Barry resisted the urge to strangle his sister. He had hunted her down to tell her his news, and all she wanted to talk about was Casey and Dennis. Sometimes that girl got stuck on things and just would not come off it.

"Look. They like each other. A lot from what I can tell, and they're both old enough to make their own choices. Why not just let them be?"

"Because," Jade rolled her eyes like Barry was dense, "It's not good for them. You really don't see the kind of trouble this could cause."

Barry drew in a patient breath, trying to remind himself that Jade's concerns weren't completely unfounded. "Okay. I know Casey did some stupid stuff, but she was scared, and hiding, and only lied to protect herself. She never wanted to hurt anyone and she's fine now." His voice grew heated as he pointed this out, and Jade just looked at him.

"Yeah I get that about Casey,  _she's_ not the one I'm worried about."

Barry's mouth popped open and promptly closed. His disbelief played out in the way he blinked, drew back indignantly, and shifted to face down his sister in a whole new battle.

"Are you  _actually_ saying that you're worried because of  _Dennis?"_

Jade had the decency to look a little uncomfortable, but she didn't back down. Barry cut her off.

" _What the heck do you think he's gonna do to her?"_

"Nothing!" Jade protested, hands in the air in frustration. "He's just older. And a little… rough around the edges, and Casey's so young, and impressionable, and-"

"And what? You think he'd take advantage of that?!"

Barry was beyond angry, and beyond betrayed, and Jade was realizing everything had come out wrong. She had never thought Dennis would intentionally hurt anyone. She just didn't know if he could be sensitive enough.

"Barry, I didn't mean it like that."

Barry wasn't in the mood to listen to her right now. "Look, the only reason I came over here was to tell you I'm leaving."

Jade drew back, "You're what?"

"London. I'm going to London. My trash dress won." He tossed a paper down on the table, glaring at her, "maybe I'll see you before I leave."

He stalked out, and Jade gaped after him. There wasn't much that could make her go silent, but that had done it. She picked up the paper. It was a letter of congratulations to Barry from the school. Her eyes swam and she scoffed.

She had screwed up big time.

* * *

Casey was settled back into the couch, scrolling through her texts with Dennis absent mindedly, smiling at the ones that said goodnight. It was Friday evening and Joseph came in from a late class.

"Hey Case! Wanna go out? Me and the girls are headed out soon."

Casey sent him a half smile. "No thanks," she answered as Claire and Marcia came down the hall.

Marcia scoffed. "Ug, Barry is suddenly too busy to do anything, and now you're just such an egg."

Casey frowned, trying to determine what exactly being an egg meant. "I'm just tired." She mumbled out. It was true. She was exhausted. She had had a full day of class, and a shift at work after.

Marcia rolled her eyes. "You can be tired without being lame."

Claire followed after her obediently as she turned and headed out. Joseph just shrugged and sent Casey a sympathetic look and hollered for them to wait up. It had become obvious the last couple days that Marcia wasn't getting over this any time soon, and frankly, Casey had stopped trying.

She mostly just got the cold shoulder now, with half comments meant to sting thrown in here and there for fun. The whole thing just felt childish and Casey was getting a little fed up. But she kept quiet and kept the peace and relearned what it was like to be alone.

But that wasn't really true. Even though he had been busy, Dennis still checked in on her. A text in the morning. A call on his break. She felt steadier now. Calmer.

And she was losing her freaking mind.

Dennis made her completely comfortable and somehow managed to also put her completely on edge. He pooled heat into her stomach just by looking at her until all of a sudden the thought of him kissing her made her want to die in a fit of embarrassment. And it was all because of that stupid label Barry had slapped onto them.  _Casey's dating my brother._

Well Casey had never dated anyone before. And she didn't know  _how._

She had seen couples in high school who gushed and were gooey and bought each other bears for their two week anniversary and it sure seemed to make them happy but to Casey that didn't seem remotely interesting.

She couldn't imagine Dennis doing any of those things.

She didn't want to.

But she could imagine a whole lot of other things that made her feel truly insane.

Truth was, Casey didn't even know how to be a girlfriend, let alone a good one. And she was wondering how long it was going to take Dennis to figure that out.

She had set her phone on silent and realized a text had come through a couple minutes before.

She pounced on it.

-are you free? I'm off work early-

Casey stared down at her sweatpants.

_Yes, but I'm not changing._

Maybe she should have thought before she sent that but it was too late now.

-pajamas?-

_Close enough._  Casey admitted. She remembered the time Dennis had found her in Barry's matching cat shirt. At least this wasn't worse.

-should I come there?-

Casey snuggled down further into the couch, excited at the prospect of getting Dennis  _and_ not having to go out. She had avoided having him over because of Marcia's drama. But they were gone now and she happily texted Dennis back

It took him twenty two minutes to arrive and Casey hadn't moved from her spot a single inch. The knock at the door sent her up right, though, and she bounded up so fast to open it, it was practically an out of body experience.

Dennis took her in. Wide, sleepy eyes and slightly mussed hair. Black sweats faded to not quite match the unequally faded black shirt. Tension drained from him at the sight.

He let himself step forward, pulling her close, hugging her against him with a gentle kind of insistence that showed he had been waiting to do this all day. Her hair brushed over his knuckles and slipped between his fingers. Every curve fit against him and he inhaled slowly. Work had been unusually frustrating and just the feel of her warmth brought a soothing depth of calm.

It felt strange, in a way, having the right to do this. To reach and know she would want his touch. To be allowed to hold what he wanted so close.

Casey let out a little hum and snuggled against him, fully intending to fall asleep on the spot.

"May I actually come in?" Dennis asked lightly after a moment. He hadn't even stepped through the door way. She shook her head against him and snuggled closer.

"Nope."

But after a second she groaned and stepped back.

"Fine," she turned back to the couch and let him follow. "How was work?" she asked over her shoulder, and Dennis considered.

"Long." He answered simply. He settled onto the couch, watched her turn and curl against him, head tilting back to catch his soft smile. She was watching him. Eyes that had learned to be blank and empty, eyes that had sheltered, fathomless depths locked behind careful expression, were full and soft and looking at him like she was  _happy_  he was there.

She smiled at him. He could tell she was tired, the slightly giddy kind that she didn't do often. It was fascinating to watch, the way it animated her facial expressions. How they changed.

She frowned suddenly, sitting up almost indignantly.

"Am I an egg?"

Dennis coughed a little in surprise. "an… egg?" he repeated, and Casey nodded.

"Do you wish I was interesting?" She asked like it would explain what she meant, and Dennis frowned, confused.

"You are interesting." He countered, and her look said she didn't believe him.

"But we could have done something, gone…" she waved her hand at the door in a vague gesture, "out."

"Did you want to go out?" he countered reasonably, and Casey sighed.

"Well. No." her fingers twirled as she sorted through what words to use to explain whatever it was she was trying to say.

"I just… don't want to bore you."

Dennis laughed. A sudden, genuine, amused laugh and Casey shot him a look.

"I didn't mean to laugh," he cleared his throat, sobering. He had been concerned all along that the quiet way he lived would grow stale for Casey. He never for a moment considered she would be worried about boring  _him._

"and I don't think you're an egg." He added.

He looked so serious when he said it. So sincere. Casey started laughing now.

Dennis just watched her, shaking his head with the barest of smiles. How on earth could she ever think she was boring.

When she finally swallowed her laughter, she settled back against his side. At his prodding, she told him about her day. She felt like she was babbling. But he remembered the people she mentioned, asked for clarification here or there, seemed actually interested and Casey let herself talk.

He was relaxed, leaned back, arms folded, her head against his shoulder. She stretched, turning into him, her hand raising to grip his forearm. It was comfortable, simple. His sleeves were pushed up and the tips of her fingers trailed across the bare skin of his arm.

Dennis shifted, clasped her fingers with his own, and held them still. Focused on her words.

She had been jumpy lately. Pulled back into herself whenever she would catch that heat in his eye. He was scared of pushing her, of letting it show and making her uncomfortable.

He knew how Casey could respond to a touch, and he didn't know why now, all of a sudden, she was uncertain.

But he would be careful.

She wasn't exactly making it easy. She was pressed against the entire side of him and seemed completely comfortable.

She asked about his day and Dennis shrugged.

"It was fine."

"Well what did you do?" Her fingers had snuck out of his hold and were playing with the hem of his sleeve.

Dennis cleared his throat. "Worked."

She peered up at him at his single word answer. "Well you said it was long. What was frustrating about it?"

He shrugged easily, glancing down at her. "I can't remember now."

He said it as simple fact, but the unintentional tenderness of the statement washed over Casey and she flushed.

She pushed up, her eyes searching his with a look of almost concern.

"Are we actually doing this, Dennis? Are we… together now?" she trailed off, feeling almost foolish, irritated with herself for even having to ask. She didn't feel the scowl on her own features. She watched that little frown form between his brows.

"Well I thought we were." He pulled his arm free and clasped his hands. His gaze dropped and focused solely on his fingers, unmoving. "Aren't we?"

She never thought she would hear him sound little.

Not little, no, cut back and pulled into a sudden corner. Like he was afraid.

It hit her then. What it had sounded like, what he thought she was saying. Like she didn't want to be with him.

"Oh Marcia's right, I'm such an egg."

There was surprise enough of her statement to have him turn enough to look at her, wary confusion in hardened eyes, and Casey leaned in.

She kissed him softly, tentatively as he was still frozen, holding back.

She pressed closer, body leaned against him, fingers slipping against the skin of his neck.

She heard a small sound, a muffled groan as he responded to her lips seeking against hers. Light traces at first, but there was energy behind it.

His hand found her hip and Casey broke the kiss with a gasp, her forehead falling against his.

"Of course we are." she panted. He hummed a little in response. His eyes were closed and she felt the heat of his fingers softly rubbing her side. They stayed like that a moment, suspended.

"I should go," Dennis finally murmured, his eyes still closed. When Casey went to protest they snapped open. Her thoughts stumbled over each other at the wave of intense heat in his eye.

"Trust me, Casey, I should go."

She told herself to be a big girl and to sit back. She drew her knees up to her chest and watched him roll his shoulder, and inhale slowly, before giving her an even look.

"Can I see you tomorrow?"

Casey nodded, "I'd like that."

He stood, stopping to press a kiss on her forehead. "Good night, Casey."

When the others got home later, Casey had fallen asleep on the couch. Joseph just chuckled a little and tugged a blanket over her, wondering at the small smile on her face.

* * *

Jade was going to see Casey. She needed to straighten some things out. And probably apologize. She had ranted to Luke and even he had sided with Barry. This was getting ridiculous and she did not like feeling like a jerk.

She still wasn't entirely sure she had acted like one. But they were right. Casey and Dennis could do whatever they wanted. She didn't have to agree with it. She just had to keep her mouth shut about it.

She knew Casey would be at work soon, and headed to the university instead of the house she shared with her roommates. She walked inside the glass doors and stopped short of running right into David Dunn.

"Excuse me. Oh, Jade. Hello." He greeted her, looking startled for some unearthly reason and Jade cocked a brow.

"Hey. What are you doing here," she paused to talk and watched him shrug.

"Visiting Joseph."

Something was off. She watched the man turn slightly, slide something into his pocket he didn't want her to see. As a flight attendant she had been trained to recognize evasive behavior. For a cop, he wasn't doing that great of a job at not looking suspicious and Jade frowned. "Joseph isn't here right now. He's at home." It was a total guess, but the man nodded.

"Right, yeah I got my times mixed up. I was headed there next."

Jade's eyes narrowed. "I call bull."

David's brow hiked up at the challenge. "What?"

"You're being sneaky. Why."

"That's none of your business."

He was right, it wasn't, but Jade was in a pushy mood and David Dunn was a man who didn't easily back down. Joseph could do with a little more of that.

"It's not. I'm just curious."

To her surprise, he gave in. He had always liked Jade and respected the way she handled herself.

"Casey's scholarship, from the police force. I'm dropping off payment."

Simple answer, and Jade maybe would have bought it if he hadn't tried to hide it at first.

"Hmm," she pursed her lips, "I didn't realize you were the office secretary."

He ignored that remark.

"and scholarships aren't usually paid in installments."

He smiled, and Jade had to admit he was a fine-looking man when he wasn't being difficult, Joseph had definitely gotten that from his father.

"It's not from the police." He admitted, and Jade hummed a little.

"From you?"

He looked away, embarrassed, "Just partially."

Jade didn't comment on how kind that was, how involved he had been in getting Casey's life back together. She soaked in that realization and let it slide for now. He looked embarrassed enough as is.

"Where's the other part coming from?"

He watched her, debating whether he should tell. It wasn't any of Jade's business, that was for darn sure. But these past months had played out in a way Detective Dunn had not been expecting and he felt it was only fit to clue her in.

"Most of it's coming from Dennis Crumb."

He had surprised her. Enough so that her mouth popped open. Yeah, he hadn't really seen it coming either. Barry and Jade had pestered him to death during the investigation and getting Casey re-situated, been by that girl's side every step of the way. He had thought Dennis would have been a problem, too protective, too involved. But he had stepped back. He had let it play out how it needed to and that was the sole reason David Dunn had agreed to keep him apprised of everything.

It was Dennis's idea for the scholarship, Dennis's insistence that no one know. Dennis had supported in silence and had refused to even be thanked. It had changed his opinion of the man.

He watched the guilt flash in Jade's eye and got the sneaking suspicion that it was changing hers too.

He stepped back, feeling faintly smug. "You have a good day, Jade."

Standing alone in the foyer, Jade swore.

What was she supposed to do now.

* * *

"You're throwing a party for Barry?" Casey asked, looking down at the invitation Dennis had handed to her. He huffed a little.

"No, Barry's throwing one. I'm sure Jade would have put something together but he beat her to it."

Casey stared down at the colorful paper. "This is for tonight." She realized, and Dennis just shrugged.

"It's Barry."

Casey laughed a little, folding her arms against a breeze that blew down the path they walked. She'd chosen the park to meet in again and she was glad she had. Every time the wind blew Dennis would shift, pulling her that much closer. It was heady being able to just casually lean against him.

"It's so strange that he's leaving," she murmured. The arm he had around her waist shifted as he shrugged.

"It is."

"What are you going to do?" Casey asked. She meant it almost rhetorically but Dennis considered.

"I might move."

"Move?" Casey was not expecting that.

"There's a place at work. It needs some work done. Repairs would cover the cost of living there."

Casey blinked at him. "You're going to live at the zoo."

He smirked a little at the look on her face. " _By_  the zoo," he corrected her, "and I haven't decided yet."

They stopped by the water, watching it flow, before Dennis glanced at his watch.

"You have to get to work," he said, stepping away. Casey peered up at him.

"I'll see you tonight?"

He smiled slightly, there was wind in the trees and people passing by them, but she held his entire intent.

"You will," he nodded once before stepping back, and Casey softly watched him go.

* * *

Barry stood in front of his closet, throwing scarves over his shoulder, looking for his sweater vest. He was on the phone with Marcia and she kept distracting him.

"Yes. It's tonight. At my place. But listen. This is a drama free zone. I don't care what you've got going on between you and Casey. Tonight it about me being fabulous. I want you guys to come but if you can't play nice you're not invited."

He listened a moment and rolled his eyes, "Yes I'll tell Casey that too."

It was a lie, but Marcia didn't need to know that.

"Yes Joseph can come."

Dang it, He'd forgotten about him. Hopefully he wouldn't be offended he hadn't gotten an invite personally.

He nodded with the phone wedged against his shoulder, finally finding his sweater. "Yes Jade will be there."

She might not know it yet, but she was coming. He'd get Luke to drag her if he had to.

He was leaving soon and he wanted the people he cared about to be in one place and happy for him and they  _would_  be happy whether they liked it or not.

"So are you coming?" Barry asked. There was a beat of silence before Marcia promised she wouldn't miss it for the world.

Barry grinned and hung up. Tonight was going to go great.


	38. Care

Casey pushed through the double doors, almost out of breath. She would have to go straight to Barry's from work and even then she would be a few minutes late. She wondered how many people Barry had invited. He knew plenty, that was for sure, and she steeled herself for a crowd.

She wasn't prepared for the déjà vu of walking down that hall towards the apartment on the end. The damp smell, the worn green door. Would it feel strange, knocking somewhere she used to live?

She didn't get the chance to find out. The door swung open before she could raise her hand and Barry grabbed her wrist.

"You're late." He tugged her inside, "Everyone's here." He dropped an actual party hat on her head. "Go mingle," he shooed her inside, fairly vibrating with excitement. There was music pouring from the living room, a crowd of people visible at the end of the small hall and Casey side stepped into the kitchen, taking a breath.

She reached up to remove the pointed hat, heard a snicker behind her.

Joseph was laughing at her, propped against the counter, party hat in place. "Nice of you to show."

Marcia turned around at his words, and looked a little surprised to see her.

"Hey Casey…" there were cat ears on her party hat and Casey was stuck wondering how they had gotten there, "You look nice…"

Casey glanced down. That wasn't true. She had dressed for work in a hurry and had gotten even more disheveled since. She looked at Marcia mistrustingly, she was being nice.

"Thanks…" she sent Joseph a half questioning look. "You do too."

The difference was Casey actually meant it. Marcia looked fantastic.

She grinned, "Thanks. There's some stuff in the other room if you want to decorate your hat. Barry has a  _ton_  of art supplies." She laughed a little, threw Casey a smile. It wasn't completely sincere but it seemed sincerely intentional.

"Oh, maybe in a bit." Casey gave her a smile back and watched her leave the small kitchen. She blew out a breath. That was weird.

Joseph shrugged, "Guess she's over it," he sent Casey a look that said he gave up then tipped his hat to her. "I'm getting a drink, want anything?"

"No thanks."

Casey was left alone in the relatively quiet kitchen. She could hear the conversation buzzing in the other room. She willed herself to go out and be a part of this celebration for Barry.

She stepped into the living room, full of people she didn't recognize. Friends of Barry from school and work talked and laughed over the beat of the music. Almost all of them had their hats on, a universal acknowledgment that you just don't say no to Barry.

Her eyes were scanning for Dennis, certain she'd spot him easily, standing out of place, but he wasn't there. Maybe he had ducked into his room for a while. She moved to check, and had to stop short of walking into Jade.

"Good. You came. Come with me."

Jade tugged her down the hall, passing Dennis's room as he exited it. Their eyes met and her feet slowed, but Jade just waved a hand, "yeah, yeah, she'll see you in a minute."

Dennis stood blinking after them as Jade tugged Casey into Casey's old room and shut the door behind them.

He sighed. He had been waiting for Casey to show up before even attempting to mingle with the crowd of noise happening in his living room. But this whole thing was to congratulate Barry, and Dennis turned down the hall and entered the party alone.

Marcia caught sight of Dennis stepping into the living room, and her stomach twisted. She knew everyone was getting a little tired of the way she was acting but she just couldn't help it sometimes. Dennis had seemed so nice and she was so sick of boys that were sweet just long enough to try and get with her. Claire followed her gaze and tried to distract her, shoving another hat into her hands to decorate, but Marcia waved her off. They were here for Barry. And Barry wanted a nice evening. So she could pretend she wasn't hurt, or embarrassed, or wishing she could be anywhere else. She cared about Barry, and she wouldn't mess this up for him.

Her hand on her cup shook a little as she made her way over to Dennis. He was looking above the crowd, not really taking any of them in, but he glanced down when she stopped right in front of him. Marcia swallowed. She had forgotten how intense his eyes were. Wary, but so direct. She shook her head a little,  _focus Marcia._

"Hey," she called out over the noise, "It's crazy about Barry, huh? I can't believe he's moving!"

Dennis shifted a little, his hands pulling out of his pockets and she tried not to watch the way he moved, the way his muscles settled.

"Um, yes. He's done well."

Marcia nodded a little, trying to think of something else to say.

"so… party hat?" she offered, holding one out, and Dennis just  _looked_ at her.

"Right," Marcia laughed a little, stepping back, "I'll see you around Dennis."

He nodded as she walked away, daring her cheeks to heat. She did  _not_ want anyone seeing her blush. That was so awkward! She squeaked a little when she felt someone grab her waist. She was spun around and face to face with Barry before she had a chance to remember any of those moves she had learned in that self defense class Claire had forced her to go to.

"I saw that," Barry was grinning at her, a wide little boy grin that looked so  _happy._ "Thanks, Marcia, I know it's not easy but I'm glad you came."

Marcia relaxed a little, her laugh coming out a little high from embarrassment. Reaching up she tucked the party hat she held onto the one Barry already wore.

"I'm glad I came too."

Barry winked at her and released her, and Marcia moved back to Claire and Joesph, determined to at least try and enjoy the rest of the night.

* * *

Casey tugged her sleeve back in place after Jade and mangled it and sent the woman a more than questioning look.

"Ok. Look. Before you say anything, just let me explain myself."

She seemed surprised when Casey actually didn't say anything.

"Oh, wow. This is already easier than I thought it would be. Casey, I need to tell you something. Back, before when you still lived here, I, I told Dennis to back off."

She watched the shift in Casey's expression and hurried on. "I didn't think it was a good idea. You're so young, and dealing with, well, what you had going on it just wasn't the best thing. I thought you needed time, Casey, and I was worried Dennis would confuse the situation, and…"

Casey had gone a little pale, her hand waving to cut Jade off like she needed time to process what Jade had just said.

"So when Dennis said it was a mistake. That was you?"

Her voice was wooden. Protected. Carefully plain.

Jade told herself to stand up and fess up because she deserved whatever Casey was about to throw at her.

Casey's thoughts moved behind distant eyes. Jade had talked him out of it.

She should be mad.

She wondered why on earth she wasn't furious right now.

But all she could handle right now was relief.

Dennis hadn't stepped back because he had wanted to.

He had done it because Jade had convinced him to. She really shouldn't have meddled but if she had convinced Dennis the best thing to do would be to walk away then he would have listened. If he believed he was supposed to do it then he would have. She couldn't fault him for that.

She wanted to fault him for listening to Jade though.

But she couldn't do that either. Because in a weird, convoluted way, Jade had been right.

Casey had needed time. She needed time to heal and to rest and have thoughts without fear, desires without that crimson shadow of guilt. To love untainted and she couldn't do that before.

She hadn't known how.

But Jade had been wrong. Casey may have needed time to sort herself out but Dennis wouldn't have confused that. He helped that. He wasn't a crutch or something to latch onto so she wouldn't be alone. She hadn't just wanted  _someone._ She had wanted Dennis.

"You shouldn't have done that, Jade." Casey finally answered quietly, and Jade threw her hands in the air.

"Well I know that  _now._  I was wrong, kay. Com-flipping-pletely wrong. I know you're probably mad, but could you forgive me eventually because I promise I'll stay out of it from here on in."

Casey was quiet a moment.

"Did you tell Dennis you were wrong?"

Jade floundered a little. "Well, no, not yet. I thought you needed to know, I-"

"You made him think he was a mistake, Jade."

Jade found herself pulling back a little. Casey was a little thing, but there was a little too much control in her voice compared to the anger in her eyes. It was the quiet ones that always got you.

"You're right." Jade realized. She hadn't thought about how her screwing up had affected Dennis too. She'd all but convinced him he was going to screw Casey over just by  _being_  with her.

"You're right, I should talk to him." At Casey's look Jade swore, "alright, alright, I'll go do it now."

"Jade," Casey stopped her at the door, and the woman turned.

"Yeah?"

Casey drew in a breath. "Thank you."

Jade had no idea what the girl was actually thanking her for, but she shrugged, "sure thing, Case."

She stepped out in the hall and went to find Dennis.

Jade hated apologizing. It seemed she had plenty of it to do before the night was over.

* * *

Dennis stood in the relative silence of his room, listening to the sound of the stereo coming through the walls. Jade had pulled him in here mid party and he was still processing what she had said.

She had talked fast, the noise from the party growing louder as she talked. Phrases stuck in replay in his mind even after she had left.

_I'm sorry._

_I know about the scholarship_

_You're good for her, Dennis. I was an idiot for not seeing it._

She had said some other things but Dennis couldn't get past those. Jade knew him as well as anyone except Barry. She knew what he did and how he was and all the ways he was liable to mess up. She understood the risks he brought with him and he hadn't been at all surprised she hadn't wanted them anywhere near Casey.

He had tried to tell her, that he wouldn't hold Casey back. They were together for now but if she ever wanted to walk away he wouldn't stop her. He'd be what she needed for now.

Jade had just looked at him, a strangely soft expression in her eye.

"Dennis," and she had nudged his arm a little, "I don't think she's ever going to walk away. You're good together. Stay that way."

_Stay that way._

Not, 'don't hold her back', 'don't drag her down', 'don't keep her from being what she needed to be'.

Stay that way. Together. For each other.

In truth he hadn't fully considered it, the prospect of Casey being his for more than just the passing days. He wanted it. Of course he wanted it with something he was almost afraid to admit was inside of him, but it wasn't feasible, it wasn't possible.

But what if. Maybe. What if it was?

His door cracked open and Casey stood there, peeking in to find him. He watched her smile, slip the door just open enough to fit inside. She shut it behind her, breathing out slowly.

"They're playing a game. I don't know what it is but there's a lot of yelling."

As if on cue a cheer rose from the living room, and Dennis cocked a brow.

"You don't want to play?"

Casey scowled at him, "I'll play if you play." She smirked when his arms folded over his chest, dismissing the notion.

Casey came forward, her finger trailing over the edge of his desk, her eyes glancing around a room she had seen a dozen times before.

"Did Jade talk to you?"

She came to stand just before him, head tilted as she peered up at him, a thousand soft questions in her eye.

Dennis swallowed, "Yes."

"You know she was wrong, right?" Her hand raised to his chest, fingers pressing just slightly into him, "She never should have convinced you that we weren't good, that  _you_  weren't good."

Dennis looked away, rolling his shoulder a little. "But I might not be, Casey."

She laughed, a blatant, careless sound, "I might not be either. But I'm learning to be. And a lot of that is because of you, Dennis."

He frowned, "I'm not sure that's true."

She smiled, pressing up on tiptoe to draw closer. "I could convince you."

He cocked a single brow at her. "How."

Casey's stomach flipped at the challenge in his eye, the low edge to his voice. The way he felt tense beneath her fingertips. Her eyes flashed with a light of their own.

Dennis felt his pulse thicken. Casey had spent weeks holding back, shy touch, uncertain energy beneath her touch. There was no holding back now. She crashed into him, soft and demanding and trembling with a different type of energy that rocked him.

Dimly he wondered if they should feel bad. Barry was out there celebrating in a party they were supposed to be a part of, but as another cheer came through the walls, Casey pulled a soft groan out of him. Barry was fine. And Casey wasn't letting him go.

* * *

Jade gathered a handful of plates and cups and tossed them into the trash bin. The last of the guests had left and she wrinkled her nose at the mess. Dennis was gonna have a fit. She turned when Barry entered the room. He had been so busy all evening they had barely talked, and now she raised her chin. One more apology and she was done.

He looked her, a mockingly expectant look on his face. Jade gritted her teeth. Barry was enjoying this.

"I'm sorry."

He sniffed.

"I was wrong."

"I know."

Jade scowled, "Look, yeah I screwed up, I was stupid, I shouldn't have gotten involved. You were right."

His grin flashed, it was like he had said the magic words.

"Of course I was, now enough of this, I have something for you."

He held out a box and Jade took it slowly. "It's your party, aren't we supposed to get you a gift?"

Barry nodded, "Yeah, but you didn't. Apparently I'm the only one with couth in this family."

He plopped on the couch while Jade opened her present.

"What a, hold on, is this?"

Jade pulled out the red fabric from the box, shaking it out, at a loss for words.

"You said you wanted one in red." Barry commented idly, secretly pleased. He had gotten a few friends from school help him make it.

Jade was actually stunned. Barry's little trash dress that she had admired had been recreated in a flowing, vibrant gown that was just gorgeous.

"This is actually incredible, Barry"

Luke came in and nodded appreciatively as Jade held it out to him.

"Well I didn't win for nothing." Barry scoffed, "didn't make you one though," he commented to Luke who waved him off.

"I think I'm okay with that."

Jade hugged the dress, swearing she wasn't going to cry. Her eye liner was on point and just because her little brother was moving  _out of the country_  was no reason to mess it up.

Luke read her face and smiled, pulling her in for a hug.

"He's annoying but I'll miss him," she sniffed, and Barry threw a party hat at them.

"You'll miss me  _because_ I'm annoying."

* * *

They stood shivering outside the airport, bidding Barry goodbye.

He pulled Casey in for a hug tightly, stepping back he dropped one of his scarves around her shoulders.

"Just a pop of color, for me?"

Casey laughed and shook her head, "I'll miss you, Barry."

"Oh, I'll miss you too, Babygirl," he pulled her into another hug. "don't let Dennis get too interesting while I'm gone. I like him boring."

He hugged Jade next, promising to not get so fancy he won't associate with her if she comes and visits.

Dennis let his brother hug him, scoffing a little when Barry intentionally knocked his hat askew. "Take care of Casey. And call me, even if you only have boring things to say."

Dennis rolled his eyes, but he smiled, slipping his arm around Casey as she snuggled close against a sudden gust of wind.

"Have fun in London." Jade called, and Barry pulled a cocky grin.

"Oh I will. You guys just try and have fun without me."


	39. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Truly, thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, and given this fanfic a chance. I have absolutely loved hearing from all of you and seeing your thoughts and reactions. You helped shape this story. 
> 
> And now, a short epilogue to show some moments of simple happiness. Hope you enjoy!

Shadows played with the sunshine, ebbing in and out of view. Heat danced in the shadows. Casey floated in a sleep that felt too light.

Where were the monsters? The fingers that reached and clawed her back down? The sound of her uncle's laugh?

Casey knew she was dreaming, but something wasn't right. Casey's sleep didn't get to be this empty.

Nothing but swaying light in an open space.

Free.

Clear.

Completely unafraid.

Casey opened her eyes, blinking against the beginnings of sunlight. It was early yet, and she stretched beneath the covers, rolling over to face Dennis.

He was asleep still, lips soft and brow furrowed the tiniest amount. Casey lifted a finger to smooth the crinkle between his brows.

He grumbled in his sleep, wrapping an arm around her he pulled her closer against him.

Casey snickered, rubbing her nose against his chest, and he stirred.

"Go back to sleep."

His voice was gruff with sleep, and Casey smiled. She could normally never get Dennis to sleep in, and as she curled tighter against him and felt his sigh of contentment, Casey let herself close her eyes and go back to sleep.

* * *

She never walks away. She never grows bored. Doesn't move on without him.

She does it with him. New home, new life, same quiet shared at the end of the day.

Together they learn, how to breath, how to be stronger, braver without becoming something they're not.

Dennis doesn't dance with her at Jade's wedding. The music is loud and there's people everywhere and she stays tucked close to his side. She laughs at Barry on the dance floor and watches them all, completely content.

But when the music dies and the party finishes he gently takes her home. They dance to golden streetlight and the sound of rain on glass.

Dennis learns. What it's like to wake to warmth beside him, the soft sound of breath that grounds him, stretches him in gentle ways. He learns to let her trace his scars. He learns her touch, but never quite learns how to not feel it deep within him. Still tenses in slight anticipation when she does something simple like reach for his hand. Still feels his heart too fast in his chest when he comes home from work and sees her there, curled up, reading, waiting for him.

She finishes college and Barry flies home for the graduation. London, it seemed, was just the place for him. He hugs his brother and tells Casey he's still not sure what she sees in the stoic man. Dennis just rolls his eyes. But later when they're walking Barry catches him pressing a kiss to Casey's head, and he wants to capture it. That moment, sketch it out in black and white, hang it up and name it something stupid like 'soft lines and even touch.'

He just never thought he'd see that in his brother. The loyalty, yes, the caring way he treated her, yes. Dennis was always a carefully minded man. But the softened tenderness when he looked at Casey. The way he would stand stoic yet you could just  _tell_  he was smiling. Part of him wished his mother was here, to see the man Dennis had become without her.

He wondered if Dennis knew how proud he was of him for that.

Casey glanced back and caught Barry wiping his eyes.

"You okay?" she called, and Barry cleared his throat.

"Course, doll," he caught up to the couple and grabbed Casey's hand.

"He gets you all the time, right now, come with me."

Dennis stuffed his hands in his pockets and watched Barry scurry her off towards the shops down the street. He would catch up with them eventually.

* * *

Dennis waits in the darkened hall, staring at the penguins through the glass. This was Casey's favorite part of the zoo. She would visit him at work and spend half her time watching them. They always made her smile.

She would be here soon, and he tried no to be nervous, to reach repeatedly for the ring in his pocket. Just to make sure it was still there.

His arms folded and his finger drummed against his bicep. He had never gotten the nerve before, to ask Casey for forever. But she was already giving it to him, little by little, day by day, one piece of forever at a time. And he realized he wouldn't be asking. He would be promising. He needed her to know that if she wanted him she would have him for all time.

He hears a step behind him and he turns.

Casey was standing, head tilted and eyes curious, watching him. She could tell he was nervous. A knowing, mischievous look fills her eye and she lifts her fingers to cover her lips, trying not to give herself away.

She starts forward, walking slowly, eyes fixed on the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with.

Lights drift through the water. Cool shadows soften the corners of the hall.

And Dennis smiles.


End file.
